I’m with #6, I think the thing that disturbed me most (besides the flower tattoo) was the ‘small packaging’. Well, they do say trim it down to make ‘it’ look bigger.
Have you read the PRED manifesto? Been to Love-Shy? Read about Draco Malfoy getting skullfucked by his father (yeah, he had to make a hole first) with fecal matter for lube? Seen the pain series? Seen meatspin?
And hell, I’ve never even TOUCHED 4chan.
PS I’m fully expecting to be heavily downvoted for graphic content. Bring it on, jealous loser bitches.
The only woman who’s seen his package is his esthetician, or my name is Mamie Eisenhower.
On a side note, when I went to m-w.com to check the spelling of esthetician, the term “Retrosexual” appeared on their home page in the TOP 10: User-Submitted Words, Vol. 3. Eerie, coincidence…..
“It is true not many people ever see it” And many more who wish they hadn’t just seen it! I can’t look at his shop without bursting into a fit of laughter. That penis enhancer… it ain’t working!
If you have not yet checked out Mister G’s shop- you must do so ASAP. He’s got “male jewelry” there, but honestly, it doesn’t look handmade or vintage to me, so I’m sure Etsy admins will yank him real hard!
508: So I’m at his house- he was so sweet and sensitive at dinner. He just excused himself to “get ready” for me. This is going to be good!
617: Have fun!
508: HOLY SHIT COME GET ME NOW. I’ll meet you at the Dunkin’ Donuts on Main in about 5 minutes- I’m running down the street trying to button my top. Don’t even slow down- just open the door.
617: WTF happened?
508: Landing strip, groin flower tattoo, hung like a kitten.
617: O.O I will be RIGHT THERE
You know, basically when I see a guy’s pubic area for the first time, all I want is for all the necessary equipment to be in the right place and him to not smell clean. I do NOT want to see what’s apparently a landing strip for Air Force One.
“nice to see….” what the heck are you on why do you even THINK i want to see you nearly nude with what looks like a close encounter with the lawn mower
I have to say, after visiting the shop and seeing Mr. G string with the flower tattoo (and mole center)model other looks, that this pouch seems to have a slimming effect. The others seem to be chubbier. This one is my personal favorite: http://www.etsy.com/listing/48274963/santa-suit-for-yourlittle-man
HelenaHandbasket, that’s what bothers me the most. That he shaved an inch or so swath above his landing strip, then there’s a happy trail and a great thatch of mid-abdomen hair gone wild.
It’s almost worse than if he’d just shaved his whole body and been done with it.
I am not going back in there, so someone please tell me if I just saw a lace g-string? Also, what is the point of the “male enhancer”? To be extra disappointing?
Does he have his …package is too long a word for that… …his, er, willy… tucked behind him like that guy in Silence of the Lambs? …I can’t stop the image of Buffalo Bill dancing around with the lipstick and all…. oh help.
The thing that disturbs me most is that it’s a DVD. If the picture’s creepy, how creepy would moving images of him removing his pubic hair be? Oh god, would we see his wang too? Is there an option to pay to NOT see this video ever?
I know they say good things come in small packages but seriously, throw that one back, it’s too little to eat.
(Unless that’s some girl our ‘metrosexual’ has photographed, in which case she might want to think about removing the belly hair tooooo…but that’s not on my menu anyway, EITHER.)
He has to be a pre-op. I’m just sayin’.. No straight nor gay male would be that proud of the invisible package. Everyone should by the dvd so he can turn his outie into her innie.
What I’m having trouble with: another self involved attention seeking narcissist who swings either way selling what amounts to porn under the guise of ‘art’. Yawn. I bet if we check Craig’s List he’ll have a picture of his Wiener figured prominently for rent in a hotel somewhere near the airport in a major fashion modeling city like Tulsa or Scranton. We’ll know him by the Mangina shave job. YAWN.
Hide the salami: I don’t think it means what he think it means.
These sellers leave me so confused. On the one hand, we should celebrate what we (and all other mammals) have/do to the point of making jewelry and dishes about it. On the other, we should be shamed into making it different by way of this instructional DVD. I guess I’m old-fashioned. Every woman (and this guy) has a vagina, and hair is something all us mammals have and are supposed to have. Why the big deal over either?
