OK How does Killer do it?!
She sees an Etsy posting for ugly Barbie clothes and matches it up with what Mrs Roper was wearing (Sra Roper’s ropas in Spanish) in the Three’s CoMpany season 2 opening credits from 1977!!! IMPRESSIVE
I took a look at the outfit and went, huh, that reminds me of my mother, circa the late 70′s, bleached bouffant hairdo et al. Then I scrolled down and saw that Mrs. Roper wore it too.
I don’t know what embarrasses me more, that my mother and Mrs. Roper had the same taste in caftans, or that my mother was still sporting a bouffant in the late 70′s.
Possible accessories include:
-a bottle of hydrocodone
-long acrylic nails in a neon color
-a fetish for Barry Manilow
-leopard print slippers
-dentures
-a shrinking sense of self worth
-Goldbond
-a pack of Virginia Slims (menthol optional)
-saggy granny panties and a poorly fitting bra
-a box set of a 70′s television of your choice on VHS
-bifocals with crystal frames
I grew up in the 1970s. My Barbie had clothes that looked like that back then.
With go-go boots.
And shorter.
And sluttier.
I hated Barbie. She couldn’t ride a horse like my Lone Ranger and Tonto dolls. So I usually made her the horse thief and you know what they did to horse thieves back when the “Old West” was just “the West”…
Could someone please explain the appeal of Barbie to me?
(My mother bought one for me but I immediately tore the sleeves off her shirt, gave her a couple of tattoos with my felt pens, and cut her hair. Probably best to not give a Barbie to a three year old who wants to be a pirate.)
I loved Barbie as a girl. I played with her into well into my teens and no, I did not develop an eating disorder and I am a card carrying feminist so go figure.
But my Barbies wore evening gowns and sexy little dresses and heels even when doing the most mundane things around the house and were never, ever seen in a Bepto Bismal nightmare like this.
I’d like the sleeved version of the vest, please–I believe that’s called a coat, possibly a cardigan or shirt depending on length and closure ability.
Honestly, though, she kind of looks like “I work for Girly Wal-Mart Barbie.” I expect her to turn around and her vest say, “Hi! How can I help you today?” And she has a pricing gun shoved into one pocket and a walkie-talkie in the other.
Feet on women are icky. Unfeminine and disgusting, especially if they’re anything over a size 6 and/or don’t have high arches.
When I was 11, I read Pearl S. Buck’s “The Good Earth”. In it, the chinese peasant girl hated her “big, flat, peasant feet”. She wanted to have bound feet like the upper-class girls. It was exactly how I felt about MY feet! What can I say, it was an epiphany.
Is this what happens to Barbie after Ken dumps her leaving her with 5 kids? Her hair looks like hell. She’s dressing like grandma. Amazingly even with all she has gone through she still has that beautiful smile! Poor thing, I think she needs some Zoloft.
What the heck happen to Ken’s hair? I think I get it. Ken dumps Barbie for a 20 something babe. She tires of him fast, leaving him shattered and broken.
When Barbie won’t take him back Ken turns to a life of drugs and alcohol. Soon Ken calls a cardboard box his condo. His day job is begging for coins on city streets with the hope that his famous smile will earn him a couple bucks a day.
How great is it this seller uses fake-tanned Barbie and Ken dolls who look like they’re enjoying a shopping trip to the local Salvation Army, nursing Sunday hangovers in Zubaz or posing (out-of-focus) in a sweater grandma made? This is like “What Not to Wear” for Barbies, and I cannot look away.
#43 craftycoug :
“Ken’s formalwear is something else, complete w/ neck brace and pajama bottoms!”
It’s actually Ken’s “suit for bringing suit”, when you need $$$ & just have to go to court.
When you need to showcase your bad whiplash from the rear-end collision, or when you’re trying to show your employer’s negligence for slipping & falling @ work& injuring your back – this is the outfit to do it in. Guaranteed to increase your settlement $$$.
July 28, 2010 at 5:42 pm
Wow! I’ve always wanted to dress my Barbies like grandma!
July 28, 2010 at 5:42 pm
come and knock on our door!
July 28, 2010 at 5:44 pm
**Negative Body Image Not Included**
July 28, 2010 at 5:45 pm
Sometimes you just want your Barbie to look like that lady who stands around and smokes outside the DMV.
July 28, 2010 at 5:46 pm
She’s keyed into her target market. Tweens play with Bratz dolls, perimenopausals dress up Barbie as the cool hipster they were.
July 28, 2010 at 5:48 pm
If only Barbie had that perm…
But Larry, Jack Tripper’s delightfully hairy friend, would still hit that.
July 28, 2010 at 5:51 pm
It would be more realistic if she was in her Barbie Corvette, pulling out of the House of Ribs, with BBQ stains down the front of her rack.
