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WTF Alchemy Request

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55 comments on WTF Alchemy Request

  1. itsdanilove
    March 31, 2010 at 4:35 pm

    Oy, you’re making me hungry for those Parisian fish and chips, guv’nor!

    Thumb up Thumb down +76

  2. MissMary
    March 31, 2010 at 4:36 pm

    Bwhahahahaha!!!

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  3. hamoza
    March 31, 2010 at 4:37 pm

    I simply adore the Louvre in London.

    Thumb up Thumb down +45

  4. pplrdum
    March 31, 2010 at 4:40 pm

    When I traveled overseas to Canada, my favorite tourist attraction was the Eiffel Tower in Berlin.

    Thumb up Thumb down +106

  5. leftfoot
    March 31, 2010 at 4:40 pm

    And the Picasso museum was fantastic.

    (figured I may as well throw a new city into the mix.)

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  6. mazumi
    March 31, 2010 at 4:41 pm

    For some reason, my instincts are telling me that person ate at that McDonalds next to the Louvre (LOO-vrah) a lot while they were in Paris.

    Thumb up Thumb down +28

  7. cratz
    March 31, 2010 at 4:42 pm

    Is the April Fool’s Day joke on her or us?

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  8. sudabaki©
    March 31, 2010 at 4:46 pm

    Not only does this person have amazing geography skills, but they described the painting so perfectly I feel as though I’m looking at it myself.

    Thumb up Thumb down +88

  9. lemon floor wax
    March 31, 2010 at 4:50 pm

    I honest to dog think this is my BFF’s mom. We were playing Pictionary and she drew the following: the USA (with an X on it) and the Eiffel tower. We guessed Paris, France, Europe, etc. When the timer ran out she screamed, “It’s LONDON, y’all!” and was so disgusted with us that she quit playing. We have the scribbles framed and hanging in our guest room.

    Thumb up Thumb down +128

  10. redredred
    March 31, 2010 at 4:52 pm

    My head hurts. Maybe this person went on a whirl wind tour through all of Europe and is still jet lagged. Yeah, that must be it. Please let that be it!?

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  11. Lexiii
    March 31, 2010 at 4:53 pm

    And how do you reproduce a painting without see it?

    Thumb up Thumb down +21

  12. kirstenrana
    March 31, 2010 at 4:54 pm

    Some people shouldn’t reproduce.

    Thumb up Thumb down +60

  13. MajorDanger
    March 31, 2010 at 4:59 pm

    Bonjouv Guv’ner!

    Thumb up Thumb down +45

  14. AreYouGoingToEatThatPickle
    March 31, 2010 at 4:59 pm

    I can’t help but think she was at Disney’s Magic Kingdom and remembers seeing a poster of the Hundred Acre Woods in the gift shoppe shortly before going on the It’s a Small World ride.

    …it is a small world, but it’s not THAT small.

    Thumb up Thumb down +42

  15. IscreamUscream
    March 31, 2010 at 5:01 pm

    It was the best of Thames, it was the worst of Thames…

    Thumb up Thumb down +111

  16. mtopia
    March 31, 2010 at 5:04 pm

    This woman is clearly inSeine!

    Thumb up Thumb down +99

  17. aen13
    March 31, 2010 at 5:10 pm

    FYI I think this might be what he actually wants

    http://www.museumsyndicate.com/item.php?item=14675

    Or possibly this

    http://www.metmuseum.org/works_of_art/collection_database/american_paintings_and_sculpture/on_the_thames_frank_myers_boggs/objectview_enlarge.aspx?page=22&sort=0&sortdir=asc&keyword=&fp=1&dd1=2&dd2=0&vw=1&collID=2&OID=20010541&vT=1

    Or maybe he saw them next to each other in a show of Boggs’ work and got confused, and now wants an unholy melding of the two works.

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  18. HermesGoddess
    March 31, 2010 at 5:12 pm

    Ahh, yes. This brings to mind a particularly moving visit I once made to the Anne Frank House in Copenhagen.

