Nothing says “Happy New Year” like buying and installing a new ceiling fan because you’ve put thick, green felt- sewn (NOT glued)- sleeves on your ceiling fan arms, which weighed them down so much that the motor burned itself out in an effort to keep spinning.
Or am I the only one on the planet who uses the ceiling fan year round?
Thank god, my ceiling fan has been begging me for years to be part of the family Christmas tradition. Now, if only the seller could find a way to attach crayons to pants in some crazy way so my kids can decorate the walls as well.
OH SNAP: http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=35543547
I like the idea of this in general, but I don’t like how you can see from one angle that the “thick, green felt” is sagging off of the sides. I’d prefer a lighter fabric with some sort of thin wire to keep the edges stiff, or something.
#14: Want to decorate the walls? My mom “wraps” all of the pictures hanging on her walls in wrapping paper every year. She’s nutters.
You just know that some little brat (like me) will turn the ceiling fan up on high so that the “thick, green felt” goes flying across the room at Mach 2 and takes out Aunt Rosa.
“what you get:
5 ceiling fan blade covers made of thick dark green felt, sewn (NOT glued) together.
fun, unique, and whimsical.
a true conversation-starter”
how does the potential buyer imagine the conversation to go?
*guests walk into the room, notice ceiling fan*
“why Mary, what a whimsical ceiling fan costume you have!”
“I know right! Can you believe they’re SEWN! no glue at all!”
Cuz, I think they might want to envision their guests taking one look at that and leaving…
I actually don’t mind the covers, although I don’t think she should have had the red balls hanging if they aren’t included (and they look a bit tacky, really).
This pics, however, are horrid. Good grief people…you only have a matter of a few days to sell this thing before its too late. Get some $5 lights at walmart so people can actually see what the hell it is!
Here’s a brilliant idea: Turn ON the lights right in front of you. You know, the ones in the picture, that are off? Maybe it’ll help showcase your ‘product’.
As I sit here (yes!) ironing some gift paper that will be used to decorate the gift box for my latest product, I realize that I do many crazy things in the guise of normal and holiday spirit. However, I just can’t see giving my boys one more projectile and attached to a motor at that.
Those little strings that are hanging from the fan need a whimsicle touch. I know where she can buy a mistletoe vagina. That would really tie this piece together.
When I come to after drinking way too much eggnog and passing out on the floor what a welcome sight my ceiling fan cover will be! Nothing says “Merry Christmas you drunken sot” than some festive felt (sewn, not glued) hanging from the ceiling!
Gotta admit, the seller has a mind for business. Most people would have seen this in the ‘Fun holiday projects for the whole family!’ article in the December 1979 issue of Women’s Day and just dog-earred it for another time. This lady’s basing a whole cottage industry on it.
OOH! I saw this in “A Very Special Double-Oh-Seven Christmas!”
“How would you like your felt, Mr. Bond?”
“Green. Sewn, not glued.”
“And your martini?”
“Shaken, not stirred. And make it a double, that ceiling fan creeps me out, quite.”
And #21 Thistle: … Okay, I’ll bite — WTF is that red thing supposed to be???
Maybe I’m sick, but I kinda like this, if nothing else, for it’s tacky factor. It would go well with our old wood panelled walls. I love tacky Christmases.
#34 carecaribou — best i can tell its a headless snake. whose aforementioned head being found in the hellhound’s mouth, who, ozzy-like, apparently bit it off.
just the thing for your little girl to wear to school to keep the bullies away. or become one herself:
“hey jennifer, whats that on your dress?”
“it’s my pet. beelzedog.”
“but… what’s it doing?”
“it’s biting the head off a girl named mary; who my mom, the whimsicle crafty witch, turned into a snake. now give…
This furthers my theory that Etsy admin is trying to make up for its sellers being Regretsied by putting them on the FP and in the Gift Guides. Mmm-hmm, yep.
Rightly or wrongly, I am now immediately suspicious of anyone on Etsy that uses “whimsical” in their description or as a tag, whether spelled correctly or not. Me thinks they are looking for a way in to Regretsy…
Recovering Crack Baby
December 3, 2009 at 11:22 am
On the Fifth day of Christmas regresty gave to me-
Five Fan Blade Covers…………
Four Red Balls
Three Hen Covers
Two Say What’s
And a Partridge in a Hair Weave.
to save money (because I’m cheap) I will now take this idea and mutate it…I’m sure I can use tinsel to tie on real tree branches (tied not glued) and instead of balls, I’m hanging the cocoon baby from the lights…if it gets enough warmth maybe it will eventually hatch…and on Christmas eve.
THAT would be a TRUE conversation starter.
Conversation starter:
“Hey man, what’s up with the eyepatch?”
