New Alchemy Project!
Thanks to your Zazzle purchases last night, we have funded our next charity project!
I’m looking for someone to make Knitted Knockers!
Knitted Knockers are soft, comfortable knit prosthetic breasts for mastectomy patients. When placed in a bra, they take the shape of a real breast, and are a great alternative for many women.
One silicone prosthetic breast costs between $300 and $500. Without health insurance, they are out of the reach of most breast cancer survivors. Even those with insurance are limited to a new prosthetic breast every two years.
While I’d love to get a good amount of these for the money we’ve raised, it’s important that you make some money for your efforts. These projects are only really satisfying for me if everyone gets value from them. And I’m looking for someone with a sense of humor, because I’d love to make some with tattoos and piercings!
Here’s our alchemy request on Etsy. If you knit and think you’d like to do this, please bid for the job using this link (please don’t send me an email about this, because I may not see it).
Thanks!
February 6, 2010 at 1:21 pm
Awesome!!
February 6, 2010 at 1:22 pm
Hello, Titties!!!
Those are pretty freakin’ adorable…and whatta great cause!
Wish I knew how to knit!
February 6, 2010 at 1:39 pm
So does anyone know where to get the pattern for making these things? I checked the blog and the knitted link they had was 404d.
February 6, 2010 at 1:44 pm
Here’s the pattern
http://knitty.com/ISSUEfall05/PATTbits.html
February 6, 2010 at 1:45 pm
Thanks! I’ve been trying to figure out some community service to do and this looks like just the thing.
February 6, 2010 at 1:46 pm
I wish I were a better knitter.
February 6, 2010 at 1:54 pm
hello titties. awesome blossom.
February 6, 2010 at 2:01 pm
HK, I sent you an email regarding alchemy stuff not related to the titties…just wanted to make sure you check it. Thanks
February 6, 2010 at 2:19 pm
I did not know they had such a thing!
I’ve got an aunt who needs these. Well, I don’t know if she “needs” them, but she’s had a double mastectomy (she got a double because they gave her the option or she asked, but she only needed one). I’m going to forward her the link to the pattern and see if she’s up for doing this.
February 6, 2010 at 2:24 pm
Helen, I clicked on your link even though I am not a knitter and her story was very moving! What a great cause! I really wish I knew how to knit!
February 6, 2010 at 2:26 pm
Wow!!! What a great idea… Thanks Helen!!!
February 6, 2010 at 3:01 pm
One of my dear heart friends had breast Cancer. We all went on a weekend retreat together and all 12 of us braided one small braid using pink ribbon and a pink rubber band. We then each cut the braid we made to keep. After all of us had our braid we cried, hugged, prayed and begged God to keep her with us. Then we shaved her head.
What a great project you picked as we almost all know someone who has had Breast Cancer.
February 6, 2010 at 3:03 pm
What a great cause! I am so glad to see this project and how nice that you hire etsy artists!
February 6, 2010 at 3:06 pm
I’ve been following Regretsy since the begining but I’m not much for posting… I don’t have much witty to say. But I had to step out of lurkerdom so I could ask if anyone knows where I can get some of these for my aunt. I can’t knit and don’t know anyone who can. The site didn’t say where you could get them just how to help. If anyone can help me please do!
February 6, 2010 at 3:16 pm
You finally did it. You made me well up. Someone hand me a tissue, and not from Mitten’s box.
February 6, 2010 at 3:33 pm
#14: Ask at the oncology department at your hospital, they might know. If they can’t help you, find your local yarn store (not Wal-Mart, a small boutique) and call them and explain the situation. They probably have a knitting group that meets there and somebody would probably make you one either for the cost of materials or maybe for free.
February 6, 2010 at 3:38 pm
@ #14, write to them and ask for one!
info@theknittingexperience.com
February 6, 2010 at 3:45 pm
you guys are the best – crying in my gin
February 6, 2010 at 4:04 pm
What a terrific cause! I wish I knew how to knit. I love the regretsy fund. It shows we have hearts under the snark. My friends and I are making some hats for the hatbox foundation, and i’m working on an epic clusterfuck of whimsicalness to help raise funds for the alchemy fund.
February 6, 2010 at 4:49 pm
That’s so awesome!!! I’ve only been knitting for about a month, but my main reason to learn to use double-pointed needles is so I can make and donate these.