Visit Regretsy: Wow he’s got a big package..oops! screen set to 200%, Visit Etsy site: love knot…Why? just why? “If you are 18 years of age or older and have a valid Etsy Account, we would be happy to supply you with more pictures of this item so you can see exactly what it looks like. Please contact me if interested”. If you search his site you can see what his “what” looks like. Finally, any man hung like a chimpmunk can always use another place to store his Pee-Nuts.
AreYouGoingToEatThatPickle
August 21, 2010 at 1:30 pm
“Metrosexual” is a pretty common term here, and it’s not necessarily a bad thing. I live about 45 minutes from downtown Toronto, so I hear guys refer to the “Metros” on Bay St (TO’s equiv. to Wall St) quite a bit.
To the person who said they hoped he was a grower not a shower… I hate to say it but I think that’s all he’s got to grow. *insert sad trombone wah-wah-waaaah sound here* (www.sadtrombone.com)
…wow.. for a minute i thought this was a womans brazilian wax job.. well not a whole minute.. i had to read the description to realize the bit of fabric there was hiding an ity bity penis … no wonder he has to trim his hair you wouldnt be able to FIND it other wise.. poor guy
Woah. His profile says he’s a 47 year-old married man. I’m not buying it–literally and figuritively. He also says he lost like 100 pounds and then became a swimsuit model. I think he also lost his sanity.
I think its obnoxious to talk about big bushes like that. Especially when one is hung like a squirrel and whomever you might lure home with you will have to struggle not to laugh when you remove your pants. Or not struggle and just laugh merrily all the way out the door.
I’m officially going to stop wondering why MY stuff never sells on Etsy. Clearly, handmade yarn cannot compete with penis costumes, custom cum rags, and DIY crotch-scaping instructions.
Not that I don’t enjoy this site, but next weekend could there not be real pubic hair with a cup o’noodles at the very top of the page? Yarn pubic hair is okay.
Please (for the love of all that is holy) get this image bumped down so I don’t have to see it in my “Top Sites” view any longer. Mr. Former Male Model and his teeny twins’ playpen are very disturbing. Thx.
V&EDD – I was getting ready for work, and decided to check Regretsy again. (I stock shelves overnight at a Super Target.) I saw your GIF and about died laughing!!!
I just happened to stock and zone the SHAVING aisle and I was laughing to myself the whole time!
yeah Skully IHPI not to mention “Dr. Shrinker” (Dr Shrinker, Dr. Shrinker – he’s a mad man with an evil landing strip) Working on a way to lower shipping costs by miniturizng cargo before shipment a scientist mis-fires his shrink ray at HIS package leaving a tiny flower shaped scar and creating his irreversible teeny weenie. Eventually His madness over this twist of fate drives him to post a manscaping video on Etsy claiming – “It looks bigger when its SHAVED”
So where did his shop go? Seriously, it’s like Regretsy is the only way to have anything removed from etsy because etsy sure as hell doesn’t listen to legit sellers. How about a reseller of the week? How much do we need to donate and to what cause because I would love for that to happen!?
Other things I’m having trouble with:
Where is his junk? My 7 year old couldn’t keep all his business in that little bag.
The sequined backdrop.
The fabric on that “bikini” It looks like my grandmothers Chez Loung
The sequined backdrop
That guy’s skinny ass! I would break him in half!
The sequined backdrop
I could go on but my brain is about to implode trying to comprehend what I’m seeing here….
When I saw this image, I laughed so hard that I fell out of my chair and started coughing uncontrollably. A few days later, I was diagnosed with a hernia. Way to go! Your site gave me a hernia from laughing too hard.
I know I’m a bit late to the show, but I just found this post. I laughed looking at it, but reading the comments sent me into such hysterics that I gave myself an asthma attack!
And I don’t have asthma!!!
(And then I was dumb enough to try to take a drink … lucky thing I still have a computer!)
August 20, 2010 at 4:35 pm
That is a dude with a landing strip. Now I have officially seen. it. all.
eye, meet fork.
August 20, 2010 at 4:36 pm
I clicked on Regretsy and it took me a few moments to realize the picture was that of a dude.
My husband walked into the room and immediately said, “Whoa! Is that a guy?!”
I’m a little more disturbed that my spouse of 24 years so quickly identified a male “area” after landscaping.