“Well, my wife stuck some ugly-ass felt holly leaves on the ceiling fan, and when my kid hit the switch, one of ‘em flew off and hit me right in the fuckin’ eye.”
“Holy shit! Were they glued or sewn?”
Since you don’t mind questions, I have one. Will those bats bite Santa & give him rabies when he’s trying to leave my presents? And can reindeer fly faster than bats?
#25 Hello Happy …*glances around* I’m glad it’s not just me. I like the -idea-, too! But I’d go for a lighter fabric (something sparkly!), and use wire to maintain a frame/shape. I’d probably use felt balls, too… just for safety…
(It’s a German folk story about tinseling trees. It’s very sweet, and a lot of German families give their kids small beaded spiders as tree ornaments.)
Well, now I feel just terrible. Here I sit with naked ceiling fans, no babies on my tree, no ghoul centerpiece for my holiday table…no wonder I can’t get in the mood for Christmas this year.
December 3, 2009 at 8:26 am
ARRRRRGGGGHHHHHH! The giant monters in the ceiling is coming to get me- it’s eyes! It’s glowing red EYES!
December 3, 2009 at 8:27 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
December 3, 2009 at 8:27 am
If there’s anything I hate around the holidays, it’s naked ceiling fans
December 3, 2009 at 8:27 am
I kind of like this, its interesting and fun, shame the pics are naff!
December 3, 2009 at 8:28 am
What the hell is a monter? I was so scared I misspelled…
December 3, 2009 at 8:28 am
@#3 DucksNew
Totally.
December 3, 2009 at 8:29 am
Ninja death star complete with loosely attached red glass balls (to fall on the heads of your enemies)
‘Tis the season!
December 3, 2009 at 8:30 am
I’m sure this isn’t the worst thing I’ve seen on here although not having a ceiling fan myself, it has limited use to me…
December 3, 2009 at 8:31 am
When I think of Christmas I always picture a giant gaping black and green hole there to suck me up into its blood red sharp baubles.
But then I watched too much Nightmare Before Christmas growing up.
December 3, 2009 at 8:31 am
Nothing says “Happy New Year” like buying and installing a new ceiling fan because you’ve put thick, green felt- sewn (NOT glued)- sleeves on your ceiling fan arms, which weighed them down so much that the motor burned itself out in an effort to keep spinning.
Or am I the only one on the planet who uses the ceiling fan year round?
December 3, 2009 at 8:31 am
“want to make a statement?”
Only to the police.
December 3, 2009 at 8:31 am
This Christmas give the gift of joy, peace and ceiling fan covers…
December 3, 2009 at 8:32 am
Look, Ma! It’s whimsicle fuckery!
December 3, 2009 at 8:33 am
Thank god, my ceiling fan has been begging me for years to be part of the family Christmas tradition. Now, if only the seller could find a way to attach crayons to pants in some crazy way so my kids can decorate the walls as well.
OH SNAP:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=35543547
December 3, 2009 at 8:33 am
My dog is afraid of ceiling fans and will cower in a corner if someone switches it on.
I will now be joining her…
December 3, 2009 at 8:33 am
“a true conversation-starter”
Hey_________,What did your ceiling ever do to you?
December 3, 2009 at 8:35 am
How often do you think you’d be picking these off the floor after turning on the fan?
December 3, 2009 at 8:35 am
I like the idea of this in general, but I don’t like how you can see from one angle that the “thick, green felt” is sagging off of the sides. I’d prefer a lighter fabric with some sort of thin wire to keep the edges stiff, or something.
#14: Want to decorate the walls? My mom “wraps” all of the pictures hanging on her walls in wrapping paper every year. She’s nutters.
December 3, 2009 at 8:40 am
You just know that some little brat (like me) will turn the ceiling fan up on high so that the “thick, green felt” goes flying across the room at Mach 2 and takes out Aunt Rosa.
December 3, 2009 at 8:41 am
“what you get:
5 ceiling fan blade covers made of thick dark green felt, sewn (NOT glued) together.
fun, unique, and whimsical.
a true conversation-starter”
how does the potential buyer imagine the conversation to go?
*guests walk into the room, notice ceiling fan*
“why Mary, what a whimsical ceiling fan costume you have!”
“I know right! Can you believe they’re SEWN! no glue at all!”
Cuz, I think they might want to envision their guests taking one look at that and leaving…
December 3, 2009 at 8:43 am
i’d rather have that than this hideous thing http://ny-image1.etsy.com//il_fullxfull.101990217.jpg
December 3, 2009 at 8:46 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
December 3, 2009 at 8:47 am
I actually don’t mind the covers, although I don’t think she should have had the red balls hanging if they aren’t included (and they look a bit tacky, really).
