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Things That Are Not Steampunk #12

61 comments on Things That Are Not Steampunk #12

  1. I’d be pretty steamy if I wore that damn thing during summer.

    Thumb up Thumb down +31

  2. Mrs.Vagoo
    July 16, 2010 at 1:32 pm

    “Yummy snaps”? Really?

    Thumb up Thumb down +47

  3. Efit
    July 16, 2010 at 1:38 pm

    What kind of Members Only bullshit is this? Oh lookie! They removed “steampunk” from the listing title but kept it in their tags. Nice try, ya kanuk!

    Thumb up Thumb down +24

  4. Efit
    July 16, 2010 at 1:39 pm

    What does any of this mean? (from their shop announcement):

    “1980′s vintage clothing and sexshop nostalgia, costume pieces of unique quality, trash and pop items, jock regalia and punk shamanism.”

    Thumb up Thumb down +33

  5. hamoza
    July 16, 2010 at 1:44 pm

    Fuuuuuuck that jacket is ugly.

    Preppy reject yard sale on Etsy.The name of the shop is ‘Bottomfeeder’. That sums it up beautifully.

    Thumb up Thumb down +32

  6. curlytopnola
    July 16, 2010 at 1:46 pm

    are the snaps meant to be eaten? i’m confused.

    Thumb up Thumb down +39

  7. VagtasticSteampunkSPRHRO
    July 16, 2010 at 1:46 pm

    I’m sorry, but I love the knuckle marks in the photoshopped one..

    Thumb up Thumb down +30

  8. VagtasticSteampunkSPRHRO
    July 16, 2010 at 1:47 pm

    It makes me think that he has extra arms, just waiting to sneak attack.

    Thumb up Thumb down +23

  9. FootofCanal
    July 16, 2010 at 1:48 pm

    http://www.etsy.com/listing/29265838/blue-dress-summer-sleeveless-with-red

    Do Canadians know what a muumuu is?????

    My only issue is the stain that is haunting this jacket.

    Thumb up Thumb down -1

  10. pplrdum
    July 16, 2010 at 1:48 pm

    this is the UNsexiest thing I’ve ever seen (Even with the stain on the front!)

    And why would you do that to HJ, HK? That’s just mean!

    I did it to Hugh Jackman because I’m jealous of his hunkiness. – BD

    Thumb up Thumb down +23

  11. knittin-kitten
    July 16, 2010 at 1:50 pm

    Perhaps she confused the “trash items” pile with the vintage clothing pile.

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  12. Xniner
    July 16, 2010 at 1:57 pm

    This isn’t vintage or handmade. This is someone plundering their elderly relatives’ closets.

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  13. methuselah
    July 16, 2010 at 1:57 pm

    May the ghosts of CBGB’s burn this pukeshit fuckwear on seller’s front lawn for even suggesting that anything labeled Jordache could be punk.

    Thumb up Thumb down +30

  14. easymac
    July 16, 2010 at 1:59 pm

    #8 I thought it was a man, too, but upon closer inspection I’m starting to think the model is a woman.

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  15. Wilma Fingerdoo
    July 16, 2010 at 2:02 pm

    Everyone knows that Members Only Jackets are way more steampunk than this.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  16. Bratfink
    July 16, 2010 at 2:02 pm

    OMG, it makes HUGH JACKMAN look like a pussy! =-O

    That alone tells you it sucks.

    Thumb up Thumb down +23

  17. knittin-kitten
    July 16, 2010 at 2:04 pm

    I’ll bet these are leftovers from the yard sale her parents had last weekend.

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  18. Patty actually IS Steampunk!
    July 16, 2010 at 2:14 pm

    This is NOT Steampunk and this is NOT “punk”.

    I grew up in the 80s and trust me when I say that this was NOT “punk” in the 1980s.

    Thumb up Thumb down +21

  19. VagtasticSteampunkSPRHRO
    July 16, 2010 at 2:16 pm

    Look at her shop. Find the man with the afro holding the purse. Enjoy.

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  20. Xniner
    July 16, 2010 at 2:21 pm

    http://www.etsy.com/listing/27537644/vintage-vegan-purse-handbag-by
    LOL!!1! What’s even funnier is that she tagged an old ugly vinyl purse: vegan.

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  21. leftfoot
    July 16, 2010 at 2:23 pm

    Dear Seller: I know that “douchebag” and “steampunk” are both 2-words that have been smooshed together to form adjectives that have come about in the fairly recent english-speaking history. However, they do not mean the same thing.

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  22. HelenaHandbasket
    July 16, 2010 at 2:23 pm

    Are Steampunk people replete with disposable income or something?

