I love that some poor unsuspecting crafter commits a simple typo and a BANG a clusterfuck of craptastic fuckery is born… a circle jerk ensues, photshoppers everywhere start working furiously, inside jokes are born, the possibilities are endless… I live for these moments. You and Bronc have outdone yourselves. I tip my speculum to you.
Well at least we can surmise that the oft prophesied WW3 will not destroy the world, apparently. The future soldiers have come to us in their moose-pulled sleigh time machines and have left buttons to give us hope for the future. Thank you, brave future Canucks. I have but one question: if it is from the future, is it REALLY vintage?
There are no words for how much I love you right now Helen. How the hell do you come up with this stuff? I think if that were really a movie it would definitely break box-office records. Any chance the Darth Vader/bad guy is played by Sarah Palin? It just seems fitting.
Oh and #19, I’m trying to press your thumbs up button, but its not working.
“That is the funniest thing I have seen in a long time. I just love the idea that WW11 is a Canada-only thing. World? Nah, just Canada.”
Canada conquered the world in World War X, after the collapse of the New New Zealand Empire, brought about by having to pay massive War Reparations to the Federal Republic of Antartica, who seized power in World War VIII. Even a loan from the Pan Austrian-Australian Co-Prosperity Sphere couldn’t bail them out.
Ok thank god I have an iPod touch now because I couldn’t comment or view comments without it. That movie was spectacular!! The opening sequence was awesome sauce. Kudos to bronc for taking this to level 20!!
As for the button, be it from the future or past, there’s one way for sure to find it if its brass… try using a little bit of brass polish on it. Just sayin’…
@#34 EXACTLY. As someone who has lived in Saskatchewan for all of her life (minus four months spent in Winnipeg), I am proud, nay, ecstatic, that it was spelled right!
In fact, I had so expected it to be spelled wrong that I had double checked to make sure my eyes were not deceiving me the first time around as I was laughing too hard.
There is only one question that remains: who would win – the Saskatchewan pirates or the Saskatchewan spies?
@ #26 captaincavegirl: I really like merci beaucop better. It makes me think of a full-on renegade mercenary from the Yukon TerritorY (<<<) who drinks beer that's better than Moosehead and fucks all kinds of Canadian shit up in what will be known as the Great Fuckery War: WW11.
and as a P.S to all ‘yall Americans… I have never heard anyone here say “hoser”, seen a team of dogs pulling a sled, seen a real beaver, or snow in August…
I was so dissapointed when my cousin from the U.S asked if it was cold here, in July, and if our cops all ride horses… So sad so sad…
#45
Yeah, and I’ve got a pet beaver! I do however like the Bloc Quebecois refrence, though we’d be glad to get rid of the frenchies… Them and thier not withstanding clause which lets them have signs only in french, while we have to have EVERYTHING in both french and english. You’d think that they’d be able to figure out directions like east and west, afterall in french its est and ouest. Enough of that, I’d better shut up before the Quebecois, and Americans boycot my products!! ; )
#43 efit so sorry, but y’all is spelled “y’all”. The apostrophy is in the place of “ou”. While I’m at it, being the punctuation police, hear this: nothing is pluralized with apostrophe s. NOTHING. (this is not aimed at you, efit). That is all.
Oh my god, that was classic. If this gets overlooked by the Academy, there should be an uprising.
But now the question arises, in 20 years when technology catches up with her vision will Helen release a remake with CGI 3D animation?
re: the listing posted in #19- from the text of that “Germen Luger Holster”: “The gun is now legally with my step son” (explaining why the gun isn’t being sold with the holster, I guess?)….
This statement left me with many questions: Why the need to point out the gun’s “legal” status? Did the step son win it from the family in a lawsuit, perhaps? Is she (the seller) NOT legally allowed to own a gun, for reasons I can only imagine?
You know, I’ve been arguing for years that The Red Green Show and Doctor Who are really the same program. (Odd costumes, vehicles that can hold more shit on the inside than it appears on the outside, and a complete disregard for continuity if there’s an opportunity for a sight gag.) If this button was from World War 11, then we have an explanation. “Remember, if the Sontarans don’t find you handsome, they should at least find you handy.”
AreYouGoingToEatThatPickle
February 11, 2010 at 3:59 pm
LOL! It’s like you filled in a mad-lib with the only Canadian things you knew!
…and to you ‘mercan Regretsians, you have NOOO idea how much of a kick we get out of the US media and entertainment business making fun of us. We make fun of you for making fun of us because you think you’re making fun of us, and we’re actually flattered!
