Wolf Shitzer
Wait – the tail is an actual pocket? Well that changes everything! I wasn’t going to spend $80 to look like a stupid hipster dipshit, but I need a pocket to keep my fingerless gloves in.
PROTIP: LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD DOES NOT HAVE A FOX IN IT
December 30, 2009 at 1:31 pm
is that a fox on your crotch or are you just happy to rip me off for $80?
December 30, 2009 at 1:35 pm
Oh Jeyzuz that’s ugly.
And I’m even a hipster dipshit.
If there’s Jeffree Star involved, it’s 95% likely to be ugly bullshit.
December 30, 2009 at 1:35 pm
If it doesn’t come with the plastic bag to put over my head I’m not buying it.
December 30, 2009 at 1:37 pm
Hah. #1, I’m glad I’m not the only one that noticed the placement of the fox head. Notice the nice “chalice” shape… I will now call this little number the Fox Box Skirt.
December 30, 2009 at 1:38 pm
Nothing says “couture” like an elastic waistband.
December 30, 2009 at 1:38 pm
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December 30, 2009 at 1:41 pm
Fox or faux fox.
If that’s a wolf, it’s rabid and foaming.
December 30, 2009 at 1:42 pm
Wolf? Where? I only see a terrified red fox on this abomination of an outfit.
December 30, 2009 at 1:43 pm
Is that a really creepy mannequin, or just a girl with a plastic face?
December 30, 2009 at 1:45 pm
What skirt? I can’t get past the terrifying model whose heart-shaped lips look like they’re puckered up to give the kiss of death! Her head looks like a manequin but her body looks real.((quiver)) Hold me.
December 30, 2009 at 1:46 pm
Trying to understand why the PayPal address is in the listing. I mean, that’s kind of already set up when you choose it as a payment method. Are we being encouraged to send her random payments without buying anything? Like a donation to genius?
December 30, 2009 at 1:46 pm
also for sale: hooter dress to smash your hooters.
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=35956276
more to the point, I wonder where one might purchase the anal beads hairpiece on the model?
December 30, 2009 at 1:46 pm
Good question #9 killerpoodle.
I thought it was a mannequin, but now that you mention it, her arms look awfully real.
Eww.
December 30, 2009 at 1:48 pm
I cannot be the only person who is totally creeped out by the face of the person who is modeling this “skirt”? I kept hoping it was a mannequin, but it looks like it is indeed human.
And I’m absolutely amazed that this shirt is so unflattering that it actually makes a borderline anorexic look fat.
December 30, 2009 at 1:48 pm
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December 30, 2009 at 1:49 pm
This is absolutely terrifying!!! http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=37267142
Runs and cowers in corner…
December 30, 2009 at 1:50 pm
Why is it called the ‘Big Bad Wolf Bubble Skirt’ when it really has a fox on it??
I mean, even if you go out wearing the red cape and carrying a basket, you’ll still just look like a confused idiot.
December 30, 2009 at 1:50 pm
WTF?? http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=35978688
December 30, 2009 at 1:51 pm
You know the item is crap when even the womannequin looks embarassed
December 30, 2009 at 1:54 pm
If this shop is ‘couture’ in New York, I thank Bob that I live in Washington.
December 30, 2009 at 1:55 pm
You know, the more I look at the clothes and models, the more I think that these are actually a bunch of confused circus performers.
December 30, 2009 at 1:56 pm
All her stuff is listed as S/M… Where in the hell are you supposed to put a medium ass in any of these?
December 30, 2009 at 1:57 pm
Look at the shocking shipping price to ‘Everywhere else’…………………. for $30.00 I want it delivered in person!
December 30, 2009 at 1:57 pm
18: she must go through a lot of makeup putting it all over her forehead.
no words foul enough exist in any language known to mankind to describe the utter rust and misery of these clothes.
December 30, 2009 at 1:58 pm
I know I’m “old” (okay, I’m 40), but I read stories to my kids when they were young.
It’s “Little Red RIDING HOOD”, not “Little Red Weird Wolf”.
And she wasn’t red, her cloak was red. Not the wolf, the cloak with a hood, hence the name “Red Riding Hood”.
I also thought a “bubble skirt” meant it had some kind of weird hem at the bottom that made it poof out.
But I did say I was old, so maybe my mind is going.
December 30, 2009 at 2:01 pm
This puts on my lollerskates:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=36231576
Notice the designer brags about the dress being in Elle. Except that it’s clear Elle is praising, not the dress, but the yellow clutch being forced to hang out with the dress.
December 30, 2009 at 2:09 pm
#23 Patty has been abuducted by an alien :
It is indeed not a bubble skirt, but a badly done waistband. And the hem is a bit clumsy too. Perhaps attaching it to balloons and letting it float away (with a note in the tail pocket) would be a fun kid’s project.
December 30, 2009 at 2:09 pm
I love that the designer calls everything in her shop SUPER RARE! Since she makes them, doesn’t she decide how rare they are? Or is someone else making them too, just not very many?