Hope you find an AWESOME knitter! These ladies deserve the best.
February 6, 2010 at 5:00 pm
This is a fantastic idea! I didn’t know that this product/organization even existed, but it’s so clever and helpful!
February 6, 2010 at 5:01 pm
Oh, and here’s what I can contribute to the cause since I don’t know how to knit:
February 6, 2010 at 5:08 pm
SloGin: Go to the website to find conact info http://theknittingexperience.com/knitted_knockers_program/
I’ve made at least 50 of these and it’s an amazing program. My friend has a few and likes them much more than silicone.
February 6, 2010 at 5:14 pm
LOL!! Hello Knitty! i’m dyin over here!
February 6, 2010 at 5:21 pm
This is awesome, a wonderful charity….perhaps you could bump up the amount to donate since the cash is flowin’ in?
February 6, 2010 at 5:46 pm
@21-Fired,
LMFAO
Thank You!!!!!!!
February 6, 2010 at 5:50 pm
No problem! I do what I can…
( :
February 6, 2010 at 6:11 pm
#14: I’d be more than happy to knit a titty or two for your auntie, SloGin. Go to my online shop (www.acmefibres.com) and use the Contact Us link to send me a message, give me an idea of what size you’d like.
I only wish I could do the alchemy request.
February 6, 2010 at 6:19 pm
another great cause, HK you rock!
February 6, 2010 at 8:12 pm
What perfect timing – I am mid-way through my chemo for breast cancer! Luckily it was caught early, and I only needed a lumpectomy.
While I am an avid knitter, I have too many other projects on my waiting list to devote the time to this request. But I will keep the pattern on file for the next chance I get to do some charity knitting.
February 6, 2010 at 8:35 pm
Oh Suda…you knew I would pop in here to pass you a Mittens tissue!…awesome HK!!
February 6, 2010 at 8:35 pm
Thanks for spreading the word about Knitted Knockers!! As you noted, we collect and distribute knockers free of charge to mastectomy patients. Survivors can contact us at info@theknittingexperience.com. We also love getting people to talk about the knockers. The more we discuss breast health, the more empowered women will be to advocate for themselves. I was diagnosed with BC at 28, while pregnant with our second son. A friend made me a knocker – one of the best gifts I ever received.
February 6, 2010 at 8:53 pm
#15 sudabaki© : me too- Helen you took me back to the night all of us did that with our friend. It was after her first treatment- I will never forget that night. Now I am sitting here blubbering again. I’m gonna need the mitten to soak my face up with.
February 6, 2010 at 9:19 pm
#18 CleverCat, does your mom know you’re wearing her skants and drinking gin? Sounds like an Afterschool Special.
#22 firedandfree: that was awesome. Wonder how much mileage we’ll get out of Hello Titty.
Kimmer-G: RCB and I were waiting for you to pass the tissue. Thanks.
To go back to the fairy topic for moment, I saw this posted on Facebook. Fairy fanatics are taking over.
http://www.tessafarmer.com/imagesrat.html
All you titty knitters are so awesome!
February 7, 2010 at 12:05 am
to all the mitten tissue people-
thanks again hk for bringing these projects and causes to the forefront. and a big thank you to knitexperience for visiting us over here and sharing her story with us!
this is such a neat project!
February 7, 2010 at 1:42 am
What a neat idea. I’ve never even heard of knitted prosthetic boobies before. I wish I was a better knitter. Sadly I can only knit squares.
February 7, 2010 at 5:22 am
How cute would a Regretsy T-Shirt with a big pink ribbon on it that says, “I AM A TITTY KNITTER” be. Or a bumper sticker.
February 7, 2010 at 6:10 am
#33 Crack baby use a tissue – you never know where that mitten has been!
#18 Suda I’m in real trouble if my dad finds out I’ve been wearing his “tighty-whities as a hat!
#37 As I can’t knit maybe a tee that says “I support knitted knockers” or something more clever…
and on a final note in answer to a questioned posed the other day – can’t answer for any one else but over here the mittens match the bow!
February 7, 2010 at 9:43 am
I would be happy to make some of these for you. I am a brand new knitter, though and do not understand the pattern. Anyone know where the crochet pattern is? I’ve done crochet for years and am more experienced in reading those patterns.