AreYouGoingToEatThatPickle
February 11, 2010 at 4:29 pm
….oh, on a side note, they shoot a TON of blockbuster films around my office because the funding and tax credits that our government gives are astounding. You should apply to the National Film Board of Canada for a grant to put this into production!
Have you ever laughed so hard that you can’t breathe, and you just let out a high-pitched “squee” sound? Yeah. I was almost just suffocated by laughter, but it was worth it.
Was daydreaming as to what might compel Canada to participate in the upcoming World War 11…..the U.S. forced them to use ketchup instead of gravy on their fries?
AreYouGoingToEatThatPickle
February 12, 2010 at 2:33 pm
@#102 HelenaHandbasket: It’s not just gravy – first we put cheese on our fries, then pour gravy on top to melt the cheese into a gooey mess of artery clogging goodness!
February 11, 2010 at 9:24 am
It’s from the future!
February 11, 2010 at 9:25 am
Holy fuck. I want to have your babies.
February 11, 2010 at 9:30 am
I love that some poor unsuspecting crafter commits a simple typo and a BANG a clusterfuck of craptastic fuckery is born… a circle jerk ensues, photshoppers everywhere start working furiously, inside jokes are born, the possibilities are endless… I live for these moments. You and Bronc have outdone yourselves. I tip my speculum to you.
February 11, 2010 at 9:31 am
…a BANG… Who knew I was Italian?
February 11, 2010 at 9:31 am
If you laugh for 2 whole minutes straight – bits of you hurt and your family think you have lost it.
February 11, 2010 at 9:34 am
I would watch the fuck out of this movie.
February 11, 2010 at 9:36 am
George Lucas had Joseph Campbell.
All Helen Killer needed was a button.
February 11, 2010 at 9:36 am
I love it when you have time on your hands…..
February 11, 2010 at 9:38 am
OMG too fucking funny I live to check regretsy everyday it rescues me from the mundane art of crafting mucked up funny shit
February 11, 2010 at 9:38 am
Actually that should read,
George Lucas was inspired by Joseph Campbell. All Helen Killer needed was a button.
I’ll revise it before my Film Threat writeup.
February 11, 2010 at 9:38 am
Well at least we can surmise that the oft prophesied WW3 will not destroy the world, apparently. The future soldiers have come to us in their moose-pulled sleigh time machines and have left buttons to give us hope for the future. Thank you, brave future Canucks. I have but one question: if it is from the future, is it REALLY vintage?
February 11, 2010 at 9:41 am
Well this just put “view it in a room” in the shade. Kudos Helen! I give it a fae glitter Oscar of whimsicle in the category of fuckery!
February 11, 2010 at 9:41 am
Can’t wait for the sequel!
February 11, 2010 at 9:41 am
@ #11, I’d go back in time to flag it, but I don’t want to fuck with the prime directive.
February 11, 2010 at 9:46 am
That is the funniest thing I have seen in a long time. I just love the idea that WW11 is a Canada-only thing. World? Nah, just Canada.
February 11, 2010 at 9:47 am
grrr…cant watch in in germany because of copyright fuckery. i bet it’s gorgeous though.
February 11, 2010 at 9:48 am
Amazing! As a Canadian, I find this utterly hilarious.
We do have better beer than Moosehead, though.
February 11, 2010 at 9:49 am
Oh my word. You have combined my absolute geeky love of Star Wars with my inappropriate love of fuckery. I am in heaven today.
February 11, 2010 at 9:50 am
Love it! This will really mess with the Space-Time Continuum; it’s from the past in the future, where there are “Germen Leather Holsters”:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=35026503
February 11, 2010 at 9:50 am
Wow, Helen, this is great, but I have to admit – a tiny part of me was hoping to see you with Cinnabons strapped to your head…
February 11, 2010 at 9:51 am
There are no words for how much I love you right now Helen. How the hell do you come up with this stuff? I think if that were really a movie it would definitely break box-office records. Any chance the Darth Vader/bad guy is played by Sarah Palin? It just seems fitting.
Oh and #19, I’m trying to press your thumbs up button, but its not working.
February 11, 2010 at 9:54 am
The RED BUTTON was used up on WW 3-WW 10 so it went brass I guess. Silly Canadian hosers – EH?
February 11, 2010 at 9:54 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
February 11, 2010 at 10:00 am
Credit must go to Bronc, who took my idea and ran with it. I only wanted a Photoshop. He went full-retard.
February 11, 2010 at 10:01 am
Cute. However, as a Canadian I feel I must point of that it’s Yukon Territory, and the Northwest Territories. Not Yukon Territories.