July 28, 2010 at 5:55 pm
#6 you’ve just made me realize that Quagmire from Family Guy is a modern day Larry Dallas.
July 28, 2010 at 6:03 pm
Wow – if that’s the blonde’s outfit, imagine what the brainy, dowdy one wears.
July 28, 2010 at 6:04 pm
isn’t a vest sleeveless by definition?
July 28, 2010 at 6:06 pm
Where would one get the fabric to replicate that? Do they sell Audra Lindley fabric somewhere?
July 28, 2010 at 6:10 pm
Come and knock on our door…..hahah…why do I relate to Mrs.Roper now a days? Oh poop I’m old….
July 28, 2010 at 6:12 pm
OK How does Killer do it?!
She sees an Etsy posting for ugly Barbie clothes and matches it up with what Mrs Roper was wearing (Sra Roper’s ropas in Spanish) in the Three’s CoMpany season 2 opening credits from 1977!!! IMPRESSIVE
July 28, 2010 at 6:21 pm
speechless.
July 28, 2010 at 6:22 pm
because April can assimilate all our perfections into her own. resistance is futile.
July 28, 2010 at 6:26 pm
I took a look at the outfit and went, huh, that reminds me of my mother, circa the late 70′s, bleached bouffant hairdo et al. Then I scrolled down and saw that Mrs. Roper wore it too.
I don’t know what embarrasses me more, that my mother and Mrs. Roper had the same taste in caftans, or that my mother was still sporting a bouffant in the late 70′s.
July 28, 2010 at 6:28 pm
#13Stretch: I think it’s more a case of Level 100 Photoshop skills. Awesome job for sure!
July 28, 2010 at 6:29 pm
Possible accessories include:
-a bottle of hydrocodone
-long acrylic nails in a neon color
-a fetish for Barry Manilow
-leopard print slippers
-dentures
-a shrinking sense of self worth
-Goldbond
-a pack of Virginia Slims (menthol optional)
-saggy granny panties and a poorly fitting bra
-a box set of a 70′s television of your choice on VHS
-bifocals with crystal frames
July 28, 2010 at 6:31 pm
I grew up in the 1970s. My Barbie had clothes that looked like that back then.
With go-go boots.
And shorter.
And sluttier.
I hated Barbie. She couldn’t ride a horse like my Lone Ranger and Tonto dolls. So I usually made her the horse thief and you know what they did to horse thieves back when the “Old West” was just “the West”…
July 28, 2010 at 6:32 pm
Perfect for those balmy evenings out on the lanai!
July 28, 2010 at 6:35 pm
Could someone please explain the appeal of Barbie to me?
(My mother bought one for me but I immediately tore the sleeves off her shirt, gave her a couple of tattoos with my felt pens, and cut her hair. Probably best to not give a Barbie to a three year old who wants to be a pirate.)
July 28, 2010 at 6:46 pm
Besides dressing like Mrs. Roper, Barbie looks eerily similar to Magda from “There’s Something About Mary”…that tan is luggage material
July 28, 2010 at 6:50 pm
#17 no bleach in your eye. you are the sharpest pen in that drunk Spanish t-shirt guy’s box:
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_9g1xXeNqBDQ/S652eVDsK5I/AAAAAAAARho/VqnwKF_vL94/s400/AudraLindley4.jpg
July 28, 2010 at 7:19 pm
Maude’s Sluttier Friend Barbie (TM)
July 28, 2010 at 7:23 pm
LOL!! I can’t believe it! That’s EXACTLY Mrs Roper!! (Think that outfit will make Ken NEVER want to get it on with Barbie…?)
July 28, 2010 at 7:24 pm
I loved Barbie as a girl. I played with her into well into my teens and no, I did not develop an eating disorder and I am a card carrying feminist so go figure.
But my Barbies wore evening gowns and sexy little dresses and heels even when doing the most mundane things around the house and were never, ever seen in a Bepto Bismal nightmare like this.
July 28, 2010 at 7:42 pm
Damn, where are Barbie’s feet?
July 28, 2010 at 7:52 pm
…and then there’s Maude!
http://cache.boston.com/resize/bonzai-fba/Globe_Photo/2009/09/14/1252975184_4015/539w.jpg
July 28, 2010 at 7:52 pm
I’d like the sleeved version of the vest, please–I believe that’s called a coat, possibly a cardigan or shirt depending on length and closure ability.
Honestly, though, she kind of looks like “I work for Girly Wal-Mart Barbie.” I expect her to turn around and her vest say, “Hi! How can I help you today?” And she has a pricing gun shoved into one pocket and a walkie-talkie in the other.
