Regretsy Featured Seller Award
Today I am announcing a new feature: the Regretsy Featured Seller Award! Why should Etsy be the only place where everybody gets a trophy?
The first Regretsy Featured Seller Award goes to Etsy seller Myjewelryrewards, for outstanding achievement in store photography. There really is almost too much to choose from, but here are some of my favorites.
Here is your award!
Make sure you also add the button to your Etsy store.
Congratulations!
August 11, 2010 at 4:34 pm
I must be allergic to the base metal she uses-this store is giving me a headache.
August 11, 2010 at 4:34 pm
Will the fuckery never end?! I sure hope not!
August 11, 2010 at 4:35 pm
@Helena: Key word there might be “base”.
August 11, 2010 at 4:35 pm
I first looked at this on my phone and then I figured I would look at it from my computer because it couldn’t be that bad. Not much difference, I feel like I need my eyes checked now!
August 11, 2010 at 4:36 pm
See.. THAT’S what everything looks like when i’m not wearing my contacts.
August 11, 2010 at 4:36 pm
Reminds me of my wedding photos.
Grandma, is that you?
August 11, 2010 at 4:37 pm
I love it. I only wish that my photography could be as fine as this.
August 11, 2010 at 4:38 pm
Bahahahahaha! Thanks Regretsy, maybe less than stellar pics are no longer going to excuse my procrastinating in opening an Etsy shop.
I suddenly feel like Cartier Bresson……
August 11, 2010 at 4:38 pm
@Leftfoot: Good point. It might look better if I take off my glasses.
Err.
Nope.
August 11, 2010 at 4:40 pm
Well, that’s why your sales have stalled.
August 11, 2010 at 4:43 pm
#1 HelenaHandbasket : Me too. Sort of motion sick with a touch of brain owie.
August 11, 2010 at 4:45 pm
My ancient Motorola Razr can take better photos than those.
August 11, 2010 at 4:46 pm
That seriously makes my eyes hurt.
August 11, 2010 at 4:46 pm
Clever seller, when you receive the item, you are stoked that it is better than it looked online–or are you?
August 11, 2010 at 4:47 pm
Seebiscuit? No, I can’t.
August 11, 2010 at 4:48 pm
I can’t even tell what that 5th one is. She should just re-market it as a photographic print. Then she’d make the front page, for sure!
August 11, 2010 at 4:51 pm
C’mon you guys-finally we have steampunked photography-taken from a dirigible during a tornado, with the camera behind the goggle lens.
Give her some credit!
August 11, 2010 at 4:53 pm
Mary Haines, is that you?
I’m confused here. My digital camera has an autofocus on it. Most do, according to my tech savvy friend. He said, it’s so easy, a monkey could get a good picture with this camera.
How, exactly, do you take a photo this bad, put it on the computer, look at it, ok it, and then post it? How?????
Perhaps they should let their reborn monkey babies take the pictures. They might have better luck.
August 11, 2010 at 4:55 pm
This is the visual equivalent of a slurpee headache. I can feel my right eye beginning to twitch.
August 11, 2010 at 4:58 pm
Hmm…I think this person is a reseller?
For a reseller, you would think they would be “smart” enough to use photos from other websites. Pretty sneaky taking blurry crappy photos so everything looks “handmade”
August 11, 2010 at 5:00 pm
Mr. Magoo has opened up shop on etsy?!
August 11, 2010 at 5:00 pm
People really don’t know what a macro lens is, and when their camera does not have one.
@knitten-kitten, it’s not a lack of auto focus it’s that most camera lenses do not focus on objects close to the lens, unless they are equipped with a macro lens.
Many point and shoot cameras do have these, but you have to be using the right end of the zoom, be zoomed in usually. They are common enough, that many people assume their camera has one, but some cheapies don’t
August 11, 2010 at 5:01 pm
I can see them perfectly clearly
You have to slightly cross your eyes and let them go unfocused
though i don’t understand why they’re selling a dolphin, a peace sign, a dragon in front of a castle, a sailboat and a duck holding an umbrella.
it’s a mystery
August 11, 2010 at 5:01 pm
Here’s why I think she/he’s a reseller-
http://www.etsy.com/listing/52586330/turquoise-sunset-drops
check out the item description!
August 11, 2010 at 5:04 pm
I can see I’ll need a lot more dedication and focus if I ever want to win a Regretsy award.
August 11, 2010 at 5:05 pm
https://shops.godaddy.com/My-Jewelry-Rewards/
looky here- they also have a godaddy shop…hmm, no mention of them making their stuff by hand (or foot)
August 11, 2010 at 5:07 pm
hmm, and a 13 dollar price hike on godaddy!
make sure to shop at her esty shop, not the godaddy site…LOL
August 11, 2010 at 5:07 pm
@21 WhyLikeThis: Dangit! I never could see those Magic Eye pictures!
August 11, 2010 at 5:07 pm
http://www.etsy.com/listing/52586330/turquoise-sunset-drops
-or-
https://shops.godaddy.com/My-Jewelry-Rewards/Turquoise-Sunset-Hoop-earrings/?plv=false
August 11, 2010 at 5:12 pm
I love shit like this. It makes me feel less like an “amateur photographer” and more like “PHOTOGRAPHY GODDESS!!!” because, mother-fuck-it, I AM!
Even my worst has never looked this bad.
August 11, 2010 at 5:12 pm
@23 Whimsicalisthenics: No, apparently you need LESS. Hee.
August 11, 2010 at 5:15 pm
Etsy will let anybody into their Bridle category.
August 11, 2010 at 5:26 pm
Ouch!! I mean congratulations!!!! Had a six pack and everything is much clearer.
