A cockroach made of toenails! How cute is that? I wish I’d seen this in time for Christmas. I just gave everyone the same old maggot and dogshit candles.
Is that even true? That shit about fingernails being attached to our bones? Sounds made-up.
Especially since I believe elephant ivory is like teeth. So wouldn’t human “ivory” be teeth too? Ergo this is not the first vendor of “human ivory” to be featured on Regretsy …
Not the last time I checked (while dissecting actual human hands), nor the last time I googled (which took all of two seconds). The nail is formed by the germinal matrix, which is epidermis, NOT skeletal structure. And it doesn’t pierce through the skin from the bone- nails are a product of the skin.
#22 the belly button lint is nauseating. How do people even come up with this? Maybe if I view enough of these listings I will be able to sell sculptures made out of my own vomit. On Etsy.
Now, you know me and my love of all things creepy and two headed, but I think I might have to draw the line at belly button lint. I doubt that it is entirely made of that, unless she walks around stealing it from strangers.
hahaaha! I like the belly button lint bears! And apparently, I am not alone. Who wants to bet those sell by the end of the day tomorrow? Anyone? Hahaa. You guys get grossed out too much. I’m laughing my ass off! I’m sure she washes the lint before she uses it… and the nails are in resin. Now if there was skin on the fingernails… now that would be a little gross.
Fingernail clippings, navel lint and ear wax all fall into the same category as barf, poop, snot, slobber, etc. I can only barely deal with my own or my children’s but anyone else’s makes me gag.
hahhaahahahahhahaahahahahahaha
it’s only gross if you read the wiki entry emilyhighfash posted. Now, that does make kinda gross, but for fucksake, three years ago all the celebs were running around with penis bone necklaces on! At least these are behind glass!
#23 underemployed: You’re right, and that is bugging (get it, bugging? oh, man) the hell out of me too. I’m a masseuse and studied anatomy and can tell you without double-checking that fingernails are in NO WAY attached to the bones. They don’t “pierce through the skin”. They are attached only to the skin of the human body.
ok, really. I can’t stop laughing! my face is starting to hurt and I won’t have to do sit ups for a week. I haven’t been tickled like this since some of the hanukkah presents… oh man! my eyes are starting to water!
Why not make jewelry out of snot while you’re at it? Our bodies creates this all on its own with no intake (as fecal matter needs). and a snot roach, imagine that!
Where in the hell does she get her “worker materials”? In my 45 years of life on this earth, I have never produced, collected from others, or even imaginedthere could exist this much belly button lint. And the toenail? From a corpse? Ripped off of his/her own body to make 35 effing dollars? Jesus Christ…
**taking swig from bottle of wine, to wash away taste of barf**
you know what this reminds me of! I remember once when I was little I asked my mom if I could start collecting all my hair and finger nail clippings in jars for the rest of my life. I always was glad she said no. NOW i feel jipped.
Holy shit, what the fuck is going on with
this seller…the level of grossness is just
unbelievable! ..a conversation starter?
Sure, I’ll start- Check this out, I got
SOMEBODY ELSE’S ear wax!
Watch them people slowly backing out…
for fuck’s sake.
I hope I get pregnant with twins so that I could preserve their umbilical cords. And when they turn 10 I will make myself a pair of Umbilical cord earrings to celebrate.
So, wait..those lint bears..the seller sits there
and picks on her belly button every day to collect
“supplies” for her “artwork”?
Wow, i can’t get over this..
Oh man, I missed the boat this holiday season. I could have made a fortune selling snot santas and earwax elves on etsy. That’s OK, valentines day will be here soon. I’d better start making my hangnail hearts so I can get them listed in time!
#21: fuck, the belly button lint teddy bears just about gave me a seizure. how the fuck did she make so many bears? did she go to a football stadium and pass a collection jar?
ninjagato, as usual, i am your siamese belly button lint bear twin, for i also thought those bears to be made of DRYER lint…no possible way could she find that much belly button lint…ew. they are cute bears though, but if they’re really from someone’s dried skin flakes, hair and clothing lint (like the wiki definition says), then i am all set.
as for the fingernails, why not just get some press-on/acrylic nails? way less disturbing…
yeah sudabaki, i was being semi-sarcastic, and i DO remember those disgusting earrings…LOLLL
thanks for the visual reminder, though…hahaha!
i like what the artist says in her welcome message-
“*Custom-orders are more than welcome. You can send me YOUR clippings if you wish Don’t be shy!”
After I clip my nails, the last thing on earth I wanna do is save them & mail them to someone. I am assuming she has to sterlize them just b/c you know some people don’t always hand wash…
You know what would make this piece REALLY snazzy? Toenail (or fingernail) clippings with the nailpolish still on. And make a mosaic out of different colors of chipped nails. We’re talking Haute Couture!
You mean to tell me you picked this instead of the Teddy Bears made of belly button lint? http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=31390715
Toenail clippings are pretty gross, but the idea of making something out of your own belly button lint makes me nauseous.
I find myself at odds with the idea of people referring to finger- or toe-nail clippings as human ivory. They have very little in common.
Second of all, I have problems with this seller marketing this abortion as a cockroach. I’m wondering if I should shave my pubes for a few months, knit it into a sweater, and market it as human wool.
Finally, the fun fact about fingernails growing out of your finger bones makes this seller sound like a remarkable douchebag.
