If this is a self portrait, the artist might want to see a doctor and find out why his penis is gray. Either that or it’s an alien penis. Either way, it disturbs me.
At least we know shes seen one.
The artist says her hubby is her biggest inspiration. Possibly more info than I need & I don’t wanna be a member of that painting club.
Recovering Crack Baby
February 22, 2010 at 10:27 am
#41 blondeweezie : #39 liddykitter
Her husband has a grey penis with a moustache? I’d take him to the ER.
I’d take him everywhere and charge for a peek at it. Have a big fucking painted picture of it on his back that says- Wanna See if this is real- 10.00- wanna feel 15.00- want a portrait 20 bucks.
@ #45, speaking of Puppetry of the Penis, I interviewed them years ago on the radio. It’s at the top of the third hour if you want to listen. They actually stripped down and did tricks for me in the studio. It was memorable.
I know. It’s like a doll crack house (just scatter some needles on the floor).
I like her too. At least she has an imagination. (NOTE: there are no clay pot dolls in the doll crack house.)
Recovering Crack Baby
February 22, 2010 at 11:15 am
#55 Helen Killer : @ #45, speaking of Puppetry of the Penis, I interviewed them years ago on the radio. It’s at the top of the third hour if you want to listen. They actually stripped own and did tricks for me in the studio. It was memorable
OH Helen- I knew you would break down someday and give us a glance into your checkered past.
Wilma & Helen: They have the “Puppetry” play here in LA, right down the street from where I live. A couple of friends of mine & I are going to make it a girl’s night out, since our SO’s are too squeamish.
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=38450774
Ah, the Elvis dolphin. Fortunately, they didn’t show his latter years, which included him being bloated from too many krill & peanut butter sandwiches, and his untimely demise, floating upside down.
#79 blondeweezie- Enjoy!
Our drunk bus of ladies had a blast. We had an extra ticket so we picked up a blow up man at the adult store. He looks exactly like Tiger Woods. They said we couldn’t bring him in but we had a ticket for him. Had to cover up his 9 inch cock with some Mr. Goodbar underwear that said “I’m nuts for you” (they were Betty’s). Not like we weren’t going to see live dick or anything.
ah, I can never get enough penis.Yes this reminded me of Puppetry of the Penis. Thanks Wilma for ratting me out. My family still thinks I saw Mama Mia the musical. Oh and Wilma kept that inflated penis in her house for Thanksgiving and all the teenagers discovered him in her closet!!
Look, all I wnt to know is, is the stand included with the painting? I’ll be damned if I’m gonna display a pooly painted cockman in my fucking family room with improper “standage”.
@#104: I actually finished that Dalek a long time ago (i.e. Summer 2008). There’s a ton of pictures of it on my Flickr…just click the tag “dalek”. You may have seen it coming out of the crotch of my skants.
I’ve actually made two more Daleks since then based on the Supreme Dalek seen in the fourth season finale. One of those went to Jess of Ravelry, and the other one went to my father as a sympathy present after we had to put our first cat down earlier this month.
February 22, 2010 at 9:34 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
February 22, 2010 at 9:37 am
Nothing about that is even remotely like an actual penis should look.
February 22, 2010 at 9:37 am
I’m also spelling challenged.
February 22, 2010 at 9:38 am
#2 TooMany……
Thanks god for that.
February 22, 2010 at 9:40 am
It looks like this penis has a case of snowman envy.
February 22, 2010 at 9:42 am
why would a penis painting hold an umbrella? oh yeah, for golden showers!
February 22, 2010 at 9:42 am
Pathetic painting of Parisian Penis painting poorly.
February 22, 2010 at 9:43 am
I’ll never watch a Rankin and Bass Christmas special the same way again. DAMN you Etsy!
February 22, 2010 at 9:43 am
Mais bien sûr! Il s’agit d’un pénis français! N’est-ce pas vrai?
February 22, 2010 at 9:43 am
Just another Sunday penis painter.
