That is just a waste of time and balls, I mean from a buyers perspective. If you’re recycling bowling balls and spiffing up you’re own garden then fine.
But ripping off shoppers? That’s some ballsy fuckery.
I’m confused…there’s one in stock, its photo is posted, yet you have to wait three weeks to drive to Brighton to pick it up. What else does the artist need to do?
This is perfect! I’ll be in Brighton, Michigan next week on business and I can pick mine up and…wait, you’re saying it won’t be done by then? Crap. But I really want something that will attract alot of attention!
One must wonder how quickly those coat hanger legs will rust in regular rain and snow. With lost legs, I guess she could be Catie the giant gumball…snake?
Day 1: Ow, stubbed my toe!
Day 2: Owee ow ow ow, stubbed my toe again!
Day 3: Goddamn, my fucking toe!
Day 4: Goddamn it to fucking hell!
Day 5: Jesus Christ, I’m crippled!
Day 6: Mind the crutch!
…and so on, and so forth.
from a physics standpoint, there is no conceivable way those wire/pipe cleaner legs could support catie’s bulky, bowling ball girth. even i were to suspend that reality just for the sake of *ahem* whimsy, if you’re gonna make me wait 3 weeks (and the flight to michigan), i may as well just go down to my local lanes and rook 9 bowling balls and do it myself. and maybe some shoes too, ya know, since i’m goin’.
Viewed from the front, it’s almost cute- like if your kid lined it up & took this photo, it would be kind of funny. But viewed from the side (as most of your neighbors would probably be doing)? It looks like a line of bowling balls.
…She’s got three different stores full of crap? Good lord.
#12 – catie’s gonna hatch out to be a tropical fruit colored Mothra. i don’t know she it comes w/the teensy little twin girls that sing or not. might be a deal breaker. then there’s the whole “taking over tokyo” thing and all…
Does it really need painting? Couldn’t someone just, say, find some pink, orange, and red bowling balls and stick on some ping pong eyes? Okay, I suppose you’d have to paint on a smile if you really wanted, but you could probably let your 3 year old do it for you for a nickel. A bargain, really.
Brighton? Really. I didn’t know anything like this could ever come from there. The most evil person I’ve ever known lives there. Maybe if it had fangs and scales I’d believe it.
OMG what’s going on with Catie’s right eye in picture 3, with the giant teacup?? It looks… upside down!!! Maybe she tried some herbs growing in that garden?
Just wait until the neighborhood gremlins see this…you’ll wake up a bowling ball tossed through each and every window! As if 9 bowling balls aren’t enough ammunition…
Brighton–A string of six “street bowling” incidents haven been traced to a “garden sculpture” owned by one Ms. Zelle. Police were forced to pursue the pranksters on foot after their patrol car collided with a bright orange bowling ball careening down Pine Street at high speed. When questioned, Ms. Zelle expressed disbelief that unsecured bowling balls on a steep hill could culminate in such a dangerous prank. All nine bowling balls have been impounded during the continuing investigation.
What the hell is the creative process behind this??? its multi colored balls in a row. Perhaps its how long it takes for the next batch of “Creativity” to get harvested.
He should just sell a do-it-yourself kit: For $5 you get 20 old wire hangers, 2 ping pong balls, a marker, Mapquest directions to the nearest bowling alley, and a lock picking set.
Recovering Crack Baby
December 10, 2009 at 7:12 pm
I can’t stop the AC/DC Big Balls song………. I want it to go away but ever since I saw this post it will randomly pop into my head. It’s not appropriate to laugh aloud in certain social situations either. I also vision grabbing the head out of a bowling bag, on league night when it is packed of course, and rolling it down the lane. Make it stop.
I just thought of something… can “Catie” roll? Get a crane to fling this baby down the alley, and there’s no way you’d get anything but a strike. Well, maybe a lawsuit.
These balls were used for bowling
In the alley where I work.
But I snuck them out the back door
‘Cause my boss is such a jerk.
I made a caterpillar
That weighs too much to ship.
So pick it up in Michigan
It’s not that bad a trip.
I’ve got big balls,
For sale big balls.
Pink and red balls,
And orange balls,
Bowling big balls.
To sell stolen balls,
I must have the biggest balls of them all!
So you are telling me that in 3 weeks time you are not able to look at the face of the caterpiller and realize that the face is completely distorted???
And who is going to come up to my garden with a bunch of bowling balls in it and say “aww, what a cute caterpiller you have”. They are going to say… “hey, when you are down with the outdoor bowling alley you must be putting in, you’ll have to invite us over!”
There’s something horribly wrong here. Catie has no mouth in pic 2, and it looks like her whole damn head is backwards in pics 3 and 4. It’s…unnerving.
