Killer Purse
If someone I loved was murdered, and I saw some idiot prancing into Starbucks with this piece of crap on their arm, I would knock their fucking teeth out. Then I would tell the cop that assault and battery is born of friendship.
If someone I loved was murdered, and I saw some idiot prancing into Starbucks with this piece of crap on their arm, I would knock their fucking teeth out. Then I would tell the cop that assault and battery is born of friendship.
You must be logged in to post a comment.
January 4, 2010 at 4:34 pm
is this atrisan related to th resident artist that made the Charlotte’s web W.F.?
January 4, 2010 at 4:37 pm
I love that the knife was added for a “nicer” feel.
January 4, 2010 at 4:40 pm
That is some fucked up, repugnant shit.
January 4, 2010 at 4:40 pm
Boy. 2010 is gonna be a turd of a year, isn’t it?
January 4, 2010 at 4:41 pm
Krap is born of Kalliber.
January 4, 2010 at 4:41 pm
now I have stabby feelings, too.
January 4, 2010 at 4:41 pm
This would be the perfect accessories for picking someone up at the airport.
January 4, 2010 at 4:41 pm
what does a spider web have to do with murder anyway?
January 4, 2010 at 4:42 pm
The threat of violence does always give a handbag a nicer feel.
January 4, 2010 at 4:43 pm
That is just insane! Was this made in prison in an art class for serial killers?
January 4, 2010 at 4:43 pm
Damn,
I was all for the neat clasp closure but the blood splatters kinda ruined it for me.
Also, what’s a Mucler?
January 4, 2010 at 4:43 pm
Appears to be celebrating murder. Will the next one be celebrating rape? I really don’t like to think about where this theme might take us.
January 4, 2010 at 4:43 pm
I know that when I love someone, I stare deeply into their eyes and whisper seductively, “I murder you.”
For some reason, they get all freaked out and run away.
January 4, 2010 at 4:44 pm
Yeah..but try to slap a pair of tits on a bag,
and you’ll have to call it mature and hide the 1st picture.
But blood, knives and violence is aaaaaaall good.
January 4, 2010 at 4:44 pm
#7 DeeBauchery : Or picking up your kid at daycare…
January 4, 2010 at 4:45 pm
#7 DeeBauchery :
This would be the perfect accessories for picking someone up at the airport.
…
Ha, this made me lol!
January 4, 2010 at 4:48 pm
I’m buying this and wearing it the next time I get called for jury duty…
January 4, 2010 at 4:53 pm
I won’t get personal with my critique. I’ll just say that this handbag has a low mind, an utter lack of propriety and a questionable idea of what accessories a woman should carry when she’s out and about among strangers.
January 4, 2010 at 4:57 pm
There needs to be a complimenting pair of oversized sunglasses with “He hits me because he loves me” written on the lenses.
January 4, 2010 at 4:59 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
January 4, 2010 at 5:02 pm
dr. phil would have a field day in this little shop of horrors….
January 4, 2010 at 5:05 pm
Perfect for the rockabilly stalker!
January 4, 2010 at 5:06 pm
I agree. I would probably bitch slap the person carrying that bag
January 4, 2010 at 5:08 pm
she must have killed the spider.
January 4, 2010 at 5:09 pm
There seems to be a spider theme going today.
January 4, 2010 at 5:15 pm
#17 martini :
“I’m buying this and wearing it the next time I get called for jury duty…”
Damn it! I’ve got jury duty tomorrow. No time to get it by then.
January 4, 2010 at 5:18 pm
Alright, any grappling I’ve been doing with whether it’s karmically questionable to publicly poke fun at some of these Etsy creations has been settled with this dandy little number. I used to think everyone should have the opportunity to express themselves creatively, but possibly I was wrong, case in point the murder purse, and I’d include bodiless pants guy and his freddie krueger fetish-wear since I’m pretty sure he’s trouble.
January 4, 2010 at 5:22 pm
That is one of the most ignorant and repulsive sentiments imaginable. This “purse” gives goth a bad name.
January 4, 2010 at 5:23 pm
So much fail, even Jesus facepalmed!
http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/b/ba/Sadjesus.png
January 4, 2010 at 5:28 pm
http://www.loveisfan.com/page/2
now #63 makes sense.
