so a foot long white decal for your car window.. how about a simple sign, in fancy lettering saying ‘warning! driver is an idiot and can’t see a fucking thing’
This is my comment. This comment won’t really describe what I’m thinking or whats going on, I expect everyone else to figure that out.
I’m going to be absent mindedly ambiguous and maybe make a few typing errors, but not because I need to clean my keyboard or anything. Its more likely that I am too involved in watching Ultimate Fighting or Judge Judy or something.
I should probably also over punctuate and randomly capitalize letters….Whats going on? I’ll give you a dollar for more…
I’ll need a paintbrush, and a gallon of white Sears Weatherbeater.
If you want a rush job, I’ll use a roller.
Which leads me to old joke my Dad made…I had told him that Michaelangelo had spent over 10 years painting the Sistine chapel ceiling. Dad replied, I could have gotten it done in 2 days if I’d used a roller.
haHA! This reminds me of something equally as stupid! I worked at a record store for … way too long. Anyways, it was a guarantee that at least once a day we’de have someone come in and say, “I’m trying to figure out this song, but I don’t know who it’s by, or what it’s called, or really how it goes…I heard it on the radio!” or something similarly asinine.
This would, of course, be followed by a tone-deaf, indistinguishable-from-the-original rendition of whatever song it was they were trying to find!
My personal favourite? A 65+ year-old very conservative woman trying to sing Timbaland/One Republic in what can only be described as a tortured puppy falsetto.
(This kind of thing happens a lot to my friend who works at a bookstore. People come in and want to find a book they saw somewhere, and the information they have is, “It’s got a blue cover.”)
Yes, people don’t seen to realize that if they took the time to write something down, it would save them from having me make fun of them all day.
But where would the fun in that be?
He can recall songs no one has heard in years. Of course he asks: “Yeah, what’s the name of that song, can’t remember who sings it… you know it, it goes Naa Na Naaaaa Naaaa Naa…” Except that all the humming is in the same (off-key) note, and the beat is off. All these snippets sound the same.
You’d think with half the basement being his LP collection… you’d think wrong.
Hi, I’m looking for a custom window decal for my car. I would like it to be white and foot long. I know EXACTLY what I want, but what I want only exists inside my head. I can draw this thing that I want for this white foot long thingy but my drawing sucks and I don’t want this to suck. But if you don’t know what this thingy is that only exists in my head I shall bitch and moan about how awful you are at reading minds of those who want custom window decals.
AreYouGoingToEatThatPickle
June 22, 2010 at 7:16 pm
LOL @ #34 Mookie :
I worked in a higher-end supermarket to put myself through college. In the meat/seafood department there was a tank LIVE of lobster and a tank of LIVE rainbow trout. On one occasion I was approached and asked if the fish were fresh… I’m not quite sure how I maintained my composure, but I told the lady that they were just delivered earlier in the day.
….was she looking for something fresher than still alive?
I was training a new girl in our Home Improvment store and I was explaining that you can tell a customer how to do something but some just should not even attempt tying their shoes when a lady walked up and asked how the scotch tape dispenser works and how does it cut the tape..Oh dear..then acted like we were lying to her. I had to let that one go before I made up some shit insted. Oh and another: What’s wallpaper paste used for? Um gravy.
Continuing on that vein, I worked in a drive-thru and a lady asked if our iced tea is low in fat. I replied, “I don’t know how much fat leaves and water can have in it, but I’m sure it’s not a lot.”
If you’ve ever done any sort of graphics work for anyone, you know this isn’t rare. You work it up, they say, “Yeah, that’s great but can we change ______?” It goes on ad nauseum until you’re not sure you even recognize your own work. For someone who doesn’t have an idea of what they want, they can be darn specific when it comes down to it.
June 22, 2010 at 9:34 am
no picture and no drawing… that’s a surefire way to get exactly what you want.
June 22, 2010 at 9:36 am
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June 22, 2010 at 9:45 am
Large piece of elephant poop it is!
June 22, 2010 at 9:46 am
Correction: Large piece of elephant poop in white.
June 22, 2010 at 9:46 am
$5 dollar foot long.
June 22, 2010 at 9:46 am
I apologize for the redundancy, sorry.
June 22, 2010 at 9:47 am
I should bid. I can draw the best Invisible Man there is. And for $1 too. Easy work.
June 22, 2010 at 9:47 am
Goatse?
June 22, 2010 at 9:49 am
“Heyy! I’m a total dumbass and want something in white and a foot long and pay $1 but can’t tell you what it should look like. KTHX!!”
