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You’ve Got Fail!

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89 comments on You’ve Got Fail!

  1. knitvincible
    March 17, 2010 at 1:32 pm

    Best photo caption EVER!

    Thumb up Thumb down +47

  2. razberries
    March 17, 2010 at 1:32 pm

    Helen, you filthy little devil…I see the hidden message on the Massengil postcard…that is full of win! LOLLLL

    Thumb up Thumb down +44

  3. sudabaki©
    March 17, 2010 at 1:34 pm

    Oh there’s no chance I would mistake this crap for junk mail, rather than the charming idea that it is. None at all.

    Thumb up Thumb down +64

  4. Doedipus
    March 17, 2010 at 1:34 pm

    Gives to meaning to the term “junk mail.”

    Thumb up Thumb down +28

  5. Dynomoose
    March 17, 2010 at 1:34 pm

    That douche postcard could come in handy. Though, I wouldn’t pay someone for it.

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  6. giant_tostada
    March 17, 2010 at 1:35 pm

    that’s fucking genius.

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  7. cappysue
    March 17, 2010 at 1:35 pm

    Why the hell not at least pic some pretty images from boxes. Those just look like really big ass coupons.

    Thumb up Thumb down +58

  8. AnotherPersonsTrash
    March 17, 2010 at 1:35 pm

    I hope you upcycled that bag young lady!

    Thumb up Thumb down +28

  9. geektastic
    March 17, 2010 at 1:36 pm

    Once again, something that should have been REcycled has been UPcycled. Into pure crap.

    Thumb up Thumb down +49

  10. cappysue
    March 17, 2010 at 1:36 pm

    pic = pick :)

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  11. leftfoot
    March 17, 2010 at 1:37 pm

    You know, the Massengill one you made would be perfect for a post secret I saw a few months back. lol. You should open an “post secret post card” etsy shop :-)

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  12. sudabaki©
    March 17, 2010 at 1:37 pm

    #5 Dynomoose: I love it. Instead of Christmas cards, “you’re a douche” cards.

    Thumb up Thumb down +73

  13. joshpincusiscrying
    March 17, 2010 at 1:38 pm

    We have upcylcling recepticles all over our house. On Tuesday nights, I gather the upcycling in big plastic bags and take the upcycling to the curb so the upcycling truck can take it away the next day.

    Thumb up Thumb down +111

  14. Sculptor69
    March 17, 2010 at 1:39 pm

    Bwahahaa! If it didn’t cost actual money, I’d suggest we all “upcycle” some trash of our own and send this twit some postcards, with appropriate messages like HK’s.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  15. Sharon Dixon-Parks
    March 17, 2010 at 1:39 pm

    I’d be all over Helen’s version, though.

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  16. Monstrosa
    March 17, 2010 at 1:39 pm

    I’d like a set of Hostess Ding Dongs postcards

    Thumb up Thumb down +23

  17. curlytopnola
    March 17, 2010 at 1:39 pm

    Dear Grandma:
    This crappy camp mom sent me to has no postcards of Lake Hiawatha. So i have to make my own from trash that i pull out when i go dumpster diving behind the cafeteria.
    Having a wonderful time *sarcasm* – wish you were here *more sarcasm*.
    Love – Susie

    ps – could you send some disposable rubber gloves for the next trip to the trash bin?

    pps – and some snacks, b/c now, i’m hungry

    Thumb up Thumb down +41

  18. IscreamUscream
    March 17, 2010 at 1:40 pm

    :lol: “you’re a douche” could be a card for all occasions
    junk mail sums this one up

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  19. billso
    March 17, 2010 at 1:40 pm

    Facepalm.

    Thumb up Thumb down -1

  20. razberries
    March 17, 2010 at 1:40 pm

    All this seller had to do to make these more appealing was glue another image onto the front. Even a crappy drawing that was photocoppied and colored in by crayon and stuck on the front would look better than this…

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  21. Bemused
    March 17, 2010 at 1:42 pm

    I do have a question. Why?

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  22. HelenaHandbasket
    March 17, 2010 at 1:42 pm

    I am not a Crafter (I don’t even play one on tv), but I’m sure, with the help of my 8-year old, I could manage to execute this masterpiece, and even select the product I’d be sending my correspondence on; reducing the chance gramma would get a jock itch greeting.

    Thumb up Thumb down +19

  23. sudabaki©
    March 17, 2010 at 1:44 pm

    Maybe this seller is onto something. The subliminal possibilities are endless.