August 20, 2010 at 4:37 pm
Aaackk!! …….Gaakkk!!! …….*passes out*
August 20, 2010 at 4:37 pm
Etsy handmade. Just as the founders envisioned it.
August 20, 2010 at 4:39 pm
It took me a little to figure out this was a guy O.O
OMG I’m sorry I clicked lol
August 20, 2010 at 4:40 pm
Think he could “trim” words in that? Like phrases? Like, “No woman ever sees this EVER”?
August 20, 2010 at 4:40 pm
Wow, that is a guy? With a flower tat, and a little pouch my 8 year old grandson could probably fill? Yeah, no. I am very squicked out.
August 20, 2010 at 4:41 pm
Until I read HK’s comments I thought the flower tattoo was a mole he needs his doctor to check out.
August 20, 2010 at 4:41 pm
Jesus F Christ. Etsy’s officially gone weirder than Craigslist.
Also, I share the same eye/fork sentiments as emlemony above.
August 20, 2010 at 4:42 pm
I find it very surprising that he’s claiming to know what it’s like to be intimate with a woman…
August 20, 2010 at 4:43 pm
I was skeptical, but then he mentioned “come on men.”
10 points – HK
August 20, 2010 at 4:46 pm
I’m with #6, I think the thing that disturbed me most (besides the flower tattoo) was the ‘small packaging’. Well, they do say trim it down to make ‘it’ look bigger.
August 20, 2010 at 4:46 pm
Huh. If I proposed this idea to the manflesh – I’m pretty sure he’d be down with that. In a parallel world – maybe.
August 20, 2010 at 4:49 pm
He feels that it is important to take good care of his pubic area? Then why did he get that tattoo?
August 20, 2010 at 4:49 pm
I don’t want to correct THE Helen Killer, but personally, I would include “the tiny bathing suits he models” in the pie chart.
But maybe that’s just me having trouble with something that most Europeans do not.
August 20, 2010 at 4:50 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
August 20, 2010 at 4:50 pm
Arnold Schwarzenegger does not approve.
Jacko might.
August 20, 2010 at 4:50 pm
I’d think that the hysterical laughter of his partner would be a bit of a mood killer, myself.
August 20, 2010 at 4:52 pm
the “art” of pubic hair trimming?
i think we have now reached the end of the internet, as i have REALLY seen everything.
part 2 in his dvd series should be about vajazzling, or dickdazzling i suppose
July 1, 2011 at 1:03 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
August 20, 2010 at 4:52 pm
I am at a motherfucking LOSS after traveling the high roads of this shop. JFC.
August 20, 2010 at 4:53 pm
Since when is uncontrollable laughter what men most want to hear the moment you see their “area?”
August 20, 2010 at 4:53 pm
“Metro-sexual.” Must mean he gives hand-jobs on the subway.
August 20, 2010 at 4:54 pm
I have a problem with how small this guy’s junk must be to fit in that baby banana hammock
August 20, 2010 at 4:55 pm
Officially it’s called “penazzling”. And it’s every bit as lame as you think it is.
Can we stop pretending we’re 14 now pls and just put in hardwood floors?
August 20, 2010 at 4:55 pm
Metrosexual, my ass. This is full-flowered gay.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
July 1, 2011 at 1:05 pm
What about your ass…?
August 20, 2010 at 4:56 pm
His store…it confuses me!
August 20, 2010 at 4:56 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
August 20, 2010 at 4:57 pm
THERE
ARE
MORE
PICTURES!!
RUN AWAY! RUN FAR FAR AWAY!
August 20, 2010 at 5:00 pm
That is not ‘trimming a bush’, that is MOWING the whole dang lawn. Except for an *ahem* vanity line…
August 20, 2010 at 5:03 pm
Helen, you sure know how to start off a weekend.
August 20, 2010 at 5:03 pm
What’s the deal with this pirate I see the eye patch but where is his other eye?
August 20, 2010 at 5:04 pm
The only woman who’s seen his package is his esthetician, or my name is Mamie Eisenhower.
On a side note, when I went to m-w.com to check the spelling of esthetician, the term “Retrosexual” appeared on their home page in the TOP 10: User-Submitted Words, Vol. 3. Eerie, coincidence…..
August 20, 2010 at 5:04 pm
My chart includes the purple sequined background, too.
“Metro-sexual” my ass!
