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Red, White and Blew

Posted by Helen Killer

129 comments

I don’t want this to come off like some nationalistic rant, but I just thank God I was born right here in the good old US of A, where people can shred priceless 100 year old handmade quilts and make shitty dresses out of them.

AMERICA, FUCK YEAH

Filed in Clothing 129 comments

129 Comments

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Jan 27, 2010
1:32 pm

#1 angie :

i’m sure Maw-MAw is turning over in her grave about this!

Rate this comment: +26

Jan 27, 2010
1:35 pm

#2 SuperSnark :

TRAIN WRECK!!!

My 7 year old can “create” better stuff from my scrap box and NOT f*ck up a 100 year old quilt. I agreee Maw Naws everyhwere are grave spinning!

Rate this comment: +21

Jan 27, 2010
1:37 pm

#3 SuperSnark :

OOPS i mean Maw Maws, sorry i’m a crappy typer!

Rate this comment: +7

Jan 27, 2010
1:38 pm

#4 leftfoot :

You know what’s realy sad? If she had kept it as a quilt, antique ones can easily go for more than that, depending on fabric and intricacy.

Rate this comment: +52

Jan 27, 2010
1:38 pm

#5 verysage :

Oh look! Jenna Bush is selling her wedding dress!

Rate this comment: +35

Jan 27, 2010
1:38 pm

#6 underemployed :

That’s sad. It looks like a shark and an antique quilt got trapped in a net together for a while, then somebody found the whole thing and put it on.

Rate this comment: +60

Jan 27, 2010
1:40 pm

#7 Dynomoose :

I’m so sick of these “I’ll just sloppily sew some random shit together and charge a mint for it” people.

Rate this comment: +71

Jan 27, 2010
1:41 pm

#8 denisewalks :

How sad and fucked up to make a crappy dress out of a beautiful quilt somebody’s relatives took hours to make.

Rate this comment: +76

Jan 27, 2010
1:42 pm

#9 underemployed :

I want a brooch called “Pussy in the Woods,” but only if it actually says “Pussy in the Woods” on it. Close, but no cigar: http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=34657309

Too bad too because that is EXACTLY my “Pussy in the Woods” budget.

Rate this comment: +14

Jan 27, 2010
1:44 pm

#10 beanybean :

Lord have mercy!

Rate this comment: +6

Jan 27, 2010
1:46 pm

#11 Dynomoose :

Her “NO WAR” hat is counterproductive. Every time I look at it, I want to declare war on her sewing machine. http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=18304823

Rate this comment: +36

Jan 27, 2010
1:47 pm

#12 clevercat :

OMFG!!!! and just when I thunk granny were gonna give it on down ta me when she up and died and she done taked the drapes and the lacey curtins I were hankerin fer too.

Rate this comment: +17

Jan 27, 2010
1:49 pm

#13 rockin3 :

It actually kinda makes me angry — think about how long it took someone to originally make that quilt!

Rate this comment: +40

Jan 27, 2010
1:50 pm

#14 fluffysue :

Oh my. I’ll bet the original quilt was lovely. This, not so much.
I definitely need to dig up the old hand-me-down sewing machine I’m pretty sure I have somewhere (never used by me), and learn how to use it well enough to sew crap together. (Oh…not literally “crap”…somehow I do feel the need to emphasize that here…)

Rate this comment: +28

Jan 27, 2010
1:50 pm

#15 jennnnn :

That poor, poor quilt

Rate this comment: +23

Jan 27, 2010
1:51 pm

#16 HelenaHandbasket :

Sometimes my clothes dryer makes garments like this for me if I load it too heavily with sheets.

Rate this comment: +85

Jan 27, 2010
1:52 pm

#17 Patty has been abuducted by an alien :

My dear Gramma Ruth would claw her way out of her grave and attack me as a zombie if I dared to do this to the quilt she made me when I got married 23 years ago.

I couldn’t even fathom doing this to a 100 year old quilt (well, ANY quilt, for that matter, because this is just ugly).

Rate this comment: +43

Jan 27, 2010
1:52 pm

#18 flare :

My heart is broken over the untimely death of the priceless heirloom quilt.

A moment of silence….