As an ICU nurse I have seen some disgusting body products but it never occurred to me that I could make some money off of them. No wait we have discussed selling snot as a permanent adhesive, but I’m sure these etsy folks already know about that!
#102, I shit you not, there’s actually a market for placenta. It’s a delicacy to some bc of its nutritional value. My husband refused to let me put it online for sale. What? It’s technically homemade! @@
OMG, this took me back to my childhood, when I used to paw through my parents’ jewelry box. One day I found a beautiful black velvet ring box I’d never seen before. What was inside? My dad’s big toenail! He had dropped something heavy on it, and about a month later, the whole nail came off. He thought it would be funny to put it in a ring box where one of us kids would be certain to run across it.
It did not resemble a cockroach, though I would have been less traumatized had it been…
OMG, I had to refrain from screaming as I’m sitting here slogging through my daughter’s homework with her. That was truly awe inspiring and I’m having a very hard time keeping a straight face.
Yeah, didn’t we share a placenta? Remember those were the days… floating effortlessly you’d kick me in the face and I’d kick you in the face. Good times.
I’m still in Voodoo doll mode from a previous post.
I spent all day trying to figure out how to get Beyonce’s finger or toe nails.
Now I can convince her it is for ‘ewige Kunst’.
I totally agree with #24 underemployed and others that labeling nails as Human Ivory is a missuse of the term, but there’s true Human Ivory on Etsy as well!
and for my third post, this here is not belly button lint, its lint from a washing machine. Honestly she would need to collect lint from hundreds of people to get that much, unless she is really really filthy
This is actually making me gag. Nail clippings and earwax gross me out more than anything else human-body related. (even worse than the other obvious candidates.)
Im surprised nobody has made anything of earwax yet.
Fuck it. If this bull shit sells I will eat lots of bread and cheese so my shit is rock solid. I’ll form my shit into teddy bears and schilack them. I’ll call the materials “Organic compound”, make money, and laugh knowing that my turds are in a curio cabinet sitting next to Precious Moments figurines.
Oh, Jeez, I’m very familiar with the area from where our seller hails and it’s no surprise this is the whimsicle fuckery that emanates from that region. I’m sure 50% of the population could construct creatures from their nails.
This. is. disgusting.
OMG, a person would wear this and someone else would say “cool necklace”. And the first person would say “it’s made out of human fingernails”. And the second person would say “wow, you let your fingernails grow really long” and the first person would say “they’re actually someone else’s fingernails”.
And if I witnessed this conversation, I would now be gouging my eyeballs out…hopefully in private so no one would take them and use them to make more…
#133 has it right. The entire area is downwind from Dow Chemical effluent… clearly, a setting that would influence the conceptualization and content of arts and crafts.
We North Americans of the new millenium pride ourselves in being unhung up and hip, and yet fingernail art has inspired this outpouring of loathing. Make that self-loathing– disgust with the body and a fear of mortality. I’ve seen these pieces close up and they are not only cleverly conceived but also beautiful to behold. The Victorians would have loved them– too bad our own era is so damned uptight.
nEXT year i’m a make a toe nail christmas wreath so all my guests can puke as they come in the front door. I may or may not paint all the nails green and red. I may even use some of my pets nail clippings for garnish.
This is the most disgusting piece of crap i feel like vomiting and will not be able to finish my morning coffee. shame on u cockroach bastard.
This is nasty and fowl. I am glad the seller took it down. What is next, personal pubic hair pendants with dog drool? People need to use common sense. No one wants your dirty toe nails or whatever. Unless they are Michael Jackson’s old toenails and some weirdo will acually buy them…
@ babbins: Not delighting in the excretions and processes of other people’s bodies doesn’t translate into a disgust with your own. People feel perfectly comfortable picking their own noses, but asking someone to buy your snot on a necklace is a different story.
This necklace is really starting to grow on me. I just clipped my infant’s nails and think I will mail them to her. I’d like a butterfly or a spider. nk.
So these are truly made by thier feet. Not only is the concept gross and disgusting but the idea of wearing what looks like a tick around my neck is equally as revolting.
I know! These could be sold as a diet aid. One look and you are not going to want to eat for a while.
Artist have been using human parts – hair, bone, teeth etc for the history of man kind. Victorian hair jewelry as an example.
This is just bad science. Finger nails aren’t ivory. They don’t pierce the skin (ouch). Fingernails are bone with Keratin they are not living material, bone is. They are closer to hair. This does not resemble a roach. It is not amber in color or substance. It is also not a fossil.
Sudabaki, I want you to be the first to know… I’m going green (IF wordpress will ever publish my uploaded image). It’s not that I don’t want to look like you but I really need to become an individual. I had good times sharing the placenta with you and all. I hope you understand and this won’t change things between us. You’ll always be my number one thumbs down.
#162 Fo5ter: No, no, I understand. We are after all not identical. It’s good that we each celebrate our own individuality and people do seem to get us confused. Just yesterday someone called me fo5,er-sudabaki. I barely recognize myself anymore.
Oh and did you clear your cache? I had to do that when I switched from the dustpan.
Not to be pedantic, but not only are fingernails not an extension of your fingers (which you can totally tell just by LOOKING DOWN AT YOUR FINGERS) as others have pointed out. But they aren’t even bone!
Fingernails are made of keratin. It’s the same stuff hair is made of.
All of which presents me with the delightful thought of a lawsuit for misrepresentation of goods sold being brought against this seller. “You said it was ivory, but it’s not made of bone at all!”
