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Nightmare Before Christmas

Posted by Helen Killer

147 comments

Wow, this really brings me back! I remember when I was a kid, and we all used to fight over who got to put the screaming, cocoon-wrapped fetus on the tree. Good times.

Filed in Holidays 147 comments

147 Comments

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Dec 2, 2009
3:01 pm

#1 Kimmer-G :

Yup. I looked at this and my first thought was, Jesus!!

Rate this comment: +78

Dec 2, 2009
3:01 pm

#2 Dynomoose :

It looks like a snack for later for the effing Aliens!

Rate this comment: +16

Dec 2, 2009
3:02 pm

#3 Feel Free To Customise and Whimsiclise My Vagina :

Ok just snorted my cup of tea out my nostrils

Rate this comment: +19

Dec 2, 2009
3:02 pm

#4 somethinghomemade :

Gosh, I must be blind! My first thought was Buddha!

Rate this comment: +11

Dec 2, 2009
3:03 pm

#5 whyohwhy :

She’s not yawning cause she woke up, she’s screeeeeeeeaaaaaming in agony because she is hanging from a tree.

Rate this comment: +65

Dec 2, 2009
3:03 pm

#6 somethinghomemade :

WTF, this is supposed to be a GIRL angel? You gotta be shitting me.

Rate this comment: +18

Dec 2, 2009
3:03 pm

#7 Feel Free To Customise and Whimsiclise My Vagina :

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=35160528

OMG check this one out

Baby needs his nappy changed (diaper)

Rate this comment: +5

Dec 2, 2009
3:04 pm

#8 rodgertheshrubber :

What’s with the screaming wino?

Rate this comment: +27

Dec 2, 2009
3:04 pm

#9 whyohwhy :

Now I’m screaming because she’s $55.00!?!

Rate this comment: +38

Dec 2, 2009
3:05 pm

#10 martini :

Which one is this… Sleepy, Sneezy or Grumpy?

Rate this comment: +16

Dec 2, 2009
3:05 pm

#11 superdave :

not jesus…they didn’t use any nails.

Rate this comment: +13

Dec 2, 2009
3:06 pm

#12 melo5 :

she’s not yawning, she’s screaming in pain due to the burns all over her face!

Rate this comment: +33

Dec 2, 2009
3:06 pm

#13 Feel Free To Customise and Whimsiclise My Vagina :

She says to *email her is she has any questions*

I definately have some questions, and I’m not waiting until Monday to ask my questions either.

Rate this comment: +44

Dec 2, 2009
3:07 pm

#14 martini :

#1 Kimmer-G : Mine too… Jesus… Jesus H. Christ on a stick…

Rate this comment: +5

Dec 2, 2009
3:07 pm

#15 Ghost Righter :

YAWNING??? Are you effing kidding me??? That thing wants to crawl out of its cocoon and eat your soul through your eye sockets!!! I could almost accept the price if it were a Halloween decoration- that motherfarker is SCARY.

Rate this comment: +90

Dec 2, 2009
3:07 pm

#16 whyohwhy :

OMG. I love this seller’s other things… but this??

I guess we all have some creepy craftyness in us? I know, I have clowns in my Shop people are horrified of.

Rate this comment: +5

Dec 2, 2009
3:09 pm

#17 rainbowcrafter :

I didn´t know Mr. Magoo had a baby!

Rate this comment: +46

Dec 2, 2009
3:10 pm

#18 addiosix :

On the plus side, at least it hasn’t chewed out of its cocoon yet.

Rate this comment: +63

Dec 2, 2009
3:10 pm

#19 jenigirl :

55 bucks for a horror-flick baby to hang from my tree? I should get it just so my relatives can talk some more shit about me behind my back.

Rate this comment: +55

Dec 2, 2009
3:10 pm

#20 somethinghomemade :

@#14 whyohwhy – If you post your shop web address in your world press account, it will give us a hyperlink and then we can all go see your scary clowns. Maybe one will make a great holiday decoration.

Rate this comment: +10

Dec 2, 2009
3:11 pm

#21 HelenaHandbasket :

Uh oh-Kitty Dukakis got into the rubbing alcohol again.

Rate this comment: +17

Dec 2, 2009
3:11 pm

#22 Dynomoose :

The monster itself looks startlingly like Mr Magoo

Rate this comment: +26

Dec 2, 2009
3:12 pm

#23 carolina :

I think this baby may be crying because someone put her face on a hot stove. That, or she has a raging case of rosacea.

Rate this comment: +5

Dec 2, 2009
3:13 pm

#24 jenigirl :

@Dynomoose…lol…I thought the same thing!!

Rate this comment: +5

Dec 2, 2009
3:15 pm

#25 chalcedonysparrow :

Anyone else notice the starling similarity to Mrs. Fratelli from the Goonies?

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 2, 2009
3:18 pm

#26 addiosix :

#10 martini :

Its the lost dwarf, Creepy.

Rate this comment: +32

Dec 2, 2009
3:18 pm

#27 methuselah :

WTF does Fred Mertz have to do with Christmas?

