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Baste Man

Posted by Helen Killer

46 comments

I think every bride wants to be photographed in a bib at her reception. It’s like a fairy tale; the Princess and the Baby Back Ribs. Then at the end of the night, you can gather your bridesmaids around and throw a bucket of cole slaw.

Filed in Accessories 46 comments

46 Comments

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Dec 31, 2009
1:37 pm

#1 Lexiii :

Is it vomit resistant?

Rate this comment: +17

Dec 31, 2009
1:38 pm

#2 moi :

Satin looking fabric? clas-sy!

Rate this comment: +27

Dec 31, 2009
1:38 pm

#3 lyontamer :

It’s ugly, but practical. I wouldn’t want to get buffalo wing sauce on my good polyester/acetate wedding gown.

Rate this comment: +74

Dec 31, 2009
1:38 pm

#4 Monstrosa :

Can I get the “Say What” guy printed on it in time for my renewal of vows at Chuckie Cheese?

Rate this comment: +68

Dec 31, 2009
1:38 pm

#5 curlytopnola :

i love the way this sterling white bib sets off the yellow-ocity, thanks to time and cigarette smoke, of memaw’s wedding gown circa 1927.
seriously. if you’re not old enough to enjoy your reception dinner and NOT ruin your dress/tux, perhaps there are some age of consent laws that need to come into question.

Rate this comment: +69

Dec 31, 2009
1:38 pm

#6 greenfuzz :

I seriously could not tell at first if the adult in this meant, “Adult” like this was part of some weird role playing sex game

Rate this comment: +56

Dec 31, 2009
1:40 pm

#7 everydaymama1 :

Does it come with satin-like diapers? That way the bride or groom never have to leave the party to go potty!

Rate this comment: +30

Dec 31, 2009
1:41 pm

#8 NinjaGato :

I would love to pass this on to my little sister with the BBQ sauce stain from my wedding

Rate this comment: +25

Dec 31, 2009
1:41 pm

#9 greenfuzz :

Passing on the stained bib as “something old” seems incredibly vile. Plus the something old is supposed to be worn when you are getting married, not put on at the reception when you are eating.

Rate this comment: +24

Dec 31, 2009
1:41 pm

#10 greenfuzz :

that wasn’t meant as a response to #8, I didn’t see your post when I wrote #9

Rate this comment: 0

Dec 31, 2009
1:42 pm

#11 Wilma Fingerdoo :

Does it come with a mallet and a bucket of all you can eat crabs?

It doesn’t stand out at all against the cream lace wedding gown….

Rate this comment: +25

Dec 31, 2009
1:44 pm

#12 moi :

I’d love to see this turn up on the show “Redneck Wedding”!

Rate this comment: +23

Dec 31, 2009
1:46 pm

#13 quizzicalpussy :

Now I know what to wear with my satin-looking material assless chaps!

Rate this comment: +25

Dec 31, 2009
1:47 pm

#14 razberries :

i suppose it could be “upcycled” into a slutty-esque halter..i’m no seamstress, but slap on a strap on each side at the bottom and you then have “something new”- if we’re keeping with the wedding theme thing…

Rate this comment: +16

Dec 31, 2009
1:49 pm

#15 razberries :

curlytopnola…”memaw’s wedding gown circa 1927″
ha! love it.

Rate this comment: +9

Dec 31, 2009
1:50 pm

#16 Patty has been abuducted by an alien :

I’m going to avoid mentioning how tacky this is because you all with the greater senses of humor will do a better job at it.

That said…

This wouldn’t have helped at my wedding when my spouse and I decided to do the “mature” thing and have a cake fight.

We needed a tarp. Too bad they didn’t sell “satin-like” tarps 23 years ago.

Rate this comment: +17

Dec 31, 2009
1:50 pm

#17 palJacky :

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

Rate this comment: -13

Dec 31, 2009
1:51 pm

#18 Stretch65 :

for an Adult wedding – Depends sold sepearately

Rate this comment: +10

Dec 31, 2009
1:54 pm

#19 fluffysue :

Nice, this will work well for my wedding at Famous Daves, where the napkins are actually a roll of paper towels at the table.

Rate this comment: +18

Dec 31, 2009
1:56 pm

#20 BettyMachete :

Wedding dress $1500, reception $15,000, all your pictures taken with a $15 bib- worth every penny.

Rate this comment: +32

Dec 31, 2009
1:58 pm

#21 ThisJustMakesMeSad :

How old is this bride that she needs to wear a bib? Does she also need to put her teeth in a jar every night?

Rate this comment: +24

Dec 31, 2009
1:59 pm

#22 HelenaHandbasket :

It’s a fancy-schmancy dickie.

Rate this comment: +16

Dec 31, 2009
2:02 pm

#23 leftfoot :

They’d be better off selling it as a hooker top than a bib.

Rate this comment: +21

Dec 31, 2009
2:04 pm

#24 popodog :

#1 Lexii: “Is it vomit resistant?”

Nope. Vomit-inducing.