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  23. leftfoot
    July 16, 2010 at 2:24 pm

    whoops. that was supposed to say “mean the same thing”. ah well. proofreading fail.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  24. siriusimagery
    July 16, 2010 at 2:35 pm

    Do people know what steampunk means? People must be doing this just so they can get on Regretsy. Sad really.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  25. Recovering Crack Baby
    July 16, 2010 at 2:41 pm

    Last vintage jacket I got I had to explain how the weed in the pocket was my Grandma’s. This listing is traumatic for me.

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  26. coolpauper
    July 16, 2010 at 2:43 pm

    I think this is actually steam new wave.

    Thumb up Thumb down +23

  27. siriusimagery
    July 16, 2010 at 2:45 pm

    I guess maybe I should start tagging my pictures steampunk so I can get on Regretsy. Then I can start a thread on Etsy asking for pity because I got on Regretsy.

    Be nice to BrightCircle. – BD

    Thumb up Thumb down +52

  28. Efit
    July 16, 2010 at 2:46 pm

    Okay. I’m pretty damn openminded. But when you can see fur in a blurry picture (3rd one), it’s time to bust out the Lady Remington: http://www.etsy.com/listing/25478810/ladies-springsummer-jacket-by?ref=v1_other_2

    She’s not going to bow down to your patriarchal razor oppression! This stubble is a big “FUCK YOU” to the Man, see. – BD

    Thumb up Thumb down +17

  29. Miss_Mercurial
    July 16, 2010 at 2:46 pm

    Wow, misuse of “steampunk”, “vintage”, “sexy”, “yummy”, AND “punk.” Someone get this seller a dictionary. They need to know that words do mean things, and that if you use words to tag an object for sale the object ought to have something to do with the tags. If I search “steampunk” and see this POS jacket, I’m not going to go “Oh, I think I’ll but that random piece of junk, now that it’s turned up in my search.” I’m going to be pissed at the asshole who mistagged it and…

    Thumb up Thumb down +17

  30. Stretch65
    July 16, 2010 at 2:49 pm

    The use of STEAMPUNK as one of the descriptive tags we can all agree is BS. The Seller almost redeems themself by using the tag BOTTOMFEEDER

    BOTTOMFEEDER tag FTW !!!

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  31. AreYouGoingToEatThatPickle
    July 16, 2010 at 2:53 pm

    @#3 Efit: It’s Canuk, with a “c”, and we’re not *ALL* fucktards! *shifty eyes* ;) In fact, this seller is from Montreal; and a lot of people from the rest of the country would prefer if Montreal (and the entire province of Quebec) wasn’t part of the country anyhow.

    *waits for thumbs downing from the Francophone loving Canuckleheads on Regretsy*

    Thumb up Thumb down +30

  32. MonstersFromTheID
    July 16, 2010 at 2:59 pm

    I’m disappointed.

    I went to the shop, to see what might qualify as “sexshop nostalgia”. Nothing. No upcycled blow-up dolls, repurposed dildos, or anything else to make me long for cheap, demeaning, desperate sexual encounters.

    Thumb up Thumb down +24

  33. Efit
    July 16, 2010 at 3:00 pm

    @#31 – Merde, eh? I’m from Texas and we get the same dumbshit stereotype.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  34. Recovering Crack Baby
    July 16, 2010 at 3:05 pm

    #32 MonstersFromTheID There is always Craigslist!!

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  35. rumi monger
    July 16, 2010 at 3:09 pm

    i am just here to say that Sexshop Nostalgia would make an excellent name for a band.

    Thumb up Thumb down +40

  36. knittin-kitten
    July 16, 2010 at 3:14 pm

    #28 Efit – Eeeeeeeeew.

    If she’s too lazy to iron the clothes she’s putting on Etsy, what are the chances they’ve been washed?

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  37. Mistletoe
    July 16, 2010 at 3:28 pm

    I’ve finally figured out what that loud, rhythmic ticking noise is.

    It’s the sound of my IQ being ratcheted down several points at a time with each new not-Steampunk post.

    Much more of this and I’ll start wanting to go to a Tea Party Rally or cheer for the Yankees or some damn thing.

    There are worse things than cheering for the Yankees:) – BD

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  38. tehawesomersace
    July 16, 2010 at 3:39 pm

    “Sexshop nostalgia”? Finally, a way to resale all of grandma’s vintage vibrators.

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

  39. EmpressBarb
    July 16, 2010 at 4:02 pm

    If Hugh Jackman can’t make this sartorial disaster look good, what hope does a mere mortal man have?

    But more to the point, if you get nostalgic for sex shop merchandise, you are ever so weird. And Icky.