February 7, 2010 at 10:41 am
HK, as always, I’m amazed and impressed by your kindness, generosity, empathy, and git’r'done attitude. God bless you.
February 7, 2010 at 10:53 am
Thanks to everyone that replied for me I really appreciate it. My aunt has had a complete mastectomy after having breast cancer 3 times. Her first diagnosis was at 28. This is one of the best causes i’ve seen in awhile. I only wish I could knit and help out more.
February 7, 2010 at 11:22 am
Hello Knitty
What a thoughtful use of crafting!
February 7, 2010 at 12:04 pm
I can’t knit to save my life, and don’t have any knitter friends with shoppes on Etsy, but I’ve passed the page and info along to my Mum and a couple of other knitters in my life to hopefully get groups started in my area.
There are two world renown medical facilities in my city, so hopefully they can point us in the right direction to have these distributed to people that need them.
February 7, 2010 at 12:30 pm
I really wish I knew how to knit
I love the fact that theres such a variety in the handmade charity things you support 
I cant wait to find one I can help do 
February 7, 2010 at 1:44 pm
Don’t mean to make light of cancer victims suffering but can these be purchased somewhere? I know a gaggle (I’m assuming that’s the correct collective term) of drag queens who would scratch each other’s eyes out for these. Possibly the profits could go to a breast cancer charity??!!
February 7, 2010 at 1:49 pm
45, I like that idea! Drag queens scratching each other’s eyes out for charity!
February 7, 2010 at 1:54 pm
You know, I’ve been impressed by all the charities you’ve found for this thing, but this one seems especially sweet, somehow.
February 7, 2010 at 2:07 pm
Sorry I can’t knit.
But I am a photographer, so I can make some promotional things perhaps.
I’m a dude but I consider myself a boob man.
February 7, 2010 at 2:22 pm
Stinkbait are there men that aren’t – news to me.
February 7, 2010 at 2:23 pm
Whimsicko, I don’t know anything but I love the idea of drag queens buying knitted boobs to support breast cancer. I don’t know any drag queens or I’d make that my personal mission to start that charity.
February 7, 2010 at 2:26 pm
sudabaki© and Whimsicko maybe they want some of those crocheted you-know-wahoos too to complete the look?
February 7, 2010 at 2:30 pm
So how exactly do you change your avatar? I got a gravatar, now what?
February 7, 2010 at 2:42 pm
…Never mind.
February 7, 2010 at 2:50 pm
#51 I love your user name. It took me a minute to figure it out.
February 7, 2010 at 3:04 pm
# 39 Lissa– Here is a crochet pattern I found for them: http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/82/topic/699269
February 7, 2010 at 3:04 pm
Even this post manages to make me laugh a little…appropriately I hope! I sure wouldn’t want to give the impression I’m mocking mastectomy patients
Good grief that FB exchange was hilarious!
http://www.regretsy.com/images/huh.jpg
February 7, 2010 at 3:28 pm
IScream, I saw that on Twitter but I’m tweet challenged and didn’t quite understand what was going on, who was talking to who. I’m glad you posted this so I could understand. You could list your translation services on Etsy.
February 7, 2010 at 3:31 pm
Wish I knew how to knit. This is such a great thing. My daughter is a breast cancer survivor, we walk and donate money to find a cure but this is actually helping someone in a “hand to heart” way.
“Helen” you totally ROCK!
February 7, 2010 at 3:38 pm
And, this is my favourite charity yet that Regretsy has involved itself with.
February 7, 2010 at 3:51 pm
Slugjelly, thank you so much. This is definitely something I can do! Appreciate you going to the trouble to find it.
February 7, 2010 at 3:52 pm
Helen, I can only make a few of these… is there a way I can get them to you without going the Etsy route? I do not want to sell anything… just am willing to donate a few. I say a few because I’m a slow ass crafter.
February 7, 2010 at 4:08 pm
Attention Zazzle peeps: Argh! If you ordered a set of Coochie notecards yesterday, please speak up. (Helen Killer, I think this may have been you?) Those were made with the old Coochie design (the one that looks like it’s missing an “o”). I thought I’d taken all of those products out of the store, but apparently I didn’t. Please holler, so I can upload the fixed design and send you some complimentary replacements.