August 20, 2010 at 5:07 pm
#29, your ass is metro-sexual?! I don’t even want to know what that means.
August 20, 2010 at 5:08 pm
“It is true not many people ever see it” And many more who wish they hadn’t just seen it! I can’t look at his shop without bursting into a fit of laughter. That penis enhancer… it ain’t working!
August 20, 2010 at 5:12 pm
A. Who is this dvd for? B. When did glow in the dark cock rings become a “thing”?
August 20, 2010 at 5:16 pm
Sorry seller I like my men a bit more hirsute. The close-ups of his shaved groin made me laugh out loud. Did we really need to see that?
I will second the opinion that no woman has been near his nether regions. Or ever will.
August 20, 2010 at 5:33 pm
Ummmm his Etsy shop says “We all understand how nice it is to have a complete package” but it doesn’t look like he even has a package at all.
August 20, 2010 at 5:33 pm
Ok… I’m very sexually liberated, and have been with my share of effeminate men. I even dated a guy that was bi-sexual.
That being said, if I EVER opened a guys pants and his junk looked like this, there’s no way he’d be throwing his junk anywhere remotely near my box!
August 20, 2010 at 5:36 pm
His g-strings remind me of the Masturbating Bear’s package wrapping.
Don’t judge me.
August 20, 2010 at 5:39 pm
I feel violated.
August 20, 2010 at 5:54 pm
OMG – if I had to look at this on a guy from Gainesville, at least wear Gator colors…jeez
August 20, 2010 at 5:56 pm
If you have not yet checked out Mister G’s shop- you must do so ASAP. He’s got “male jewelry” there, but honestly, it doesn’t look handmade or vintage to me, so I’m sure Etsy admins will yank him real hard!
July 1, 2011 at 1:07 pm
They might PULL HIM OFF.
Off the site, I mean.
August 20, 2010 at 6:02 pm
508: So I’m at his house- he was so sweet and sensitive at dinner. He just excused himself to “get ready” for me. This is going to be good!
617: Have fun!
508: HOLY SHIT COME GET ME NOW. I’ll meet you at the Dunkin’ Donuts on Main in about 5 minutes- I’m running down the street trying to button my top. Don’t even slow down- just open the door.
617: WTF happened?
508: Landing strip, groin flower tattoo, hung like a kitten.
617: O.O I will be RIGHT THERE
August 20, 2010 at 6:03 pm
I looked through his store. I am now totally confused. And disturbed.
August 20, 2010 at 6:08 pm
LoriZig – if I could click the thumbs up to infinity on that one, I would. INFINITY, sez I.
August 20, 2010 at 6:16 pm
You know, basically when I see a guy’s pubic area for the first time, all I want is for all the necessary equipment to be in the right place and him to not smell clean. I do NOT want to see what’s apparently a landing strip for Air Force One.
August 20, 2010 at 6:21 pm
Honey, if Air Force One is landing there, it’s under the DADT policy guidelines.
August 20, 2010 at 6:26 pm
“nice to see….” what the heck are you on why do you even THINK i want to see you nearly nude with what looks like a close encounter with the lawn mower
August 20, 2010 at 6:29 pm
I have to say, after visiting the shop and seeing Mr. G string with the flower tattoo (and mole center)model other looks, that this pouch seems to have a slimming effect. The others seem to be chubbier. This one is my personal favorite:
http://www.etsy.com/listing/48274963/santa-suit-for-yourlittle-man
August 20, 2010 at 6:29 pm
Not sure where they took the photos but it must have been pretty cold in there.
August 20, 2010 at 6:32 pm
I was in the pool!!!!
August 20, 2010 at 6:42 pm
Call me boring, but the only thing a disembodied penis, dressed as Santa makes me want to do is convert to Judaism.
August 20, 2010 at 6:42 pm
What … the … bloody … hell …
And to think I actually want to enter the dating pool again after my divorce. Maybe I’ll just enter a convent.
August 20, 2010 at 7:01 pm
Wow. That is so many shades of wrong.
August 20, 2010 at 7:04 pm
Like a Ken doll–smooth down there.
August 20, 2010 at 7:06 pm
He seems to have shorn a detour in his (un)happy trail.
August 20, 2010 at 7:10 pm
You know what I don’t understand? After all that work getting himself just right, he didn’t even show the rest of the arrow.