    Advil: You give me a fucking headache.
    Beano: You smell like shit.
    Planters: You drive me nuts.
    Dramamine: Your driving sucks
    Pepto Bismo: You make me want to puke

    Thumb up Thumb down +91

  24. buffoon
    March 17, 2010 at 1:44 pm

    Massengill. That was inspired, Helen. Kudos.

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  25. Not Me
    March 17, 2010 at 1:44 pm

    Oh god……..
    I’m gonna barf from laughing so hard!!!!

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  26. MadGypsy
    March 17, 2010 at 1:45 pm

    But thats not even really upcycling it into anything. Then it just becomes trash with crap written on it. Turn that empty frozen dinner box into something useful, like an LCD monitor and then I’ll be impressed.

    Thumb up Thumb down +53

  27. Chrisnyc1213
    March 17, 2010 at 1:45 pm

    Postcards from the edge…of the trashcan.

    Thumb up Thumb down +52

  28. buffoon
    March 17, 2010 at 1:45 pm

    Question. If it is shitter than the original, would that not be “downcycled”?

    Thumb up Thumb down +60

  29. Jea
    March 17, 2010 at 1:45 pm

    These aren’t eco friendly.

    These aren’t friendly at all.

    Thumb up Thumb down +35

  30. X Random Snarker X
    March 17, 2010 at 1:46 pm

    I have seen people make business cards on the cheap this way, for thier funky silkscreened shirts, but who the hell would BUY anything like this?! At least if you’re doing this to make business cards that half the people who take one will throw out, it makes some sence, but aren’t post cards meant to be kept? Hence the pretty picture normally right where the granola bar or in this case douche picture is…

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  31. Skully
    March 17, 2010 at 1:47 pm

    Seller was proabably inspired by Carrie Fisher’s “Postcards from the Fridge.”

    Thumb up Thumb down +27

  32. Wilma Fingerdoo
    March 17, 2010 at 1:49 pm

    Dear Mom and Dad,

    The trip to Cascadian Farms sucked. All they fed us were some crappy granola bars.
    Next time please send us to an actual location and we will send you a real postcard.
    Thanks,
    Junior

    Thumb up Thumb down +49

  33. Fartinamitten
    March 17, 2010 at 1:49 pm

    About 25 years ago, while back-packing thru Italy, my cousin and I made a post card from a Tampax box because we thought the word “tamponi” was awesome! We were so ahead of our time.

    Thumb up Thumb down +92

  34. IscreamUscream
    March 17, 2010 at 1:49 pm

    @Raz, yeah…or if they really wanted to be “green”, just make two blank sides and get a “convo” going….
    You: “check your email box please…”
    a week later…
    Them: “What? Which email?”

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  35. AnotherPersonsTrash
    March 17, 2010 at 1:52 pm

    I actually do use boxes to make tracers for the kids so they don’t ask me 17 million times a day to draw a heart/circle/egg/leaf. It holds up better than regular paper. I just would never think of sending them off in the mail.

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  36. leftfoot
    March 17, 2010 at 1:52 pm

    sometimes i randomly send postcards to complete strangers. Usually they are something pretty, positive and uplifting, but I’m rethinking that decision as I type.

    Thumb up Thumb down +20

  37. methuselah
    March 17, 2010 at 1:53 pm

    This seller’s shop includes a card with a photo she took in Paris and envelopes made from a Tiffany catalog she couldn’t bear to throw out. So she can afford to travel abroad, buy pricey baubles and shop organic, then thinks people want to buy her trash? Fuck her.

    Thumb up Thumb down +74

  38. hamoza
    March 17, 2010 at 1:56 pm

    Whoa , what an assortmant in this little dream of a shop,from scripture miscellany to envelopes made from a Tiffany catalogue. I’ll take the Massengil set please.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  39. geektastic
    March 17, 2010 at 1:56 pm

    Ooo, I’m a pharmacist, so I could save boxes from prescription drugs. Vaginal inserts=get yourself checked, Seroquel=you need to adjust your “meds”, Viagra=…

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  40. taffymcclure
    March 17, 2010 at 1:57 pm

    I think I just upcycled my lunch.

    Thumb up Thumb down +50

  41. MadGypsy
    March 17, 2010 at 1:57 pm

    #37, That was well said. Fuck her indeed.

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  42. Skully
    March 17, 2010 at 1:57 pm

    HK: just read your douche card, hilarious!
    ChrisNYC: Sorry, I didn’t mean to steal your joke, I’ll send you a nice card made from a Count Chocula box.

    Thumb up Thumb down +17

  43. Yzziefrog
    March 17, 2010 at 1:58 pm

    Well, had I known, I would have save all my boxes and made a fortune with this item:

    http://i175.photobucket.com/albums/w156/Yzziefrog/Regretsy/regretsynewpostcard.jpg

    Thumb up Thumb down +64

  44. kittyofassisi
    March 17, 2010 at 2:01 pm

    Oh for CHRIST SAKE!

