Good grief, and here I am kind of afraid to try knitting wire because I’ afraid it won’t look very good. If THIS crap can sell I have nothing to worry about!
Oh Helen! SPOT ON!! I had tears pouring down my face I was laughing so hard. Before I even scrolled down and saw the chore boy cleaning pads that’s EXACTLY what came to mind when I saw this tangle of wire cutting into the delicate flesh of the model.
Ha ha! If I wanted barbed wire wrapped around my neck I’d precariously roll in a hayfield.
But with all due respect, I believe she is actually molding jewelry wire. This piece is a little bit silly, but the rest of her shop is absolutely gorgeous.
Great minds think alike, before I scrolled down on this lovely piece of fleece my first thought was Chore Boy! Either that or the cat puked up Christmas tinsel.
I think what’s even worse (besides the price tag and the fact I could clean my aluminum sink with my neck when wearing it) that one that was worse got sold: http://www.etsy.com/view_transaction.php?transaction_id=15449426 It’s like barbed wire around your neck, ugh.
It’s kinda pretty actually. But it’s the price …. and the unimpressive mere 10 yards of “wire” … which has me worried. Those “flower” earrings on her site are the scary pieces
Finally, a necklace you can wear twice! This piece can take you from night to day. Wear it out to the club and soak in the stares (NO one is going to have one but you!). But that’s not the best part, because the next morning at work the office buzz will be all about you and your fascinating neck rash!
Ok, you can definitely knit with wire. I see what she’s done here. But the spun comment is what throws me. It looks like she knit up a length of wire and then fucked it up somehow and molded the fucked up mess into this, stuck it on a necklace, and called it “art”.
i think most of her stuff is beautiful, seems a bit overpriced, but at the same time, i dont have the know how long it takes to knit wire, but im sure it takes a lot of patience. Not sure if this peice is really wearable, but i have some of those not so practical pieces in my collection as well..
You know those awful wire binding machines that businesses use for white papers, brochures, et cetera? When I was gainfully employed and one of the pages was missing/wrong/etc, I had to rip ‘em open and the wire would be all stringy-weird. I’d then take about 4-5 minutes of company time to sculpt a figure out of said wire mass. I mean, waste not want not right? I worked with a SCAD grad and I am proud to say my work was almost as impressive. It was black wire, and not “gold,” alas.
I think it would look smashing against a bright white t-shirt–nothing like a little chest hair sneaking out the top to make all the guys swoon! Rrrrrrrowr!
January 21, 2010 at 6:11 pm
My first thought was large awkwardly placed birthmark.
January 21, 2010 at 6:12 pm
Finally something for armless people who have to do the dishes with their neck.
January 21, 2010 at 6:12 pm
My first thought was “she has a merkin on her neck!”
January 21, 2010 at 6:12 pm
The perfect accessory for the crack whore.
January 21, 2010 at 6:13 pm
Also the shape of the Celebration earrings here is that of a used playtex tampon..ladies you see what I mean
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=24211269
January 21, 2010 at 6:14 pm
I always wanted to look like a hairy-chested ginge! This is perfect!
January 21, 2010 at 6:14 pm
It’s a fleece alright at $350
January 21, 2010 at 6:14 pm
ginger pubes!
January 21, 2010 at 6:16 pm
ok but the rest of her shop has some exquisite, beautiful stuff…
January 21, 2010 at 6:16 pm
Maybe she had that dreadlock gold plated?
January 21, 2010 at 6:16 pm
Hey if this sells maybe I should list my Brillo Barrettes! Or my SOS scarves?
January 21, 2010 at 6:18 pm
Most knitters call this sort of thing yarn barf.
January 21, 2010 at 6:19 pm
Keep your crack making supplies on the DL.
January 21, 2010 at 6:19 pm
#6: I was thinking the along the same lines: Midas’ pubes!
January 21, 2010 at 6:20 pm
I was wondering what had happened to Donnie Most’s moustache.
January 21, 2010 at 6:23 pm
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=14918330
Did someone say “merkin”?
January 21, 2010 at 6:24 pm
Wear this with the “I Have A Dream” party mask, and pretend you just hocked up a furball!
January 21, 2010 at 6:26 pm
A Donnie Most reference is a good reason to visit Regretsy
January 21, 2010 at 6:33 pm
#11 Bronc Drywall :
I was wondering what had happened to Donnie Most’s moustache.
