84

South Pole – NSFW

I HATE IT WHEN SANTA STEPS ON MY COCK

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84 comments on South Pole – NSFW

  1. BillsBayou
    November 3, 2010 at 1:33 pm

    Whoever it is smashing his cock with a stiletto heel must be a great swimmer with big flipper duck feet like that.

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

  2. hamoza
    November 3, 2010 at 1:37 pm

    HIS cock? I’m soooo confused & prefer to stay that way.

    The artist got her start painting children & pets , here we see a natural progression …

    Thumb up Thumb down +52

  3. BillsBayou
    November 3, 2010 at 1:40 pm

    At first, I thought it was a woman laying back with a man stepping on her crotch with a GIGANTIC big toe sticking out of a hole in the side of his shoe.

    I had no trouble with that idea. This site has shown me the most bizarre crap being called “art” by talentless hacks. Why wouldn’t it be someone with a 3-pound big toe?

    Thumb up Thumb down +180

  4. BillsBayou
    November 3, 2010 at 1:41 pm

    “Taken from my own photo…”

    Pics or it didn’t happen.

    Thumb up Thumb down +239

  5. hamoza
    November 3, 2010 at 1:49 pm

    @Bills-so that’d be :did you stub your big toe or are you extremely happy to see me?

    Thumb up Thumb down +67

  6. BillsBayou
    November 3, 2010 at 1:53 pm

    @5, if you’re a podiatrist, it would be both!

    Thumb up Thumb down +48

  7. KibblesNBits
    November 3, 2010 at 1:53 pm

    The artist started by doing portraits of pets and children. I’m going to guess the FBI seized those ones.

    Thumb up Thumb down +145

  8. purple_peacock
    November 3, 2010 at 1:54 pm

    I’m speechless. Honestly and truely speechless. Are those moobs I see???

    Thumb up Thumb down +85

  9. butts lol
    November 3, 2010 at 1:54 pm

    #8 yep, that’s Bob. Bob had bitch tits.

    Thumb up Thumb down +132

  10. curlytopnola
    November 3, 2010 at 1:55 pm

    ok. i see a vinyl stiletto boot. i see the cock. i also see shadowy boobs at the top…

    so am i looking at violence against the transgendered?

    because i learned a new word the other night on the regretsy FB site for just this situation.

    and for the record. it wasn’t a flounce.

    Thumb up Thumb down +63

  11. thebeluga
    November 3, 2010 at 1:55 pm

    Is it me or does that man have boobs?
    Either or way, I always where my rain boots in bed too.

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

  12. KibblesNBits
    November 3, 2010 at 1:55 pm

    Bitch tits with wonky nips.

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

  13. thebeluga
    November 3, 2010 at 1:55 pm

    *WEAR wtf

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  14. June Clever
    November 3, 2010 at 1:56 pm

    I’m jealous of his perky breasts and curves… bet hes awesome in drag.

    Thumb up Thumb down +30

    • Kariswen
      December 24, 2011 at 7:31 pm

      Are we looking at the same strange flapjack tits? Perky compared to what? A fried egg on a nail?

      Thumb up Thumb down 0

  15. joshpincusiscrying
    November 3, 2010 at 1:56 pm

    one of a kind and will never be copied
    Promise?

    Thumb up Thumb down +123

  16. HermesGoddess
    November 3, 2010 at 1:59 pm

    Yeah yeah, big shiny cock, transitioning tranny, kick in the ding ding, blah blah boringcakes. What I need to know is…where is the HEEL of that boot?? Inquiring minds want to know.

    Thumb up Thumb down +46

  17. starrydreams
    November 3, 2010 at 2:01 pm

    #14- Hermes Goddess- where’s the heel? Perhaps buried in balls?

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  18. and Stretch65 as “The Count”
    November 3, 2010 at 2:03 pm

    Sticking with Killer’s Xmas theme – I see this painting being called “THE NUTCRACKER”

    Thumb up Thumb down +70

  19. hamoza
    November 3, 2010 at 2:05 pm

    @Stretch-that’s ‘Nutcracker Sweet’ baby!
    Yech.

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  20. and Stretch65 as “The Count”
    November 3, 2010 at 2:05 pm

    Either that or over the course of two days we’ve gone from Granny’s to Tranny’s

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  21. hamoza
    November 3, 2010 at 2:06 pm

    Grannys to Trannys-great name for a big band.

