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When Irish Goatse are Smiling

Sometimes I think I’m the only one with an internet connection.

LMGTFY

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62 comments on When Irish Goatse are Smiling

  1. bumblepuppy
    July 21, 2010 at 4:33 pm

    Dear God, do not click that link!

    Thumb up Thumb down +53

  2. kirstenrana
    July 21, 2010 at 4:38 pm

    A true symbol of love and devotion. When you want to show you really care, give her the gift of goatse.

    Thumb up Thumb down +85

  3. Skully
    July 21, 2010 at 4:39 pm

    Now I have The J. Geils Band’s “Love Stinks” stuck in my head.

    Thumb up Thumb down +58

  4. Patty actually IS Steampunk!
    July 21, 2010 at 4:40 pm

    I don’t need to click that link… someone early in my Internet life made me aware of goatse. I died a little that day.

    And if this ring didn’t look so damn tacky with the “simulated diamonds” I would totally get this for myself as an anniversary gift.

    (that’s right, feel sorry for Patty, she has to buy herself anniversary gifts) :p

    Thumb up Thumb down +64

  5. hamoza
    July 21, 2010 at 4:40 pm

    Sure , contemporary symbolic token of friendship & love , meet contempor-aneus stylee, for celebtrating luv friendship & I wanna’ f*ck you in the ass .

    Thumb up Thumb down +43

  6. trousers rolled
    July 21, 2010 at 4:41 pm

    The recession has certainly hit the precious metals industry hard. Platinum and gold used to be special.

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  7. kirstenrana
    July 21, 2010 at 4:42 pm

    Because a gift of lube doesn’t always win them over.

    Thumb up Thumb down +56

  8. leftfoot
    July 21, 2010 at 4:43 pm

    I wonder what’s been around long: the Irish or ass play. Has to be ass play. I’ve seen monkeys at the zoo.

    Thumb up Thumb down +41

  9. HelenaHandbasket
    July 21, 2010 at 4:45 pm

    Relax.

    Thumb up Thumb down +28

  10. kirstenrana
    July 21, 2010 at 4:46 pm

    Wait, are those hands modeled after Ronald McDonald’s? This just got creepier.

    Thumb up Thumb down +50

  11. Wednesday
    July 21, 2010 at 4:49 pm

    What do you think the “Giver” version looks like?

    Thumb up Thumb down +40

  12. coolpauper
    July 21, 2010 at 4:57 pm

    well, you learn something new everyday… and now I know what to call what that guy was doing in John Waters’ Pink Flamingos. Set to music no less.

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  13. rumi monger
    July 21, 2010 at 5:02 pm

    at least now we know where Nicole’s arm went.

    Thumb up Thumb down +60

  14. Xniner
    July 21, 2010 at 5:08 pm

    Haha you’re right Kristenrana, it does look like Ronald McDonald’s hands! Ooh, now why did they name that other one Grimace? McDonald’s has just achieved a new level of perversion in my mind.

    Thumb up Thumb down +34

  15. razberries
    July 21, 2010 at 5:20 pm

    Okay, so wait- when you wear it facing you, that means you like spreading butt cheeks, and when you wear it facing others, that means you want someone to spread your butt cheeks?
    Did I get that right?

    Thumb up Thumb down +158

  16. mtopia
    July 21, 2010 at 5:37 pm

    The most disturbing part is where is asks if I know my size.

    Thumb up Thumb down +127

  17. captaincavegirl
    July 21, 2010 at 5:50 pm

    Well, at least you can save 50% off retail. No sense in overpaying for your anus ring.

    Thumb up Thumb down +38

  18. Catullus’Girlfriend
    July 21, 2010 at 5:51 pm

    “A contemporary version of the traditional Irish wedding ring” because obviously, the traditional version was a prude.

    Thumb up Thumb down +45

  19. nitebyrd
    July 21, 2010 at 5:52 pm

    Well, he’s probably not really into you if he’s only spending $24.95.

    Thumb up Thumb down +25

  20. knittin-kitten
    July 21, 2010 at 6:22 pm

    If the Irish had known about this ring, and goatse, I doubt they would have saved civilization.