Fun Mythology Fact! In Norse lore, the boat that will bring the zombie army at the end of the world will be made of dead people’s nails. So by using them elsewhere, this artist is providing a service to all mankind.
There are certain crafters who could benefit from having a Sybian at their disposal. This crafter is possibly one of them. Let’s establish an initiative to satisfy this seller with a Sybian. Google it if you don’t know.
Actually, your comment reminded me of the part in the “Borat…” movie where he attempts to bail himself out of damaing the Confederate Antique Shop with the promise of bags of “hair from a pubis”, to be sent at a later date.
i have this bag next to my dryer in which i collect my dryer-lint… instead of throwing it out, maybe i’ll make a sculpture. it collects faster than belly-buttons anyway
Just so you know, the artist has gotten a lot of people ordering her human ivory and bellybutton lint bears as a result of Regretsy. As well as being featured on television. So, thanks Regretsy.
This seller, as mentioned, has been on television twice with her work, on the Science Channel show “Oddities.”
When she brought out the nails, the one guy’s reaction was priceless. I have to kinda agree with him; nails are gross, but when they’re in resin, it’s not so bad. Pretty neat, actually.
The worst part? She doesn’t clean the nails when she uses them. She said that she has a jar and a nail clipper out at craft shows, with a sign that says, “Clip at your own risk.” She gets her nails from craft show-goers, and she doesn’t clean them. How does she know where those nails have been?!
Still and all, I kind of like some of her designs. They just need to stay in the resin.
January 11, 2010 at 5:48 pm
Oh man the person who made this is sad and took the listing down already.
January 11, 2010 at 5:50 pm
Hmm… I kind of like it, actually.
Ha ha! No, I’m kidding! I want to stab my eyes out.
January 11, 2010 at 5:51 pm
doesn’t look like a cockroach – but does remind me of the time i ripped my fingernail out. Either way, this is painful.
January 11, 2010 at 5:51 pm
How the heck to the sellers find out so quickly? Are they just refreshing Regretsy throughout the day?
January 11, 2010 at 5:53 pm
No it was my fault. I fixed it.
January 11, 2010 at 5:53 pm
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January 11, 2010 at 5:55 pm
Excuse me while I throwz up.
January 11, 2010 at 5:55 pm
This is unbelievably gross.
January 11, 2010 at 5:56 pm
It can be found here http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=37995373&ref=sr_gallery_2&&ga_search_query=human+ivory&ga_search_type=handmade&ga_page=&includes=tags&includes=title
Nasty, nasty. “Human Ivory”. Do an etsy search. There are many whimsicle items.
January 11, 2010 at 5:56 pm
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January 11, 2010 at 5:56 pm
I want to know how long the person had to grow their toenails for to get a nail of that length.
Which toenail do you think this is?
I vote for pinky toe!
January 11, 2010 at 5:57 pm
I’m kind of slow tonight. I don’t even understand what it actually is.
January 11, 2010 at 5:57 pm
Oh My Fucking God.
January 11, 2010 at 5:58 pm
I have to say… I’m actually a little nauseated. This is like half a step above an earwax sculpture for me.
January 11, 2010 at 6:01 pm
I think some of them may be made up of several, toe or fingernail clippings lined up. However it’s done, it’s revolting
January 11, 2010 at 6:03 pm
ok i just threw up a little
and by a little i mean a lot
January 11, 2010 at 6:03 pm
Gives new meaning to “hand made”
January 11, 2010 at 6:03 pm
She sells these at the Mutter Museum…I actually have to respect that.
January 11, 2010 at 6:04 pm
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January 11, 2010 at 6:05 pm
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=37993801
January 11, 2010 at 6:06 pm
Oh hell…I thought the roach was bad. This is worse:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=31390715
January 11, 2010 at 6:06 pm
Hey! I didn’t get my maggot and dog shit candle! anyone else?
Oh no she didn’t!
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=37258546
I’ll take one of those and a toe jam teddy please.
Talk about recycling. Kudos for originality though.
January 11, 2010 at 6:06 pm
Ok..the nails are not an extension of the phalanges. But that’s the very least of the things that is wrong about this artistic medium.
January 11, 2010 at 6:07 pm
Is that even true? That shit about fingernails being attached to our bones? Sounds made-up.
Especially since I believe elephant ivory is like teeth. So wouldn’t human “ivory” be teeth too? Ergo this is not the first vendor of “human ivory” to be featured on Regretsy …
January 11, 2010 at 6:08 pm
Nice, commented on the wrong entry. Sigh.
January 11, 2010 at 6:08 pm
Gawd. I’m so glad I didn’t see this till after dinner.
I can’t even come up with something snarky to say.
January 11, 2010 at 6:08 pm
Be afraid, be very afraid. I know I am.
January 11, 2010 at 6:09 pm
“directly connected to the distal phalanges”
Not the last time I checked (while dissecting actual human hands), nor the last time I googled (which took all of two seconds). The nail is formed by the germinal matrix, which is epidermis, NOT skeletal structure. And it doesn’t pierce through the skin from the bone- nails are a product of the skin.
January 11, 2010 at 6:10 pm
In this case, she *DID* make it with her feet!
January 11, 2010 at 6:10 pm
#22 Frankenkitty: Holy bloody fucking Christ! That was disgusting!