Rate this comment: +54

Jan 27, 2010
1:53 pm

#19 meanbeads :

Millions of quilters cried out in terror, and were suddenly silenced. *bows head*

Rate this comment: +60

Jan 27, 2010
1:55 pm

#20 NinjaGato :

The woman who made the quilt (and intended it to be a cat bed) is rolling in her grave

Rate this comment: +18

Jan 27, 2010
1:55 pm

#21 Dynomoose :

Perhaps the people of Regretsy should have a memorial service for this beautiful heirloom quilt.

Rate this comment: +36

Jan 27, 2010
1:56 pm

#22 NinjaGato :

whats the point of those lace wings on the side?

Rate this comment: +12

Jan 27, 2010
2:00 pm

#23 bootsychoo :

The ability to crochet should only be used for good, not evil.

Rate this comment: +47

Jan 27, 2010
2:01 pm

#24 kittyofassisi :

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=23642581

It looks like someone has been cleansing again

Rate this comment: +18

Jan 27, 2010
2:01 pm

#25 tarabu :

Granny would kick my ass twice if I did this.

Also, how f^cking dumb are her customers that she has to explain that a rooster is a typical farm animal?

*smacks own forehead*

Oh, right, dumb enough to pay $400 for all the hours she spent creating this travesty.

Excuse me while I go produce something that is merely technically proficient and visually pleasing.

Rate this comment: +40

Jan 27, 2010
2:02 pm

#26 kittyofassisi :

#9 Dynomoose,

Hey! It’s the thought that counts!

Rate this comment: +3

Jan 27, 2010
2:04 pm

#27 kleverkloggs :

I’m just left wondering on what occasions these wierd and wonderful outfits are appropriate, for this, the young mothers quilting open day?

Rate this comment: +8

Jan 27, 2010
2:09 pm

#28 miss_naughty :

so what does destroying what was most likely a gorgeous heirloom quilt have to do with the plastic rooster disk that she got in bulk from Oriental Trading Company when they were having a chinese new years clearance sale?

Rate this comment: +32

Jan 27, 2010
2:09 pm

#29 IscreamUscream :

@ meanbeads–that was both funny, and sad.

Good thing she didn’t get her mits on old Navajo rugs!

Rate this comment: +11

Jan 27, 2010
2:12 pm

#30 carriecabral75 :

Ima slap a bitch if she don’t stay out of my damn linen closet!

Rate this comment: +11

Jan 27, 2010
2:13 pm

#31 voxwoman :

I am a quilter. I cried when I saw this. I can only pray that this antique quilt was falling apart badly and irreparable. She should be banned from all consignment stores.

However, the dress would go very well with this goiter-shaped neck-hanging-thing that she made:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=29119945

Rate this comment: +34

Jan 27, 2010
2:14 pm

#32 voxwoman :

Oh, and she should have called the rooster a cock, which is also proper for a male chicken.

Rate this comment: +10

Jan 27, 2010
2:15 pm

#33 miss_naughty :

It appears she is the person who bought that girl’s dreads:

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=19561648

Rate this comment: +7

Jan 27, 2010
2:16 pm

#34 blondeweezie :

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=23641449

Charlie Parker’s Delight = Fashion Nightmare.

I’ve seen 5 year old kids put together a more coherent outfit.

Rate this comment: +9

Jan 27, 2010
2:18 pm

#35 bloodorange :

A similar effect happens for me if the hooks on my bra get tangled up with a pair of tights and a sweater in the wash.

Rate this comment: +40

Jan 27, 2010
2:22 pm

#36 Ladybug :

Sing with me now…

Oh beautiful, for specious lies,
for shredded lace with stain
for mutilated majesty
of quilted counterpane…

Rate this comment: +59

Jan 27, 2010
2:28 pm

#37 NinjaGato :

nobody’s seen this one?
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=34657309

Pussy in the woods…hehe pussy. also whatever that thing in the middle is sorta looks like a vadge

Rate this comment: +7

Jan 27, 2010
2:29 pm

#38 lyontamer :

There’s a death-quilt joke in here somewhere…

Rate this comment: +4

Jan 27, 2010
2:36 pm

#39 libertyangel :

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=18251590
She’s a proud member of the Lockjaw Indian tribe.

Rate this comment: +4

Jan 27, 2010
2:36 pm

#40 jessguthrie :

at least its not as nasty as her science experiment pumpkin bracelet… http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=29119526
what the hell, maybe she found a cure for cancer…too bad she fiber glassed over it! Just what I want on my wrist!