August 20, 2010 at 7:20 pm
public hair
August 20, 2010 at 7:24 pm
Ahhh haaa ha!! Purple camo penis enhancer! Oh ya, he’s straight all right.
August 20, 2010 at 7:25 pm
For Skully:
The theme song to this DVD
“GUESS WHO?!…Ha ha ha ha HA
Ha ha ha ha Its the Woody Shaved pecker show”
August 20, 2010 at 7:25 pm
HelenaHandbasket, that’s what bothers me the most. That he shaved an inch or so swath above his landing strip, then there’s a happy trail and a great thatch of mid-abdomen hair gone wild.
It’s almost worse than if he’d just shaved his whole body and been done with it.
July 1, 2011 at 1:10 pm
No, it IS worse. Shave his whole body, I could live with that, but this is just sloppy.
August 20, 2010 at 7:37 pm
GUESS WHAT!?! I FOUND HIS OTHER HAIR!!!
August 20, 2010 at 7:42 pm
The fact that he included a picture highlighting the shaved base of his penis really speaks volumes.
I hope he’s got an oil drum full of Calamine lotion because that’s going to itch like hell.
August 20, 2010 at 7:45 pm
I am not going back in there, so someone please tell me if I just saw a lace g-string? Also, what is the point of the “male enhancer”? To be extra disappointing?
August 20, 2010 at 7:47 pm
I need to know if this fall in handmade, vintage or supplies?
August 20, 2010 at 7:49 pm
Oh Jesus:
http://www.etsy.com/listing/51228028/custom-embroidered-sex-cleanup-rag
I want the one that just says “CUM RAG” so I’ll stop wiping my face with the wrong towel.
August 20, 2010 at 7:54 pm
“Come on men, we have all either had the chance to deal with a big BUSH in our lifetime!”
…or?!?! unlike his junk, we’re left hanging!
August 20, 2010 at 7:59 pm
Where’s the beef?
August 20, 2010 at 8:04 pm
Damn that chick has a hairy belly.
August 20, 2010 at 8:04 pm
I’m just completely disturbed. Men should not have little baby pouches on their penises. It’s just wrong.
August 20, 2010 at 8:27 pm
#38 and he removed all the packing material…
Razor burn is bad enough from kissing – do you really want it from giving head?
August 20, 2010 at 8:29 pm
http://www.etsy.com/listing/48941477/green-see-thru-mesh-male-g-string-thong
Wow, Santa suits for your shlong and glow in the dark cock rings specials! Etsy sellers continues to amaze me.
August 20, 2010 at 8:30 pm
Does he have his …package is too long a word for that… …his, er, willy… tucked behind him like that guy in Silence of the Lambs? …I can’t stop the image of Buffalo Bill dancing around with the lipstick and all…. oh help.
August 20, 2010 at 8:30 pm
The thing that disturbs me most is that it’s a DVD. If the picture’s creepy, how creepy would moving images of him removing his pubic hair be? Oh god, would we see his wang too? Is there an option to pay to NOT see this video ever?
August 20, 2010 at 8:39 pm
I know they say good things come in small packages but seriously, throw that one back, it’s too little to eat.
(Unless that’s some girl our ‘metrosexual’ has photographed, in which case she might want to think about removing the belly hair tooooo…but that’s not on my menu anyway, EITHER.)
August 20, 2010 at 8:51 pm
He has to be a pre-op. I’m just sayin’.. No straight nor gay male would be that proud of the invisible package. Everyone should by the dvd so he can turn his outie into her innie.
August 20, 2010 at 9:12 pm
Notice the war wound on his hand? Them metro-pubes fight back something awful.
August 20, 2010 at 9:45 pm
Sweet I was wondering what to get my Nana for Christmas. Oh wait its for dudes? Never mind I’ll look for something else.
August 20, 2010 at 9:52 pm
Suda: It falls under the “don’t ask, don’t tell and whatever you do DONT SHOW ME policy
August 20, 2010 at 9:56 pm
This seems to be less about how to trim pubic hair & more about him ranting about women’s genitals.
The DVD probably shows grimacing whenever he mentions anything remotely vaginal.