The REAL question is: What happened to Donnie Most?
January 21, 2010 at 6:33 pm
I do think a lot of her stuff is nice actually. Mocking is just so fun.
January 21, 2010 at 6:34 pm
Handwork aside, it looks like pubes.
January 21, 2010 at 6:36 pm
Proudly display your flagellation compulsion.
January 21, 2010 at 6:36 pm
#16 greenfuzz: I think that much of her stuff is beautiful but I really did think of pubic hair when I first saw this piece.
January 21, 2010 at 6:40 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
January 21, 2010 at 6:45 pm
This is what happens when a goiter goes untreated, people – it EXPLODES. Always use iodized salt!
January 21, 2010 at 6:45 pm
as always my partner in crime Raz and I are sympatico. I also immediately thought “ginger pubes” when I saw this.
January 21, 2010 at 6:49 pm
Add a vagina necklace for a sensational outfit that will have everyone talking!
January 21, 2010 at 6:51 pm
#6 razberries :
ginger pubes!
That was exactly what i was going to say!
Someone should get this and put a vulva necklace to wear with it.
January 21, 2010 at 7:08 pm
Good grief, and here I am kind of afraid to try knitting wire because I’ afraid it won’t look very good. If THIS crap can sell I have nothing to worry about!
January 21, 2010 at 7:12 pm
OUCH! I can’t imagine the rash that might cause.
January 21, 2010 at 7:28 pm
Oh Helen! SPOT ON!! I had tears pouring down my face I was laughing so hard. Before I even scrolled down and saw the chore boy cleaning pads that’s EXACTLY what came to mind when I saw this tangle of wire cutting into the delicate flesh of the model.
January 21, 2010 at 7:35 pm
Need to add – I looked at her other items and think they are absolutely gorgeous!
January 21, 2010 at 7:35 pm
Great for a prom corsage as well. Slow dancing might be hazardous, however.
January 21, 2010 at 8:01 pm
Drew Barrymore strikes again:
http://www.ew.com/ew/gallery/0,,20327336_20337537_10,00.html
January 21, 2010 at 8:02 pm
Comes in handy for the morning after those one-night stands where all you want to do is get in the shower and rub your skin raw.
January 21, 2010 at 8:05 pm
#34 jadey_lady: haha, you could do her marketing!
January 21, 2010 at 8:06 pm
#33: Whisker burns!
January 21, 2010 at 8:15 pm
#4 That is exactly what came to mind here…
January 21, 2010 at 8:16 pm
I think this is pretty fabulous, actually.
January 21, 2010 at 8:17 pm
Ha ha! If I wanted barbed wire wrapped around my neck I’d precariously roll in a hayfield.
But with all due respect, I believe she is actually molding jewelry wire. This piece is a little bit silly, but the rest of her shop is absolutely gorgeous.
January 21, 2010 at 8:22 pm
I bet it’s itchy and scratchy
January 21, 2010 at 8:23 pm
I think she meant to name this one “The Golden Fleecing Of The Consumer”
January 21, 2010 at 8:28 pm
FINALLY! A summer alternative to turtlenecks to cover my hickey…and a built in excuse, too! “No, Ma! I SWEAR it’s a scratch from my necklace!!”
January 21, 2010 at 8:54 pm
It looks like gilded pubes.
January 21, 2010 at 9:13 pm
Great minds think alike, before I scrolled down on this lovely piece of fleece my first thought was Chore Boy! Either that or the cat puked up Christmas tinsel.
January 21, 2010 at 9:30 pm
#5 – at least the earrings aren’t red?
also – for when all you really want to wear is a giant green turd around your neck: http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=33472018
i agree that some of the items this seller has are quite pretty, but some of them are just godawful.
January 21, 2010 at 9:30 pm
wonder how many radio stations she can pick up with that
January 21, 2010 at 9:47 pm
@#8 Raz: LOL, this necklace looks familiar:
http://www.regretsy.com/2009/12/07/two-heads-are-better-than-one-nsfw/
January 21, 2010 at 10:04 pm
I think what’s even worse (besides the price tag and the fact I could clean my aluminum sink with my neck when wearing it) that one that was worse got sold: http://www.etsy.com/view_transaction.php?transaction_id=15449426 It’s like barbed wire around your neck, ugh.
January 21, 2010 at 10:19 pm
I’d ask her to marry me, but she’d play merry hell with my non-stick cookware.