    Thumb up Thumb down +48

  22. magic knickers
    November 3, 2010 at 2:07 pm

    Just…. wtf.

    Thumb up Thumb down -1

  23. Notouch
    November 3, 2010 at 2:15 pm

    Worst prostate massage EVER!

    Thumb up Thumb down +43

  24. hamoza
    November 3, 2010 at 2:16 pm

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -18

  25. Sparkles
    November 3, 2010 at 2:16 pm

    It really doesn’t matter how much I squint or tilt my head when I look at this.

    It’s kinda like one of those magic eye thingys.

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  26. Wilma Fingerdoo
    November 3, 2010 at 2:16 pm

    Jangled bells.

    Thumb up Thumb down +22

  27. Buzzkill Crying Glitter Eagle
    November 3, 2010 at 2:16 pm

    Egads.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  28. Bratfink
    November 3, 2010 at 2:19 pm

    I keep seeing a finger. Someone isn’t real good at drawing dicks. I do better than that just doodling.

    Or maybe it’s just me.

    I’ll pass on this one.

    Thumb up Thumb down +17

  29. angel drawers
    November 3, 2010 at 2:20 pm

    How about this one by the same artist? Where is the other girl’s head?
    http://www.etsy.com/listing/58767588/original-oil-painting-aceo-miniature?ref=v1_other_1

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  30. Patty got abducted by a Steampunk Alien
    November 3, 2010 at 2:23 pm

    I’m guessing this is the “artist’s interpretation” of his “own photo” because I’m totally getting one of those “objects seem larger than they are” kind of vibes.

    Oh, Jebus, I said “vibes”.

    Thumb up Thumb down +34

  31. Sparkles
    November 3, 2010 at 2:24 pm

    #27…I think the other girl’s head is on backwards. Tilt your head to the right, stand on one leg, and whistle. You’ll see it.

    Thumb up Thumb down +24

  32. SimpleTerms
    November 3, 2010 at 2:26 pm

    “I HATE IT WHEN SANTA STEPS ON MY COCK”

    Bwa ha

    If I had a time for every drawing I have seen of Santa stepping on cocks….

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  33. hamoza
    November 3, 2010 at 2:29 pm

    AKA ‘Cock Block’

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

  34. SimpleTerms
    November 3, 2010 at 2:31 pm

    Oops… make that “dime”

    He he

    If I had a dime for every time I forgot to spell check my Santa-is-into-cock-and-ball-torture postings…

    Thumb up Thumb down +31

  35. Solipsy
    November 3, 2010 at 2:43 pm

    I think the seller may be overstating the uniqueness of this painting. I’ve done at least six works with nearly identical themes. That was the weirdest life-drawing class, ever. What? Is there something wrong with that?

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

  36. and Stretch65 as “The Count”
    November 3, 2010 at 2:46 pm

    #23 looking at this makes me see sparkles, then a sharp excruciating pain followed by blacking out.

    Alternate titles: HAVE A BALL THIS CHRISTMAS
    SANTA’S SUGARPLUM SQUASH

    Thumb up Thumb down +21

  37. Qui
    November 3, 2010 at 2:50 pm

    Ow?

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  38. Trillian
    November 3, 2010 at 2:51 pm

    Well. That’s the last time *I* surf over to regretsy with my eight year old standing behind me!

    And why are Mr Cock’s pecs different sizes? He’s rocking a solid B cup on the left, complimented by the stretched nipple. Ew.

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  39. hamoza
    November 3, 2010 at 2:53 pm

    @#34Trillian-most ‘ladies’ are asymetrical dontcha’ know.

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  40. jinglebat
    November 3, 2010 at 3:01 pm

    I had to look at this for awhile before before I could even tell what the hell it was. Worst Magic Eye poster ever.

    Thumb up Thumb down +21

  41. ladycrim
    November 3, 2010 at 3:08 pm

    I know an S&M-themed coffee shop that would probably love this …

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  42. and Stretch65 as “The Count”
    November 3, 2010 at 3:10 pm

    #33 Qui Ow! qui Owqui quiqui!!