June 22, 2010 at 9:49 am
you got it, i will make you exactly what you described!
June 22, 2010 at 9:50 am
so a foot long white decal for your car window.. how about a simple sign, in fancy lettering saying ‘warning! driver is an idiot and can’t see a fucking thing’
June 22, 2010 at 9:52 am
I don’t know what I want or how to describe it but I want you to know what I’m thinking of.
June 22, 2010 at 9:55 am
I tried this once, but the state inspectors figured out that it was just a decal and still cited me for not having a real window in my car.
June 22, 2010 at 9:56 am
Easy peasy.
“I’m a douche.” Across the back windshield.
1 Dollar + Shipping = Well spent.
June 22, 2010 at 9:56 am
Back window, my bad. I know how to type, really.
June 22, 2010 at 9:58 am
i suppose the 4 folks who bid have telepathy.
i mean, you’d HAVE to be the amazing kreskin for this request…
June 22, 2010 at 10:00 am
I’ve got it! She wants a foot-long, white decal of a car window to put in her car window – maybe she’s going for some kind of trompe l’oeil…?
June 22, 2010 at 10:05 am
This is my comment. This comment won’t really describe what I’m thinking or whats going on, I expect everyone else to figure that out.
I’m going to be absent mindedly ambiguous and maybe make a few typing errors, but not because I need to clean my keyboard or anything. Its more likely that I am too involved in watching Ultimate Fighting or Judge Judy or something.
I should probably also over punctuate and randomly capitalize letters….Whats going on? I’ll give you a dollar for more…
June 22, 2010 at 10:09 am
I didn’t draw this exact thing just yesterday. Where’s my dollar?
June 22, 2010 at 10:15 am
I think a copy of “The Bladeless Knife Whose Handle is Missing” might cover this request.
June 22, 2010 at 10:15 am
Heeeyy, duude – I know exactly what ur talking about:
http://i990.photobucket.com/albums/af28/sunshynegrll/copcar.jpg
June 22, 2010 at 10:19 am
GoreKitten, go here and sign in using the the same email address you used to sign up with wordpress:
http://en.gravatar.com/
June 22, 2010 at 10:21 am
Ooooh, I hope I guess correctly. I could really use that dollar.
June 22, 2010 at 10:23 am
I just hope he has the good sense to remove it in time for labor Day.Y’know what they say about white……
June 22, 2010 at 10:29 am
Hmmmm, cheap white & foot long- give or take an inch or two & we could be talking about my ex.
June 22, 2010 at 10:53 am
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June 22, 2010 at 11:05 am
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June 22, 2010 at 11:16 am
we need more distractions for drivers…. I’ll have two
June 22, 2010 at 11:20 am
Hey…let me know where she lives…I’ll spray paint the back window of her car for free!
June 22, 2010 at 11:29 am
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June 22, 2010 at 11:39 am
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June 22, 2010 at 11:53 am
http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/3/3f/Mackie_of_Larg_arms.svg/545px-Mackie_of_Larg_arms.svg.png&imgrefurl=http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Mackie_of_Larg_arms.svg&usg=__4vv13oopyOQMsh3dmB5abL4stVw=&h=600&w=545&sz=127&hl=en&start=9&itbs=1&tbnid=mMTonvmJjbcFZM:&tbnh=135&tbnw=123&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dlarg%26hl%3Den%26safe%3Dactive%26gbv%3D2%26tbs%3Disch:1
June 22, 2010 at 12:00 pm
I’ll need a paintbrush, and a gallon of white Sears Weatherbeater.
If you want a rush job, I’ll use a roller.
Which leads me to old joke my Dad made…I had told him that Michaelangelo had spent over 10 years painting the Sistine chapel ceiling. Dad replied, I could have gotten it done in 2 days if I’d used a roller.
June 22, 2010 at 1:13 pm
haHA! This reminds me of something equally as stupid! I worked at a record store for … way too long. Anyways, it was a guarantee that at least once a day we’de have someone come in and say, “I’m trying to figure out this song, but I don’t know who it’s by, or what it’s called, or really how it goes…I heard it on the radio!” or something similarly asinine.
June 22, 2010 at 1:15 pm
This would, of course, be followed by a tone-deaf, indistinguishable-from-the-original rendition of whatever song it was they were trying to find!
My personal favourite? A 65+ year-old very conservative woman trying to sing Timbaland/One Republic in what can only be described as a tortured puppy falsetto.
June 22, 2010 at 1:16 pm
I carry these, but right now I’ve only got purple. Would that be okay? Convo me.