January 21, 2010 at 11:01 pm
It’s kinda pretty actually. But it’s the price …. and the unimpressive mere 10 yards of “wire” … which has me worried. Those “flower” earrings on her site are the scary pieces
January 21, 2010 at 11:06 pm
oh snap… bring on the pubic hair comments…
January 21, 2010 at 11:07 pm
This is the most stylish garrote that I have ever seen. And I’ve seen quite a few.
January 21, 2010 at 11:58 pm
skully- yes, that is so right! LOL
and ninjagato
January 22, 2010 at 1:42 am
I never thought of putting a price tag on tangled wire. I usually swear at it in frustration and throw it out.
January 22, 2010 at 1:58 am
A lot of her stuff is nice, but seriously overpriced for what it is.
January 22, 2010 at 3:24 am
Crack beads apparently sold separately.
January 22, 2010 at 4:51 am
Helen Killer, you are awesome!
My first thought was chore boy copper pads!
I used to work at a 24-hour grocery store where we sold them. Apparently people would steal them to aid in their crack smoking…
Perhaps that explains the circle of life of this piece?
January 22, 2010 at 4:56 am
It looks like it would be really really itchy. I get itchy just looking at it.
January 22, 2010 at 4:59 am
I cannot believe that at a mere $350.00 no one has snatched up this gem of neckware yet!
January 22, 2010 at 5:45 am
thanks #3…i just spent way too much time learning about merkins
http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/743/what-is-a-merkin
January 22, 2010 at 6:19 am
Finally, a necklace you can wear twice! This piece can take you from night to day. Wear it out to the club and soak in the stares (NO one is going to have one but you!). But that’s not the best part, because the next morning at work the office buzz will be all about you and your fascinating neck rash!
January 22, 2010 at 6:50 am
This is what I imagine Dr. Manhattan’s pubes would look like.
January 22, 2010 at 7:33 am
Ok, you can definitely knit with wire. I see what she’s done here. But the spun comment is what throws me. It looks like she knit up a length of wire and then fucked it up somehow and molded the fucked up mess into this, stuck it on a necklace, and called it “art”.
January 22, 2010 at 7:54 am
I used to know a redhead with pubes like that. Good-looking guy, too! This doesn’t have a bit of the same appeal.
January 22, 2010 at 8:38 am
i think most of her stuff is beautiful, seems a bit overpriced, but at the same time, i dont have the know how long it takes to knit wire, but im sure it takes a lot of patience. Not sure if this peice is really wearable, but i have some of those not so practical pieces in my collection as well..
January 22, 2010 at 8:47 am
But whatever DID happen to Donnie Most?
January 22, 2010 at 9:02 am
also worth noting that she doesn’t even say what kind of wire it is …
January 22, 2010 at 9:21 am
Her other stuff is rather nice, but this is too funny. Is the wire gold? For $350 it better be, but that’s an expensive Chore Boy!
January 22, 2010 at 9:21 am
oops bad typos damn! sorry guys! i should go to bed!
#67 yeah i thought that wasn’t a good thing considering the price…
January 22, 2010 at 9:28 am
Some of her pieces are pretty, but this one just reminded me of endometriosis.
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=20373985
January 22, 2010 at 11:28 am
This brought to mind something I once said about my friends mother.
That she was like hugging steel wool, you could do it, but why would you want to?
January 22, 2010 at 12:21 pm
You know those awful wire binding machines that businesses use for white papers, brochures, et cetera? When I was gainfully employed and one of the pages was missing/wrong/etc, I had to rip ‘em open and the wire would be all stringy-weird. I’d then take about 4-5 minutes of company time to sculpt a figure out of said wire mass. I mean, waste not want not right? I worked with a SCAD grad and I am proud to say my work was almost as impressive. It was black wire, and not “gold,” alas.
January 22, 2010 at 5:00 pm
look at her chest just below the brillo and you see she DOES have a rash coming up!!
January 22, 2010 at 9:17 pm
I like the Playtex tampon earrings but the redhead merkin, not so much.
January 22, 2010 at 9:39 pm
the true question is: does the carpet match the fucking hideous necklace?
January 23, 2010 at 12:13 am
Hmm… Nice hairball!
I think it would look smashing against a bright white t-shirt–nothing like a little chest hair sneaking out the top to make all the guys swoon! Rrrrrrrowr!