January 11, 2010 at 6:10 pm
#22 the belly button lint is nauseating. How do people even come up with this? Maybe if I view enough of these listings I will be able to sell sculptures made out of my own vomit. On Etsy.
January 11, 2010 at 6:11 pm
#26 DucksNew: Oh dear. I wonder how many years of “belly button lint” collecting it took to made these cute little teddy bears
January 11, 2010 at 6:13 pm
Hey Pantsmonkey, do you mean earwax like this: http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=31392407 I like this. It makes me laugh!
January 11, 2010 at 6:14 pm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Navel_lint
January 11, 2010 at 6:16 pm
Now, you know me and my love of all things creepy and two headed, but I think I might have to draw the line at belly button lint. I doubt that it is entirely made of that, unless she walks around stealing it from strangers.
January 11, 2010 at 6:16 pm
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January 11, 2010 at 6:16 pm
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January 11, 2010 at 6:17 pm
I had never heard the phrase ‘human ivory’ before…
This makes me faintly nauseous…
Toenails gross me out when they are still attached to the person.
January 11, 2010 at 6:17 pm
#30 AndreaN: OMG I just saw that! I’m so freaked out I can barely type!!! *staggers off to barf in the trash*
January 11, 2010 at 6:17 pm
*facepalm*
I swear unto all that I consider holy (my bottle of Rum), if this shit continues to sell, I may have to hang up my cleats.
January 11, 2010 at 6:18 pm
AndreaN: wouldn’t washing belly button lint be sort of like washing dirt? Wouldn’t it be all gone after a washing?? puzzled.
January 11, 2010 at 6:20 pm
Fingernail clippings, navel lint and ear wax all fall into the same category as barf, poop, snot, slobber, etc. I can only barely deal with my own or my children’s but anyone else’s makes me gag.
January 11, 2010 at 6:20 pm
#32, I’m guessing maybe she knows people with extremely deep belly buttons and a love of fuzzy clothing
January 11, 2010 at 6:20 pm
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January 11, 2010 at 6:21 pm
Where is she collecting these fingernails? Bums? Doctors?
January 11, 2010 at 6:21 pm
by the way that belly button lint is actually dryer lint. I think this seller is missing a chromosome.
January 11, 2010 at 6:22 pm
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January 11, 2010 at 6:22 pm
I’m holding out for a new set of piano keys.
January 11, 2010 at 6:22 pm
#23 underemployed: You’re right, and that is bugging (get it, bugging? oh, man) the hell out of me too. I’m a masseuse and studied anatomy and can tell you without double-checking that fingernails are in NO WAY attached to the bones. They don’t “pierce through the skin”. They are attached only to the skin of the human body.
Aside from all of that, it’s totally disgusting.
January 11, 2010 at 6:23 pm
ok, really. I can’t stop laughing! my face is starting to hurt and I won’t have to do sit ups for a week. I haven’t been tickled like this since some of the hanukkah presents… oh man! my eyes are starting to water!
January 11, 2010 at 6:26 pm
its just super gross to combine nail clipping with a cockroach! Haha, otherwise if you didnt know what it is it’s rather delicate and pretty.
January 11, 2010 at 6:26 pm
Why not make jewelry out of snot while you’re at it? Our bodies creates this all on its own with no intake (as fecal matter needs). and a snot roach, imagine that!
January 11, 2010 at 6:26 pm
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=31397944
When you tire of “human ivory” you can move on to bird poop.
January 11, 2010 at 6:27 pm
Oh and btw I thought roach clippings was going to be about, uh… a very different type of roach if yanowhaddamean.
January 11, 2010 at 6:28 pm
Where in the hell does she get her “worker materials”? In my 45 years of life on this earth, I have never produced, collected from others, or even imaginedthere could exist this much belly button lint. And the toenail? From a corpse? Ripped off of his/her own body to make 35 effing dollars? Jesus Christ…
**taking swig from bottle of wine, to wash away taste of barf**
January 11, 2010 at 6:29 pm
Okay, imagine appropriate spacing between “imagined” and “there”.
**Another swig**
January 11, 2010 at 6:30 pm
you know what this reminds me of! I remember once when I was little I asked my mom if I could start collecting all my hair and finger nail clippings in jars for the rest of my life. I always was glad she said no. NOW i feel jipped.
January 11, 2010 at 6:32 pm
Holy shit, what the fuck is going on with
this seller…the level of grossness is just
unbelievable! ..a conversation starter?
Sure, I’ll start- Check this out, I got
SOMEBODY ELSE’S ear wax!
Watch them people slowly backing out…
for fuck’s sake.
January 11, 2010 at 6:34 pm
Peacocktaco : It’s never too late to start!
I hope I get pregnant with twins so that I could preserve their umbilical cords. And when they turn 10 I will make myself a pair of Umbilical cord earrings to celebrate.
January 11, 2010 at 6:35 pm
Seriously not the thing to look at when you’re sick in bed and feeling a little nauseated because now I’m 1000x more.
January 11, 2010 at 6:39 pm
So, wait..those lint bears..the seller sits there
and picks on her belly button every day to collect
“supplies” for her “artwork”?
Wow, i can’t get over this..
At least she doesn’t spend any money on supplies.
January 11, 2010 at 6:41 pm
Roaches= Gross
Toenail clippings= Gross
roaches+toenail clippings= Things you find in a crackhouse
January 11, 2010 at 6:42 pm
I totally whant to buy one of her ”teddy bears made of belly button lint”. Hahahahah.