July 28, 2010 at 7:56 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
July 28, 2010 at 8:17 pm
#17 if you ARE correct I stand behind my IMPRESSIVE statement
July 28, 2010 at 9:49 pm
Bronc is a photoshopping god!
July 28, 2010 at 11:05 pm
Factory error. They put the ‘Audra Lindley’ outfit on the ‘Snookie-Orange Tan Barbie.’
So sad that I even know who Snookie is. :/
July 29, 2010 at 1:17 am
that is excellent photo-shopping!
July 29, 2010 at 2:41 am
Too bad no Barbie shoes come with the outfit. I’m thinking pink mules with malibu feathers would be a perfect match.
July 29, 2010 at 4:09 am
This is what barbie wears when she is having a “fat” day
July 29, 2010 at 4:24 am
Does it come with a bottle of gin? The memaw ensemble isn’t complete without some gin in a coffee cup.
July 29, 2010 at 4:55 am
My size 8-1/2′s are awesome, thankyouverymuch.
July 29, 2010 at 5:57 am
Maybe its a limited edition Barbie Miami?
July 29, 2010 at 6:32 am
“Welcome to Walmart. We’re having a sale on Dream Houses and pink Corvettes, and our accessory trunks are BOGO.”
July 29, 2010 at 6:43 am
Is this what happens to Barbie after Ken dumps her leaving her with 5 kids? Her hair looks like hell. She’s dressing like grandma. Amazingly even with all she has gone through she still has that beautiful smile! Poor thing, I think she needs some Zoloft.
July 29, 2010 at 7:22 am
It frightens me how accurate this is. Now all she needs is the dull husband accessory who looks at the camera every time he makes a joke.
July 29, 2010 at 7:50 am
At least she’ll have a date. Ken’s formalwear is something else, complete w/ neck brace and pajama bottoms!
http://www.etsy.com/listing/51267799/formal-wear-for-ken?ref=v1_other_1
July 29, 2010 at 8:07 am
It’s Depressingly Post Menopausal Barbie!
Doll really smells of secondhand smoke, rum and shattered dreams!
accessory pack is sold separately and includes: empty chocolate boxes,plastic couch covers, doilies, daytime television set , and 14 cats
July 29, 2010 at 8:36 am
Oo mama! That pink number makes me wanna rip it off the doll with my teeth and repurpose it as a snazzy merkin.
>sips tea<
July 29, 2010 at 9:00 am
Check out the lapels on Ken’s jacket, looks like something from the Ralph Furley collection:
July 29, 2010 at 9:09 am
What the heck happen to Ken’s hair? I think I get it. Ken dumps Barbie for a 20 something babe. She tires of him fast, leaving him shattered and broken.
When Barbie won’t take him back Ken turns to a life of drugs and alcohol. Soon Ken calls a cardboard box his condo. His day job is begging for coins on city streets with the hope that his famous smile will earn him a couple bucks a day.
July 29, 2010 at 9:43 am
I almost want to buy this for April and make her a Mrs. Roper barbie…
July 29, 2010 at 10:47 am
How great is it this seller uses fake-tanned Barbie and Ken dolls who look like they’re enjoying a shopping trip to the local Salvation Army, nursing Sunday hangovers in Zubaz or posing (out-of-focus) in a sweater grandma made? This is like “What Not to Wear” for Barbies, and I cannot look away.
July 29, 2010 at 11:29 am
As a child I used to dress Ken in Barbies clothes. My Ken would have looked AWESOME in this.
July 29, 2010 at 12:57 pm
#43 craftycoug :
“Ken’s formalwear is something else, complete w/ neck brace and pajama bottoms!”
It’s actually Ken’s “suit for bringing suit”, when you need $$$ & just have to go to court.
When you need to showcase your bad whiplash from the rear-end collision, or when you’re trying to show your employer’s negligence for slipping & falling @ work& injuring your back – this is the outfit to do it in. Guaranteed to increase your settlement $$$.
July 29, 2010 at 5:01 pm
Am I the only one who has Screamin’ Jay Hawkins’ “Feast of the Mau Mau” stuck in their head now?
July 29, 2010 at 5:26 pm
O hai thar, I finally made it to HonFest!
July 29, 2010 at 7:20 pm
Just because Barbie is old enough to be a Grandma doesn’t mean she has to dress like one!
July 30, 2010 at 2:16 am
Mrs. Roper wore caftans. MAUDE wore the long-ass vests. C’mon April, tell me you didn’t think of Maude! Just cut the sleeves off this, and there you go! http://www.insidesocal.com/outinhollywood/photos016.jpg
July 30, 2010 at 8:45 am
Oooh, I do hope she does Aunt Esther as a companion piece!
July 31, 2010 at 6:45 am
YAY! I am so excited that something I sent in to Regretsy MADE IT TO THE PAGE!
I feel my bad taste has been validated!