February 22, 2010 at 9:45 am
Great. “Have a Holly Jolly Christmas” will never have the same meaning again…
February 22, 2010 at 9:45 am
But did the artist paint this with HIS penis?
Oh, Gawd, what am I saying? I DO NOT want to know!
February 22, 2010 at 9:47 am
Penises don’t have arms.
February 22, 2010 at 9:47 am
I don’t have a penis but if I did I would never sit on my balls.
February 22, 2010 at 9:48 am
He should stick to something simple like writing his name in the snow.
February 22, 2010 at 9:48 am
Holly Jolly hardon? HK, you make math fun!
Great painting, best Pubist work I’ve seen since the Prickasso exhibit last year.
February 22, 2010 at 9:49 am
Why would a penis (if it really could paint) paint Marry Poppins holding her purse.
February 22, 2010 at 9:49 am
#6 creepydolls – i’m wondering less about why the penis in the painting has an umbrella and more about why it’s holding a cauldron.
February 22, 2010 at 9:53 am
Does the artist who painted the penis, who is painting anouther penis, have a penis?
February 22, 2010 at 9:54 am
If this is a self portrait, the artist might want to see a doctor and find out why his penis is gray. Either that or it’s an alien penis. Either way, it disturbs me.
February 22, 2010 at 9:55 am
@#17 RCB: Good question, maybe he’s painting Mary Poppin’ a boner.
February 22, 2010 at 9:57 am
Well I see he practices safety since he has a cap on it.
February 22, 2010 at 9:58 am
Do you think it’s painted to scale?
on a 5×7 canvas?
February 22, 2010 at 9:58 am
#22 SKULLY- I did not see that part in the movie. You must have the special features one.
February 22, 2010 at 9:59 am
It’s Burl Ives’ penis!
February 22, 2010 at 10:02 am
#25 biggles5 – They say he liked to call it Big Daddy…
February 22, 2010 at 10:04 am
Mature content?
Not hardly!
February 22, 2010 at 10:05 am
Better than an artistic vagina, I guess.
February 22, 2010 at 10:07 am
Has the artist ever actually seen a penis?
February 22, 2010 at 10:09 am
Well, we know the artist is really a dick.
He had to have balls to paint that.
Somebody stop me.. PLEASE.
February 22, 2010 at 10:10 am
Dedicated to Burl Ives:
He’s a holly jolly penis,
Not sure why his skin is gray.
Oh my God,
He shot his wad
And filled up his beret!
February 22, 2010 at 10:10 am
Clearly,the artist is nuts.
DAMMIT.
February 22, 2010 at 10:10 am
Vincent Van Cogh
Pee-Peerre-Auguste Renoir
Dicasso
Salvador Dilli
February 22, 2010 at 10:11 am
HK- to funny- love the Regretsy math. Makes me want to go outside and make some snowballs.
February 22, 2010 at 10:12 am
Wonder if he fell asleep after he finished?
AND THAT’S THE LAST ONE, I PROMISE.
February 22, 2010 at 10:13 am
I’m confused…….. the penis in the painting has a purse and an umbrella and is floating in the sky.
A reference to Mary-Pop-Ins?
February 22, 2010 at 10:14 am
#28 Lexiii :
Better than an artistic vagina, I guess.
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=40440201
No, not really.
February 22, 2010 at 10:15 am
I have NEVER seen a penis who could also give mustache ride.
I would be all over that like a D&D player is to their die.
February 22, 2010 at 10:16 am
At least we know shes seen one.
The artist says her hubby is her biggest inspiration. Possibly more info than I need & I don’t wanna be a member of that painting club.
February 22, 2010 at 10:19 am
I got it! This is a painting about Dicktation!
February 22, 2010 at 10:20 am
#39 liddykitter
Her husband has a grey penis with a moustache? I’d take him to the ER.
February 22, 2010 at 10:24 am
Dickensonian drek.
A determined etsy shopper could have a different dick in every room.
February 22, 2010 at 10:26 am
#41 blonde I think they both need to be seen ….