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=31390715
January 11, 2010 at 6:44 pm
Oh man, I missed the boat this holiday season. I could have made a fortune selling snot santas and earwax elves on etsy. That’s OK, valentines day will be here soon. I’d better start making my hangnail hearts so I can get them listed in time!
Sorry to be gross but this is one revolting item!
January 11, 2010 at 6:47 pm
#62 Tattcat :
“roaches+toenail clippings= Things you find in a crackhouse”
You’re mistaken Tattcat, I shake and sweat on crack. I make cute jewelery from body parts when I’m on a meth binge.
January 11, 2010 at 6:54 pm
#21: fuck, the belly button lint teddy bears just about gave me a seizure. how the fuck did she make so many bears? did she go to a football stadium and pass a collection jar?
January 11, 2010 at 6:55 pm
Aw- hells- no. What next, a “booger pin”???
No, wait, don’t tell me . I really don’t want to know.
January 11, 2010 at 7:00 pm
#67 blondeweezie :
Aw- hells- no. What next, a “booger pin”???
No, wait, don’t tell me . I really don’t want to know.
…
oh God, NOOOOOOOO.
So gross.
January 11, 2010 at 7:00 pm
#22 “Oh no she didn’t!”
My thoughts exactly.
January 11, 2010 at 7:01 pm
Why the HELL would you want a pendant of someone’s fingernails or a sculpture of earwax??
Gross. Just gross. EW.
January 11, 2010 at 7:02 pm
I see a gap in the market, rings made from found chewing gum. There is plenty available and they’d all be OOAK.
January 11, 2010 at 7:07 pm
C# F# G# Play it on your piano. Tickle the ebonies. Sounds like shit, but a bonafide black chord.
January 11, 2010 at 7:08 pm
ninjagato, as usual, i am your siamese belly button lint bear twin, for i also thought those bears to be made of DRYER lint…no possible way could she find that much belly button lint…ew. they are cute bears though, but if they’re really from someone’s dried skin flakes, hair and clothing lint (like the wiki definition says), then i am all set.
as for the fingernails, why not just get some press-on/acrylic nails? way less disturbing…
January 11, 2010 at 7:10 pm
#73 razberries :
“as for the fingernails, why not just get some press-on/acrylic nails? way less disturbing… ”
Raz, there were a pair of earrings here that were made from press on nails. At the time I thought they were pretty gross. That was until I saw this.
January 11, 2010 at 7:16 pm
Fingernails weren’t bones when I went to school. When did this phenomenon occur?
January 11, 2010 at 7:16 pm
yeah sudabaki, i was being semi-sarcastic, and i DO remember those disgusting earrings…LOLLL
thanks for the visual reminder, though…hahaha!
i like what the artist says in her welcome message-
“*Custom-orders are more than welcome. You can send me YOUR clippings if you wish
Don’t be shy!”
After I clip my nails, the last thing on earth I wanna do is save them & mail them to someone. I am assuming she has to sterlize them just b/c you know some people don’t always hand wash…
January 11, 2010 at 7:18 pm
Anybody wanna buy a booger?
January 11, 2010 at 7:18 pm
I can see it now… bracelets made out of grandmother’s false teeth. Or how about threading dried-up-contact-lenses for a “crystal” necklace.
I’m going to be a millionaire!
January 11, 2010 at 7:19 pm
Fingernails are epidermal (skin) tissue, NOT skeletal. In no way are your fingernails directly connected to your distal phalanges.
Hopefully she ‘realizes’ that the inspiration for her art is incorrect and stops making these.
January 11, 2010 at 7:23 pm
emilyhighfash…someone already beat you to it…fyi…
http://www.regretsy.com/2009/12/21/all-i-want-for-christmas/#comments
January 11, 2010 at 7:25 pm
#77 PussDaddy :
“Anybody wanna buy a booger?”
No thanks, I just scrape the dry ones from walls when I happen upon them.
January 11, 2010 at 7:28 pm
pussdaddy, when we went to school pluto was still a planet too
January 11, 2010 at 7:31 pm
#80 razberries : rats!
January 11, 2010 at 7:31 pm
You know what would make this piece REALLY snazzy? Toenail (or fingernail) clippings with the nailpolish still on. And make a mosaic out of different colors of chipped nails. We’re talking Haute Couture!
January 11, 2010 at 7:42 pm
If you locked Marta Stewart into a dark cellar with no windows for about 5 years…she’d probably start making $hit like this…
January 11, 2010 at 7:49 pm
You mean to tell me you picked this instead of the Teddy Bears made of belly button lint? http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=31390715
Toenail clippings are pretty gross, but the idea of making something out of your own belly button lint makes me nauseous.
January 11, 2010 at 7:49 pm
Where is the Say What Guy when you need him?
January 11, 2010 at 7:50 pm
Anybody care to clue the Artiste in on the fact that Michael’s and Hobby Lobby and several other retailers purvey actual, legitimate crafting medium?
January 11, 2010 at 7:57 pm
I haven’t a clue why, but I like the lint teddy bears. I know what I’m taking to the family dirty Santa party next year!
January 11, 2010 at 7:59 pm
@ #86, It’s not really belly button lint. Those ARE really toenails.
January 11, 2010 at 8:03 pm
This doesn’t look like an insect. Maybe a cuttlefish…
January 11, 2010 at 8:05 pm
I don’t know if she’s trying to sound smart, but finger and toe nails are in no way bones or part of our skeleton.