February 11, 2010 at 10:02 am
FAIL. This video needs to be in both English and French. Please redo and re-submit or a fine will be assessed. Thank you. Merci beaucop.
February 11, 2010 at 10:03 am
Damn typos! I failed myself! (Merci beaucoup…)
February 11, 2010 at 10:10 am
#2 PantsMonkey….. my sentiment exactly.
February 11, 2010 at 10:11 am
captaincavegirl, that should be “Mercy beaucouv”
Helen or Bronc: What software did you use for that????
February 11, 2010 at 10:12 am
I have never been prouder to be a Canadian…and @#24 – who gives a flying f*ck, they spelled “Saskatchewan” right!!
February 11, 2010 at 10:12 am
“That is the funniest thing I have seen in a long time. I just love the idea that WW11 is a Canada-only thing. World? Nah, just Canada.”
Canada conquered the world in World War X, after the collapse of the New New Zealand Empire, brought about by having to pay massive War Reparations to the Federal Republic of Antartica, who seized power in World War VIII. Even a loan from the Pan Austrian-Australian Co-Prosperity Sphere couldn’t bail them out.
February 11, 2010 at 10:12 am
#20 LilPrincess…..sweet jeebus, lets hope Palin doesn’t live long enough to see WW 11!! She can’t be immortal…can she? please say no.
February 11, 2010 at 10:18 am
Ok thank god I have an iPod touch now because I couldn’t comment or view comments without it. That movie was spectacular!! The opening sequence was awesome sauce. Kudos to bronc for taking this to level 20!!
February 11, 2010 at 10:19 am
I had a nerd-gasm watching the video. Brilliant!
As for the button, be it from the future or past, there’s one way for sure to find it if its brass… try using a little bit of brass polish on it. Just sayin’…
February 11, 2010 at 10:21 am
I’d be pissed if I weren’t so jealous. How does he do it?
February 11, 2010 at 10:29 am
I love it (the film I mean). I just wish I was as witty as the rest of you! Helen, will you leave me your brain when you die?
February 11, 2010 at 10:32 am
@#34 EXACTLY. As someone who has lived in Saskatchewan for all of her life (minus four months spent in Winnipeg), I am proud, nay, ecstatic, that it was spelled right!
In fact, I had so expected it to be spelled wrong that I had double checked to make sure my eyes were not deceiving me the first time around as I was laughing too hard.
There is only one question that remains: who would win – the Saskatchewan pirates or the Saskatchewan spies?
February 11, 2010 at 10:33 am
No worries, fellow Canadians, after all we do get the last laugh…
Free Health Care Anyone?
Bwa ha ha ha ha ha!
Now if only the dentist were free to….
February 11, 2010 at 10:34 am
Mwhaaahaaaaa
I’ll definitely go to the movies to watch that film.
Canadian Rules Football, is that a degenerate cousin of Aussie Rules?
February 11, 2010 at 10:34 am
@ #26 captaincavegirl: I really like merci beaucop better. It makes me think of a full-on renegade mercenary from the Yukon TerritorY (<<<) who drinks beer that's better than Moosehead and fucks all kinds of Canadian shit up in what will be known as the Great Fuckery War: WW11.
February 11, 2010 at 10:35 am
What a hoot. All that’s missing is reference to donuts and back bacon…
February 11, 2010 at 10:37 am
and as a P.S to all ‘yall Americans… I have never heard anyone here say “hoser”, seen a team of dogs pulling a sled, seen a real beaver, or snow in August…
I was so dissapointed when my cousin from the U.S asked if it was cold here, in July, and if our cops all ride horses… So sad so sad…
February 11, 2010 at 10:39 am
#41 – in South Carolina i was once asked if we “have microwaves up there” *sigh*
February 11, 2010 at 10:39 am
@#41 – It’s “ya’ll.” Now get back on your horse and take care of those snowy beavers.
February 11, 2010 at 10:42 am
“…the evil bloc Québécois”
classic fuckery!
February 11, 2010 at 10:43 am
#41 WrathOfFoamy: But you all play hockey, drink beer and live on unpaved roads, eh?
February 11, 2010 at 10:45 am
#41 and #42 – Here in Maine (some people think it’s part of Canada), I’ve been asked if we have electricity.
February 11, 2010 at 10:46 am
OMFG…THANK YOU FOR THIS!
I’m on day two of no smoking (after 35 years of the nasties) and I laughed so much at this that I think I got over a major ‘gotta have one’ hurdle.