Rate this comment: +9

Jan 27, 2010
2:38 pm

#41 Fancy Pants McGee :

You know, this “dress” might just pass as modern art depicting the current state of our nation. It certainly depicts Shitting On The Past, if nothing else. If I saw this on the wall in MOMA I would say “ahhhh yes, I see,” and then go to a Green Peace meeting or something.

Rate this comment: +32

Jan 27, 2010
2:38 pm

#42 Kiwihasdreads :

Staining something with tea does not make it better! At least all the materials “where” brought together to make this American nightmare dress….with a Japanese brooch.

Rate this comment: +12

Jan 27, 2010
2:40 pm

#43 lyontamer :

Amen #41!

Rate this comment: +4

Jan 27, 2010
2:41 pm

#44 Recovering Crack Baby :

I pray she did not cut the quilt in halk’s. One of these in America is one two many.

Rate this comment: +16

Jan 27, 2010
2:41 pm

#45 libertyangel :

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=18263486
Here’s some more hand work that she’s destroyed…

Rate this comment: +6

Jan 27, 2010
2:42 pm

#46 Recovering Crack Baby :

Would it be considered rude to tell her she looks like she just jumped out of bed

Rate this comment: +13

Jan 27, 2010
2:43 pm

#47 alliegata :

She tore…she tore up a…a HUNDRED YEAR OLD QUILT?! *twitch* Woman, have you never seen Antique Roadshow? Well, that’s okay, if you’re this dumb you don’t deserve the couple thousand bucks you just destroyed.

Rate this comment: +18

Jan 27, 2010
2:44 pm

#48 lyontamer :

(snarkless) Quilt’s history aside, I kinda like the dress. I like all the textures. Same with a couple of her other dresses.

I can see using a quilt that was severely damaged already, though it would be better to make a keepsake, not a dress. Something to conserve what’s left of the quilt rather than wear it out further. I’ve seen people who make custom keepsakes from old wedding gowns, etc.

Rate this comment: -2

Jan 27, 2010
2:46 pm

#49 whaapplewha :

I think the seller misunderstood the skants contest.
To clarify: you put a sweater or shirt on your body as a pair of pants. You do not tear apart a 100 year old quilt to make a piece of crap out of it.

Rate this comment: +29

Jan 27, 2010
2:46 pm

#50 whaapplewha :

Oh, and Stevie Nicks called. She does NOT want her dress back.

Rate this comment: +42

Jan 27, 2010
2:50 pm

#51 bloodorange :

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=18256957

“You will get plenty of looks when you wear this hat.”
Yes, you certainly will. Looks of pity as the nice men gently fit you with a straitjacket.

Rate this comment: +11

Jan 27, 2010
2:51 pm

#52 whaapplewha :

#31 voxwoman: it looks like she cut off someone’s dreds and stuck them in a sling to wear around her neck. uuuugggghly.

Rate this comment: +3

Jan 27, 2010
2:52 pm

#53 bloodorange :

“I’ve been in the field of graphic design for more than 20 years, working for well-known magazines like Rolling Stone and Condé Nast Traveler to name a few. My last official job before moving out of New York was Vice President of Creative Services World Wide for Esté Lauder.”

SAY WHAT?!

Rate this comment: +20

Jan 27, 2010
2:53 pm

#54 lyontamer :

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

Rate this comment: -13

Jan 27, 2010
2:57 pm

#55 whimsicalisthenics :

I love that she went to Parsons for Communication Design.

Rate this comment: +6

Jan 27, 2010
2:58 pm

#56 rip and snort :

Two thoughts come to mind…. first, regarding the quilt, some people have no respect anymore.

Second, regarding the “Pussy in the Woods,” a) is this a brooch you wear??? and b) why/how would it move as you walk as claimed in the description? and c) would you want it to move as you walk??? Oh, and d) is that a vagina on it? Is that the Pussy in the Woods?

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=34657309

Rate this comment: +8

Jan 27, 2010
3:00 pm

#57 blondeweezie :

$400 for this?? Really???