January 11, 2010 at 8:18 pm
It’s a cockroach made out of nail clippings? And someone’s supposed to wear it as jewelry? ew.
January 11, 2010 at 8:22 pm
ewwwww X infinity
January 11, 2010 at 8:23 pm
I find myself at odds with the idea of people referring to finger- or toe-nail clippings as human ivory. They have very little in common.
Second of all, I have problems with this seller marketing this abortion as a cockroach. I’m wondering if I should shave my pubes for a few months, knit it into a sweater, and market it as human wool.
Finally, the fun fact about fingernails growing out of your finger bones makes this seller sound like a remarkable douchebag.
January 11, 2010 at 8:26 pm
Oh good lord, I sent a friend to look at this and she bought something.
January 11, 2010 at 8:28 pm
Human vomit became my medium upon viewing people’s reaction to my artwork.
January 11, 2010 at 8:36 pm
How many people do you suppose you could make if you gathered up all the missing chromosomes from all the regretsy sellers?
January 11, 2010 at 8:36 pm
minus the cool ones of course
January 11, 2010 at 8:38 pm
Wait, does this mean that we can now sell our nail clippings as art supplies?
January 11, 2010 at 8:43 pm
oh #94 whimsey….you should google up Merkin. I’m sure there’s a “niche” market somewhere on the internetz.
Dynomoose – you should really be more discerning about your friends. Starting with Friend-who-buys-body-bits. Ew.
January 11, 2010 at 8:47 pm
As an ICU nurse I have seen some disgusting body products but it never occurred to me that I could make some money off of them. No wait we have discussed selling snot as a permanent adhesive, but I’m sure these etsy folks already know about that!
January 11, 2010 at 8:47 pm
And now, because I have lint bears all mixed up in my head with today’s earlier post, I present:
http://twitpic.com/xr8l1
January 11, 2010 at 8:50 pm
#102, I shit you not, there’s actually a market for placenta. It’s a delicacy to some bc of its nutritional value. My husband refused to let me put it online for sale. What? It’s technically homemade! @@
http://www.twilightheadquarters.com/placenta.html
January 11, 2010 at 8:53 pm
OMGah I just laughed so hard I cried.
January 11, 2010 at 8:55 pm
OMG, this took me back to my childhood, when I used to paw through my parents’ jewelry box. One day I found a beautiful black velvet ring box I’d never seen before. What was inside? My dad’s big toenail! He had dropped something heavy on it, and about a month later, the whole nail came off. He thought it would be funny to put it in a ring box where one of us kids would be certain to run across it.
It did not resemble a cockroach, though I would have been less traumatized had it been…
January 11, 2010 at 8:56 pm
…a real cockroach.
January 11, 2010 at 8:57 pm
#103 sunshynegrll:
OMG, I had to refrain from screaming as I’m sitting here slogging through my daughter’s homework with her. That was truly awe inspiring and I’m having a very hard time keeping a straight face.
January 11, 2010 at 8:59 pm
#104 Fo5ter: I would hate you for posting that link with no warning if we weren’t twins.
January 11, 2010 at 9:03 pm
Yeah, didn’t we share a placenta? Remember those were the days… floating effortlessly you’d kick me in the face and I’d kick you in the face. Good times.
January 11, 2010 at 9:03 pm
#103 That is the most awesome thing I’ve seen all day!
January 11, 2010 at 9:07 pm
I agree with 111! I liked the lint bears to begin with but you just sealed the deal. You rock.
January 11, 2010 at 9:30 pm
I’m still in Voodoo doll mode from a previous post.
I spent all day trying to figure out how to get Beyonce’s finger or toe nails.
Now I can convince her it is for ‘ewige Kunst’.
January 11, 2010 at 9:37 pm
@29 vintagevamp–
classic!
Elephant ivory is tragic, but human ivory is just vomitous.
January 11, 2010 at 9:44 pm
#114 IscreamUscream: Not to go off topic but I have been looking at your photos and they are beautiful.
January 11, 2010 at 9:48 pm
Amazingly, they pierce through our skin and reside on the outside of our bodies.
I think she’s thinking of Wolverine.
January 11, 2010 at 9:56 pm
If toenails are human ivory, maybe pubes are human wool and I should take up knitting. Who wants a scarf?
January 11, 2010 at 9:56 pm
Thanks guys. So much fun makin’ weird art weirder.
Sudabaki, I still see a dustpan as your avatar.
Just prank-called Domino’s to ask for a placenta pizza.
January 11, 2010 at 10:02 pm
#117 sunshynegrll: I had to clear out my cache to see my new avi when I changed it. Do you see Fo5ter’s red thumbs up?
Domino’s pizza is about as appealing to me as placenta. I bet they love you there.
January 11, 2010 at 10:11 pm
I think my middle finger has enough nail clipping potential to respond to this piece.
January 11, 2010 at 10:20 pm
I like the phrase ‘Human Ivory’, but yuck!
I could find so many better things to encase in resin than my toenail clippings.
thought: I wonder if I could save my nail clippings and sell them to this person. lol
January 11, 2010 at 11:05 pm
You know I’ve been thinking about this one and both nail clippings and cockroaches are gross. Why would you combine the two?
January 12, 2010 at 12:07 am
I totally agree with #24 underemployed and others that labeling nails as Human Ivory is a missuse of the term, but there’s true Human Ivory on Etsy as well!
