Finally! Just the thing I need to keep evil chicken bitches away. i’m inundated!!
But.. wouldn’t a bitch that’s a chicken be too chicken to be a bitch?
OMG- Al! lol
Chicken Bitches? Huh? Every chicken I know (chickenpants and chicken poncho) are nice…
You can use it multipurpose. Hopefully.
Wow, this is the first time I’ve seen a Regretsy post with so few comments… either I’m fast today, or, the more likely explanation, everyone else is busy fending off evil chicken bitches.
It will keep EVERYBODY away. And teach you astrology and dowsing, but only those if you perform the goetic rituals correctly. (Is that too obscure?)
I wasn’t aware that chicken bitches were a widespread enough problem that we need products for them. The More You Know…
somewhere, Frank Perdue is cackling…
I am so damned confused. Are chicken bitches a new problem sweeping the world? Or is someone else taking better meds than I am?
It literally has chicken breasts. And a mullet. If that doesn’t keep away the evil chicken bitches away, nothing will.
Hey! You chicken bitches – stay outta my yard!
The only thing I can think of on seeing the sculpture is “Chicken Tits” I may never eat chicken breasts again.
Yeah fuck you Colonel Sanders! Ha take that Popeye’s bitches.
This is a fowl piece of chicken shit. I can say that with emphasis ‘cuz I really adore chickendom.
Do you hate Chicken Bitches? Sure, we all do!
Did she mean basted when she said casted?
You guys have NO idea how long I had to stand still for this artist to make this sculpture.
You know, when I was a kid, there was a fad where you could buy “Kitchen Witches” to ward off, I don’t know, bad cooking or something. “Kitchen Witch”…”Chicken Bitch”…. It kinda sounds the same…. Do you think this person just misunderstood?
I just ate some KFC in honor of this post. Couldn’t bring myself to do the Double Down, though.
I don’t understand why it has “people” feet…?
And if it’s not glazed… well, you can forget it having kind of REAL effect on your chicken bitches. I’m thinking a yummy lemon glaze, perhaps?
Was hoping for a sculpture to rid me of those pesky Rooster Bastards. But her shop is filled with sewing materials.
You had me at Circus Peanuts.
I bet the breast meat is…meaty.
Wait… now, if I GET this “chicken bitch”, how will that keep other chicken bitches away? Is it like a “head on a pike” in that it will serve as a warning that I will “casted” the shit outta any chicken bitch that dare enter my property?
Because I recall from ceramics class that we “cast” things, not “casted”… that’s like getting your dog “spay-ded”… you’re getting your dog “spayed”…
And thus ends our vocabulary lesson today.
It’s the chicken lady from KITH!
“Watcha doin’, ey?”
“I used to live in this house!”
Namaste chicken bitches!!!
I wonder why there are no shots of the backside of this….that tail feather thing looks like a piece of over baked calzone or pastry.
Oh shit , a whole fucking flock of these?????????
First ponchos for chickens. Now circus peanut chickens wearing Uggs.
I thought the same thing!
Namaste, chicken bitches.
I want to see pictures of this old Macdonald hell farm the seller lives on. Sweet Jesus if that is what the chickens look like I would invoke any scare tactics to run them off I could think of as well.
This “Chicken Bitch” just doesn’t seem to fit in that shop. I am befuddled.
Also @(B): I walk past KFC almost every day, drool at the poster in the window, and manage to restrain myself from going in for the Double D. The prominent excuse is “Hey, No Carbs in that”…but I’ve resisted. So far.
PS: Love the Math.
I think she may as well throw in a guarantee that a Chicken Bitch will never, ever pester you again, so long as you own this.
Looks like she got a failed implant…
“has” not “got”
grammar hard today
Sorry, I like my chicken glazed.
This is a statue of Lillian Zacky – Queen of the Chicken Bitches.
Betcha theres some meat on them Breasts
For chicken boobs , those things kinda’look engorged-lactating chick- that is not kosher.
