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Calamari, Full of Grace

Posted by Helen Killer

88 comments

Filed in Art, View it in a Room 88 comments

88 Comments

Add Comment

Dec 9, 2009
11:02 am

#1 rednails :

I like it!

Rate this comment: +9

Dec 9, 2009
11:04 am

#2 skeletaldropkick :

If church really looked like the one in the “view it in a room” I would be there every day… in waders…

Rate this comment: +46

Dec 9, 2009
11:06 am

#3 Skully :

Helen, how many Hail Mary’s do you have to say after posting that View in a Room? Hilarious!

Rate this comment: +43

Dec 9, 2009
11:09 am

#4 everydaymama1 :

Helen you ROCK! That view in a room is priceless! And so much intricate detailing in the church of Regretsy

Rate this comment: +22

Dec 9, 2009
11:11 am

#5 houstonruthie :

My favorite View It In A Room yet.

Rate this comment: +23

Dec 9, 2009
11:12 am

#6 vangoghbabe :

I’m converting…in the confessional, will the priest be able to smell you?? That would be a dead give away.
Helen, please, you have acquired a bad “habit”…

Rate this comment: +13

Dec 9, 2009
11:14 am

#7 Sushisimo :

Imagine Joseph’s expression when Mary gave birth to that. “Did you get knocked up in the Sea of Galilee?”

Rate this comment: +32

Dec 9, 2009
11:16 am

#8 chefann :

It’s a trap!

It’s nice to know that a former military man, er, squid, can turn to the church.

Rate this comment: +10

Dec 9, 2009
11:20 am

#9 DucksNew :

First seller says print is 6″ x 7″. Then it says “16 x nearly 20 inches”. I’m assuming the bigger size is from the original painting’s listing. And $20 for an inkjet printout? Bah!

Also they’re giving a special treat with the first 10 purchases…it scares me what it might be

Rate this comment: +18

Dec 9, 2009
11:23 am

#10 HermesGoddess :

FABULOUS!

Rate this comment: +2

Dec 9, 2009
11:25 am

#11 IscreamUscream :

Lil’ baby Cthulhu has inked his swaddling–again!?

Rate this comment: +33

Dec 9, 2009
11:27 am

#12 dmr :

fine INK JET print! They must have a gold-plated printer. INK JET print. aaaaaaaaaaaargh.

Rate this comment: +9

Dec 9, 2009
11:27 am

#13 thebakesale :

ahah I like it, too.
Is that Admiral Ackbar in the background of the View it in a Room? Class.

Rate this comment: +10

Dec 9, 2009
11:29 am

#14 curlytopnola :

perhaps the “special treat included for first 10 buyers!” is that it comes wrapped in yesterday’s newspaper.
weird, but true story!
i’d also like to know if i have to go to work on St. Cuttlefish day

Rate this comment: +19

Dec 9, 2009
11:31 am

#15 martini :

Holy mother of squid!

Rate this comment: +18

Dec 9, 2009
11:31 am

#16 theleewit711 :

I loooooooooooooove cephalopods!!! All of them! But if I had to pick a favorite the cuttle fish would be my favorite hands down.

Rate this comment: +15

Dec 9, 2009
11:32 am

#17 sar-sar :

Holy seafood fuck! View in a room is to die for! Genius, sheer genius!

Really, WTF? The virgin Mary & a cuttlefish? What are these people smoking and injecting into their veins?

Rate this comment: +10

Dec 9, 2009
11:35 am

#18 martini :

Ink-jet… Bwaahaha…

Rate this comment: +18

Dec 9, 2009
11:35 am

#19 sneakypink :

He does pet portraits, too! I wonder if he could paint my pet cuttlefish.

Rate this comment: +13

Dec 9, 2009
11:36 am

#20 turtlegirl76 :

Is the squid wearing a dunce cap? Or a wizard cap? :/

Rate this comment: +8

Dec 9, 2009
11:41 am

#21 CrimsonHoohah :

Looks like Poseidon had an illicit affair with Mary. Guess she’s more kinky then I gave her credit for.

Rate this comment: +20

Dec 9, 2009
11:43 am

#22 Skully :

@#18 TG: That might be a mitre.

Rate this comment: +6

Dec 9, 2009
11:45 am

#23 Skully :

That was for #20, sorry.