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=37466165
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=31991195
January 12, 2010 at 1:24 am
#103 sunshynegrll: Outstanding!
January 12, 2010 at 1:37 am
Why didn’t you share the two headed teddy bear made of belly button lint!?!?!
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=37258546
January 12, 2010 at 1:51 am
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January 12, 2010 at 1:52 am
she has a deficiency (not only of creative taste) but her nails are lacking something (yes style) but they are ridged.
she needs to look at her diet
oh.. and close her etsy shop
January 12, 2010 at 1:53 am
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January 12, 2010 at 2:02 am
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=31390715
and for my third post, this here is not belly button lint, its lint from a washing machine. Honestly she would need to collect lint from hundreds of people to get that much, unless she is really really filthy
January 12, 2010 at 2:26 am
p.s. I DO like the lint bears , they are totally
awesomely done ,but the idea of what they’re made of, is turning me off.
January 12, 2010 at 3:56 am
This is actually making me gag. Nail clippings and earwax gross me out more than anything else human-body related. (even worse than the other obvious candidates.)
Im surprised nobody has made anything of earwax yet.
January 12, 2010 at 5:03 am
Fuck it. If this bull shit sells I will eat lots of bread and cheese so my shit is rock solid. I’ll form my shit into teddy bears and schilack them. I’ll call the materials “Organic compound”, make money, and laugh knowing that my turds are in a curio cabinet sitting next to Precious Moments figurines.
January 12, 2010 at 5:14 am
It strikes an odd “chord” for me.
January 12, 2010 at 5:22 am
Oh, Jeez, I’m very familiar with the area from where our seller hails and it’s no surprise this is the whimsicle fuckery that emanates from that region. I’m sure 50% of the population could construct creatures from their nails.
January 12, 2010 at 5:49 am
If she had only used a toenail that didn’t have a fungus, then I would have bought that.
January 12, 2010 at 5:53 am
This. is. disgusting.
OMG, a person would wear this and someone else would say “cool necklace”. And the first person would say “it’s made out of human fingernails”. And the second person would say “wow, you let your fingernails grow really long” and the first person would say “they’re actually someone else’s fingernails”.
And if I witnessed this conversation, I would now be gouging my eyeballs out…hopefully in private so no one would take them and use them to make more…
January 12, 2010 at 5:54 am
god-awful disgusting jewelry.
January 12, 2010 at 5:55 am
#133 has it right. The entire area is downwind from Dow Chemical effluent… clearly, a setting that would influence the conceptualization and content of arts and crafts.
January 12, 2010 at 5:56 am
Perhaps those are Wolverine’s fingernails/toenails/claws she is using for puktastic piece of art.
January 12, 2010 at 6:27 am
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January 12, 2010 at 6:56 am
nEXT year i’m a make a toe nail christmas wreath so all my guests can puke as they come in the front door. I may or may not paint all the nails green and red. I may even use some of my pets nail clippings for garnish.
This is the most disgusting piece of crap i feel like vomiting and will not be able to finish my morning coffee. shame on u cockroach bastard.
January 12, 2010 at 7:02 am
Ooh–disgusting and misinformed! Fingernails are made of keratin, the same stuff as hair, not bone. They aren’t part of our skeletons.
January 12, 2010 at 7:03 am
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January 12, 2010 at 7:43 am
Will you all hate me if I tell you I favorited this shop a long time ago? *ducks*
January 12, 2010 at 7:46 am
#140 averygaskin
ur momz a fowl
January 12, 2010 at 8:04 am
fuck that is so groooosssss. Just the thought that this is made of someone’s nasty toenail….ugh!!!
January 12, 2010 at 8:10 am
I wonder if she was selling toenail Santas with dingleberry beards for Christmas, that would be whimsicle!
January 12, 2010 at 8:19 am
No wonder the lint teddy bears are in glass jars, I bet they smell awful! DO NOT WANT
January 12, 2010 at 8:20 am
How does she get entire toenails? Drop a 50-pound weight on her foot and wait for one to fall off? I find this really confusing.
January 12, 2010 at 8:43 am
@ babbins: Not delighting in the excretions and processes of other people’s bodies doesn’t translate into a disgust with your own. People feel perfectly comfortable picking their own noses, but asking someone to buy your snot on a necklace is a different story.
January 12, 2010 at 8:52 am
This necklace is really starting to grow on me. I just clipped my infant’s nails and think I will mail them to her. I’d like a butterfly or a spider. nk.
January 12, 2010 at 9:00 am
#103 sunshynegrll
Gee thanks for the Placenta recipies. I’m going to go and throw up now.
January 12, 2010 at 9:03 am
So these are truly made by thier feet. Not only is the concept gross and disgusting but the idea of wearing what looks like a tick around my neck is equally as revolting.
I know! These could be sold as a diet aid. One look and you are not going to want to eat for a while.
January 12, 2010 at 9:22 am
Also for Christmas: bloody boogers + dingleberries = delightful Grinch pendant!
January 12, 2010 at 9:31 am
@139 Dix–exactly, ivory are tusks
Although it might be cool to have tusks on ends of fingers. 
#115 Sudabaki–thanks!
January 12, 2010 at 9:40 am
Artist have been using human parts – hair, bone, teeth etc for the history of man kind. Victorian hair jewelry as an example.