Chicken Bitch was a Southern Cal fast food chain in the 70′s, (like Pup ‘N’ Taco or Naugles,) whose slogan was “Our chicken is raw fired, not glazed, you asshole.” When the servers were PMSing, they’d spit in your food, or stick a beak or foot in your bucket.
If you really NEED a chicken bitch… my aunt does these. For serious.
I need one of these cause I know some evil chicken bitches.
You ask for extra hot sauce and they won’t let you!
Then they tell you “they are the manager”.
Mmmm…. Circus Peanuts…….. *drooling*
“You men eat your dinner, eat your pork and beans
I eat more chicken any man ever seen”
“…And, please…try the fish.”
Mister DeFazio… PERFECT!
I would SWEAR the Dead Milkmen did a song called Chicken Bitch.
Chicken Sh*t Conformists ( Like Your Parents )
Why would I want to kept them chicken bitches away?
#49 Holytape – Good question!
I could scare off the chicken bitches but the brave ones…….. those could be trouble!
I am WAY too drunk to look at this.
what happens when you let Foghorn Leghorn schedule the nude model for the sculpture class.
Do my eyes deceive me or do I detect a little bit of Babs Streisand in that Chicken Bitch?
That hen looks like she’s in her 2nd trimester.
Good start, now I need something to get rid of all the cow fuckery, the damnable sheep, and the bloody pigs.
cursewords and livestock are fun!
Am I insane, or do female chickens not have that comb-thingy on their heads… is it just the wobbly chin-thingy they don’t have that roosters do? At any rate, I’m not going for this bitchy chicken. I prefer the Chicken Lady. At least with her, she might make you an omelette. . . with her body.
Gunfunnit Snarkey … just had to check this out. Yep hens have those comb-thingies … but they’re paler and smaller than the roosters’ …. they even have the chin wattles, but again, smaller and not so droopy.
Don’tcha wish female homo sapiens had smaller droops and wrinkles. Not fair!!!!
I know a whole blog full of chicken bitches. My bad, they are Etsy Bitches, but it’s basically the same thing.
I can’t help but wonder, does it explode?
@#57 PussDaddy, I thought your post said “a whole bag of chicken bitches” and I LOVE that mental picture.
This is one of those “scroll-down horrors.” The face is kinda cute in a primitive sculpture way, but then the “chicken breasts,” lumpy belly, the crack-induced description…well at least she isn’t charging and arm (wing?) and a leg for it.
There’s a catchphrase for you:
“you and a whole bag of chicken bitches”
“I’m gonna open up a whole bag of chicken bitches on your ass”
At last !! The perfect companion for my lawn gnome. He’s been alone too long and could really use some good chicken bitch love’n
Good start, but do you have anything to ATTRACT the chicken bitches?
#42 What? No Thumbs, Skully……the picky bastards.
I like my Chicken Bitches to be a solid C- Cup. I will have to pass on this one…that’s a solid A a B at best.
This is a Rooster. Rooster’s have combs on their heads the Bitches do not.
There once was a chicken bitch
Who while not charming was so full of kitsch
That it would have been nicer
If this hideous eye-sore
Had just been tossed into a ditch.
There once was a bitch that was chicken
But it could not be called finger-licken
For cast(ed) out of clay
It whim(b)sicly stood there all day
While all of regretsy was picken.
There once was a chicken so bitchin’
That it stood guard over old granny’s kitchen
Until a fateful day
Of a cooking foray;
Don’t let them cook when dementia sets in.
Is this chicken bitch holding up her tail with her wings or trying to tempt a little goat-see?
And she’s got cuffs on her ankles but no pants.
I think this person has never seen a live chicken.
I totally saw this episode of “That’s So Raven”.
Alright, you got me. After months and months of putting it off, this post finally got me to chuckle so hard that I had to register just so that I could tell you, darling, you are brilliant.
What? Chicken bitch?! YOU are the one who EATS them!
OMG #27 – Namaste chicken bitches!!! should totally be on a shirt!
I may be the only one, but I gotta tell ya… I effing love this thing. If it weren’t $65.00 I would already own it.
Hey check out this chicken bitch video!
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