    Also…the comments here are actually even more awesome than usual, which is saying something. Thanks, Regretsians, I needed a laugh tonight.

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

  19. iunifera
    March 31, 2010 at 5:19 pm

    Actually, I would really like a painting of the Colorado River, you know, the one that runs through Mississippi?
    Please help, I can’t find it anywhere…

    Thumb up Thumb down +36

  20. mtopia
    March 31, 2010 at 5:20 pm

    England and all of its parts are a Parisian arrondissement, now? Has anyone told England?

    Thumb up Thumb down +23

  21. tarabu
    March 31, 2010 at 5:25 pm

    I have obviously been part of Regretsy for too long. I saw the title and thought it would be a request for a portrait of a fertilized ovum or some such representation of the process of reproduction.

    Thumb up Thumb down +31

  22. hamoza
    March 31, 2010 at 5:38 pm

    #20, mtopia-it won’t be pretty when they do…just ask Ireland ,etc…

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

  23. suzyactiondoll
    March 31, 2010 at 5:50 pm

    J’ai une belle regime des coconuts…

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  24. BettyMachete
    March 31, 2010 at 6:40 pm

    Looks like you can put a stamp and some writing on the other side of that there “painting”. Maybe the travel agent was on acid.

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  25. AreYouGoingToEatThatPickle
    March 31, 2010 at 6:55 pm

    @ #20 mtopia : Based on this story published across the country (Canada that is) today, England may not be that far off from being part of France! ;)

    http://www.thespec.com/News/BreakingNews/article/745932

    This turns my stomach, especially seeing so many of her ‘subjects’ homeless and destitute between where I park and my office every day… Poor Queen Liz had to switch to a wholesale supplier for her utilities! /end political rant

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  26. kipper
    March 31, 2010 at 7:02 pm

    Dieu et mon droit

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  27. HelenaHandbasket
    March 31, 2010 at 7:12 pm

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -11

  28. CreepyLittleGirl
    March 31, 2010 at 7:12 pm

    Everybody knows the Thames is in Las Vegas. Sheesh, some people.

    Thumb up Thumb down +32

  29. hamoza
    March 31, 2010 at 7:18 pm

    #28-@=CreepyLittleGirl
    Bwa hahaha. As they say over croissants & crumpets at the Bellagio, ‘Touche’

    Thumb up Thumb down +15

  30. SuperSnark
    March 31, 2010 at 7:18 pm

    Evidently the etsy pipe has made it’s way across the pond!

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  31. pervocracy
    March 31, 2010 at 7:31 pm

    Something about the phrasing makes me wonder if she has an actual picture of the painting, or if she plans to just tell the artist “there was some water, and some buildings, and some people and some other stuff” and expects they can reproduce the exact painting from that.

    Thumb up Thumb down +34

  32. SuperSnark
    March 31, 2010 at 7:43 pm

    pervocracy, and you just know they will give the poor person who accepts this bid bad feedback beacuse “it’s not what I envisioned”
    Maybe more and accurate details would help you get your chemical induced “vison” dumbass!

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  33. ckinsobe
    March 31, 2010 at 7:45 pm

    This happened to me in real life, I complimented one of my customers on some awesome piece of clothing she was wearing, asked where she bought it, “Paris” she said. Great, which part of Paris? I asked. “Camden Town” she said.

    Thumb up Thumb down +24

  34. Patty has returned the Australian
    March 31, 2010 at 7:56 pm

    Paris… Texas?

    Thumb up Thumb down +22

  35. razberries
    March 31, 2010 at 8:31 pm

    Paris…Hilton?

    Thumb up Thumb down +29

  36. Magickal Fuckery
    March 31, 2010 at 8:34 pm

    Since she doesn’t know who the artist is, and she apparently doesn’t know where on earth she saw it. (For all we know she was in Bangkok at the time). How the freek is anyone going to be able to reproduce it?