Rate this comment: +5

Dec 9, 2009
11:54 am

#24 Patty :

And then the baby cephlapod did grow to be an adult cephlaman. His rage grew as did his tentacles. And he went on terrorize Johnny Depp on the high seas for a movie and two sequels.

Rate this comment: +60

Dec 9, 2009
11:57 am

#25 quizzicalpussy :

@turtlegirl76 & Skully That’s not a squid in a hat. That’s a cuttlefish, which is basically nature’s version of a squid in a hat.

Rate this comment: +30

Dec 9, 2009
12:05 pm

#26 skeletaldropkick :

you know, #16 theleewit711 I used to looove the cuttlefish, too. Then I saw this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mGMT99i00M4
now I hold them in a different regard. All the little octopus wanted was his wrench…

Rate this comment: +8

Dec 9, 2009
12:06 pm

#27 lemonicicle :

I wish I could afford whatever is in this guy’s brownies… that’s some fucked up shit

Rate this comment: +10

Dec 9, 2009
12:06 pm

#28 LoriZig :

Holy crap, the stained glass in the best View in A Room EVER!!!!

Also, anyone else craving sushi now?

Rate this comment: +9

Dec 9, 2009
12:09 pm

#29 Skully :

So are we still cool with fish on Fridays? Let me know soon, my Long John Silver’s coupon expires in a couple days.

Rate this comment: +22

Dec 9, 2009
12:09 pm

#30 slappyknuckles :

Hold Tight, Hold Tight
Hold Tight, Hold Tight
Foo-dle-le yaki-saki
Want some seafood, Madonna!
Squids and lice, they’re very nice

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 9, 2009
12:13 pm

#31 mommaroach :

I was thinking, to myself, “Hey! That would be a great xmas card! $20? What a deal! Wait. Inkjet print?” Couldn’t they go down to the local copy place and make some nice color LASER copies? At least the ink would not run when wet, but then again, maybe the inkjet is some relevant cuttle fish refer… nah! Just kidding! This person is just cheap. I love the VIAR.

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 9, 2009
12:19 pm

#32 mommaroach :

Also, #26 skeletaldropkick, linked to a pretty cool video. While you’re there, check out the one where the cute little cuttlefish attacks the diver’s flashlight. Nice!

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 9, 2009
12:23 pm

#33 mycophage :

I hate to be this guy, but it’s “calamari”. Apologies if the misspelling is a joke I don’t get.

Rate this comment: +2

Dec 9, 2009
12:24 pm

#34 pdrunk :

That reminds me of this:
http://14.media.tumblr.com/b9vfl4b63l40jtf4BQ7H5pCNo1_500.jpg

Rate this comment: +8

Dec 9, 2009
12:32 pm

#35 Monstrosa :

Fuck yeah! This is what Christmas is all about!

Rate this comment: +9

Dec 9, 2009
12:32 pm

#36 rodgertheshrubber :

Looks like the Holy Mother is in a quandary as to which end to swaddle.

Rate this comment: +25

Dec 9, 2009
12:34 pm

#37 rodgertheshrubber :

Helen, will you calamarry me?

Rate this comment: +24

Dec 9, 2009
12:35 pm

#38 thefrog :

Hey, it’s Our Lady of Whimsicle Fuckery!

Rate this comment: +33

Dec 9, 2009
12:52 pm

#39 somethinghomemade :

It SOLD!

Rate this comment: +8

Dec 9, 2009
12:55 pm

#40 cratz :

I heard on the street that the madonna’s baby daddy is Dr. Zoidberg.

Rate this comment: +24

Dec 9, 2009
12:56 pm

#41 whimsy :

Hail mary, full of cuttlefish, the squid is with thee.

Blessed art thou amongst cephalopods,
and blessed is the sea fruit of thy womb, Cthulu.

Holy Mary, mother of coleoidea, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death – when we are attacked by schools of giant man-eating squid.

Amen.

i will now board the express elevator straight down to hell…

Rate this comment: +35

Dec 9, 2009
12:56 pm

#42 Sushisimo :

If I see a Good Friday item with this cuttlefish crucified on an 8-armed crucifix, I swear…

Rate this comment: +20

Dec 9, 2009
1:01 pm

#43 HelenaHandbasket :

I hope the “special treat” for the first ten buyers is a lemon wedge and a delicious dipping sauce.

Rate this comment: +32

Dec 9, 2009
1:07 pm

#44 kitty :

Ah yes, it is that time of the year again. Now where did I put that christmas song book about the holy cuttlefish?