January 4, 2010 at 5:29 pm
I wonder how much the handbag was worth before she painted it. Fake leopard fur on the inside? That is so rockabilly-tacky-cool I’d be doing backflips if I found it in an antique shop or thrift store.
January 4, 2010 at 5:29 pm
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=23953851
WTF???
January 4, 2010 at 5:30 pm
This may not be the particular purse a young lady should carry on a first date, or say when meeting his parents. Unless your date is a member of either the Adams or Manson family.
January 4, 2010 at 5:31 pm
Never crust the living!
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=29548633
January 4, 2010 at 5:34 pm
since when is a crappy toy knife you get from the dollar store vintage??
January 4, 2010 at 5:45 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
January 4, 2010 at 5:49 pm
“#19 bloodorange :
There needs to be a complimenting pair of oversized sunglasses with “He hits me because he loves me” written on the lenses.”
i would wear those. but i still wouldnt carry this purse.
“#28 dustbunny :
…This “purse” gives goth a bad name.”
exactly. i have never known a goth who would use this, except maybe a 13 year old baby bat who just tore her first pair of fishnets.
January 4, 2010 at 5:52 pm
It would be an ideal bag to carry to your appointment with your Insurance Agent, in order to take out a policy on your new beloved.
January 4, 2010 at 5:59 pm
Hey #31, CreepyLittleGirl, I wonder if you could scrape all the paint off?!? THAT would be cool!
January 4, 2010 at 6:02 pm
Ooo, this is DARLING! Perfect for a night at the opera… say, ‘Pagliacci’?
No? How about the theater? ‘Othello’ is playing. Wait, he strangled her. Maybe this seller could make a bloodspattered scarf that says ‘I love you to death’.
January 4, 2010 at 7:24 pm
#32 PussDaddy : Or Kevorkian…
January 4, 2010 at 7:29 pm
Imagine your friend showing up with that at the teaparty. “Uhhh yeah, it’s…. nice!”
January 4, 2010 at 8:05 pm
If murder says “love” does bitch-slapping or pistol whipping mean “I like you?”
Sheesh…how does one say hello? With a pinch or a backhand?
January 4, 2010 at 8:14 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
January 4, 2010 at 8:17 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
January 4, 2010 at 8:21 pm
these would make tupac proud…
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=37048058
January 4, 2010 at 8:46 pm
No no, you guys. The bag clearly says “Murcler is born of love”. Now I may not know what murcler is, and I may not be sure why a plastic switchblade would be a toy, but clearly there is something deeply and subtly meaningful about this piece.
If it’s not murcler it’s not love.
January 4, 2010 at 8:48 pm
To what affair do I bring my vintage clutch with plastic switchblade attached?
And what do I wear?
You know, I mean, because this is so *classy!*
*clutches pearls*
January 4, 2010 at 8:53 pm
Any girl that carries around a bag like this is not the kind of girl you take home to meet mother.
January 4, 2010 at 8:54 pm
Shouldn’t that be “borne”? (And doesn’t it look like it says “murcler”?)
@#8: A spiderweb tattoo on the elbow supposedly means that you’ve killed someone.
January 4, 2010 at 8:59 pm
I think I need to point out a couple things to the dark sonovabitch that thought this morbid piece of whimsicle fuckery up.
The first thing is, tacking a plastic knife to a cheap leather handbag doesn’t give anything a nicer feel. It’s like shopping for birthday presents at a funeral home.
Second of all, the whole murder is love motif isn’t gothic, it’s FUCKING EMO.
Finally, if this doesn’t scream ‘I beat a hooker to death in a gas station bathroom’ I don’t know what does.
January 4, 2010 at 9:12 pm
you know who makes this stuff? 17 year-old emo and or goth girls who are actually fairly artistically inclined and politically knowledgeable but who are secretly wishing they were that bella broad from the twilight series and who have actually never had to confront the reality of being victimized in any way.
that’s my most intuitive hypothesis, anyway. aside from that, this is some tacky shit.
January 4, 2010 at 9:31 pm
This clutch would be perfect for Squeaky Fromme, if the Manson Family reunion is a formal affair.
January 4, 2010 at 11:17 pm
Isn’t “vintage plastic” an oxymoron?
January 4, 2010 at 11:29 pm
I almost feel sorry for the idiot who buys this, because I’m sure that someone they come across will kick their ass when they see it.