December 30, 2009 at 2:10 pm
And as for the new avatars, I can’t figure out how to choose my own. Anyone wanna tell me how? I wanted one before and was too dumb to figure it out, but now I’m extra motivated to get a new one.
December 30, 2009 at 2:12 pm
My one of a kind snot rockets are “SUPER RARE” as well. However, I’m not sure I can charge $80 a pop for them on etsy. I’m certainly going to try, though.
December 30, 2009 at 2:17 pm
The fox mouth matches the mannequin mouth in its heart-y goodness. They are trying to work a subliminal angle here. I think?
I think the fox may have a place in the regrettable Santa category.
December 30, 2009 at 2:22 pm
#25 Monstrosa: How would you like to be standing outside and see THAT float into your yard? *eeek!*
#27 CreepyLittleGirl: The rest of us did ours through the gravatar website. You just upload a photo and choose it and such. Pretty easy to do (hey, I did it and I’m old!)
http://en.gravatar.com/
December 30, 2009 at 2:22 pm
She says Katie Perry is a big fan. I think Bjork might be a better audience.
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=26737966
December 30, 2009 at 2:29 pm
Look at that hem. There’s nothing “bubble” about it.
December 30, 2009 at 2:30 pm
Obviously all the mistakes are ‘ironic’ so that the hipsters won’t be embarrassed to wear it. Sure, honey. And if this is New York Couture I’m fucking Mayor Bloomberg.
December 30, 2009 at 2:31 pm
THIS is a bubble skirt.
http://www.v.80spurple.com/shop/80spurple/images/products/origin/hellz-bellz/hlb_92hb7001_pnk-2.jpg
December 30, 2009 at 2:33 pm
Model/mannequiun appears to be sucking on a ping pong ball with makeup done by a 4 year old.
I guess “the tail is an actual pocket” would be great if your hand were a lobster claw.
I can’t decide what’s scarier- model or outfit. Methinks model.
December 30, 2009 at 2:46 pm
Oh my god.. OH MY GOD. You guys made me do a double-take on what I was certain was a mannequin… AND IT’S A WOMAN! -runs off screaming-
December 30, 2009 at 2:49 pm
I think that big question is…
is there a wicker picnic basket shortage?
December 30, 2009 at 2:53 pm
this skirt, if you can believe it, is part of people’s “stylewatch” gift guide. A featured fashion cureated list picked by style “professionals”! http://www.etsy.com/gift-guides/people-stylewatch-s-picks/226
December 30, 2009 at 2:53 pm
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December 30, 2009 at 2:54 pm
Wow. As seen on MTV. Jersey Shore?
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=36087158
December 30, 2009 at 3:02 pm
#42 Wilma Fingerdoo :
Wow. As seen on MTV. Jersey Shore?
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=36087158
…..
The funny thing is that Kate Perry got on
the Worth Dressed list in that panda dress!
December 30, 2009 at 3:04 pm
I know! I guess any press is good press? She even put it on the worst dress review as part of her post!
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=36087158
December 30, 2009 at 3:04 pm
Ha. Thanks, Patty.
December 30, 2009 at 3:04 pm
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December 30, 2009 at 3:16 pm
actually this might be a good alternative.
Plushy costumes get so hot during those orgies.
December 30, 2009 at 3:17 pm
oh, this shit is hot in Bushwick…oops, I mean “East” Williamsburg.
December 30, 2009 at 3:32 pm
EAT A SANDWICH
December 30, 2009 at 3:48 pm
#46: When I clicked refresh, your new avatar appeared. Little blonde girl.
December 30, 2009 at 3:48 pm
49 comments and nobody has succumbed to it… apologies in advance…
the wolf, or fox, is clearly a cunning linguist.
December 30, 2009 at 3:54 pm
is it horrible? I think it would be cute on a little girl, but I’m a sucker for anything with an animal on it, except that deer newspaper jacket.
December 30, 2009 at 3:58 pm
Haute couture (French for “high sewing” or “high dressmaking”; pronounced [oːt kutyʁ]) refers to the creation of exclusive custom-fitted clothing. Haute couture is made to order for a specific customer, and it is usually made from high-quality, expensive fabric and sewn with extreme attention to detail and finish, often using time-consuming, hand-executed techniques. Couture is a common abbreviation of Haute Couture, which refers to the same thing in spirit[1].
December 30, 2009 at 4:01 pm
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=37563144
hahahahahahaaa!!!!
December 30, 2009 at 5:01 pm
#42 Wilma Fingerdoo :
Wow. As seen on MTV. Jersey Shore?
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=36087158
_________
Wilma, I totally agree with you, your comment made me laugh so hard. I couldn’t believe it myself, so I looked it up…
…and guess what? You won’t freakin’ believe this (I didn’t until I read the article): http://www.theinsider.com/news/1002811_Katy_Perry_s_FNMTV_Presh_Panda_Dress
December 30, 2009 at 5:24 pm
Few people can wrap themselves in faux animals and not look like a total idiots. Just because Björk does it…
December 30, 2009 at 5:28 pm
Okay, so here we have room for very good lesson in “getting over yourself”.