August 20, 2010 at 10:02 pm
Two similar words – total opposites:
VAGINAL and VIRGINAL
it may be time for me to put down the regretsy pope for the night
August 20, 2010 at 11:30 pm
Who needs to buy The Art of Pubic Hair DVD when you can check out a book from the library:
http://i985.photobucket.com/albums/ae338/grinreaper1965/bob.jpg
August 20, 2010 at 11:58 pm
The closeups! Oh dear baby jesus on a cracker, the CLOSEUPS!! *uncontrollable sobbing*
August 21, 2010 at 12:02 am
#62 WhimsyMistress: You mean:
GUESS WHAT I FOUND HIS OTHER HAIR!
http://www.etsy.com/listing/48011860/hand-made-lifelike-penis-statue-one-of-a
August 21, 2010 at 12:28 am
uh. you guys saw his dick, right?
http://www.etsy.com/listing/49724109/bold-black-male-penis-enhancer-cockring
August 21, 2010 at 12:45 am
Oh god, I feel like it’s WATCHING me.
August 21, 2010 at 1:39 am
I’m hoping for his sake he’s a grow-er not a show-er. The store makes me feel he needs skills to fall back on.
August 21, 2010 at 4:50 am
I thought at first it was a twattoo.
http://gawker.com/5617400/please-call-your-vagina-tattoo-a-twattoo-not-a-vatoo
August 21, 2010 at 5:01 am
Not Vagoo approved. >:(
August 21, 2010 at 6:00 am
Uh! A buried penis.
Now I understand why there’s a flower.
August 21, 2010 at 7:35 am
@ 81: It’s like an acorn sitting atop two balls.
Someone needs to tell him that shaving isn’t going to help that look any bigger. You can’t turn a smurf into a baby.
August 21, 2010 at 7:48 am
Oh look its a Baby Sock
August 21, 2010 at 7:56 am
His merkin has a mohawk!
I’m afraid that the tattoo makes the mole look vastly more gross & disturbing
August 21, 2010 at 8:28 am
Every time I look at this I for a second I think that stupid tattoo is a hickey. Which is just icky.
August 21, 2010 at 10:08 am
What I’m having trouble with: another self involved attention seeking narcissist who swings either way selling what amounts to porn under the guise of ‘art’. Yawn. I bet if we check Craig’s List he’ll have a picture of his Wiener figured prominently for rent in a hotel somewhere near the airport in a major fashion modeling city like Tulsa or Scranton. We’ll know him by the Mangina shave job. YAWN.
August 21, 2010 at 10:57 am
How about some Elijah “Wood”?
http://www.flickr.com/photos/13893150@N02/4913755958/
August 21, 2010 at 11:27 am
Hide the salami: I don’t think it means what he think it means.
These sellers leave me so confused. On the one hand, we should celebrate what we (and all other mammals) have/do to the point of making jewelry and dishes about it. On the other, we should be shamed into making it different by way of this instructional DVD. I guess I’m old-fashioned. Every woman (and this guy) has a vagina, and hair is something all us mammals have and are supposed to have. Why the big deal over either?
August 21, 2010 at 11:33 am
Also: “Put your money where your pubes are” makes me think Scott Tennerman.
August 21, 2010 at 11:34 am
This is like one of those “cross your eyes and see an image” pictures to me.
If you blur your eyes, doesn’t his landing strip make his.. uh… happy area, look like a vagina?
I agree with #77.
He’s definitely saving for his operation, as this is just wishful thinking.
August 21, 2010 at 11:37 am
Visit Regretsy: Wow he’s got a big package..oops! screen set to 200%, Visit Etsy site: love knot…Why? just why? “If you are 18 years of age or older and have a valid Etsy Account, we would be happy to supply you with more pictures of this item so you can see exactly what it looks like. Please contact me if interested”. If you search his site you can see what his “what” looks like. Finally, any man hung like a chimpmunk can always use another place to store his Pee-Nuts.
August 21, 2010 at 11:37 am
1) is that a dude? where is he?
2) what is metro-sexual? you do it on the subway? i would google but i am scared…
August 21, 2010 at 12:06 pm
Goddamn it #74! This douche has got “Goodbye Horses” stuck in my head and you get to make the first snarky Lambs comment.
Would you do me? I’d do me…
But Chris Griffin did it better, and could fill the g-string.