Rate this comment: +11

Jan 27, 2010
3:02 pm

#58 Sculptor69 :

Really, as both an artist and an antiques collector, I want to die when I look at this. Unless that quilt was an absolute wreck (and it obviously wasn’t, or she’d have had nothing to use), this is sacrilege and heresy of the highest order. I’ve got no problem giving a new life to something that would otherwise go into a landfill (I’ve killed irreparable clocks for their pieces), but this is horrid. I bet she’d chop up a Biedermeier chair because she thought she could use the upholstery…

Rate this comment: +30

Jan 27, 2010
3:04 pm

#59 Moons in Leo :

Okay, Fabric Mauling Woman, if you’d really worked for Este (sic) Lauder you should have at least learned how to spell it. Estee is spinning in her grave.

Rate this comment: +33

Jan 27, 2010
3:05 pm

#60 bumKittens :

This reminds me of what someone would wear in some sort of post-apocalyptic situation.

It’s Mad Max chic!

Rate this comment: +20

Jan 27, 2010
3:07 pm

#61 crapgawker :

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

Rate this comment: -5

Jan 27, 2010
3:10 pm

#62 sheltiepitbullfun :

Ok the size is right, the look is right for my next Halloween ghost pirate costume, but the price? Hell-ooo? I’d spend maybe $4 on this not $400.

Rate this comment: +10

Jan 27, 2010
3:13 pm

#63 voxwoman :

#37 Ninjagato, that’s a walnut, covered with some shiny shit.

Rate this comment: +10

Jan 27, 2010
3:14 pm

#64 rip and snort :

“Lotus Seeds Playing in My Garden”

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=29119945

I’ve gone back to this several times and can’t decide if this reminds me of a medieval torture of some kind or a growth a la Elephant Man. Either way, I just can’t get my mind to go to playing in a garden in any form. This looks painful.

Rate this comment: +14

Jan 27, 2010
3:14 pm

#65 cratz :

I was trying to give her the benefit of the doubt, trying to think of where it might be appropriate to wear some of these ……things. Then I realized – Mardi Gras is coming up!

Rate this comment: +6

Jan 27, 2010
3:15 pm

#66 Feel Free To Customise and Whimsiclise My Vagina :

Some people have no idea of the value of history

How on earth could she physically cut up something so old???

Some people are just the King Of Stupid

Rate this comment: +23

Jan 27, 2010
3:18 pm

#67 Texchanchan :

Looks like a tornado hit somebody’s scrap bin.
- Cutting up a quilt – enough said.
- Antique lace may or may not be valuable, depending on a lot of factors, but it’s a shame to cut it up for THIS.
- If she had sacrificed various textiles to make a beautiful, meaningful work of art, more power to her. But this!

Who buys this stuff? Who wears it? Do they stalk around in it at restaurants and bars trying to impress each other? Because it sure isn’t impressing the rest of us.

Rate this comment: +17

Jan 27, 2010
3:18 pm

#68 CoyPowers :

This is great, and totally worth $400!
…It is the actual dress that the old junkyard monster woman wore in “The Labyrinth”, right?

Rate this comment: +37

Jan 27, 2010
3:23 pm

#69 Stretch65 :

Survived a long and productive life and warmed the hearts of many a person and cat.

R I P Quilton “Patchwork” Quilterson aka The Quilt
1908-2010

Rate this comment: +22

Jan 27, 2010
3:32 pm

#70 Dawgtowner :

What the hell.It looks like she took Grandma’s heirloom, stuck it in a wood chipper, and then tried to reattach the pieces.

Rate this comment: +11

Jan 27, 2010
3:37 pm

#71 pantsmonkey :

WTF?! Who does that to a 100 year old quilt?!

Rate this comment: +20

Jan 27, 2010
3:42 pm

#72 afinch :

I’m massively delurking here. My mother gave me a quilt when I was seven years old. I don’t care if that thing ends up as scraps, I would NEVER make it something else. Ever. I just wonder why this crapseller felt she had to destroy a piece of history like that.

Rate this comment: +17

Jan 27, 2010
3:44 pm

#73 DrButcher :

Seeing things like this make me want to bury all of our old family quilts with us. I gotta love the America the Beautiful theme with japanese ivory pieces……ummm yea.

Rate this comment: +11

Jan 27, 2010
3:47 pm

#74 StinkBait :

Holy shit!!! I had a sex dream involving Helen and she WAS WEARING THAT DRESS!!!

Well she wasn’t wearing it long.