    Thumb up Thumb down +23

  21. cratz
    July 21, 2010 at 6:37 pm

    Can you imagine if someone proudly showed you their lovely wedding ring, and it was……that? It would be quite a feat to react without screaming, “Aaaaaaaaaaah, goatse!!!” or just laughing hysterically.

    Thumb up Thumb down +32

  22. StaticCling
    July 21, 2010 at 6:49 pm

    Oh, for the days goetse was just a caramel cream…

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  23. Holden Back
    July 21, 2010 at 6:52 pm

    It’s terribly poor form to wear jewellery when engaged in ass play – for so many reasons. Maybe it’s reminding you to remove all sharp objects before contemplating such activity.

    Thumb up Thumb down +24

  24. knittin-kitten
    July 21, 2010 at 6:55 pm

    This gives a whole new meaning to that Come on Eileen song.

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  25. thewhiterabbitaz
    July 21, 2010 at 7:16 pm

    They did say “modern”…Modern relationships just aren’t exciting unless you’re spreading your anus open for your partner. Or the internet.

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

  26. Fishy
    July 21, 2010 at 7:34 pm

    Even worse than having someone show you their wedding ring and see that it is this would be being proposed to with a ring in this style by someone unaware of the goatse meme. “What do you mean you said no because of the ring?” “Well…uh…it just reminded me of something.” “What?” “…”

    Thumb up Thumb down +33

  27. mnemonides
    July 21, 2010 at 7:37 pm

    That ring just looks angry to me. Like the hands are trying to rip the heart apart.

    Could be I’m just PMSing though.

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  28. keeffer
    July 21, 2010 at 7:43 pm

    BUTT where’s the crown?????

    Thumb up Thumb down +12

  29. Overt Agent
    July 21, 2010 at 7:57 pm

    I love you, from the heart of my bottom.

    Thumb up Thumb down +106

  30. cecikierk
    July 21, 2010 at 8:06 pm

    From the comment section: “This ring cured my cancer! I’ve never felt better in my life!”

    Thumb up Thumb down +20

  31. lieblingsbunny
    July 21, 2010 at 8:30 pm

    Everybody knows goatse + hearts = cure for cancer, I dunno why scientists are so slow on this.

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  32. HelenaHandbasket
    July 21, 2010 at 8:55 pm

    Okay, I read the ring’s Comments section-which one of you goes by “Jolanda”?

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

  33. polkadotbananas
    July 21, 2010 at 8:55 pm

    Well, I clicked the link against my better judgment. Score another one for ‘things I have seen on the internet that can never be erased from my brain.’

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  34. FootofCanal
    July 21, 2010 at 10:34 pm

    If you haven’t read the comments on that page DO SO NOW!

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  35. hamoza
    July 21, 2010 at 11:24 pm

    Thanks for the ‘heads up’ -a few of the comments are priceless!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  36. whisperhaha
    July 22, 2010 at 2:59 am

    oh dear god. I did not know what it meant; until now.
    this ring has issues.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  37. SinisterTwist
    July 22, 2010 at 5:49 am

    I guess love means never having to say “Let’s goatse”.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  38. SinisterTwist
    July 22, 2010 at 5:51 am

    This has to be the best comment of them all, regardless of whether or not the person was in on the goatse bit:

    “I absolutely love this ring. Every time I look in to it I am reminded of a beautiful experience and it holds so many memories for me. “

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

  39. Mrs.Vagoo
    July 22, 2010 at 6:04 am

    “Not as big as I thought it would be, but big enough!”

    The comments are great because they, like the goatse ring, are so understated.

    Thumb up Thumb down +20

  40. BillsBayou
    July 22, 2010 at 6:54 am

    “I want you to fill the hole in my heart with your love.”

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  41. BillsBayou
    July 22, 2010 at 6:55 am

    A Claddagh ring shows two hands HOLDING the heart and a crown on top. You DON’T have the hands RIPPING the heart apart. Or are they fighting over the heart? I don’t see love in this ring. I see violence.