And I’m betting they won’t understand why.
January 5, 2010 at 12:36 am
Materials used- “stabby feelings”
Probably figured nobody looks for shit right in front of them and that is how the idea of gluing the murder weapon to a purse was born.
Next problem- now how the fuck do I get rid of it where nobody would ever look- ETSY is clearly the place to do that.
January 5, 2010 at 12:38 am
If OJ is already in jail how will he ever kick this fucker’s door down to get his handbag back?
January 5, 2010 at 4:49 am
#51: nah, emo kids wanna cut themselves, not others
January 5, 2010 at 6:34 am
I can’t even touch this one. Holy cow.
January 5, 2010 at 6:39 am
Try getting through airport security with that purse!
January 5, 2010 at 8:56 am
With the handbag and this sold listing as samples:
http://www.etsy.com/view_transaction.php?transaction_id=23655538
I’m thinking this chick has trouble getting dates.
January 5, 2010 at 8:58 am
Whoever bought this:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=14526098
Would probably love this purse. Kind of the same theme don’t you think?
January 5, 2010 at 9:01 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
January 5, 2010 at 9:05 am
Seriously? What would possess a person paint this? I nearly convo’d the seller of my displeasure. Since I believe very strongly in freedom of speech, even for stupidity, I restrained myself. #$%^&*$%&+@
January 5, 2010 at 9:07 am
What’s really wrong with this purse is not that it gives murder a “nicer feel” but that it’s really fucking ugly. April – you knock her teeth out, I’ll kick her in the shins and we’ll call it a day. Good times.
January 5, 2010 at 9:51 am
When passive-aggression meets assertiveness training.
January 5, 2010 at 10:28 am
You could open up a whole Regretsy shop with the items they purchased in their Feedback From Sellers list.
January 5, 2010 at 10:30 am
#49 said that “Any girl that carries around a bag like this is not the kind of girl you take home to meet mother.”
Unless, of course, you’re trying to get rid of mother and collect your inheritance.
January 5, 2010 at 10:35 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
January 5, 2010 at 10:40 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
January 5, 2010 at 10:57 am
#63 How do you change the freaky avatar?
Whimsical purses? Yes. Sociopathic purses? Not so much.
January 5, 2010 at 12:49 pm
@#69 Nitebyrd: sign up @ gravatar.com, make sure you use same e-mail address for gravatar and regretsy.
January 5, 2010 at 1:24 pm
I can visualize some deranged woman scurrying down the street, purse clenched in her hand , muttering “redrum, redrum”
January 5, 2010 at 3:16 pm
What an idiot.
I do know someone who was murdered and, no its not born of love, it was a random stupid attack in the street one new years eve. He had just said “Happy New year” to a person passing, and the guy decided to kill him for it.
January 5, 2010 at 4:11 pm
I went ahead and sent a message to this seller. I tried to walk that fine line between insanely outraged and politely informative… I have known two people who were murdered and no, there was no love involved. I’m all for expressing yourself with your little Goth/Emo thing or whatever, but must you mock the dead and their survivors?
January 5, 2010 at 11:44 pm
“Murder is born of love”
…..
Or of fucking sociopathic sadism, you dumb shit!
January 6, 2010 at 5:44 am
#72 – Thank you, Skully!
January 6, 2010 at 9:54 am
…really? This is obviously someone who hasn’t watched much truTV or thinks much about the effects of crimes…the only person I can imagine using this thing is some goth/deathrocker/horror punk wannabe
January 6, 2010 at 10:16 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
January 7, 2010 at 7:39 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
January 7, 2010 at 11:50 am
And this is JUST a damn website for God’s sake.
January 8, 2010 at 11:12 am
I’d probably give a violent responce too. If I wasn’t first confused as to who “Mucler” was.
January 8, 2010 at 11:13 am
I mean “Murcler”
January 10, 2010 at 2:26 pm
One of my sisters was murdered, and hell ya, I would cause bodily damage to the sick fuck who would wear this piece of shit. Love? I don’t think so.
January 16, 2010 at 11:06 am
This is perfect downsize prevention for the office! Give those little clickies something to think about!
February 2, 2010 at 1:01 pm
What vile twattle.Lock this shit down and flush.