The tea cup planters were for sale at WalMart this past Spring/Summer. Pretty cute and a steal at $20 when compared to this shop’s “whimsicle” prices.
Holy Shit! I live close enough to buy this and “pick it up.”
I also used to bowl. So, apparently the seller doesn’t want to ship me 64 lbs of children’s bowling balls?
C’mon, parcel post would only be $21.77; priority is $32.25… where as round trip would take me roughly 2 hours + 12 minutes at a distance of 56.07 miles, there by costing me 3 gallons of gas…
But the better question would be: why would I want bowling balls in my garden? This is as bad as fairies… and fairy nests…
Much too heavy to ship? Really? I’m pretty sure UPS will take anything under 200 pounds. More like “Nobody in their right mind would pay the $200 to ship this fuckery.”
December 10, 2009 at 1:53 pm
That is just a waste of time and balls, I mean from a buyers perspective. If you’re recycling bowling balls and spiffing up you’re own garden then fine.
But ripping off shoppers? That’s some ballsy fuckery.
December 10, 2009 at 1:55 pm
I’m confused…there’s one in stock, its photo is posted, yet you have to wait three weeks to drive to Brighton to pick it up. What else does the artist need to do?
December 10, 2009 at 1:56 pm
“Please allow 3 weeks for the creative process.”
What creative process? How hard is it to look at the picture and realign the balls?
Damn, s/he should sell the drugs that they are doing instead.
December 10, 2009 at 1:57 pm
This is perfect! I’ll be in Brighton, Michigan next week on business and I can pick mine up and…wait, you’re saying it won’t be done by then? Crap. But I really want something that will attract alot of attention!
December 10, 2009 at 2:02 pm
My bad…apparently there’s plenty more where this came from. Somewhere in Brighton there’s a bowling alley with fewer balls.
December 10, 2009 at 2:02 pm
One must wonder how quickly those coat hanger legs will rust in regular rain and snow. With lost legs, I guess she could be Catie the giant gumball…snake?
December 10, 2009 at 2:07 pm
Look through the rest of the shop. There’s a lot of whimsicle fuckery.
December 10, 2009 at 2:07 pm
She never should have given away the part about the bowling balls. Now everyone will be making them!
December 10, 2009 at 2:10 pm
Day 1: Ow, stubbed my toe!
Day 2: Owee ow ow ow, stubbed my toe again!
Day 3: Goddamn, my fucking toe!
Day 4: Goddamn it to fucking hell!
Day 5: Jesus Christ, I’m crippled!
Day 6: Mind the crutch!
…and so on, and so forth.
December 10, 2009 at 2:10 pm
from a physics standpoint, there is no conceivable way those wire/pipe cleaner legs could support catie’s bulky, bowling ball girth. even i were to suspend that reality just for the sake of *ahem* whimsy, if you’re gonna make me wait 3 weeks (and the flight to michigan), i may as well just go down to my local lanes and rook 9 bowling balls and do it myself. and maybe some shoes too, ya know, since i’m goin’.
December 10, 2009 at 2:16 pm
Guess it takes her and her common-law-husband three weekends of “borrowing” supplies from the Brighton Bowl to complete the project.
December 10, 2009 at 2:16 pm
I can’t help what wonder what the butterfly will look like after the big ass thing emerges from his cocoon
December 10, 2009 at 2:20 pm
Viewed from the front, it’s almost cute- like if your kid lined it up & took this photo, it would be kind of funny. But viewed from the side (as most of your neighbors would probably be doing)? It looks like a line of bowling balls.
…She’s got three different stores full of crap? Good lord.
December 10, 2009 at 2:25 pm
OK. Going to state the obvious: anal beads.
. . . I’d like to see this made with some croquet balls, but perhaps the scale wouldn’t be quite as intimidating.
December 10, 2009 at 2:31 pm
no obvious anal beads to me…. butt now that you mention it…. I see why you would want them scaled downa bit or a lotta bit.
December 10, 2009 at 2:33 pm
#12 – catie’s gonna hatch out to be a tropical fruit colored Mothra. i don’t know she it comes w/the teensy little twin girls that sing or not. might be a deal breaker. then there’s the whole “taking over tokyo” thing and all…
December 10, 2009 at 2:36 pm
I don’t know if she will have a whole band but I think the monster butterfly would love to sing
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KANI2dpXLw
December 10, 2009 at 2:39 pm
mmmm…I suddenly have this massive craving for an Everlasting Gobstopper!
December 10, 2009 at 2:42 pm
Please, for the love of gardening, draw some pupils in those eyes! It’s a little freaky without them.