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  40. Skully
    July 16, 2010 at 4:09 pm

    Yummy snaps + yummy eye pillow = Cap’n Yummy (the heat’s really fucking with my head today)
    http://i985.photobucket.com/albums/ae338/grinreaper1965/Regretsy/capnyummy.jpg

    Thumb up Thumb down +21

  41. Mistletoe
    July 16, 2010 at 4:41 pm

    “There are worse things than cheering for the Yankees:) – BD”

    Not if you’re a New England puritanical crab hammerer, like m’self.

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  42. Chrisnyc1213
    July 16, 2010 at 4:55 pm

    Maybe Steampunk is short for “Steaming Pile of Shit” in some craft circles and we just don’t know it?

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  43. ScrapMetal
    July 16, 2010 at 5:05 pm

    So where’s the sexshop stuff? Darn, I was looking forward to it. Here’s the guy with Afro holding a purse:
    http://www.etsy.com/listing/27537644/vintage-vegan-purse-handbag-by

    Oh and maybe we should give the shop a “leetle” benefit of the doubt as they probably speak Quebecois so they might be a bit uncertain about those silly English terms. Maybe Steampunk=punk, yummy=shiny, bottomfeeder=a kinky sex act (that must be where they got the sexshop idea?)

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  44. dcoyote
    July 16, 2010 at 5:05 pm

    #28- GROSS!! I guess we have another bear on Regretsy today!

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  45. Vile & Evil Debbie Downer
    July 16, 2010 at 5:29 pm

    Skully,

    gYAAHH!!!

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  46. Wednesday
    July 16, 2010 at 7:21 pm

    I give the model some credit. He looks thoroughly ashamed of wearing this “garment.”

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  47. Kecky
    July 16, 2010 at 7:42 pm

    dude this isn’t even remotely REGULAR punk.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  48. StaticCling
    July 16, 2010 at 9:13 pm

    This is more chess club than punk. I can just see him waiting on the school steps for his mother.

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  49. Vile & Evil Debbie Downer
    July 16, 2010 at 9:59 pm

    VagtasticSteampunkSPRHRO, what I love most about the Jackman ‘shop are his perky little boobs.

    Or ‘boob’, since the other one seems to be shopped out. What? Jealous of his boobage too, Bronc?

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  50. StinkBait
    July 17, 2010 at 7:43 am

    She only has a 93% on her feedback.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  51. raven
    July 17, 2010 at 8:11 am

    I think the “punk” tag disturbs me more….

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  52. Efit
    July 17, 2010 at 10:25 am

    @#36 – The idea of not washing the clothes? Now that’s nastysauce.

    @#51 et al – The fact that it’s not punk and s/he’s calling it punk makes it totally punk rock. Oi.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  53. beqi
    July 17, 2010 at 5:04 pm

    Hmmm. Obviously this person has confused ‘hipster douchebag’ with ‘punk’, ‘steampunk’, or ‘something someone with eyesight would voluntarily wear’.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  54. mistress dido
    July 17, 2010 at 5:20 pm

    There’s no way Jordache can be part of any punk ensemble. Not even with safety pins, spray paint, Ramones patches, plaid fingerless gloves or Chuck Taylors.

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  55. Vile & Evil Debbie Downer
    July 18, 2010 at 5:58 pm
  56. pandoraslocker
    July 18, 2010 at 8:58 pm

    Seems like like anything with a little metal on it can be considered steampunk.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  57. bastetsscarabee
    July 19, 2010 at 3:05 am

    Great scott! I had to wear that kind of jacket at ´70´s and I totally wear no more sausage skin like that!

    Hugh with electric blue vest looks like totally pussy.

    And wait…isn´t there a grease stain too at the right???!!! What´s the matter with these people selling dirty rags outrageous prices???!!

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  58. freckleyredhead
    July 19, 2010 at 7:43 am

    I had this exact jacket. I loved it. I miss it.

    **cries a little**

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  59. Mookie
    July 19, 2010 at 8:47 am

    I’m pretty sure my Mum made me wear one of these when I was 8. Oh, K-way, had I known you were the cause of all that evil playground torment!

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  60. suzyactiondoll
    July 19, 2010 at 6:45 pm

    This and the KaliMa coat should be teamed up as a visual sartorial journey through young adulthood.

    KaliMa for the college days and experimentation that you did with the girls (and hey, who didn’t?)
    Jordache because, no matter how nice the girls were, you really wanted to marry that nice cardiologist that you met when you were out with Nana.

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  61. RainbowZombie13
    January 28, 2012 at 1:31 am

    Yes, the jacket is lame, outdated and not even close to steampunk…
    Buuuuut, Did anyone else notice it looks like Hugh has a huge boner in his leather pants? LOL

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

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