Rate this comment: +32

Dec 2, 2009
3:20 pm

#28 Frankenkitty :

Nothing says Merry Christmas like the love child of W.C Fields and Sandra Bernhard.

Rate this comment: +43

Dec 2, 2009
3:21 pm

#29 everydaymama1 :

OMG! This think is just terrifying!! If I put something like this in my tree I’d be spending years on therapy for my kids for having traumatized them for life. It’s not a baby, it’s something that needs to be beaten with a stick!

Rate this comment: +28

Dec 2, 2009
3:22 pm

#30 daneault :

Is it weird that the first thing that popped into my head was the scene in the Hobbit where the party is in the Mirkwood forest and they get attacked by the spiders and hung up in spider webs?

Probably.

Rate this comment: +18

Dec 2, 2009
3:22 pm

#31 addiosix :

that should say ‘: Creepy’ not ‘, Creepy’

my grammars hath failed me there (sorry about that)

Rate this comment: 0

Dec 2, 2009
3:24 pm

#32 buffoon :

Uncle Fester? Thurston Howell III?

Rate this comment: +13

Dec 2, 2009
3:27 pm

#33 Sammy the Goose :

#21 Dynomoose – Most definitely. That’s the first thing I thought when I saw it.

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 2, 2009
3:27 pm

#34 martini :

#24 addiosix : On the plus side, there’s only one in stock…

Rate this comment: +19

Dec 2, 2009
3:28 pm

#35 martini :

#28 addiosix : If seams to be contagious today…

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 2, 2009
3:28 pm

#36 bootsychoo :

What a beautiful tree! But why is Winston Churchill on it?

Rate this comment: +30

Dec 2, 2009
3:29 pm

#37 Efit :

What the fuck is wrong with this person? It looks like this hell baby is still covered in vernix from his devil birth. This thing is horrifying!

Rate this comment: +41

Dec 2, 2009
3:30 pm

#38 Moxie :

It looks like Mister MaGoo caught in a wildlife trap.

Rate this comment: +10

Dec 2, 2009
3:31 pm

#39 itsnotschultz :

@ #29 Actually its the child of Uncle Fester and Cousin Itt.

Rate this comment: +5

Dec 2, 2009
3:33 pm

#40 Efit :

Hmmm. I’m thinking these 2 hell babies might be Regretsy bait. She hasn’t sold any that I can see, and her shop is full of items that are nothing like these hell babies. Srsly, this shit is cute! http://www.etsy.com/view_transaction.php?transaction_id=21844805

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 2, 2009
3:33 pm

#41 Moons in Leo :

Did this seller also create the alien that popped out of John Hurt’s belly?

Rate this comment: +1

Dec 2, 2009
3:37 pm

#42 TooManyCookbooks :

You mean the baby *isn’t* screaming because Shelob is about to come back for snacktime? Could have fooled me.

Rate this comment: +12

Dec 2, 2009
3:41 pm

#43 Itsnotyouitsme :

Sweet cinnamon jesus, that thing is heinous. And $55. What the fucking fuck??

Rate this comment: +17

Dec 2, 2009
3:43 pm

#44 sillymerricat :

Jesus (Benjamin Button?) has a brother: http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=35160528

Strange interpretation of swadling. Why does the seller rub Pepto Bismol on their faces?

They both look like something that would be floating in jars on the XFiles.

The seller’s other stuff is quite enjoyable though.

Rate this comment: +17

Dec 2, 2009
3:45 pm

#45 comma_splicer :

@ Efit #36 — dunno, the full description says they’re made by her mother, so I’m actually persuaded that they’re legit. Plus, more things made by her mother: http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=sr_gallery_5&listing_id=30748715&ga_search_query=baby&ga_search_type=user_shop_ttt_id_5076195 have similarly horrifying expressions, but less cocoon-and-tinsel factor. I’ll vote Not Bait, Some Poor Soul Really Thought This Was A Good Idea(l).

Rate this comment: +9

Dec 2, 2009
3:48 pm

#46 fluffysue :

Is it just me, or does it look like one of those creepy 3-D sonograms??

Rate this comment: +12

Dec 2, 2009
3:49 pm

#47 polaroidart :

This is NOT Christmas material, but a Satan worshiping.
I already find babies creepy..this is just plain scary.
I’m not even laughing..

Rate this comment: +14

Dec 2, 2009
3:49 pm

#48 Whimsicko :

I first thought the description said ‘10″ long from top to star of bottom’.

Rate this comment: +1

Dec 2, 2009
3:58 pm

#49 Goodness :

Who hangs 10″ ornaments on their Christmas tree? Am I behind the times? Are huge ornaments the latest thing?
It would look good hung under a freeway overpass, just to see if anyone noticed.

Rate this comment: +56

Dec 2, 2009
3:59 pm

#50 Goodness :

I love the sellers other items, though.

Rate this comment: -2

Dec 2, 2009
4:01 pm

#51 WrathOfFoamy :

the horror, the horror!