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  42. BillsBayou
    July 22, 2010 at 7:05 am

    Symbolism:
    - Heart = Love (duh)
    - Silver Heart = Pure Love
    - Diamonds = Rock Solid, Unyielding Love
    (Then it gets dark)
    - The emptiness of the heart represents unrequited love.
    - The hands represent a refusal to let go.
    - The gold of the hands represents an over-compensation for inadequacies the giver feels but will be made golden during an extended period of your captivity in an undisclosed location.

    If you get this ring as a gift, call the police and join witness protection.

    Thumb up Thumb down +22

  43. BillsBayou
    July 22, 2010 at 7:07 am

    From the comments page (this guy gets it!)

    “With this ring I can forever immortalize one of my favorite websites and only those “in the know” react to it! I love it! So inconspicuous!”

    Thumb up Thumb down +17

  44. AnnieRexia
    July 22, 2010 at 7:10 am

    I learned 2 new words today. One of them is Claddagh.

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  45. BillsBayou
    July 22, 2010 at 7:17 am

    I wonder, can get my jeweler to make me “Two Girls One Ring”?

    Thumb up Thumb down +37

  46. ispeakcanadian
    July 22, 2010 at 7:49 am

    Uh, WHAT?! Nothing says love like the ruling of an iron fist. Or… a gold fist… or a gold plated fist… OR IT’S JUST A GOLD COLOURED FIST, OK?!! Pass the magic markers please.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  47. Snark-o-leptic Cesar
    July 22, 2010 at 8:52 am

    So when they said “rip you a new one” this is what they meant.

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  48. DizzyMissLizzy
    July 22, 2010 at 10:56 am

    Oh god, is this the next step in vajazzling?

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  49. Stretch65
    July 22, 2010 at 11:05 am

    I love you this (insert goatsee here) MUCH!!!

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  50. Skully
    July 22, 2010 at 11:53 am

    @ #10 kirstenrana and #14 Xniner: You’re right, this ring gives new meaning to the question “do you want to supersize that?”

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  51. Bevinwrath
    July 22, 2010 at 1:58 pm

    I think what bothers me the most is the lack of crown. The crown symbolizes loyalty and fidelity. What does it say about you if you want a Claddah ring without that?

    Also, I agree. Those hands look angry.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  52. aynart
    July 23, 2010 at 8:24 am

    i love this from their comments page: “Nice ring. Couldn’t decide if I wanted to keep it cause it’s a little bigger than I thought. Gave it to my daughter and she loved it.”

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  53. busybody
    July 23, 2010 at 6:11 pm
  54. PussDaddy
    July 25, 2010 at 10:23 am

    I always hated Claddaghs.

    Thumb up Thumb down -2

  55. Danni Dee
    July 29, 2010 at 11:28 am

    reminds me of prisoners holding prison bars with handcuffs on hmmm symbolism?

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  56. suzischnauzer
    July 29, 2010 at 11:29 am

    Well, that’ll teach me to click after I’ve been duly warned. J H Christ on a cracker, I must be a lot older than I thought. I am so disgusted I may never recover. {{{{{{shudder}}}}}}}

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  57. pdrunk
    July 29, 2010 at 11:38 am

    When you get it, please sing “What what in the butt.”

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  58. Griftastic
    July 29, 2010 at 3:41 pm

    If it were an actual circle instead of a heart, I would buy it for the giggle I would get every time I looked at it. Pink “simulated diamonds” would be even better =D

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  59. Social Outcast
    July 30, 2010 at 4:21 am

    aynart, the “Gave it to my daughter and she loved it.” comment disturbed/amused me too.

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  60. whyyyyyyyyyy
    August 27, 2010 at 8:08 pm

    ::cackle:: My boyfriend is giving me this ring for our anniversary. I fully intend to wear the hell out of it, show it off to everyone, and watch who chokes in recognition.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  61. goatse
    September 7, 2010 at 4:06 am

    $25 is a bargain for this. I want it in real white gold with real diamonds.

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  62. kaylynuke
    January 28, 2011 at 1:27 pm

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