February 22, 2010 at 10:27 am
#41 blondeweezie : #39 liddykitter
Her husband has a grey penis with a moustache? I’d take him to the ER.
I’d take him everywhere and charge for a peek at it. Have a big fucking painted picture of it on his back that says- Wanna See if this is real- 10.00- wanna feel 15.00- want a portrait 20 bucks.
February 22, 2010 at 10:29 am
A painting penis? That would really bring the crowds. And I thought “Puppetry of the Penis” was unusual.
February 22, 2010 at 10:29 am
#44 RCB & # 41 BW:
He def. needs a pube job.
February 22, 2010 at 10:31 am
@31 Skully
I’ll just give up on being snarky on this one.
February 22, 2010 at 10:32 am
this is sure giving frosty a run for his money!
this is one of the funniest regretsy math depictions, ever
February 22, 2010 at 10:32 am
#44 her vagina appears to have a moustache too.http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=40440201
February 22, 2010 at 10:34 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
February 22, 2010 at 10:37 am
The Regresty math is so fantastic, I shudder to think what the VIIA could be…
And Skully, thanks. I’ll be singing that all day. I simultaneously love you and hate you.
February 22, 2010 at 10:38 am
hey, this gal is a regretsy fan!
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=40652826
damn, so she won’t even be offended or pissed that she is here! no drama…LOL
February 22, 2010 at 10:38 am
Her whole idea of what a body should look like is a little off. I’m fairly certain my boobs don’t look like that from the back. http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=18120835
February 22, 2010 at 10:40 am
Pee-culiar. Maybe it has a purse & umbrella because it’s a girl penis.
Would love to see it in a room, with nuns.
February 22, 2010 at 10:43 am
@ #45, speaking of Puppetry of the Penis, I interviewed them years ago on the radio. It’s at the top of the third hour if you want to listen. They actually stripped down and did tricks for me in the studio. It was memorable.
February 22, 2010 at 10:43 am
Thanks, Helen. I can never watch Rudolph the Red nosed Reindeer the same way again. Burl Ives is forever tainted as a penis painting a penis.
February 22, 2010 at 10:43 am
that made me laugh
February 22, 2010 at 10:45 am
#52 Raz How cool! She suggests taking her ‘say what’ tote to church.Maybe I do want to be a member of that church.
February 22, 2010 at 10:45 am
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=24148274
this anatomy is a bit screwy…is she getting banged from the front or the back? it’s like an optical illusion…
February 22, 2010 at 10:45 am
Helen, we just saw the Puppetry of the Penis at the Keswick. My sister, Betty Machette, bought the book for her husband as his Christmas present!
Did they show you the hamburger? That’s my favorite.
February 22, 2010 at 10:45 am
#18 it is a cauldron! hahahhahaha
wasn’t a caluldron painting with a witch featured on regretsy before?
February 22, 2010 at 10:48 am
Can I get this as a tripdick?
February 22, 2010 at 10:49 am
So many snowball jokes, so little time.
February 22, 2010 at 10:49 am
Skully, RCB and all you have are cracking me up. I’ll sit this one out and wait for the next one.
February 22, 2010 at 10:51 am
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=24489526
My personal favorite. Words escape me. I want it.
February 22, 2010 at 10:57 am
@59 Raz, yeah…wassup there?
The VIR for that should be a chiro office.
February 22, 2010 at 11:00 am
#65 Wilma F
I like that too-there are 100 prints so we can all have one. The more I read her stuff the more I like her in a funny kind of way.
February 22, 2010 at 11:01 am
Someone was inspired by the movie Superbad. Now THAT’S quality penis art.
February 22, 2010 at 11:05 am
#67 littykidder-
I know. It’s like a doll crack house (just scatter some needles on the floor).
I like her too. At least she has an imagination. (NOTE: there are no clay pot dolls in the doll crack house.)
February 22, 2010 at 11:09 am
Alas, the seller did it again. They put their dick in it.