February 11, 2010 at 10:46 am
Someone bought the WW11 artifact. Such a steal for an item from the future.
February 11, 2010 at 10:50 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
February 11, 2010 at 10:51 am
#48 – Suda!! I admit…I bought it. EEEK!! Mock away, I just couldn’t resist the pull of a real piece of whimsicle futuristic historical fuckery.
God Bless Canada…now pass the Moosehead.
February 11, 2010 at 10:59 am
That video was epic.
February 11, 2010 at 11:05 am
Kimmer that was a great bargain! And now you have a movie opening sequence that goes with it! Lol
February 11, 2010 at 11:09 am
Uh-Oh Canada!
Sorta a shame that by WW11 the Québécois will not master English (or French)
February 11, 2010 at 11:17 am
Why Helen! Are you Canadian? It seems only a Canadian could have written such a gloriously hilarious wall of text.
February 11, 2010 at 11:21 am
Oh my god.
(I got an account just so I could add my awe over the awesomeness of this post).
February 11, 2010 at 11:25 am
Thanks Raz!!
February 11, 2010 at 11:27 am
Regretsy Roadshow…I can hear PBS calling now. They’ll be coming from miles around to have Helen appraise their craptastic items.
February 11, 2010 at 11:30 am
My mother actually owned one of these. http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=39166275
February 11, 2010 at 11:33 am
*jaw dropped… rendered speechless…beginning to bow*
February 11, 2010 at 11:37 am
Kimmer-G: Congrats on snagging such a craptastic piece!
February 11, 2010 at 11:58 am
#43 efit so sorry, but y’all is spelled “y’all”. The apostrophy is in the place of “ou”. While I’m at it, being the punctuation police, hear this: nothing is pluralized with apostrophe s. NOTHING. (this is not aimed at you, efit). That is all.
February 11, 2010 at 11:59 am
How embarrassing. I misspelled “apostrophe” the first time. Go ahead, laugh and point.
February 11, 2010 at 12:02 pm
#24 YEAH RETARDS !!!
February 11, 2010 at 12:03 pm
#57 SloGin – My daughter owns one of those – she got it from my mother (Ours is full of precious vintage beach pebbles)
February 11, 2010 at 12:23 pm
What were those things in star wars called that collected and sold trash?
February 11, 2010 at 12:26 pm
Jawa?
February 11, 2010 at 12:30 pm
#18 I wish we could retweet comments here.
February 11, 2010 at 12:33 pm
#57 OMG! I have one of those! (…should I be admitting that? LOL)
February 11, 2010 at 12:35 pm
@mtopia
great Photoshop idea! 
A big Jawa crawler, but on sno-traks…lumbering across the Yukon, full of old Canadian relics.
February 11, 2010 at 12:38 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
February 11, 2010 at 12:38 pm
Beauty.
February 11, 2010 at 12:40 pm
Oh my god, that was classic. If this gets overlooked by the Academy, there should be an uprising.
But now the question arises, in 20 years when technology catches up with her vision will Helen release a remake with CGI 3D animation?
February 11, 2010 at 12:44 pm
re: the listing posted in #19- from the text of that “Germen Luger Holster”: “The gun is now legally with my step son” (explaining why the gun isn’t being sold with the holster, I guess?)….
This statement left me with many questions: Why the need to point out the gun’s “legal” status? Did the step son win it from the family in a lawsuit, perhaps? Is she (the seller) NOT legally allowed to own a gun, for reasons I can only imagine?
February 11, 2010 at 12:46 pm
STFU.
you’ve massively outdone yourself with this one, winchell.
February 11, 2010 at 12:52 pm
I LOVE THIS!
Thank you for making fun of Canada, we appreciate it! (seriously)….hehehehe
February 11, 2010 at 1:05 pm
Holy shit, that video was just dripping with awesomesauce!
Also, I am dumbfounded that there is a time traveler on Etsy! How cool is that?!
February 11, 2010 at 1:24 pm
You know, I’ve been arguing for years that The Red Green Show and Doctor Who are really the same program. (Odd costumes, vehicles that can hold more shit on the inside than it appears on the outside, and a complete disregard for continuity if there’s an opportunity for a sight gag.) If this button was from World War 11, then we have an explanation. “Remember, if the Sontarans don’t find you handsome, they should at least find you handy.”
February 11, 2010 at 2:08 pm
Coming soon, to a theater near you!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/47435102@N04/4349914872/sizes/o/
February 11, 2010 at 2:38 pm
I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t follow politics like I should, but I just can’t believe I didn’t notice World Wars 3-10.