August 21, 2010 at 1:30 pm
“Metrosexual” is a pretty common term here, and it’s not necessarily a bad thing. I live about 45 minutes from downtown Toronto, so I hear guys refer to the “Metros” on Bay St (TO’s equiv. to Wall St) quite a bit.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=metrosexual
Bad thing or not, I’ll take a hunky blue collar guy that leaves his stubble in the sink over a well dressed charmer with a groin like that any day.
August 21, 2010 at 4:11 pm
@#46 madeitwithmyfeet – Ha! Thanks!
To the person who said they hoped he was a grower not a shower… I hate to say it but I think that’s all he’s got to grow. *insert sad trombone wah-wah-waaaah sound here* (www.sadtrombone.com)
August 21, 2010 at 5:36 pm
…wow.. for a minute i thought this was a womans brazilian wax job.. well not a whole minute.. i had to read the description to realize the bit of fabric there was hiding an ity bity penis … no wonder he has to trim his hair you wouldnt be able to FIND it other wise.. poor guy
and im with #98
August 21, 2010 at 6:00 pm
There’s nothing left!
August 21, 2010 at 6:17 pm
I think that razor was a bit too sharp!
August 21, 2010 at 6:40 pm
Woah. His profile says he’s a 47 year-old married man. I’m not buying it–literally and figuritively. He also says he lost like 100 pounds and then became a swimsuit model. I think he also lost his sanity.
August 21, 2010 at 8:42 pm
Ladies, gentlemen, lactating badgers – I give you Saturday Night Fuckery:
August 21, 2010 at 8:56 pm
I want the DVD that teaches me the art of shaving “James came here”. I mean, why would I commit to a towel?
August 21, 2010 at 9:25 pm
Why are some of his close ups obscured, but Santa Dick is displayed in all of its diminutive, goose-fleshed glory?
August 21, 2010 at 9:28 pm
#67
Etsy sells freaking cum rags. Embroidered cum rags for glowing, Santa suit clad baby dicks. Why do I still have a shop there, why?
August 22, 2010 at 3:06 am
No worries about having sex with women whose “bush” is too big for your tastes. You won’t be scoring any with your band aid strip.
August 22, 2010 at 3:10 am
If you need a video with shaving instructions, you shouldn’t be trying to shave ANYTHING down there.
August 22, 2010 at 10:37 am
#61 Stretch65: LOL! This reminded me of the 70′s cartoon “Inch High Private One-Eye.”
#110 VEDD: Awesome SNF!
August 22, 2010 at 11:03 am
I think its obnoxious to talk about big bushes like that. Especially when one is hung like a squirrel and whomever you might lure home with you will have to struggle not to laugh when you remove your pants. Or not struggle and just laugh merrily all the way out the door.
August 22, 2010 at 11:52 am
Check out the Santa costume in the sellers other items if you haven’t already! It takes “cock in a box” to a whole new level!
August 22, 2010 at 1:42 pm
I’m officially going to stop wondering why MY stuff never sells on Etsy. Clearly, handmade yarn cannot compete with penis costumes, custom cum rags, and DIY crotch-scaping instructions.
August 22, 2010 at 1:57 pm
Not that I don’t enjoy this site, but next weekend could there not be real pubic hair with a cup o’noodles at the very top of the page? Yarn pubic hair is okay.
August 22, 2010 at 7:41 pm
can we please post something new…every time I check in here I feel like I’m going to throw up.
August 22, 2010 at 10:44 pm
Please (for the love of all that is holy) get this image bumped down so I don’t have to see it in my “Top Sites” view any longer. Mr. Former Male Model and his teeny twins’ playpen are very disturbing. Thx.
August 22, 2010 at 10:49 pm
Well, this happened:
July 1, 2011 at 1:14 pm
Photobucket TOSsed it. Pretty good indicator that the image was awesome.
August 23, 2010 at 2:05 am
Dang! The things you miss ’cause of the time difference.
Thanks Regretsy what a fabulous way to start my Monday morning.
I’m having fun imagining that what we’re seeing is the shaft (no pun intended) of an arrow. That would be pubes with a sense of humour.
Have a great day!
August 23, 2010 at 3:16 am
I didn’t check this for most of the weekend and I popped back over to see how things were going and damn near snorted Mountain Dew through my nose.
This has got to be the best start to a week, ever.
V&EDD, I would bow to your skills, but I’m a little scared to take my eyes off that animation.