December 3, 2009 at 8:49 am
This pics, however, are horrid. Good grief people…you only have a matter of a few days to sell this thing before its too late. Get some $5 lights at walmart so people can actually see what the hell it is!
December 3, 2009 at 8:57 am
That’s…kind of awesome! But I agree the pictures are just awful. I’m now contemplating doing that to my ceiling fan.
December 3, 2009 at 8:57 am
Here’s a brilliant idea: Turn ON the lights right in front of you. You know, the ones in the picture, that are off? Maybe it’ll help showcase your ‘product’.
December 3, 2009 at 9:04 am
As I sit here (yes!) ironing some gift paper that will be used to decorate the gift box for my latest product, I realize that I do many crazy things in the guise of normal and holiday spirit. However, I just can’t see giving my boys one more projectile and attached to a motor at that.
December 3, 2009 at 9:11 am
Those little strings that are hanging from the fan need a whimsicle touch. I know where she can buy a mistletoe vagina. That would really tie this piece together.
December 3, 2009 at 9:15 am
Bless her heart, the poor dear thing spelled it “whimsical”.
December 3, 2009 at 9:19 am
When I come to after drinking way too much eggnog and passing out on the floor what a welcome sight my ceiling fan cover will be! Nothing says “Merry Christmas you drunken sot” than some festive felt (sewn, not glued) hanging from the ceiling!
December 3, 2009 at 9:20 am
Oh crap, I forgot – I don’t have a ceiling fan! Better haul ass to Home Depot!
December 3, 2009 at 9:22 am
#24-26 regarding dark photos: Thank you, I thought it was just my eyes and/or monitor.
To seller: How’s this for a conversation starter, “Turn on the lights, dumbass, I can’t see your fucking product!”
December 3, 2009 at 9:25 am
Gotta admit, the seller has a mind for business. Most people would have seen this in the ‘Fun holiday projects for the whole family!’ article in the December 1979 issue of Women’s Day and just dog-earred it for another time. This lady’s basing a whole cottage industry on it.
December 3, 2009 at 9:30 am
OOH! I saw this in “A Very Special Double-Oh-Seven Christmas!”
“How would you like your felt, Mr. Bond?”
“Green. Sewn, not glued.”
“And your martini?”
“Shaken, not stirred. And make it a double, that ceiling fan creeps me out, quite.”
And #21 Thistle: … Okay, I’ll bite — WTF is that red thing supposed to be???
December 3, 2009 at 9:33 am
Maybe I’m sick, but I kinda like this, if nothing else, for it’s tacky factor. It would go well with our old wood panelled walls. I love tacky Christmases.
December 3, 2009 at 9:36 am
it looks like a 5-winged bat with red balls…
December 3, 2009 at 9:43 am
“Is your ENTIRE house decorated for the holidays?”
um, no.
December 3, 2009 at 9:51 am
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
December 3, 2009 at 9:52 am
#34 carecaribou — best i can tell its a headless snake. whose aforementioned head being found in the hellhound’s mouth, who, ozzy-like, apparently bit it off.
just the thing for your little girl to wear to school to keep the bullies away. or become one herself:
“hey jennifer, whats that on your dress?”
“it’s my pet. beelzedog.”
“but… what’s it doing?”
“it’s biting the head off a girl named mary; who my mom, the whimsicle crafty witch, turned into a snake. now give…
December 3, 2009 at 9:53 am
…me your lunch money.”
December 3, 2009 at 10:00 am
oh thank god theyre NOT glued
December 3, 2009 at 10:20 am
Whoa dang! I’d love to see the GLASS balls go flying all over the place when she turns on the fan.
Filed in: Maimed by Household Appliances
December 3, 2009 at 10:30 am
OT – Etsy is featuring (right now!) another former Regretsy alum on the FP: http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=33396750&ref=fp_feat_8
(http://www.regretsy.com/2009/10/30/fraggle-frock/)
This furthers my theory that Etsy admin is trying to make up for its sellers being Regretsied by putting them on the FP and in the Gift Guides. Mmm-hmm, yep.
December 3, 2009 at 10:36 am
#38…its a branches from a large plant thats sitting off to the side of the doorway. If you click to look at the photo full size you can tell.
December 3, 2009 at 10:37 am
At first look I thought they were bat wings on the fan ;P
Just what I need. More things to easily collect dust in my house!
December 3, 2009 at 10:46 am
ok, so this ceiling fan “costume” is truly some whimsicle fuckery, but i have to say i LOVE her potholders, wouldn’t mind finding them under my tree!