December 10, 2009 at 2:44 pm
I want to draw some attention to my garden. Should I:
1.Order Crappy the Catepillar, wait three weeks, then make a 4,500 mile round trip to pick it up.
OR
2.Get me some Phoenix jeans and a Skully Claus sweater, drink a few pints of Guinness, and pass out on my front lawn.
December 10, 2009 at 2:46 pm
Skully- why just the front lawn- don’t you have a bush you could pass out in?
December 10, 2009 at 2:49 pm
#20 Skully – why choose between the two? drink some pints in your pants and sweater and pass out right next to Mr. Balls in Brighton’s front lawn.
December 10, 2009 at 2:52 pm
What the hell are those eyes and eyelashes made from? Someone needs to lay off the crack pipe.
December 10, 2009 at 2:53 pm
Does it really need painting? Couldn’t someone just, say, find some pink, orange, and red bowling balls and stick on some ping pong eyes? Okay, I suppose you’d have to paint on a smile if you really wanted, but you could probably let your 3 year old do it for you for a nickel. A bargain, really.
December 10, 2009 at 2:54 pm
Lots of talk about weight and physics, but the most obvious has been overlooked: THIS THING IS FUCKING UGLY
(But I would buy the giant teacup planter from pic 3. CUTE!)
December 10, 2009 at 2:57 pm
Brighton? Really. I didn’t know anything like this could ever come from there. The most evil person I’ve ever known lives there. Maybe if it had fangs and scales I’d believe it.
December 10, 2009 at 3:00 pm
Every week you’d have to trim around your balls, and that’s just too much work.
December 10, 2009 at 3:01 pm
Giant caterpillar, giant cup… And all the other whimsicle fuckery in her shop makes me wonder what the seller smokes on a daily basis!
December 10, 2009 at 3:02 pm
Oh god! And here come the ladybugs! http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=29326410
December 10, 2009 at 3:10 pm
At least the balls aren’t blue…
December 10, 2009 at 3:13 pm
By the looks of those eyelashes, Catie’s a drag queen.
December 10, 2009 at 3:37 pm
My GF’s friend lives in Brighton…and she’s nucking futs. I’ll ask her if she knows anyone with a drag caterpillar in their yard.
December 10, 2009 at 3:43 pm
Does anyone else wonder what her garden/house must look like with all that crap in it?
December 10, 2009 at 3:49 pm
Wow, totally inspired.
If I had to guess, I’d say that meth has made it to Brighton, Michigan.
December 10, 2009 at 3:49 pm
I don’t know whether to Lol or shake my head.
December 10, 2009 at 3:58 pm
OMG what’s going on with Catie’s right eye in picture 3, with the giant teacup?? It looks… upside down!!! Maybe she tried some herbs growing in that garden?
December 10, 2009 at 4:06 pm
“Creative process” translates to “steal more balls from the bowling alley.”
December 10, 2009 at 4:06 pm
By the looks of those eyelashes, Catie’s a drag queen.
No self-respecting drag queen would ever let her balls show like that. . .
December 10, 2009 at 4:15 pm
Just wait until the neighborhood gremlins see this…you’ll wake up a bowling ball tossed through each and every window! As if 9 bowling balls aren’t enough ammunition…
December 10, 2009 at 4:20 pm
I have found a gift for my daughter!
She’s got this phobia about caterpillars and butterflies. I think this will be just the thing to jump-start some “tough love” kind of therapy.
I see that the materials list doesn’t show that it was made with love. Well, dammit.
December 10, 2009 at 4:29 pm
Brighton–A string of six “street bowling” incidents haven been traced to a “garden sculpture” owned by one Ms. Zelle. Police were forced to pursue the pranksters on foot after their patrol car collided with a bright orange bowling ball careening down Pine Street at high speed. When questioned, Ms. Zelle expressed disbelief that unsecured bowling balls on a steep hill could culminate in such a dangerous prank. All nine bowling balls have been impounded during the continuing investigation.
December 10, 2009 at 4:43 pm
What the hell is the creative process behind this??? its multi colored balls in a row. Perhaps its how long it takes for the next batch of “Creativity” to get harvested.
December 10, 2009 at 4:44 pm
WTF? I still cannot believe this thing is for sale…
December 10, 2009 at 5:04 pm
He should just sell a do-it-yourself kit: For $5 you get 20 old wire hangers, 2 ping pong balls, a marker, Mapquest directions to the nearest bowling alley, and a lock picking set.
December 10, 2009 at 5:11 pm
This is a stroke of genius. The cops never look for meth in bowling balls. Plus, you’re doing all her heavy lifting.