    You are going to get me in trouble at work! I almost squirted Fresca out my nose AGAIN!

    Here’s to sweet smelling crotches! woohoo!

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  45. SuperSnark
    March 17, 2010 at 2:08 pm

    HK version Perfection!

    As for the actual etsy item yeah right do they think we are all to lazy to do it ourselves??

    Damn! recyle day is today, guess I can’t be crafty

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  46. Stretch65
    March 17, 2010 at 2:13 pm

    Its called a DISPOSIBLE douche. Don’t try to use any part of it again

    Thumb up Thumb down +17

  47. hamoza
    March 17, 2010 at 2:16 pm

    The misuse of all of the eco friendly bullshit really gets my gall up. By the time it is mailed & takes energy to deliver to the lucky recipient , it hardly is ecologically sound. When you care to spare the very best , send email .

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  48. Yzziefrog
    March 17, 2010 at 2:16 pm
  49. voxwoman
    March 17, 2010 at 2:22 pm

    I’ve smiled and snorted a few times in the past, but this post along with the comments has me guffawing!

    I know I have a “post card” rubber stamp somewhere…. Now I can upcycle the box for the adult diapers I had to get for my dad.

    Thumb up Thumb down +22

  50. starrydreams
    March 17, 2010 at 2:24 pm

    Shipping is only $2!!!!! Wow!!!

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

  51. IscreamUscream
    March 17, 2010 at 2:26 pm

    :lol: all the photoshops…I think I’ll take the day off.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  52. voxwoman
    March 17, 2010 at 2:27 pm

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -5

  53. hamoza
    March 17, 2010 at 2:36 pm

    One womans trash is anothers um, trash.
    But sure is awesome fodder for a snortathon.

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

  54. geektastic
    March 17, 2010 at 2:38 pm

    “#52 voxwoman :
    http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=33638458
    what the hell is “sea glass”? Is it a piece of a broken Rolling Rock bottle that’s been sanded down by waves?”

    Yes, exactly. It’s used in jewelry and similar fuckery. You can also buy beads and pendants made to look like sea glass. I guess if you found it on your vacation, it would have some sentimental value, but it’s pretty much just smooth frosted chunks of beer bottles.

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  55. Wilma Fingerdoo
    March 17, 2010 at 2:40 pm

    This postcard should be mailed in an envelope filled with loose glitter.

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  56. Skully
    March 17, 2010 at 3:02 pm

    HK, your postcard reminded me of this ad from the ’70′s:

    http://twitpic.com/197cuf

    Thumb up Thumb down +25

  57. Yzziefrog
    March 17, 2010 at 3:07 pm
  58. twatsupcock
    March 17, 2010 at 3:30 pm

    I am laughing and so is my nice clean pussy!!!!!

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  59. StinkBait
    March 17, 2010 at 3:34 pm

    At least it’s only two dollars.

    That was me trying to be nice.

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  60. PussDaddy
    March 17, 2010 at 3:48 pm

    Sell your trash on Etsy!

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  61. blondeweezie
    March 17, 2010 at 4:01 pm

    Oy. There’s got to be a limit to “upcycling”. What next- condom box bird feeders?
    Oops. I just gave someone an idea, I’m sure.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  62. Vile & Evil Debbie Downer
    March 17, 2010 at 4:03 pm

    Damn, missed out on a brilliant Valentine’s Day card opportunity:

    http://twitpic.com/197rus

    Thumb up Thumb down +25

  63. sudabaki©
    March 17, 2010 at 4:07 pm

    Nothing can top #42 Yzziefrog but here’s my contribution.

    http://www.flickr.com/photos/36532708@N00/4441248489/

    Thumb up Thumb down +15

  64. mtopia
    March 17, 2010 at 4:08 pm

    This reminds me of a Cheerios commercial:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch#!v=DRlPMnEIE-4&feature=related
    That kid puts that Vancouver 2010 stamp on with a vengeance: it is a full-body sticker application.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  65. mtopia
    March 17, 2010 at 4:11 pm
  66. hamoza
    March 17, 2010 at 4:14 pm

    #62 VEDD, Hilarious!There is always next year…

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  67. hamoza
    March 17, 2010 at 4:17 pm

    #61 blondeweezie-not to worry-it has been ‘covered’-see @Yzzyfrog, #47.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  68. hamoza
    March 17, 2010 at 4:19 pm

    sorry , meant # 42 Yzzyfrog

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  69. Bratfink
    March 17, 2010 at 4:21 pm

    I have officially died laughing over Helen’s Massengill picture. There can’t be a way to top that.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  70. geektastic
    March 17, 2010 at 4:30 pm
  71. Radical Militant Librarian
    March 17, 2010 at 5:34 pm

    #42 Yzziefrog

    Too fucking funny! (Pun intended…)

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  72. NedTheDeadInRed
    March 17, 2010 at 6:50 pm

    OK, there is nothing to top the Massengil postcard…but #42 comes pretty freakin’ close!