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=35562662
December 3, 2009 at 10:46 am
Rightly or wrongly, I am now immediately suspicious of anyone on Etsy that uses “whimsical” in their description or as a tag, whether spelled correctly or not. Me thinks they are looking for a way in to Regretsy…
December 3, 2009 at 10:55 am
The red glass bulbs are a ruse.
What these things really need to be accessorized with are a rubber suit and the batmobile.
December 3, 2009 at 10:57 am
By day, a mild mannered ‘festive’ ceiling fan — but by night, a caped crusader tirelessly working to keep Gotham City streets free of crime.
December 3, 2009 at 11:13 am
I have an 8-blade ceiling fan
http://www.ceiling-fans.biz/details/Fanimation-The-Levon-63–8-Blade-Ceiling-Fan-FP7910OB/14005.html
Aggghhh, Mommy, the Christmas spider is staring at me!!!
December 3, 2009 at 11:22 am
On the Fifth day of Christmas regresty gave to me-
Five Fan Blade Covers…………
Four Red Balls
Three Hen Covers
Two Say What’s
And a Partridge in a Hair Weave.
December 3, 2009 at 11:43 am
Tired of tacky crap that just stays in one place? How about this mobile piece of wtf? The tat goes all the way to eleven.
December 3, 2009 at 12:10 pm
I’m thinking something that has more year ’round appeal….
Penis shaped covers. Whirling willies!
December 3, 2009 at 12:12 pm
#47 if so this one could have been the bait
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=31339296
bless her heart she put it on her shop banner
December 3, 2009 at 12:13 pm
#51
You got it…
December 3, 2009 at 12:17 pm
to save money (because I’m cheap) I will now take this idea and mutate it…I’m sure I can use tinsel to tie on real tree branches (tied not glued) and instead of balls, I’m hanging the cocoon baby from the lights…if it gets enough warmth maybe it will eventually hatch…and on Christmas eve.
THAT would be a TRUE conversation starter.
December 3, 2009 at 12:34 pm
Conversation starter:
“Hey man, what’s up with the eyepatch?”
“Well, my wife stuck some ugly-ass felt holly leaves on the ceiling fan, and when my kid hit the switch, one of ‘em flew off and hit me right in the fuckin’ eye.”
“Holy shit! Were they glued or sewn?”
December 3, 2009 at 12:40 pm
Why would you want to make your ceiling fan look like it had bats? Especially whorling bats. Can you imagine how that would terrify children?
December 3, 2009 at 12:52 pm
This is the decorative equivalent of passing out from drinking and waking up to find the word “BALLS” written across your forehead.
December 3, 2009 at 1:59 pm
#54, aw bless her cotton socks- that is actually cute- well the poor unsuspecting child is anyway. Makes me feel kind of sad…
December 3, 2009 at 2:42 pm
now this is flippin cute http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=32087802
k, i’ll quit with the links now
December 3, 2009 at 4:35 pm
I submitted this!
For some reason I already have a fear of ceiling fans falling or chopping off appendages, so this thing looks like a disaster waiting to happen to me!
December 3, 2009 at 5:04 pm
Since you don’t mind questions, I have one. Will those bats bite Santa & give him rabies when he’s trying to leave my presents? And can reindeer fly faster than bats?
December 3, 2009 at 5:42 pm
Awe
Some
December 3, 2009 at 6:12 pm
“OT – Etsy is featuring (right now!) another former Regretsy alum on the FP: http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=33396750&ref=fp_feat_8
(http://www.regretsy.com/2009/10/30/fraggle-frock/)”
Any pre-teen girl forced to wear that out in public would immediately call the Child Abuse Hotline. Seriously, who would do that to their child??
December 3, 2009 at 9:47 pm
#59 pdrunk- would passing out and waking up with actual balls on your head be as equal?
December 3, 2009 at 11:43 pm
#25 Hello Happy …*glances around* I’m glad it’s not just me. I like the -idea-, too! But I’d go for a lighter fabric (something sparkly!), and use wire to maintain a frame/shape. I’d probably use felt balls, too… just for safety…
#50 bootsychoo This Christmas spider?
http://kraftmstr.com/christmas/books/spider.html
(It’s a German folk story about tinseling trees. It’s very sweet, and a lot of German families give their kids small beaded spiders as tree ornaments.)
December 3, 2009 at 11:47 pm
hmmm. do they fly off when you switch it on?
December 4, 2009 at 8:09 am
Well, now I feel just terrible. Here I sit with naked ceiling fans, no babies on my tree, no ghoul centerpiece for my holiday table…no wonder I can’t get in the mood for Christmas this year.
December 4, 2009 at 8:15 am
#65 wm: gah did you see some of those hideous pieces? and the poor girls all have those “kill me now” expressions?
December 4, 2009 at 11:44 am
gone one week and I missed all this excitement!