And that clip. That was hysterical.
February 11, 2010 at 3:42 pm
I just shot Coke through my nose and piddled my pants simultaneously.
February 11, 2010 at 3:59 pm
LOL! It’s like you filled in a mad-lib with the only Canadian things you knew!
…and to you ‘mercan Regretsians, you have NOOO idea how much of a kick we get out of the US media and entertainment business making fun of us. We make fun of you for making fun of us because you think you’re making fun of us, and we’re actually flattered!
February 11, 2010 at 4:29 pm
….oh, on a side note, they shoot a TON of blockbuster films around my office because the funding and tax credits that our government gives are astounding. You should apply to the National Film Board of Canada for a grant to put this into production!
February 11, 2010 at 4:33 pm
#70 This is the best that I could do:
http://img64.imageshack.us/img64/8550/newhoser.jpg
February 11, 2010 at 4:34 pm
Nice job, HK/BD! Is this Level 11 Whimsical Fuckery?
February 11, 2010 at 4:43 pm
de mounty came from de future to save you.
come with me if you want to laugh.
i’ll be back. bacon.
February 11, 2010 at 5:14 pm
Apparently North Carolina is going to be involved too – this book explains their role in WW 11:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=32956012
February 11, 2010 at 5:22 pm
“LOL! It’s like you filled in a mad-lib with the only Canadian things you knew!”
Exactly what I was thinking….this is so hilarious!
February 11, 2010 at 5:42 pm
This is really the best thing ever on this site. And I’ve said that at least 10 times now.
February 11, 2010 at 5:46 pm
@#70 If I had photoshop and the skills that go with it, I would be all over that one! Clearly it begs to exist!
February 11, 2010 at 6:36 pm
Wow, that was a full-frontal nerdity flick if I ever saw one….and I loved every whimsicle second of it.
February 11, 2010 at 7:05 pm
That was grand. I had the whole family around the computer to view it.
February 11, 2010 at 7:31 pm
Here’s how fucking dumb I am.
I look at the button, and think “Ok the price seems fair and Canada did fight in WW2 why in the fuck did this make it on here?”
Then I saw the 11.
I’m not the brightest star in the sky.
February 11, 2010 at 7:34 pm
Awesomesauce! That is all!
February 11, 2010 at 7:38 pm
It’s a good thing I was wearing my corset extra tight, or I fear my sides would have split…
BRA-VO!
February 11, 2010 at 9:50 pm
#25 Ivriniel :
By WW11, it may BE Yukon Territories!
February 11, 2010 at 9:52 pm
#74 WhimsyMistress :
Because most handguns are illegal in Canada
February 11, 2010 at 10:07 pm
ahhhhh
That was a sigh of pure, unadulterated contentment.
Brava
February 11, 2010 at 11:46 pm
Do you have a whole bunch of worker droids helping you with this stuff, Helen?
February 12, 2010 at 12:03 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
February 12, 2010 at 3:25 am
Have you ever laughed so hard that you can’t breathe, and you just let out a high-pitched “squee” sound? Yeah. I was almost just suffocated by laughter, but it was worth it.
February 12, 2010 at 5:01 am
Was daydreaming as to what might compel Canada to participate in the upcoming World War 11…..the U.S. forced them to use ketchup instead of gravy on their fries?
February 12, 2010 at 8:09 am
Hahah this is basically Madlibs – the Canadian version! Props for bringing the Quebecqois and the Commonwealth into it.. this Canadian loves you!
February 12, 2010 at 10:32 am
i knew they wouldn’t manage to remain a neutral country forever. i just KNEW it. how many prequels will there be, by the way?
February 12, 2010 at 2:33 pm
@#102 HelenaHandbasket: It’s not just gravy – first we put cheese on our fries, then pour gravy on top to melt the cheese into a gooey mess of artery clogging goodness!
February 12, 2010 at 3:23 pm
yum poooooooutine
February 13, 2010 at 4:53 pm
50: Notwithstanding clause: I do not think it means what you think it means.
February 15, 2010 at 9:42 pm
#50 Pauvre nouille, on est pas ici pour faire de la politique.
Wow, that was so funny. Merci Hélène.
February 21, 2010 at 1:04 pm
“It’s a beauty way to go”
March 14, 2010 at 4:09 pm
HK: I, too, am impressed with your knowledge and accuracy of detail on this li’l ol’ country of ours! Do you indeed have some connection here?
This is the best laugh I have had in a long time… too bad I missed it the first time ’round.