Rate this comment: +14

Dec 9, 2009
1:08 pm

#45 Lisa W. :

I know a bunch of people who would by this if only it were a little closer to the Flying Spaghetti Monster… LOL

Rate this comment: +2

Dec 9, 2009
1:14 pm

#46 Skully :

#3 cont’d: Helen, never mind the Hail Marys, this guy’s got you covered for any transgressions committed for the sake of comedy:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pope_Hilarius

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 9, 2009
1:15 pm

#47 slynnet :

#20:
The squid puts on its robe & wizard hat…

Rate this comment: +2

Dec 9, 2009
1:15 pm

#48 AnaDroid :

http://ayakofansubs.info/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/dream_of_the_fishermans_wife_hokusai.jpg ?

Rate this comment: +7

Dec 9, 2009
1:16 pm

#49 fluffysue :

What the hell??

Rate this comment: +5

Dec 9, 2009
1:17 pm

#50 AnaDroid :

I like the uterus/goat painting within the seller’s shop.

Also

HAIL CTHULU.

Rate this comment: +13

Dec 9, 2009
1:21 pm

#51 kittyofassisi :

If ever one is drepressed over the shit life slings you, come here and you will at least get a good laugh!
amen

Rate this comment: +13

Dec 9, 2009
1:25 pm

#52 pjonesnm :

I love cuttlefish…so cute…But is this one crying? Is she holding a tissue for it? Is it sad because it’s in this painting? Is the tissue for her cuz she’s sad about being in the painting?

Rate this comment: +5

Dec 9, 2009
1:28 pm

#53 NinjaGato :

That nun is cthulhu.

Rate this comment: +8

Dec 9, 2009
1:44 pm

#54 Crossed Promise :

Helen, amazing. This is by far my favourite View It In a Room. I literally laughed out loud. That nun, Jesus Christ on a bicycle, she’s great. Anything with an Ackbar joke wins in my books.
*clap clap*

Rate this comment: +7

Dec 9, 2009
1:46 pm

#55 dangerousmezzo :

Best view in a room ever — my heartiest congratulations to Helen or her fiance or whoever did this work. Fucking brilliant.

Rate this comment: +7

Dec 9, 2009
1:48 pm

#56 babalu :

Helen,

I bow to your superior wit and intelligence. Truly brilliant and awe-inspiring! Hilarious!

thanks again for a good laugh at (yes!) work.

Rate this comment: +8

Dec 9, 2009
1:50 pm

#57 addiosix :

“On coming to the house, they saw the child with his mother Mary, and they bowed down and worshiped him. Then they opened their treasures and presented him with gifts of tartar and of hushpuppies and of slaw.”

Rate this comment: +33

Dec 9, 2009
3:10 pm

#58 hammerhead77 :

#41 whimsy – We should get together for drinks after confession sometime!

However many Our Fathers are required to expunge this, it was worth it. (The jock sock? Not so much.)

Rate this comment: +7

Dec 9, 2009
3:18 pm

#59 Frankenkitty :

Hail Mary, full of crabs. Does this mean we should change Christmas to Fishmas?

Rate this comment: +19

Dec 9, 2009
3:27 pm

#60 regretmenot :

“J..man..somethin’…somethin’s peakin’!”

Rate this comment: +5

Dec 9, 2009
3:28 pm

#61 Night Cowl :

And yet, no one has mentioned the disembodied vagina.

Rate this comment: +9

Dec 9, 2009
3:39 pm

#62 regretmenot :

K…damn it…K…no edit button.

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 9, 2009
3:45 pm

#63 jwheeler :

Though I appreciate the nod to Star Wars, I was SO hoping the View it in a Room would be in a Red Lobster.

Rate this comment: +11

Dec 9, 2009
3:52 pm

#64 sawdustbear :

There once was a squid named Xavier,
Who was known for bad behavior.
He climbed up a nice warm cooter,
And met a church recruiter,
And now he’s our Lord and Savior!

Rate this comment: +15

Dec 9, 2009
4:06 pm

#65 zeroonezeroone :

Reminds me of some adult movie that involved tenticles… you can guess what country it was from.

Rate this comment: +9

Dec 9, 2009
4:07 pm

#66 CreepyLittleGirl :

Awesome. I love it. I might even buy it.