December 10, 2009 at 5:24 pm
i can’t believe nobody else mentioned this yet…all i see is the “cootie” game!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/28358193@N07/3248359683/
December 10, 2009 at 5:27 pm
wait, why am I driving to Michigan for a load of bowling balls?
December 10, 2009 at 5:31 pm
I bet the reason it takes 3 weeks is because it will take her that long to steal enough bowling balls.
Having said that, I kind of like it…
December 10, 2009 at 5:38 pm
This is what happens when pink flamingo factories go out of business.
December 10, 2009 at 5:45 pm
#44 Skully : Way to think outside the bowling bag!
December 10, 2009 at 5:47 pm
I just laughed hysterically at #47. sighhhh
this is the Dude’s WORST nightmare…..or roofie trip.
December 10, 2009 at 5:59 pm
WEll, once again I think the damn thing is cute. Maybe I am worse off than I first thought and need to seek help.
December 10, 2009 at 6:23 pm
Bolt up your winders
There”’s big Bawll’s in town.
December 10, 2009 at 7:12 pm
I can’t stop the AC/DC Big Balls song………. I want it to go away but ever since I saw this post it will randomly pop into my head. It’s not appropriate to laugh aloud in certain social situations either. I also vision grabbing the head out of a bowling bag, on league night when it is packed of course, and rolling it down the lane. Make it stop.
December 10, 2009 at 8:12 pm
I just thought of something… can “Catie” roll? Get a crane to fling this baby down the alley, and there’s no way you’d get anything but a strike. Well, maybe a lawsuit.
December 10, 2009 at 8:19 pm
I have already assembled a catapult. I will not say why at this time nor any other time.
December 10, 2009 at 10:24 pm
@#54 RCB (LOL @ #56):
These balls were used for bowling
In the alley where I work.
But I snuck them out the back door
‘Cause my boss is such a jerk.
I made a caterpillar
That weighs too much to ship.
So pick it up in Michigan
It’s not that bad a trip.
I’ve got big balls,
For sale big balls.
Pink and red balls,
And orange balls,
Bowling big balls.
To sell stolen balls,
I must have the biggest balls of them all!
December 10, 2009 at 10:29 pm
LMFAO SKULLY………..SNORTING………..
December 10, 2009 at 10:30 pm
OMG- Tears……Tears..
December 11, 2009 at 12:03 am
Skully – you should be keeping all these bits of poetry somewhere, for your future book of Regretsy-inspired poetry.
December 11, 2009 at 5:13 am
So you are telling me that in 3 weeks time you are not able to look at the face of the caterpiller and realize that the face is completely distorted???
And who is going to come up to my garden with a bunch of bowling balls in it and say “aww, what a cute caterpiller you have”. They are going to say… “hey, when you are down with the outdoor bowling alley you must be putting in, you’ll have to invite us over!”
December 11, 2009 at 7:24 am
There’s something horribly wrong here. Catie has no mouth in pic 2, and it looks like her whole damn head is backwards in pics 3 and 4. It’s…unnerving.
The tea cup planters were for sale at WalMart this past Spring/Summer. Pretty cute and a steal at $20 when compared to this shop’s “whimsicle” prices.
December 11, 2009 at 9:18 am
Holy Shit! I live close enough to buy this and “pick it up.”
I also used to bowl. So, apparently the seller doesn’t want to ship me 64 lbs of children’s bowling balls?
C’mon, parcel post would only be $21.77; priority is $32.25… where as round trip would take me roughly 2 hours + 12 minutes at a distance of 56.07 miles, there by costing me 3 gallons of gas…
But the better question would be: why would I want bowling balls in my garden? This is as bad as fairies… and fairy nests…
December 11, 2009 at 10:42 am
#63 with all the figuring you have done it is just easier to admit that you………
Have an over-analyzing issue…..
December 11, 2009 at 10:53 am
can I say it?
you’ve really gotta have balls to put this on your front lawn…
December 11, 2009 at 11:51 am
I imagine the 3 week long creative process involves sneaking into local bowling alleys and stealing enough bowling balls to make this POS
December 11, 2009 at 2:46 pm
“Creative process?”- As an artist I’m insulted.
Plus…I already got a lot of junk in my yard.
I’ll pass, thank you.
December 11, 2009 at 3:39 pm
Renting a uhaul truck and driving to Michigan
December 11, 2009 at 4:07 pm
If one had the proper cannon, these could be air mailed.
December 14, 2009 at 10:21 pm
the 3 week creative process bit has me ROFLing…
February 11, 2012 at 4:38 pm
Much too heavy to ship? Really? I’m pretty sure UPS will take anything under 200 pounds. More like “Nobody in their right mind would pay the $200 to ship this fuckery.”