Rate this comment: +15

Dec 31, 2009
2:05 pm

#25 DeeBauchery :

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

Rate this comment: -15

Dec 31, 2009
2:07 pm

#26 Saraf :

found this in the ’sold’ section of this shop

nothing says “patriotism” like letting your LIL ONE spit up all over the Marine Corps emblem and/or some 9/11 symbolism. classy.

http://www.etsy.com/view_transaction.php?transaction_id=15229038

Rate this comment: +14

Dec 31, 2009
2:12 pm

#27 Moons in Leo :

Absolutely perfect for the wedding reception buffet trough.

Rate this comment: +7

Dec 31, 2009
2:34 pm

#28 Recovering Crack Baby :

I can honestly say that in the one trillion weddings I have attended. Never saw a need for one of these. I need to start hangin with a different crowd.

Rate this comment: +1

Dec 31, 2009
2:35 pm

#29 Recovering Crack Baby :

sososophie

“Where everything we do is soso.”
Hey…I didn’t name it- sophie did.

Rate this comment: +7

Dec 31, 2009
3:10 pm

#30 tejasmom :

I’m totally non-plussed. Why would anyone wear a bib at their wedding?? Your comments are all priceless just like this bib.

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 31, 2009
3:34 pm

#31 Not Me :

I’ll admit.
I asked for a bib for my wedding dinner.

But I’m known far and wide for dropping food on myself. I was not about to stain the living crap out of my expensive dress, so the reception hall had a funny plastic lobster-style bib that said Bride on it.

All that said… who the hell would want to pass on or recieve a used bib?!

Rate this comment: +10

Dec 31, 2009
3:57 pm

#32 whimsey :

Gee, I should get in on the soiled diaper/baby shower market before this takes off!

Rate this comment: +6

Dec 31, 2009
4:05 pm

#33 DucksNew :

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

Rate this comment: -5

Dec 31, 2009
4:24 pm

#34 Bemused :

Haven’t we taken a wrong turn somewhere down this road? We have left Luxe Leggings and their credibility problem and the stained jeans behind and arrived at an item designed to prevent stains. This doesn’t feel right, HK.

Rate this comment: +8

Dec 31, 2009
4:39 pm

#35 Thistle :

perhaps its for the wedding night…..ow! not in the eye, not in the eye!

Rate this comment: +12

Dec 31, 2009
5:23 pm

#36 palJacky :

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

Rate this comment: -25

Dec 31, 2009
5:45 pm

#37 michelleames :

I agree…sounds like it’s for someone who needs adult bridal diapers too.

I guess it’s for those brides who really dig into their reception dinner.

I demurely tucked a napkin into my neckline instead. Silly me!

Rate this comment: +1

Dec 31, 2009
11:03 pm

#38 envy :

after reading the item description: my sister got married, she & her groom danced down the aisle to ZZTop’s “sharp dressed man” (they both watch pro wrestling & that was the Fantastic’s theme song…) anyway, in spite of that, my sister the Actuarial accountant & her husband, the Astronomy Prof, did NOT feel the need to smear cake on each other like participants on the Jerry Springer show.

I guess we can take comfort in that it’s ONLY $15.00, although someone really could have adjusted…

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 31, 2009
11:05 pm

#39 envy :

the tension on their sewing machine.

Seriously, the seams are all bunchy, they shouldn’t be. And for fuck’s sake: iron the god damned thing if it’s supposed to be worn at a wedding.
Where’s the Craftsmanship?

Rate this comment: +17

Jan 1, 2010
7:37 am

#40 lemon floor wax :

My sister’s wedding reception was catered by a local BBQ place. It was fantastic food but ribs are messy…lucky for my sister, they had these amazing devices called NAPKINS that she was able to use to protect her dress. Cotton protects better than “satin like” material, anyway.

Rate this comment: +10

Jan 1, 2010
10:10 am

#41 strawberrylumps :

This is perfect for those wedding receptions up to the Golden Corral in Bumfuck, Alabama.

Rate this comment: +10

Jan 2, 2010
10:02 am

#42 Night Cowl :

You know, great concept, execution….not so much.

Where is the creativity? Where is the craftsmanship?

You could really make something cute and useful if you used your imagination a little.

Here is what I would do. You know those tshirts that make you look like you have an hourglass figure wearing a bikini? Well, I’d make a flesh colored cleavage, use some lace and pearls and sequins and fancy it up, and then suggest the bride could use it as an apron after the wedding.

Rate this comment: +1

Jan 2, 2010
10:03 am

#43 Night Cowl :

Or put an owl on it, wearing a mustache. That, at least, would appeal to a certain sect of Etsy.

Rate this comment: +11

Jan 3, 2010
3:21 pm

#44 kristinc :

“someone really could have adjusted… the tension on their sewing machine. Seriously, the seams are all bunchy, they shouldn’t be.”

Lord, yes. Just because you CAN run a sewing machine doesn’t mean you SHOULD.

Rate this comment: +1

Jan 4, 2010
6:17 am

#45 kitty :

I think she misspelled a word in her description… i don’t think she meant “give it to another bride as something OLD”. I think she meant “give to another bride as something ODD.”

Rate this comment: 0

Jan 4, 2010
4:12 pm

#46 clover :

kitty, I think you’re onto something there. In fact, she could also be giving this soiled bib to her as “something MOLD.”

Rate this comment: 0