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  73. IscreamUscream
    March 17, 2010 at 6:53 pm

    @VEDD :lol: A lot of these would be great FU cards.

    As comments go, I’m putting my vote in for Suda’s #23

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  74. geektastic
    March 17, 2010 at 7:09 pm

    Yes! #23 for COTD.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  75. The Runaway Lawyer
    March 17, 2010 at 10:09 pm

    On a side note, those vanilla chip organic granola bars are terribly yummy. I bought a box for my kids yesterday and um…someone…apparantly ate them all.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  76. clitty’s got claws
    March 17, 2010 at 11:52 pm

    There’s a reason why food boxes as such are recyclable…

    And OMG! The photoshops have me laughing so hard! All of those have many useful situations, unlike the subject of this post.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  77. Jez
    March 18, 2010 at 1:51 am

    Oh dear, someone has bought them. That’s… really sort of confusing, actually.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  78. Dix
    March 18, 2010 at 6:20 am

    I just nearly drowned in my tea! Hilarious!

    On the other hand, now I know what to do with those Shiner cartons. Cut them up and mail them to my brother!

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  79. eternalgreenknight
    March 18, 2010 at 7:34 am

    I’d totally send a massangill post-card to my friend in basic right now! That’d be great! LOL
    Now I’m going to be going to the store looking for boxes that would make funny “upcycled” post-cards!

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  80. Stretch65
    March 18, 2010 at 8:02 am

    #23
    Massingill: Wish you were here

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  81. AreYouGoingToEatThatPickle
    March 18, 2010 at 9:45 am

    #64 sudabaki© : NOT FUNNY! LOL I’m home with the Chicken Pox (at 29y/o). When I went to the doctor, he wrote me an Rx to prevent it from getting worse. I didn’t look at it until I got to my car, when I realized it was for Valtrex. Apparently the Pox are a type of herpes.

    I was embarassed taking it to the pharmacy, so when I got to the counter, I proclaimed loud and clear “I HAVE THE CHICKEN POX”. I’m sure i’m not the first person to do this – they all looked up and laughed! LOL

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  82. Wilma Fingerdoo
    March 18, 2010 at 12:50 pm

    #82 AreYouGoingToEatThatPickle:
    That’s awesome!
    My sister’s dog got skunked really bad once and after all the usual treatments failed, the vet suggested giving the dog a bath in douche. Unfortunately, she needed to buy some 12 boxes of the stuff for her 110 lb. lab. She tried to explain to the cashier that it wasn’t for her, but she swears they look at her strange now….as do I.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  83. sudabaki©
    March 18, 2010 at 1:18 pm

    Oh Pickle, I’m so sorry. If I had your address I’d send you an actual postcard so even the mailman would look at you funny. :lol:

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  84. AreYouGoingToEatThatPickle
    March 18, 2010 at 8:09 pm

    The mail man (I actually have a mail lady) already looks at me funny… I have two different and distinct last names from before and after my divorce, am forever receiving my ex’s mail which I leave outside the box for her to take back, in addition to mail from the previous 3 homeowners (all male) that never bothered to change their address.

    ….she probably thinks I’m the village bicycle; everybody gets a ride!

    The valtrex postcard would not help my case! ;)

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  85. AreYouGoingToEatThatPickle
    March 18, 2010 at 8:09 pm

    ….as for the douche; you sure it was her lab and not her pussy that got skunked? lol

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  86. sudabaki©
    March 18, 2010 at 10:56 pm

    #85 AreYouGoingToEatThatPickle: Damn, that was so unPC of me. And here on Regretsy of all places.

    “….she probably thinks I’m the village bicycle;”

    I love that expression! And who the hell would give you a thumbs down for that?? Totally made me snort.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  87. Meta
    July 12, 2011 at 10:02 pm

    I love how eco-friendly this will be! I can’t wait to get a big bubble wrap lined envelope with this eco-friendly card in it so I can throw away all that plastic-y packaging and send this eco-friendly UNIQUE post card to someone!

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

    • Meta
      July 12, 2011 at 10:02 pm

      Especially when I could just send them an e-mail.

      Thumb up Thumb down 0

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