Put this skirt on a regularish cute model girl. It might not be to everyone’s taste, but it would just be a possibly cute skirt with a fox on it.
But add an alarmingly skinny model with unflattering, and perplexing make-up and styling, and the whole thing goes directly to pot. And not the good pot: terrible, terrible, skunky hipster freak couture kife.
I like strange. I don’t like fucking…
December 30, 2009 at 5:36 pm
I quite like the cute fox skirt. But teaming it with a fetish-PVC hood? And the unhuman makeup? And calling it Red Riding Hood? Unfortunate genre mash here.
December 30, 2009 at 5:47 pm
Somebody give Red a sandwich, Stat.
December 30, 2009 at 5:55 pm
I can’t get past the real model that looks like an anorexic mannequin. Yeah, everybody will be huffing and puffing when they see you in it………because they are hyperventilating from laughter!
December 30, 2009 at 6:11 pm
I was positive that was a mannequin until I noticed that one of her boobs was about 4 inches higher than the other.
And, just for the record, the wolf in the 3 little pigs story was the one that did all the huffing and puffing. It’s hard work trying to blow down those houses.
However, it’s probably safe to say that there is some degree of huffing and, maybe even some puffing, going on here. I just don’t think the wolf is the one doing it.
December 30, 2009 at 6:26 pm
It took me a while to get past the boob-oppressing, UnflatterUltra500 Sparklebra she had on, but then I had to call over the spouse — he read the title and asked ‘So why the hell is there a fox on it?’ Then he noticed her face, and when I said it wasn’t a mannequin he made a frightened noise and backed away.
December 30, 2009 at 6:36 pm
Where do you get the plastic hood,so no one thinks you are wearing a badly sewn apron?
December 30, 2009 at 7:13 pm
SUPER RARE! is going to be my new response to everything. “How ya doin’?” “SUPER RARE!” “Have you seen my shoes?” “SUPER RARE!” “How do you want your steak?” “SUPER RARE!” I can almost picture the Say What! guy yelling it…
December 30, 2009 at 8:53 pm
Okay, granted it’s horribly made, it’s mis-labeled, and it’s donned by someone more anorexic than Lindsey on a binge. Here’s what I’m puzzling over: the stunning latex hooded capelet and super-wide elastic band waisted bustier aren’t included, so WHAT in my closet (or any) would “go” with this?
December 30, 2009 at 9:09 pm
“…when I said it wasn’t a mannequin he made a frightened noise and backed away”
Haha! When I first saw this, I was certain it was a plastic doll. Looking closer, there’s something decidedly “bodysnatchers” about that face.
December 30, 2009 at 9:25 pm
Aw, the first item on here I had favorited before it was on Regretsy. I knew the day would come.
December 30, 2009 at 9:32 pm
ok this shop has some scary stuff…thing is the models may even be more freaky than the actual items…what is up with the krunk makeup?
December 30, 2009 at 10:18 pm
Hey I would totally dress in these clothes.. if I was six. And skinny. And it was Halloween.
December 30, 2009 at 10:23 pm
is that a mannequin head on a real body? her boobs look real.
December 30, 2009 at 11:32 pm
The red pocket-tailed wolf, (classified by the IUCN as “super rare”), has been hunted to the point of extinction for its fur, which is widely used by hipster dipshit designers to decorate skirts for pasty anorexic models.
December 31, 2009 at 6:13 am
Maybe the skirt looks weird because it is a size s/m worn by a size anorexic?
Maybe it would look weird on a regular sized person, too.
I suspect the latter.
December 31, 2009 at 6:37 am
wow, that whole store was a treat. thanks helen.
*scratches out eyeballs*
December 31, 2009 at 9:45 am
I now sit in my Brooklyn apt. listening to Santogold, drinking PBR 40′s & chain smoking American Spirits, while browsing regretsy on my macbookpro. The fact that I wouldn’t wear ANY of this shit makes me feel like I should turn in my hipsterdouchebag badge somewhere.
It also says A LOT about your brand if you have Audrey Kitching modeling it.
December 31, 2009 at 7:36 pm
this seller is on the front page right now, with the mustache necklace. HK…are you showing favoritism?
January 1, 2010 at 11:25 pm
@ #12 waningestrogen :
you can e-mail me directly if you would like the hair pieces made to match your hair lol
January 2, 2010 at 1:35 pm
This is couture about as much as my kitchen trash is “garbaaaaage”.
Damn. It’s hard to type a fake snooty fronnnch accent.
January 3, 2010 at 11:53 am
hipster? really? come on now…
January 3, 2010 at 5:10 pm
This model is shockingly thin!**
**only because I live in LA. I am quite used to seeing 5 ft 10 inch tall girls that weigh 95 lbs, but only with bolt-on silicone DD cups and fish lips*
January 4, 2010 at 12:46 pm
What is wrong with this? I kinda like it. If only I can find a wolf costume for my other half to wear as he hits me from behind while moaning “Grandma what big teeth you have”. You guys have no imagination is what it is.
PussDaddy