August 23, 2010 at 3:53 am
V&EDD – I was getting ready for work, and decided to check Regretsy again. (I stock shelves overnight at a Super Target.) I saw your GIF and about died laughing!!!
I just happened to stock and zone the SHAVING aisle and I was laughing to myself the whole time!
God I love Regretsy.
August 23, 2010 at 3:55 am
AND I love all of you crazy, awesome fuckers.
August 23, 2010 at 7:13 am
I showed this to the husband last night. Haven’t seen him flinch like that since the fat cat jumped into his lap from a high shelf.
August 23, 2010 at 8:30 am
yeah Skully IHPI not to mention “Dr. Shrinker” (Dr Shrinker, Dr. Shrinker – he’s a mad man with an evil landing strip) Working on a way to lower shipping costs by miniturizng cargo before shipment a scientist mis-fires his shrink ray at HIS package leaving a tiny flower shaped scar and creating his irreversible teeny weenie. Eventually His madness over this twist of fate drives him to post a manscaping video on Etsy claiming – “It looks bigger when its SHAVED”
August 23, 2010 at 8:49 am
So where did his shop go? Seriously, it’s like Regretsy is the only way to have anything removed from etsy because etsy sure as hell doesn’t listen to legit sellers. How about a reseller of the week? How much do we need to donate and to what cause because I would love for that to happen!?
August 23, 2010 at 8:51 am
Nevermind. Only the listing is missing, not the shop.
July 1, 2011 at 1:15 pm
ALL the listing that people have linked to seem to be missing.
August 23, 2010 at 8:58 am
VEDD I am, once again, in awe of you and your superhero talents!
I do have one request. Could something else be posted please? This is giving me the heeby-jeebies. No man’s groin should be this manicured.
I second Naveedees ‘I love all you crazy, awesome F*^%4#$@’. You guys are the best!
August 23, 2010 at 10:59 am
Wow! Thats the second smallest dick I’ve ever seen! (On a grown man)
ps. Last picture= scrotum mole http://www.etsy.com/listing/51881725/silver-glans-ring-and-cockring-combo
August 23, 2010 at 12:41 pm
I just hope that the cockrings sold are not the ones in the pictures. Also, I wanna see V&EDD’s animation. Photobucket doesn’t like it.
August 23, 2010 at 1:44 pm
I think there are 2 things wrong with this map:
1. The “crafter” used this for her map of the United States:
http://www-personal.umich.edu/~mejn/election/2008/stateelecredblue1024.png
(that’s a “weighted” map based on electoral votes or population- I don’t remember)
and 2: She totally botched her 1/4″ seam allowance
August 23, 2010 at 3:12 pm
#135 Buzzkill To Teenagers who think they are Steampunk :
So that’s what the shaved area is, a map of the number of his erectoral votes.
(but he really shouldn’t vote for himself)
August 26, 2010 at 7:01 am
Other things I’m having trouble with:
Where is his junk? My 7 year old couldn’t keep all his business in that little bag.
The sequined backdrop.
The fabric on that “bikini” It looks like my grandmothers Chez Loung
The sequined backdrop
That guy’s skinny ass! I would break him in half!
The sequined backdrop
I could go on but my brain is about to implode trying to comprehend what I’m seeing here….
September 1, 2010 at 11:42 am
That can barely fit anything.
September 3, 2010 at 7:58 am
http://images.regretsy.com/inchworm.gif
When I saw this image, I laughed so hard that I fell out of my chair and started coughing uncontrollably. A few days later, I was diagnosed with a hernia. Way to go! Your site gave me a hernia from laughing too hard.
April 12, 2011 at 11:36 pm
I know I’m a bit late to the show, but I just found this post. I laughed looking at it, but reading the comments sent me into such hysterics that I gave myself an asthma attack!
And I don’t have asthma!!!
(And then I was dumb enough to try to take a drink … lucky thing I still have a computer!)
April 13, 2011 at 9:39 am
He REALLY likes to ride the train…
July 1, 2011 at 12:12 am
Awww, it’s a gherkin hammock.
October 26, 2011 at 10:31 am
I was so relieved to realize this was a male and not a female who would mow her lady garden but not her stomach.
January 28, 2012 at 3:25 pm
Do you get a free “gherkin hammock” (thanks trel for that term) with your DVD?
I can see the idea but the pictorial execution leaves me apprehensive.