February 22, 2010 at 11:10 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
February 22, 2010 at 11:15 am
#55 Helen Killer : @ #45, speaking of Puppetry of the Penis, I interviewed them years ago on the radio. It’s at the top of the third hour if you want to listen. They actually stripped own and did tricks for me in the studio. It was memorable
OH Helen- I knew you would break down someday and give us a glance into your checkered past.
February 22, 2010 at 11:20 am
I’d like to view in a room, please.
February 22, 2010 at 11:25 am
one more: Dali Jolly Penis
http://i985.photobucket.com/albums/ae338/grinreaper1965/Regretsy/dalijolly.jpg
February 22, 2010 at 11:33 am
#74 Skully : one more: Dali Jolly Penis
I would so buy that if I knew where it has been.
February 22, 2010 at 11:36 am
Too funny. He’s a happy looking penis!
February 22, 2010 at 11:38 am
#76 starrydreams :
I don’t ever recall seeing a penis that was not happy. Now I wonder if their are unhappy penises out there.
February 22, 2010 at 11:40 am
SKULLY- I have a special order- can you do the giant elephants and hang this down from them?
February 22, 2010 at 11:40 am
Wilma & Helen: They have the “Puppetry” play here in LA, right down the street from where I live. A couple of friends of mine & I are going to make it a girl’s night out, since our SO’s are too squeamish.
February 22, 2010 at 11:41 am
Aaahaha..yeah seen this one before….heh.
Hooray for Regretsy Math
February 22, 2010 at 11:41 am
#77 – Without revealing too much of my checkered past, I have seen a few unhappy penises!
February 22, 2010 at 11:45 am
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=38450774
Ah, the Elvis dolphin. Fortunately, they didn’t show his latter years, which included him being bloated from too many krill & peanut butter sandwiches, and his untimely demise, floating upside down.
February 22, 2010 at 11:45 am
Yo Penis Obsession, I’m happy for you, I’ma let you finish, but Sir Reginald Balzac is the best penis-related handcraft of all time!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/spiritinaphotograph/2317798513
(No, I did not name my Beanis…credit for that goes to some lovely LSGer.)
February 22, 2010 at 11:46 am
This is the cutest regretsy math ever!! I think another combo could be with the Poppin Fresh Dough Boy!!
February 22, 2010 at 11:47 am
#79 blondeweezie- Enjoy!
Our drunk bus of ladies had a blast. We had an extra ticket so we picked up a blow up man at the adult store. He looks exactly like Tiger Woods. They said we couldn’t bring him in but we had a ticket for him. Had to cover up his 9 inch cock with some Mr. Goodbar underwear that said “I’m nuts for you” (they were Betty’s). Not like we weren’t going to see live dick or anything.
February 22, 2010 at 11:51 am
RCB: The last time I tried to do a giant elephant they threw me out of the zoo.
February 22, 2010 at 11:52 am
Actually, I *would* pay $20 to see a penis that could paint its own self portrait.
February 22, 2010 at 11:54 am
Never seen an unhappy penis?
Just say ‘no’ and voila – unhappy penis!
February 22, 2010 at 11:55 am
#87 lilprincess Actually I’d pay $20 just to see a happy penis right about now…
February 22, 2010 at 11:56 am
It’s a good thing the balls aren’t hairy. That could create a mobility problem.
February 22, 2010 at 12:11 pm
I wonder if her husband has the good sense to be embarassed at having been credited as the model.
February 22, 2010 at 12:11 pm
I suck at math, so don’t sue me–it’s “art”
http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4042/4379336095_2d212e6fc0_o.jpg
–IscreamUscream, painter of dreck
February 22, 2010 at 12:12 pm
http://www.epicfail.com/index.php?s=elephant&search.x=26&search.y=14
SKULLY- the second pic- what is the name of your lookout guy- if he got you caught I don’t want to hire him when I go.
February 22, 2010 at 12:12 pm
#88 spandy :
Never seen an unhappy penis?