This is just bad science. Finger nails aren’t ivory. They don’t pierce the skin (ouch). Fingernails are bone with Keratin they are not living material, bone is. They are closer to hair. This does not resemble a roach. It is not amber in color or substance. It is also not a fossil.
January 12, 2010 at 9:40 am
I always wondered what happened to my childhood friend who picked her scabs and put them in a jar. She was the only one I knew with a scab collection.
January 12, 2010 at 9:57 am
#154 Skully: what the hell was I thinking, reading this while eating??
January 12, 2010 at 10:06 am
Baby Ivory!
http://i48.photobucket.com/albums/f244/dlm305/036-1.jpg
January 12, 2010 at 10:07 am
#159 Fo5ter: I’m proud to call you my twin.
January 12, 2010 at 10:08 am
@#158 Suda: Yeah, you need a strong stomach around here this AM, pretty disgusting. Not as gross as that Hoarders show, though.
January 12, 2010 at 10:14 am
Sudabaki, I want you to be the first to know… I’m going green (IF wordpress will ever publish my uploaded image). It’s not that I don’t want to look like you but I really need to become an individual. I had good times sharing the placenta with you and all. I hope you understand and this won’t change things between us. You’ll always be my number one thumbs down.
January 12, 2010 at 10:22 am
#162 Fo5ter: No, no, I understand. We are after all not identical. It’s good that we each celebrate our own individuality and people do seem to get us confused. Just yesterday someone called me fo5,er-sudabaki. I barely recognize myself anymore.
Oh and did you clear your cache? I had to do that when I switched from the dustpan.
January 12, 2010 at 10:36 am
My cache?! How dare you! JK. I havent a clue how to do so.
January 12, 2010 at 11:26 am
Level 1, late to the party, but WTF:
http://twitpic.com/xtkq2
January 12, 2010 at 11:58 am
Jesus..the stupidity of people never cease to amaze me.
“Copyright”? Really? With Lego and Star Wars?
Get a clue, kiwi!
January 12, 2010 at 11:58 am
Holy shit, wrong section!
Never mind.
January 12, 2010 at 12:05 pm
Great scott, skully! That’s hilarious! And polaroidart, I do the same thing quite often!
January 12, 2010 at 12:12 pm
Not to be pedantic, but not only are fingernails not an extension of your fingers (which you can totally tell just by LOOKING DOWN AT YOUR FINGERS) as others have pointed out. But they aren’t even bone!
Fingernails are made of keratin. It’s the same stuff hair is made of.
All of which presents me with the delightful thought of a lawsuit for misrepresentation of goods sold being brought against this seller. “You said it was ivory, but it’s not made of bone at all!”
January 12, 2010 at 12:22 pm
Ivory comes from teeth, anyway.
January 12, 2010 at 2:12 pm
Damnit – I gotta get here earlier in the day. Somebody made my Wolverine joke.
January 12, 2010 at 2:32 pm
whats with all the thumbs down haters on here?
January 12, 2010 at 7:18 pm
Fun Mythology Fact! In Norse lore, the boat that will bring the zombie army at the end of the world will be made of dead people’s nails. So by using them elsewhere, this artist is providing a service to all mankind.
…That, or the meth thing.
January 12, 2010 at 7:41 pm
Ew
ew ew ew ew ew
January 12, 2010 at 8:38 pm
It takes a lot to freak me out or gross me out but this did. I am disgusted yet cannot look away….
January 12, 2010 at 11:45 pm
#86 painted cups:
That anyone has enough belly button lint to make anything out of I find even more terrifying.
January 13, 2010 at 1:09 am
There are certain crafters who could benefit from having a Sybian at their disposal. This crafter is possibly one of them. Let’s establish an initiative to satisfy this seller with a Sybian. Google it if you don’t know.
January 13, 2010 at 7:57 am
#95 Whimsey-YES, absolutely, you should!
Actually, your comment reminded me of the part in the “Borat…” movie where he attempts to bail himself out of damaing the Confederate Antique Shop with the promise of bags of “hair from a pubis”, to be sent at a later date.
January 14, 2010 at 3:06 am
so gross yet intriguing
January 16, 2010 at 6:30 am
yay! I’m so glad HK finally posted this seller’s ‘work’. I knew y’all would have a gross-out fest over it, and ya didn’t let me down!
February 2, 2010 at 12:27 pm
Voo Doo Doo
March 11, 2010 at 4:00 pm
i have this bag next to my dryer in which i collect my dryer-lint… instead of throwing it out, maybe i’ll make a sculpture. it collects faster than belly-buttons anyway
December 21, 2010 at 8:57 am
Just so you know, the artist has gotten a lot of people ordering her human ivory and bellybutton lint bears as a result of Regretsy. As well as being featured on television. So, thanks Regretsy.
April 22, 2011 at 10:18 pm
I just threw up in my mouth.
June 3, 2011 at 7:53 pm
This seller, as mentioned, has been on television twice with her work, on the Science Channel show “Oddities.”
When she brought out the nails, the one guy’s reaction was priceless. I have to kinda agree with him; nails are gross, but when they’re in resin, it’s not so bad. Pretty neat, actually.
The worst part? She doesn’t clean the nails when she uses them. She said that she has a jar and a nail clipper out at craft shows, with a sign that says, “Clip at your own risk.” She gets her nails from craft show-goers, and she doesn’t clean them. How does she know where those nails have been?!
Still and all, I kind of like some of her designs. They just need to stay in the resin.