Rate this comment: +37

Jan 27, 2010
3:56 pm

#75 Recovering Crack Baby :

I think pin #11 should be a Regretsy Award. Can we pin this???

Rate this comment: +2

Jan 27, 2010
3:58 pm

#76 Recovering Crack Baby :

#69 pantsmonkey – I agree 100%. I think we should kick down her door and take all the helpless quilts that live in her home. Somebody has got to save the quilts.

Rate this comment: +10

Jan 27, 2010
4:04 pm

#77 bumKittens :

quilts=blankets

and we all know that blankets kill babies. Maybe she was just doing her part to save the babies.

Rate this comment: +30

Jan 27, 2010
4:13 pm

#78 Stretch65 :

R I P in this case means “Rest in Pieces”

Rate this comment: +10

Jan 27, 2010
4:21 pm

#79 Eruanna :

Now now…this could have a perfectly good use…

Im thinking like as a costume in a post-apocalypse movie??

Rate this comment: +2

Jan 27, 2010
4:22 pm

#80 Sculptor69 :

#71, no, I think we need Mac’s opinion. If she shits on it in derision, it might even actually improve it.

Rate this comment: +1

Jan 27, 2010
4:24 pm

#81 SuperSnark :

OMG!! I found a quilt in her favorites and it is sold! please please say it aint so, she couldn’t possibly be wanting to make another! Hopefully someone else bought it to save it from another craptacular desgin from hell!

Rate this comment: +4

Jan 27, 2010
4:26 pm

#82 spankerella :

For $400 I’d expect something that looked a little less like Dr. Frankenstein made it.

Rate this comment: +7

Jan 27, 2010
4:31 pm

#83 ashton :

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

Rate this comment: -40

Jan 27, 2010
4:35 pm

#84 mstiefan :

What kills me is, I really WANT to like this — I looked at all the pics, tilted my head, dimmed the lights, squinted my eyes, hoping to see the funky hippie 70’s look that I *think* she was going for, but the only reaction I can muster is a big fat “meh.”

Rate this comment: +13

Jan 27, 2010
4:36 pm

#85 ashton :

Go ahead and file this one under Annoying Descriptions though, christ: http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=21242413

Rate this comment: +3

Jan 27, 2010
5:12 pm

#86 Vile & Evil Debbie Downer :

I like it, except for the macrame-looking stuff. Also think it looks like post-apocalypse wear, ‘cuz bikepunk chicks need to look pretty sometimes, too.

Go ahead and put that red thumbs-down in my ass for liking it.

Rate this comment: +1

Jan 27, 2010
5:12 pm

#87 AwesomePossum :

Maybe she was inspired by this disturbing clash of textures? http://jezebel.com/5458394/valentinos-fugly-patchwork-technicolor-mess/gallery/3

Rate this comment: -2

Jan 27, 2010
5:35 pm

#88 CreepyLittleGirl :

I don’t care. I love this dress. This is my favorite thing that’s ever been on Regretsy (at least in the non-whimsicle-fuckery kind of way). I always like the stuff that’s in the worst dress list in the tabloids, too.

Rate this comment: -1

Jan 27, 2010
5:35 pm

#89 libertyangel :

@#87 at least those look like the designer knows how to use a sewing machine instead of improvising with chicken-wire and spit.

Rate this comment: +8

Jan 27, 2010
5:42 pm

#90 razberries :

“america, fuck yeah”- that team america movie was a riot.
on another note, i don’t see the point of shredding an antique item. even if it had no sentimental value to the seller, at one time it was cherished and loved. kinda like the velveteen rabbit.

Rate this comment: +15

Jan 27, 2010
5:54 pm

#91 Dynomoose :

#65 cratz : As someone who pretty much lives for Mardi Gras, I can tell you that the drunken, shit-covered homeless person who listens to the voices in her head wouldn’t be caught dead in this hideous piece of crap at a parade or anywhere!

Rate this comment: +13

Jan 27, 2010
5:55 pm

#92 janncri :

I consider myself to be fairly open minded but WTF? Who wears this shit (a goiter necklace?? pussy brooch?). And the prices just piss me off.

Rate this comment: +14

Jan 27, 2010
6:03 pm

#93 Meg88 :

I would have given that quilt a good home. I have a 90 or so year old quilt. You know where it is? In a box because I’m too scared to cover up with it for FEAR OF RUINING IT. Why can’t we all have the same fears?