June 22, 2010 at 1:17 pm
(This kind of thing happens a lot to my friend who works at a bookstore. People come in and want to find a book they saw somewhere, and the information they have is, “It’s got a blue cover.”)
June 22, 2010 at 1:20 pm
Yes, people don’t seen to realize that if they took the time to write something down, it would save them from having me make fun of them all day.
But where would the fun in that be?
June 22, 2010 at 2:18 pm
Somehow, “Eh?” seems to sum up my feelings on this quite eloquently.
June 22, 2010 at 2:33 pm
It’s not really all that complicated.
http://i175.photobucket.com/albums/w156/Yzziefrog/Regretsy/windowsdecal.jpg
I’ll take that dollar on my Tim Horton’s card, please.
June 22, 2010 at 2:40 pm
#34 Mookie
I see you’ve met my husband.
He can recall songs no one has heard in years. Of course he asks: “Yeah, what’s the name of that song, can’t remember who sings it… you know it, it goes Naa Na Naaaaa Naaaa Naa…” Except that all the humming is in the same (off-key) note, and the beat is off. All these snippets sound the same.
You’d think with half the basement being his LP collection… you’d think wrong.
June 22, 2010 at 3:20 pm
Too bad a sheet of foolscap is only 11″.
You could stick it on with spit.
June 22, 2010 at 3:27 pm
He wants it to be larg. So I went to the urban dictionary, ewww!
He can keep his dollar.
June 22, 2010 at 3:31 pm
A dollar????? I am so sick of these cheap ass people. Go to Walmart!
June 22, 2010 at 4:01 pm
On the upside, he can hardly complain about the results…
June 22, 2010 at 4:52 pm
wtf?
June 22, 2010 at 5:42 pm
I have a foot shaped insert that came inside my husband’s work boots.
It’s a foot, almost white, and with a little adhesive-waaa laaa!
June 22, 2010 at 5:49 pm
Dude I’ll make it. Whit like that one decal. You know? The one with the thing, with letters.
You know, like that one car had on that one day when there was a slightly cloudy sky.
June 22, 2010 at 5:58 pm
Hi, I’m looking for a custom window decal for my car. I would like it to be white and foot long. I know EXACTLY what I want, but what I want only exists inside my head. I can draw this thing that I want for this white foot long thingy but my drawing sucks and I don’t want this to suck. But if you don’t know what this thingy is that only exists in my head I shall bitch and moan about how awful you are at reading minds of those who want custom window decals.
Price is negotiable.
June 22, 2010 at 7:16 pm
LOL @ #34 Mookie :
I worked in a higher-end supermarket to put myself through college. In the meat/seafood department there was a tank LIVE of lobster and a tank of LIVE rainbow trout. On one occasion I was approached and asked if the fish were fresh… I’m not quite sure how I maintained my composure, but I told the lady that they were just delivered earlier in the day.
….was she looking for something fresher than still alive?
June 23, 2010 at 12:00 am
I was training a new girl in our Home Improvment store and I was explaining that you can tell a customer how to do something but some just should not even attempt tying their shoes when a lady walked up and asked how the scotch tape dispenser works and how does it cut the tape..Oh dear..then acted like we were lying to her. I had to let that one go before I made up some shit insted. Oh and another: What’s wallpaper paste used for? Um gravy.
June 23, 2010 at 12:02 am
“I am sure I could draw something to give u an idea what it is … but I am not good at drawing.”
He doesn’t sound very sure.
June 23, 2010 at 10:21 am
#50 AreYouGoingToEatThatPickle:
Continuing on that vein, I worked in a drive-thru and a lady asked if our iced tea is low in fat. I replied, “I don’t know how much fat leaves and water can have in it, but I’m sure it’s not a lot.”
June 23, 2010 at 5:27 pm
Uh, no picture, no drawing, no DESCRIPTION of what you want. Sure, I’ll get right on that.
June 24, 2010 at 11:36 am
If you’ve ever done any sort of graphics work for anyone, you know this isn’t rare. You work it up, they say, “Yeah, that’s great but can we change ______?” It goes on ad nauseum until you’re not sure you even recognize your own work. For someone who doesn’t have an idea of what they want, they can be darn specific when it comes down to it.
June 25, 2010 at 10:27 am
Sweet! I’m going to send them an uncut rectangular decal sheet.
July 3, 2010 at 11:18 pm
You have to remember, this poor chap is from Hollister, California. He’s done quite well!!!
July 20, 2010 at 5:33 pm
Figures this person would be from Hollister. No good has ever come from that place… eg: Their hs mascot? The Haybalers. Enough said.