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  37. sudabaki©
    March 31, 2010 at 8:47 pm

    Can someone please make a copy of that thing, that I saw at that place? You know, that time.

    Thumb up Thumb down +50

  38. heidrun
    March 31, 2010 at 11:17 pm

    you spelled it wrong! the card has to say “bonjouv”. and if she’s add a picture of what she wants reproduced (not sure if i want to see it), then WAH-LAH! someone could do it, you know, en français.

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  39. Mookie
    April 1, 2010 at 12:21 am

    I … I … really? Really?! REALLY?! Really.

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  40. evacooper
    April 1, 2010 at 12:52 am

    #9 lemon floor wax :
    that cracked me up!
    stupidity is everywhere… we had a map of the world hanging in class (in israel) and one girl points at morocco (next to the word morocco) and says: this is israel, right?

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  41. ImAPanda
    April 1, 2010 at 5:52 am

    #40- At least she was in the right part of the world! A friend of mine thought Nepal was in France.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  42. unclehoward
    April 1, 2010 at 6:01 am

    Can I get fries with that?

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  43. eternalgreenknight
    April 1, 2010 at 7:07 am

    The Thames was actually relocated to Paris years ago in a nefarious Franch plot hatched by neighboring Australians. The water was housed in the grand ol’ oprey in Machu Pichu until it could be moved over the Himalayas in Florida by norse tanker ships. The water in London now actually came from the Niagra falls in Nigeria, but the Londonese don’t know all this because their sheikh hasn’t issued a proclamation from the tower of babel (where they keep their family jewels) yet. The painting…

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  44. eternalgreenknight
    April 1, 2010 at 7:09 am

    The painting, which was done by indian vikings, and now hangs in the holocaust art museum in stalingraad, clearly shows this.

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

  45. tainted
    April 1, 2010 at 7:49 am

    Did I tell you lately that I love you?!? Just what I needed after completing my 2009 tax returns, bonjour, magnifique! and applause!

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  46. Efit
    April 1, 2010 at 8:18 am

    @#25 – Now if only the Queen and the Vatican would, I dunno, make a vow of poverty, we could channel some of that funding into Geography classes for adults.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  47. Skully
    April 1, 2010 at 8:33 am

    I love Paris for fish fingers, when they sizzle
    I love Paris when Big Ben chimes, that’s fo’ shizzle

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  48. Skully
    April 1, 2010 at 9:14 am

    Was it painted on a hanky? If so, we know what the artist’s toe looks like:

    http://www.regretsy.com/2009/12/02/never-say-di/

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  49. eternalgreenknight
    April 1, 2010 at 9:17 am

    There’s a place in Franch
    Where the ladies all where skantz
    It’s along the Thames
    Where a man in a skirt swims.

    I see London I see France
    I see painting reproducshants

    Thumb up Thumb down +17

  50. mickey
    April 1, 2010 at 9:21 am

    You know how it is with those European rivers… Siene one; Siene ‘em all. They’re all the Thames.

    Thumb up Thumb down +25

  51. zregretsy
    April 1, 2010 at 10:15 am

    My mom is famous for saying stuff like this. It’s endearing, to a point…

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  52. detroit
    April 1, 2010 at 12:00 pm

    What are you guys talking about? I think I know what she means. When I went to Paris, I went on a gondola ride on the Thames, and I saw that exact painting!

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  53. Mistletoe
    April 1, 2010 at 1:39 pm

    The idea of expecting some artist to magically reproduce an image in the requester’s head is the stuff the Clients From Hell site is made of. It’s mind-boggling (and a touch depressing) to see how many people think exactly the same way. Reason #465 that I don’t do commissions.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  54. snarkeygirl
    April 1, 2010 at 4:07 pm

    Perhaps she should get a long-distance cleansing of her brain? Perhaps the painting will magically appear! I wish I had something funny to add…

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  55. sb
    April 2, 2010 at 11:20 am

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -3

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