Rate this comment: +15

Jan 27, 2010
6:20 pm

#94 Eruanna :

#88 aaahhhh but would you pay 400$ for it?

Rate this comment: +2

Jan 27, 2010
7:09 pm

#95 clevercat :

Razberries – I am too tired to shop it- but you made me so want to see the Velveteen Rabbit canoodling the naked girl with red mittens. LOL

Rate this comment: +6

Jan 27, 2010
7:25 pm

#96 Rowan :

There is a notice “BeatriceMcClelland is currently away
Visit the shop home for more details or to sign up to be notified when they return”

Wow, do you think someone is currently re-evaluating their crafting abilities tonight? I’m just amazed because usually they just come on here and tell us we suck. (Kind of find that amusing at times.)

Rate this comment: +8

Jan 27, 2010
7:31 pm

#97 Helen Killer :

@ #96 She’s probably at the Smithsonian, looking for fabric.

Rate this comment: +40

Jan 27, 2010
7:32 pm

#98 whimsicalisthenics :

I think we hurt her feelings. Her shop is in vacation mode.

Rate this comment: +7

Jan 27, 2010
7:33 pm

#99 cratz :

#91 Dynomoose – so you’re saying you don’t think I should wear it to the Rex ball as I was planning?

Rate this comment: +4

Jan 27, 2010
7:39 pm

#100 mags :

I kinda liked this when I first saw it. I assumed the quilt had been severely damaged and this was just the only usable part of it. I thought it was cool to give new life to an overloved quilt. Then I looked at more of the pictures. It really does just suck, a bunch of stuff apparently randomly sewn together. The pic from the back made it look like there was actually some intentional design, but nope.

Rate this comment: +9

Jan 27, 2010
7:44 pm

#101 clevercat :

#93 Meg88 ever since I joined Regretsy my fears involve large bears, visions of hoohas including my own seen through the legs of my skants and clowns. As of tonight I am afraid I’ll find a catturdpin or this dress in my dryer. What next?

Rate this comment: +10

Jan 27, 2010
8:36 pm

#102 ciaohowdy :

Its like Dolly Parton and Cher gangbanged a quilt. File under “quilt rape”

Rate this comment: +18

Jan 27, 2010
9:11 pm

#103 rip and snort :

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=31003182

This scarf is pretty. But the $40 price is baffling. Handspun material grown perenially by families in Nepal…. someone is getting shortchanged. I do like the scarf, however.

Rate this comment: +3

Jan 27, 2010
9:50 pm

#104 redredred :

It’s a shame her ancestors didn’t rise from the grave as one against her and her shop. I know mine would.

This would be like if I took my old antique wood furniture, made it into kindling, glued it together, and called it a “desk”

Rate this comment: +8

Jan 27, 2010
10:13 pm

#105 badkitty :

Now we know what Andie from “Pretty in Pink” did with her life…

Rate this comment: +14

Jan 27, 2010
10:29 pm

#106 www.bajunajewelry.etsy.com :

I’m putting on my quilted black arm band now.

Rate this comment: +4

Jan 27, 2010
10:30 pm

#107 Feel Free To Customise and Whimsiclise My Vagina :

ROFL @#98

Rate this comment: +1

Jan 27, 2010
10:35 pm

#108 Feel Free To Customise and Whimsiclise My Vagina :

Someone should buy it and turn it back into a quilt and send her a photo.

I vote we all chip in one dollar.

We could raise $400 bucks, and some person who can sew (which is not me) can sew it back up possibly adding appropriate spoonflower whimsicleness and add it to the blanket collection than is alledgedly killing babies.

Rate this comment: +12

Jan 27, 2010
10:37 pm

#109 nellie29 :

Two things:
1) Is it just me or is her left breast kind of hanging out the side thru the *crotched* part?
2) As a person from North Carolina, I feel a little defiled.

Rate this comment: +10

Jan 28, 2010
1:17 am

#110 rocza :

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=29119945

Lotusboob was not meant to be a fashion inspiration.

Rate this comment: +3

Jan 28, 2010
4:31 am

#111 Rowan :

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=18263486

But does it contain real Japanese noodles? For $250.00 throw in a pack Ramen noodles-darn it!