Rate this comment: -2

Dec 9, 2009
4:09 pm

#67 Noadi :

Who bought it already! That is so perfect for me but it’s gone.

Rate this comment: +2

Dec 9, 2009
4:43 pm

#68 HermesGoddess :

#20/#47:
I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.

Rate this comment: +1

Dec 9, 2009
4:54 pm

#69 HermesGoddess :

Oh and also: correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t a giclee technically an inkjet print? I mean, obviously real giclees are not done on some dork’s Epsom 100i at home while he’s taking a break from Warcraft, but still…

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 9, 2009
4:58 pm

#70 dangerousmezzo :

I think the Madonna needs to wrap Our Tentacled Saviour right the fuck up in His swaddling clothes again. Or maybe she’s changing the Holy Diapers?

Rate this comment: +2

Dec 9, 2009
5:53 pm

#71 PlaneCrazy :

I just might get some religion if I could go to a church like that. None of the drink the wine and chew the wafer. I’ll order deep fried appetizer, and a shooter. Genuflect.

Rate this comment: +9

Dec 9, 2009
6:31 pm

#72 razberries :

Calamari, Full of Grace…
LOVE that title! and the view it in a room!
we adore you helen LOL

Rate this comment: +12

Dec 9, 2009
6:40 pm

#73 MyEyesMyEyes :

Wow, this gives a whole new meaning to the Mary on a Halfshell.

Rate this comment: +5

Dec 9, 2009
7:02 pm

#74 NinjaGato :

Has anybody ever heard the urban legend about the girl who gives birth to an octopus after going swimming in the ocean? there’s also a good one about a woman giving birth to a bunch of baby lobsters after masturbating with a live lobster. Sad thing is there are people out there who believe them.

Rate this comment: +9

Dec 9, 2009
7:13 pm

#75 whimsy :

i’d had a cocktail with you, hammerhead. we could do penance between shots. no thanks on the cock sock, but if you wanted to bring along one of these, well, i guess i wouldn’t complain, just to keep the theme of the evening going.

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=32036018&ref=sr_gallery_4&&ga_search_query=tentacle+mature&ga_search_type=handmade&ga_page=&order=&includes=tags&includes=tit

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 9, 2009
7:31 pm

#76 KissMyWhimsicle :

Wow. I finally joined after months of lurking just to say how much I love the Church of Cthulu-esque “View It In A Room”. I think you may have peaked with this one.

Rate this comment: +10

Dec 9, 2009
7:32 pm

#77 sbarnes2 :

LOVE LOVE LOVED the view in a room!

And ooh la la- a “fine ink jet print!” I don’t know much about printing, but that sounds like its being cranked out of a household HP. At least take it to Kinkos!

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 9, 2009
7:37 pm

#78 befuddled :

The roly poly fish head priest…priceless. Great job, Helen.

Rate this comment: +5

Dec 9, 2009
9:04 pm

#79 hammerhead77 :

@#75 whimsy – Is that what I think it is?!?
Jesus, Mary, & Joseph (on the Half Shell)!!
I could have gone my whole life without knowing that item — and that shop! — existed.

I don’t want anything to do with the jock sock, but I think the simple act of viewing it bought me some more time with the rosary. (I’d pay that guy $15 to send us a few bottles of the Ninkasi IPA, though!)

Rate this comment: +7

Dec 9, 2009
10:19 pm

#80 frostypumpkin :

Can I get this as a cloth menstrual pad? With snaps?

Rate this comment: +7

Dec 10, 2009
12:46 am

#81 rodgertheshrubber :

Before you know it commercialism will be taking the Cuttlefish out of Cuttlemas.

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 10, 2009
5:35 am

#82 sillystuff :

Just want to point out…Kinkos will use a bigger version of an “inkjet” printer to bust out prints. $500+ will buyt you an Epson/HP/Canon printer with archival inks that can print on archival fine art media…like canvas and heavy watercolor paper.

but yes, just saying “inkjet” does make it sound a little “HP all-in-one printer” quality.

anyways, it’s a good laugh, the image is. Almost as good as that santa pulling a gun on jesus.

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 10, 2009
12:07 pm

#83 whimsy :

oh hh, that’s precisely what you think it is. and there are plenty available from that shop, so don’t worry if you feel you need a moment to make your decision. they’ll make more. and more, and more, and more, and more…

yep, gotta get back to that rosary now…

Rate this comment: 0