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Kelly is such a bitch

This is why you have to make sure the doll signs the waiver before the photo shoot.

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34 comments on Kelly is such a bitch

  1. HelenaHandbasket
    October 22, 2010 at 1:38 pm

    She looks a little queasy.

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  2. donuthole
    October 22, 2010 at 1:39 pm

    Mario Batali may not care , but even plastic dolls are embarrassed to be seen in orange crocs.

    Thumb up Thumb down +119

  3. Chrisnyc1213
    October 22, 2010 at 1:41 pm

    The family dog must have gotten to her right before that photo was taken.

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  4. knittin-kitten
    October 22, 2010 at 1:41 pm

    I read her paragraph on not violating her copyright. I don’t think she REALLY needs to worry about that happening.

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  5. raven
    October 22, 2010 at 1:42 pm

    I get it! This is a mature listing that has been censored because she has a cunt face………

    Thumb up Thumb down +15

  6. LeeLooDallas
    October 22, 2010 at 1:44 pm

    I bet she ate everything off the catering table, threw it all up and stomped off.

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  7. donuthole
    October 22, 2010 at 1:44 pm

    I realize it’s knit-picking but the 3 shades of green clash together & look like shit.

    Thumb up Thumb down +35

  8. captaincavegirl
    October 22, 2010 at 1:44 pm

    I’m not sure how to feel about the sophistication of the one-shoulder look combined with the Bo Peep-esque bloomers and hat. I need Tim Gunn’s input, stat.

    Thumb up Thumb down +38

  9. curlytopnola
    October 22, 2010 at 1:44 pm

    such AS Mattel’s Kelly. not saying this IS Mattel’s Kelly. just that if you were to ask if it SOUNDED like Mattel’s Kelly….i would have to ambiguously both nod and shake my head.
    i mean, she SAID she was 18, but i didn’t necessarily card her…

    Thumb up Thumb down +58

  10. Patty got abducted by a Steampunk Alien
    October 22, 2010 at 1:47 pm

    Maybe Kelly was disfigured in a horrible accident. She was stalked by GI Joe and he used his Kung-Fu grip to rip off her nose or something.

    Dating myself there with the GI Joe reference, aren’t I?

    Thumb up Thumb down +24

  11. LeeLooDallas
    October 22, 2010 at 1:48 pm

    Maybe she’s a cabbage patch kid.
    A very low budget cabbage patch kid.

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  12. Chrisnyc1213
    October 22, 2010 at 1:50 pm

    Is her face scratch and sniff?

    Thumb up Thumb down +37

  13. Victoria Regina
    October 22, 2010 at 1:51 pm

    There actually was a time in the late 1990′s that Mattel was vigorously patrolling the ‘net for use of their name or their product names, such as *arbie. This played havoc with all the fan and seller sites and boards and hastened the downfall of the collectibles market. I know of one merchant that was forced to change the name of her store and site. I’m sure there were others.
    That still doesn’t explain the little-green-apple-faced Kelly.

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

  14. knittin-kitten
    October 22, 2010 at 1:53 pm

    It looks like the bridesmaid dress for a Keebler elf wedding.

    Thumb up Thumb down +21

  15. LeeLooDallas
    October 22, 2010 at 1:53 pm

    “I am not unreasonable, and have been known to say yes.”

    Oh, if I had a dollar for every time I’ve said that to my husband.

    Thumb up Thumb down +49

  16. Grot – The Ghost of Reginald I Perrin
    October 22, 2010 at 2:31 pm

    Minty Fresh? Nah, Molly O’Riordan just got drunk and blew green chunks all over herself. The orange Crocs are just a sad attempt to look like an Irish flag. Just make her horizontal, if you know what I mean, guv’ner.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  17. and Stretch65 as “The Count”
    October 22, 2010 at 2:50 pm

    This doll is brillant. It can allow girls to play “Mommy is having her monthly visitor” and change the face to match Mommy’s mood

    Thumb up Thumb down -1

  18. Wilma Fingerdoo
    October 22, 2010 at 2:56 pm

    The face resembles a jar gripper. She could come in handy at parties when everyone uses her face to open their twist offs.

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  19. H.J.D
    October 22, 2010 at 3:05 pm

    The dolls have witness protection too?

    Thumb up Thumb down +15

  20. rumi monger
    October 22, 2010 at 3:25 pm

    pingpong face

    Thumb up Thumb down +17

  21. Nico
    October 22, 2010 at 4:08 pm

    I don’t like flavored doll clothing, so this is a pass for me.

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  22. mtopia
    October 22, 2010 at 6:23 pm

    I like that we are privy to the kind of candles this seller keeps on what appears to be a staircase: green and grey.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  23. Badger
    October 22, 2010 at 6:27 pm

    #19

    That’s not actually Kelly, it’s DB Cooper. Who’d ever think to look for him on Etsy?

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  24. WhyLikeThis
    October 22, 2010 at 6:47 pm

    not to (k)nitpick here, but don’t balaclavas usually have eye holes?

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  25. Clare
    October 22, 2010 at 7:09 pm

    Those witness protection people are gonna be pissed. They were very specific about her having to give up her modeling career.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  26. invaderhorizongreen
    October 22, 2010 at 8:10 pm

    lets all play guess what is behind the green blot

    i would love to see photoshop pics depicting this game

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  27. ensoul
    October 22, 2010 at 8:27 pm

    Anonymous does not forgive.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  28. punkinpie
    October 23, 2010 at 7:24 am

    Not sure, but I think this is the doll that had the jealous pet ape.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  29. Neph Sye
    October 23, 2010 at 10:09 am

    Wow, this actually looks exactly like the things my grandmother made for me to play with as a child. That explains so much.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  30. jojo
    October 23, 2010 at 2:59 pm

    That’s quite a bit of hair for such a small thing.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  31. The Blue Kraken
    October 24, 2010 at 10:10 pm

    Patty… yo joe? knowing is half the battle! :P

    doll looks like a leprechaun puked on her

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  32. AmyAngel
    October 24, 2010 at 10:28 pm

    This sort of mess is why I always have to exclude “crochet” when looking for Kelly-size clothes for my Puki. I know sewing small things is difficult, but I don’t want any of my dolls looking like my grandma’s toilet-roll cover doll either.

    Maybe she attempted to customize the face and is covering her fail?

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  33. kittykatt
    October 26, 2010 at 10:36 pm
  34. repoed2
    November 10, 2010 at 4:59 pm

    I’d be embarrassed to be wearing that thing too-what’s with the shorts?!

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

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