Rate this comment: +2

Jan 28, 2010
4:35 am

#112 Rowan :

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=18238386

Ok, the name of this piece pretty much says it all.

Rate this comment: +1

Jan 28, 2010
5:37 am

#113 turtlegirl76 :

I’m mesmerized by the photos. But not by the dress. Are we sure that’s a woman modeling the dress?

Rate this comment: +3

Jan 28, 2010
6:59 am

#114 IndyJules :

Betsy Ross; The Eary Years. Workin’ the corners to score thread and needles…maybe a few spangles if the deed was dirty enough.

Rate this comment: +3

Jan 28, 2010
7:03 am

#115 Dix :

As a quilter, history buff, and archives employee, I’ll try not to make this an incoherent rant.

Unbelievable pieces of $#!% made by somebody without a clue, to be sold to somebody else without a clue. $#@!!-ing hipsters appropriating traditions in which they have no genuine interest or respect, so they can show off how creative they are (and, hopefully, make a buck). If you think it’s interesting trivia that a rooster is a barnyard animal, you need to back the Hell away from the…

Rate this comment: +11

Jan 28, 2010
7:26 am

#116 enamy :

i love that she says this about one of her items: “Wear it back to front or front to back.”

the thing’s so jacked up, the creator doesn’t even know how to put it on. http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=18238386

most of her items look like she gave up halfway through. i’d hate to see the prices on them if she had finished.

Rate this comment: +2

Jan 28, 2010
7:34 am

#117 enamy :

@ #115 Dix: i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again… hipsters ruin EVERYTHING.

Rate this comment: +5

Jan 28, 2010
7:52 am

#118 henmen :

would this not look good on Michele Obama?

Rate this comment: +7

Jan 28, 2010
8:03 am

#119 Jack Frieze :

#117 enamy: A dangerous slippery slope here. We imply we’re hipper-than-thou by disliking hipsters, than someone claims to be hipper than Regretsyians because we are just haters, then the next person says they like us, but only ironically, and finally its hipsters all the way down and we’re all hip-deep in meta-hipsters.

Rate this comment: +5

Jan 28, 2010
9:35 am

#120 laughinglurker :

It’s kind of Betsy Ross meets Morticia Adams. Just needs a bouquet of dead-headed roses to accessorize, and wallah!

Rate this comment: +4

Jan 28, 2010
12:05 pm

#121 hoser :

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

Rate this comment: -7

Jan 28, 2010
12:08 pm

#122 hoser :

Quilts + crochet tablebloths do not equal dress attire of any kind (

Rate this comment: 0

Jan 28, 2010
2:43 pm

#123 VoteAudrey :

So this is like a couture slanket?

Rate this comment: +1

Jan 28, 2010
3:46 pm

#124 Feel Free To Customise and Whimsiclise My Vagina :

#119

Say What?

Rate this comment: -1

Jan 28, 2010
4:05 pm

#125 Dynomoose :

#99 cratz : a: I don’t think you’d make it in the door. Heck, you’d probably be booed off the street during Orpheus, in the rain. b: if you’re actually going to the Rex ball, I am insanely jealous. I watch those krewe balls on TV like some people watch baseball.

Rate this comment: 0

Jan 28, 2010
4:44 pm

#126 Alethiometrist :

Is this the companion piece to that Lady Satterly’s Lover brown satin hunk-o-shit thing?

Rate this comment: 0

Jan 29, 2010
5:06 pm

#127 grodelated :

1) yeah, i can kinda see what she was going for, and it would have been cool, but she totally missed the mark.
2) why the fuck would she use a 100-year-old quilt instead of one from walmart or something?
3) i feel the same way about most of her items – the materials are pretty cool, but she wastes them. (except the “pussy in the woods”, which apparently she made from crap she found on the ground?)
but most importantly:
4) “back to front” and “front to back” are the same thing!

Rate this comment: +1

Feb 1, 2010
2:50 am

#128 FreshFruit :

The only way I can think of this and not want to scream, is to consider that perhaps this is what was left/recoverable from a badly damaged quilt.
Otherwise, I want to scream.

Rate this comment: 0

Feb 1, 2010
2:51 am

#129 FreshFruit :

Apparently I felt the need to mention screaming twice. That’s how sad it is.

Rate this comment: 0