    Thumb up Thumb down -1

  43. mad2physicist
    November 3, 2010 at 3:28 pm

    Does anyone else notice that the person with the cock also appears to have boobs?

    So far just commenters #8, #9, #10, #11, #12, #14, #38, and #39. -HK

    Thumb up Thumb down +26

  44. StaticCling
    November 3, 2010 at 3:43 pm

    Yay, a stiletto bladder piercing!

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  45. knittin-kitten
    November 3, 2010 at 3:53 pm

    I think someone needs to look up the word ‘erotic’.

    Thumb up Thumb down +30

  46. Nico
    November 3, 2010 at 4:03 pm

    I guess when it takes a full minute to register in our brains as possibly NSFW, we’re either going to call it art, or make an appointment with the optometrist.

    Thumb up Thumb down +17

  47. GoNutsforDoNuts
    November 3, 2010 at 4:06 pm

    This clearly falls under the “futanari” fetish genre.

    http://www.jlist.com/category/166

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  48. H.J.D
    November 3, 2010 at 4:10 pm

    If I wanted to see a guy get kicked in the nuts, I’d have gone to Youtube.

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  49. WhyLikeThis
    November 3, 2010 at 4:11 pm

    thanks to Regretsy i now have a slightly Orwellian reaction to the word “Erotic”
    every time i see it i expect to see something that upsets me mildly

    …case in point

    Thumb up Thumb down +26

  50. hamoza
    November 3, 2010 at 4:28 pm

    The sexual/erotic proclivities of others doesn’t faze or bother me at all as long as it’s consentual & doesn’t involve kids /animals.
    Now where’s my big hunk in a priests get up?
    Just kidding-I’m a Jewish pagan/athiest.

    Thumb up Thumb down +15

  51. sheltiepitbullfun
    November 3, 2010 at 4:54 pm

    I found the boot heel! Its the shiny spot to the left of the penis! Yay!!?

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  52. angel drawers
    November 3, 2010 at 5:01 pm

    #51, I don’t know if I’d say “yay”. That means the cock is wedged in between the heel and the sole.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  53. taffymcclure
    November 3, 2010 at 5:45 pm

    Jesus. What in the hell would happen if someone challenged this seller to produce a painting involving a puppy?

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  54. HelenaHandbasket
    November 3, 2010 at 6:02 pm

    I’ve seen the Kanye cellphone photos, and just read his quote that he was “mad that it got cut off.” This lends a whole new perspective to that revelation.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  55. razberries
    November 3, 2010 at 6:02 pm

    “I was challenged to produce a painting.”

    You were challenged, alright!

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  56. Took me a long while to identify the black thing as a foot. The heel is there, but WHAT IS THAT MUTANT FLIPPER ON THE FRONT? Is this some ‘artistic’ angle?

    The trod-upon penis is nice for the price. I can ignore the boobs. But I cannot ignore that misshapen foot-thing.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  57. Feel Free To Customise and Whimsiclise My Vagina
    November 3, 2010 at 6:31 pm

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -4

  58. mdw5666
    November 3, 2010 at 7:01 pm

    “You’ll shoot your eye out, kid!

    HO. HO. HO.”

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

  59. mtopia
    November 3, 2010 at 7:27 pm

    That is either a small foot or a very, um, girthy, penis. How does she/he buy pants?

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  60. Victoria Regina
    November 3, 2010 at 7:39 pm

    #47 As if those images were not disturbing enough, there was a whole store full of Hello Kitty products scrolling along the left side.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  61. Martha_May
    November 3, 2010 at 7:43 pm

    Are his/her nipples following anyone else around the room, or is it just me?

    Thumb up Thumb down +24

  62. Billy Goetse Gruff
    November 3, 2010 at 7:51 pm

    I’m not sure if I understand the social meaning of this piece. Perhaps if I could view it in a room?

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  63. Lissa the Somewhat Okay
    November 3, 2010 at 8:23 pm

    @GoNuts: After someone mentioned the bewbs, futinari came to my head, too. (The things I’ve seen when looking for anime pictures on Google that I can not unsee…)

    @Victoria: Aaah, the Hello Kitty vibrators? They’re cute once you forget what they’re intended for. (Remember, they’re novelty items not intended for sexual use. *wink, wink, nudge, nudge*)

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  64. terriwells
    November 3, 2010 at 8:30 pm

    I checked out her shop (artist claims female and mentions taking a pole dancing class, so I’ll grant that), and some of her work isn’t bad, in an artsy kind of way.