August 11, 2010 at 5:29 pm
OK, so I’ve run that 5th one through some very complicated, cutting-edge forensic analysis filters, and I think I’ve discovered the equestrian item in question:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/slipstreamblue/4883951848/
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHHHAHHAHAHHAHHA – HK
August 11, 2010 at 5:51 pm
I’ve seen clearer pictures of UFOs.
August 11, 2010 at 6:00 pm
Seconded, Pantsmonkey! Bwahaha!
August 11, 2010 at 6:15 pm
pantsmonkey! I laughed out loud! Genius, sheer, unadulterated, genius!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
August 11, 2010 at 6:25 pm
Um. Thirded, I guess, PM…the Queen has spoken.
August 11, 2010 at 7:01 pm
My eyes! Gah! I’m blind!
August 11, 2010 at 7:54 pm
Just the thought of you,
Turns my whole world,
A misty blue.
If you squint your eyes a certain way on that last one you can see a sasquash.
August 11, 2010 at 8:15 pm
@LeeLoo-By no means are you limited to -but you’re the PUN QUEEN BOMB!
August 11, 2010 at 8:26 pm
Hey, cut her some slack. Horses are hard to photograph well; they run so fast.
August 11, 2010 at 8:46 pm
I think that might be a goatse pendant and not a horse. If you have a few drinks, huff some glue and squint you can clearly see it.
August 11, 2010 at 8:50 pm
no no, people, this isn’t bad photography, it’s the classic Elizabeth Taylor “I’m not really that old looking” trick….except with bad jewels instead of wrinkles…
August 11, 2010 at 8:58 pm
I’m convinced LeeLooDallas is one of April’s alias’.
August 11, 2010 at 10:46 pm
The third one… I think it’s supposed to be a horse’s head on a horseshoe, but it looks like a tiny toad on a tiny Boogie Board.
August 11, 2010 at 11:20 pm
: D You guys….
August 12, 2010 at 12:43 am
At first I thought it was one gin & tonic too many.
Brava Myjewelryrewards for the great achievement, this must be such a proud moment for you.
August 12, 2010 at 12:48 am
Holy crap #34pants monkey, i almost choked on my lime. too funny.
August 12, 2010 at 4:30 am
Proof that drinking and listing DO NOT mix…..
August 12, 2010 at 4:51 am
maybe it’s her form of ” artistic expresion”. She photgraphs her items through a $2.99 key fob mini digital camera covered in vaseline.
August 12, 2010 at 4:52 am
My ass took better photos with my cell phone when I sat on it…
August 12, 2010 at 6:51 am
When your vision is fucked up, your photos tend to look as blurry as your reality.
Buy some damned glasses and a tripod.
August 12, 2010 at 7:11 am
That’s awesome. I never thought a virtual grab bag would ever be possible.
August 12, 2010 at 8:13 am
this is my favorite.
http://www.etsy.com/listing/49669650/carmina-crystal-pendant-28mm
It could be anything. A necklace or an oyster shell or a burnt spoon or a relief map of Antarctica or literally nothing. That is most definitely $2.80 worth of excitement, right there.
August 12, 2010 at 8:47 am
@ #55 lisa_n –
maybe it’s a picture of the live feed of the BP oil spill
or
maybe james cameron is making a titanic 2 and this is the opening credits.
August 12, 2010 at 9:15 am
0 sales.
August 12, 2010 at 9:59 am
This is somehow a worse offense to me than making a fake vampire baby doll.
August 12, 2010 at 10:15 am
Looks like someone forgot to clean the lens of their cell phone camera. I had something like this happen with one of my ebay pictures, but I was able to figure out what was wrong relatively quickly before I got to the “post on ebay” stage.
August 12, 2010 at 10:53 am
I can’t even focus on this to really look at it. Gives me vertigo.
August 12, 2010 at 11:39 am
I need to find the Etsy dispensary and get some Medical cannabis. These pictures confirm I am having a Glacoma flare-up.
August 12, 2010 at 11:44 am
Now everything in the store is gone and blank.
Witness the power of Regretsy and “All Praise the Cosmic Yak”
August 12, 2010 at 12:17 pm
Holy shit, that was awesome detective work, Razberries and Pants Monkey!
VIIAR for #21 fetaby:
http://i985.photobucket.com/albums/ae338/grinreaper1965/magoo.jpg
August 12, 2010 at 3:34 pm
^ Love it.
August 12, 2010 at 7:41 pm
It is a store no more!
August 12, 2010 at 7:42 pm
Or, it is now quite empty of blurry product.
August 15, 2010 at 6:28 pm
Oh my gosh, I sat here forever staring at the computer waiting for the photos to “load”, thinking they were really huge & would come into focus soon. Wow, nice job!
August 16, 2010 at 11:56 am
His/her “new” name in the Go Daddy shop is “Accent Career Apparel.” What a fucking winning name. Makes me think of royal blue skirt-suits with gigantic shoulder pads and big gold buttons. Shop announcement: “We offer top quality career apparel and accessories, 4 him and her,.Designer plus size garments, discount prices. Valuable free gifts with purchase.”
August 16, 2010 at 11:57 am
^^^ https://shops.godaddy.com/My-Jewelry-Rewards/
August 28, 2010 at 2:04 pm
the fifth one downs looks like one of those UFO Roswell photos.
October 12, 2010 at 7:57 pm
Oh, looking back through old Regretsy posts, I’m so proud to say I found and submitted this! ;D
June 28, 2011 at 6:32 pm
WTF I was just going through old posts and was about to announce my overwhelming pride at submitting the horse head pendant to April… I thought it was truly amusing due to the item description stating it had great detail… But you beat me to it you trolly troll… Or perhaps people can look at the same listings, I’ve heard of such things happening before.