I think they have Viagra for that!
February 22, 2010 at 12:15 pm
OMG! It’s Frosty the Double Amputee! You know that song, don’t you? It goes:
Frosty the snowman
Was a double amputee
So he painted art
With all his heart
And ended up on Regretsy.
February 22, 2010 at 12:16 pm
ah, I can never get enough penis.Yes this reminded me of Puppetry of the Penis. Thanks Wilma for ratting me out. My family still thinks I saw Mama Mia the musical. Oh and Wilma kept that inflated penis in her house for Thanksgiving and all the teenagers discovered him in her closet!!
February 22, 2010 at 12:19 pm
Agreed, this is obviously a homage to Sam the Snowman in Rudolf! X)))
February 22, 2010 at 12:19 pm
Go on BettyMachete tell us more. ESP. about that blow-up doll.
February 22, 2010 at 12:24 pm
#71 It’s from Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.
February 22, 2010 at 12:27 pm
I wonder if the model is wearing a “raincoat” with that umbrella?
Here’s some more math………..raincoat = condom
I made myself giggle……..
February 22, 2010 at 12:31 pm
@#92 ISUS: LOL! (I thought that was Thomas Kinkade, but I had to double check.)
February 22, 2010 at 12:33 pm
@Skully–glad somebody got it.
Anybody, “convo me” if you want the scoop on this guy.
February 22, 2010 at 12:36 pm
#95 BettyMachete :
ah, I can never get enough penis.
That makes 2 of us! LOL!
February 22, 2010 at 12:44 pm
@#83, I NEED that Dalek once it’s done. OMG, I nearly shit myself.
and @#92, That made my day. I loathe Kinkade.
February 22, 2010 at 12:48 pm
@Sculptor69–me too. It makes the worst Etsy scammer look benign.
February 22, 2010 at 12:53 pm
Look, all I wnt to know is, is the stand included with the painting? I’ll be damned if I’m gonna display a pooly painted cockman in my fucking family room with improper “standage”.
February 22, 2010 at 1:07 pm
#53 SloGin :
Her whole idea of what a body should look like is a little off. I’m fairly certain my boobs don’t look like that from the back. http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=18120835
Maybe she’s lying on her stomach?
February 22, 2010 at 1:44 pm
I always thought Burl Ives was a dick!
February 22, 2010 at 3:02 pm
I love Dali. We have a print of the elephants in our living room. Late to the party today but here’s a little something anyhoo. I think i will blow this up and hang it with my other Dalis:
http://i761.photobucket.com/albums/xx256/geektastic_whimsy/Regretsy%20NSFW/dali_fuckery.png
February 22, 2010 at 4:28 pm
#109. geektastic! u da bomb!!!!
February 22, 2010 at 8:24 pm
@#104: I actually finished that Dalek a long time ago (i.e. Summer 2008). There’s a ton of pictures of it on my Flickr…just click the tag “dalek”. You may have seen it coming out of the crotch of my skants.
I’ve actually made two more Daleks since then based on the Supreme Dalek seen in the fourth season finale. One of those went to Jess of Ravelry, and the other one went to my father as a sympathy present after we had to put our first cat down earlier this month.
February 22, 2010 at 9:02 pm
I kidd you not, at first glance I thought that *actually was* a painting of the dood from the misfit island… then I scrolled down.
February 22, 2010 at 9:05 pm
Despite mocking mr. penispainter earlier, after combing through her shop, I’ve gotta’ say I <3
this sellers goodies.
February 22, 2010 at 9:14 pm
“Now we’re going to paint a happy little penis with a happy little umbrella.”
February 23, 2010 at 6:56 am
Why are paintings listed as “mature” always so juvenile?
February 23, 2010 at 12:06 pm
Hm. Is this the “belly button witch” artist being featured again? Some of her stuff looks familiar…
Oh, and there is also a vagina obsession painting for sale, if anyone’s interested.
#115 Dix: hahaha! I thought the exact same thing at first!