    But I can see why she was “challenged” to do something involving a man…leaving us kind of “challenged” looking at it. It should not have taken me as long as it did to figure out that was a penis and not a huge thumb coming out of a glove. And once I *did* figure that out, it should not have taken me as long as it did to figure out the guy was circumcized! (Didn’t notice the moobs until I read the comments and looked again).

    The phrase I’ve heard that applies in this case is “I’ve suffered for my art, and now it’s your turn.” I think she needs a lot more practice drawing penises from life, if she can get more guys to pose. *Blinks* Um, wait. Where did I put my paints…?

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  65. Holden Back
    November 3, 2010 at 8:42 pm

    It’s a porno platform shoe, people. Or a high-heeled gumboot. I’m sure both have a cachet in the shoe/foot fetish world.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  66. hunnypot
    November 4, 2010 at 1:00 am

    Proof positive that black & white doesn’t automagically make something “arty.”

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  67. Nightme
    November 4, 2010 at 2:51 am

    What? So am I the only one who saw this and thought ‘Mmmm sexy’? You people are just close-minded and don’t understand S&M! Besides, see that boot? It’s steampunk! Mmm steampunk S&M!

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  68. kittykatt
    November 4, 2010 at 2:51 am

    Am I just that twisted that I saw the platform shoe immediately??? Eeep?

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  69. Dix
    November 4, 2010 at 5:41 am

    “Will never be copied.”

    Oh, yeah? Watch me.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  70. and Stretch65 as “The Count”
    November 4, 2010 at 8:01 am

    #63 Hello Kitty vibrators aka HELLO KLITTY

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  71. laughinglurker
    November 4, 2010 at 10:37 am

    #51 Thank heavens! Not being able to see the heel was making me nuts.

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  72. humalong
    November 4, 2010 at 12:24 pm

    @#28 Bratfink :
    I think there’s a disease where a fingernail develops on a penis. I wish I could remembe3r the name……hangnail? nailhead?

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  73. nylasor
    November 4, 2010 at 2:11 pm

    @ #3 – Were you thinking of the Cocteau Twins? Her left foot probably looks the same.

    Thumb up Thumb down -1

  74. rubypony
    November 4, 2010 at 3:01 pm

    “Taken from my own photo.” Were you the cock-er or the cock-ee?

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  75. mannequinreject
    November 4, 2010 at 4:59 pm

    THAT BLACK THING KILLED TASHA YAR IN STAR TREK

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  76. Staccato the Idiot Chorus Boy
    November 5, 2010 at 10:01 am

    It will never be copied? My Chinese copyright-flouncing reproduction house begs to differ! We’re going to sell almost as many of these as the Thomas Kincaid knockoffs.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  77. Lissa the Somewhat Okay
    November 7, 2010 at 8:44 pm

    (Sorry for the late reply…Internet decided to crash. Fun times.)

    #70: You have no idea, really, how hard it is now for me to NOT say “Hello Klit-ty”.

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  78. jojezebelle
    November 18, 2010 at 7:37 am

    Hahaha I’m so proud. I did this piece when I was in a foul mood and wanted to be kicked off facebook. I posted it everywhere and got my wish. And thanks to regretsy I sold it. If I didn’t hate it as much as you all do I’d do some more the same!

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

    • Kariswen
      December 24, 2011 at 7:33 pm

      You might have saved yourself some time if you’d just snapped a picture of your snatch and posted it instead of taking the time to paint something…:P

      Thumb up Thumb down 0

  79. jojezebelle
    November 18, 2010 at 7:40 am

    And I’m so upset I can’t share it on facebook as I don’t want to be kicked off again..

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  80. Stephani
    November 30, 2010 at 10:01 pm

    first I saw the breasts. Then the dick getting stepped on by a black rain boot.

    This is what’s known as a ‘Russian Gas Pedal’
    http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=russian%20gas%20pedal

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  81. jazzbrizz
    February 6, 2011 at 5:11 am

    that ‘man’ has boobs!

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  82. KiONNic
    July 1, 2011 at 11:04 pm

    Is that Louboutins?

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

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