Also: Most Awesome. Charity. Evar!
February 7, 2010 at 4:39 pm
Pants, how did you know it was me??
February 7, 2010 at 5:23 pm
#62 pantsmonkey…..you sell…coochie notecards??? WHY IS YOUR SHOP NOT LINKED IN YOUR NAME I MUST SEE THESE.
..ahem…ah…please?
February 7, 2010 at 5:29 pm
Helen: It tells you the first name of the person who ordered. Shoot me your shipping address and I’ll send you a comped set with the corrected design.
February 7, 2010 at 5:32 pm
Eruanna: It’s a Zazzle thing. They’re not there now, though, because I have to go upload the corrected design, and that’s not happening until after the Super Bowl is over. You can see the design on Spoonflower, though:
http://www.spoonflower.com/fabric/142375
February 7, 2010 at 6:55 pm
I wish I thought the FB exchange was hilarious, but really I just think it’s appalling. danielle172 needs to be clocked with the big fucking clue hammer. There was nothing remotely confusing about Helen’s post, and to assume that this site would joke about cancer, and not take the time to read about the good deeds that are actually being done, it just reflects poorly on danielle172.
Not reading Regretsy anymore? Good riddance to bad rubbish. Yeah, it’s something my grandmother would say…
February 7, 2010 at 6:56 pm
(continued) but I have the utmost respect for my grandmother, and absolutely none for that dumbass.
February 7, 2010 at 8:32 pm
#56 IscreamUscream- Thanks for the entertainment as the charity Helen picked had me bawling like a baby.
What a gift- Women knitting for Women. When I worked for the county I lived in I would see patient’s at their homes. One dear heart had lost both of her breasts to Cancer. She could not afford reconstruction or the expensive falsies. The poor dear stuffed her bra with tissue to make herself look normal. Having something like your breasts taken from you by a disease really effects your self
February 7, 2010 at 8:40 pm
#60 Lissa– You’re welcome
Maybe all of us Regretsy knitters and crocheters who don’t get chosen for the Alchemy project should donate some, too. We could do a knit-along type thing.
February 7, 2010 at 8:44 pm
#59 cont. esteem and your healing time.How amazing their is an alternative today that is affordable and nuturing as the reciever will know why the knitter did what they did. What an amazing position you are in Helen. Could you not do for others? YES, do you- yes. You leave everywhere you have been with a joke or care and concern for other’s. I feel sorry that the only contribution Danielle had was making assumptions. Maybe when she needed something knitted nobody cared enough to do it for her.
February 7, 2010 at 8:45 pm
#71 I of meant # 69 cont.
February 7, 2010 at 9:24 pm
Lissa and Pantsmonkey – I’ve added a snail mail address up there under “CONTACT”, so feel free to send prosthetic tits and greeting cards.
February 7, 2010 at 9:33 pm
“Feel free to send prosthetic tits and greeting cards.” That should be my new e-mail sig. OK, cards on their way shortly.
February 8, 2010 at 2:20 am
OK, all the Zazzle designer stuff (Dingleberry Plaid, Coochie, and Louis Vagoo) is uploaded and fixed and whatnot. Helen, you’re replacement cards have been ordered and should be on their way to you soon, so all should be well with the world once again. Must. Sleep. Now.
February 8, 2010 at 2:21 am
Christ. “You’re” = “your”. I’m such a fucking tool at 5:00 in the morning.
February 8, 2010 at 4:20 pm
@45-Whimsicko
Here is a site where you can buy them!
http://www.titbits.ca/v1/tb_shop.html
February 8, 2010 at 8:21 pm
This is for such a great cause. Friend diagnosed 2 weeks ago and goes into surgery next week for a double mastectomy.
I totally suck at knitting so am no help in that regards, but will spread the word.
February 8, 2010 at 10:01 pm
I can knit, so I am going to give these an amateurish shot! Perhaps I’ll even suggest it to my Commuknits group…
February 9, 2010 at 1:58 am
Not an original post, but I wish I could knit. And thank you, Regretsy, for confirming that “snark” and “heart” are not mutually exclusive.
February 9, 2010 at 8:59 pm
Lunifera. Thanks for the link, I shall pass it on!