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 2, 2009
4:02 pm

#52 whyohwhy :

#20 somethinghandmade: Well, I was trying to remain secret as I have a busy shop and lots of eyes looking. But I suppose since I Tweet about Regretsy all the time and I submitted Jesus on the Half Shell… the secret isnt’ a secret. Hell, maybe I should advertise on here. Here’s the creepy (vintage Japan) clowns in my shop:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=35238459
There… now I’ve opened a can of Regretsy worms.

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 2, 2009
4:14 pm

#53 ohdearydearyme :

Well – that scared the crap out of me. And also confirms my belief that calling something or someone ’special’ is ALWAYS an insult.

Rate this comment: +10

Dec 2, 2009
4:16 pm

#54 sweetbirdofparadox :

The most terrifying thing about this is definitely its size. TEN inches?! I’d be afraid that the thing would jump off the tree and attack me, Chucky-style.

Rate this comment: +24

Dec 2, 2009
4:23 pm

#55 whimsicalfuckerylover :

#18 addiosix :
On the plus side, at least it hasn’t chewed out of its cocoon yet.

The operative word there is “yet”.
Unbeknownst to buyers, that’s exactly what will happen when she “wakes up on your tree”!! She will then proceed to shit on your presents & eat your children.

Rate this comment: +38

Dec 2, 2009
4:24 pm

#56 HermesGoddess :

How is this NOT #3 on the Advent calendar?! Good God. Is it possible you have found something even CREEPIER?

Rate this comment: +15

Dec 2, 2009
4:24 pm

#57 jojo :

#44 sillymerricat :http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=35160528

I think she used fish bait for those milky eyes. EWWWW.

Rate this comment: +5

Dec 2, 2009
4:29 pm

#58 HermesGoddess :

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=sr_gallery_5&listing_id=30748715&ga_search_query=baby&ga_search_type=user_shop_ttt_id_5076195

AUUUUUUGHH!!! This totally reminds me of those horrifying pro-life posters that you’d often accidentally see if you weren’t paying attention when you walked by the clinic in college. Bowl full of hell, anyone?!

Rate this comment: +21

Dec 2, 2009
4:29 pm

#59 lemonicicle :

I think we should view this “In a Manger” just for the full effect…

Rate this comment: +23

Dec 2, 2009
4:34 pm

#60 viveca_cynical :

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

Rate this comment: -8

Dec 2, 2009
4:39 pm

#61 viveca_cynical :

Whimsicalfuckerylover…. Sorta like the “trilogy of terror” doll…..bwahhaahaaahaaa

Rate this comment: +6

Dec 2, 2009
4:41 pm

#62 addiosix :

#55 whimsicalfuckerylover :

oh holy crap, that was funny. I was calmly reading your reply and then, that last sentence… I just completely lost it.

I’m still laughing.

(Well played!)

Rate this comment: +7

Dec 2, 2009
4:46 pm

#63 Avivafae :

This thing reminds me of a joke I once heard:

A kid walks into a nursery, looks down at his newborn sibling then back to his mother. “Did you save the receipt?”

Rate this comment: +8

Dec 2, 2009
4:48 pm

#64 polaroidart :

…and whatever happened to good ol’ pretty shiny bright
tree ornaments for kids to hang on Christmas trees anyway? If my mom gave me this shrunken devil baby to decorate a tree with when I was a kid, I would cry!

Rate this comment: +11

Dec 2, 2009
4:50 pm

#65 whyohwhy :

If my Mom made that and asked to put it in my Shop, I’d tell her she’s crazy.

Rate this comment: +7

Dec 2, 2009
4:52 pm

#66 MyEyesMyEyes :

Thank heavens it is a OOAK and there are not hundreds of these critters running around. Is it me or does it look like the baby is in a straight jacket and then hung from a tree?

Rate this comment: +16

Dec 2, 2009
4:54 pm

#67 ohdearydearyme :

I think this would be the ULTIMATE way for atheist parents to scare the Christ outta Christmas.

Rate this comment: +20

Dec 2, 2009
4:58 pm

#68 redhead :

The rest of her shop is so cute so I have to ask. Was the seller on whiskey/drugs when they came up with these angels??

If angels look like that, I’m a little leary about Heaven.

No way could I sleep with these gruesome atrocities hanging on the tree.

Rate this comment: +9

Dec 2, 2009
5:02 pm

#69 jamie :

that is fucking scary and there’s no other word for it.

Rate this comment: +7

Dec 2, 2009
5:02 pm

#70 PaganChick :

Christ on a Crispix.. There’s no way I can face putting up my tree, now, lest one of these hideous little monsters establish themselves within.

Of course, I *could* always buy it as a “gift” for my ex husband.

Rate this comment: +15

Dec 2, 2009
5:02 pm

#71 Recovering Crack Baby :

Oh this takes me back to when Christmas morn we awoke to hanging the youngest upon the holy plastic tree.

Rate this comment: +15

Dec 2, 2009
5:03 pm

#72 LoriZig :

With the 5 o’clock shadow, I feel that all that’s missing is a fat stogie and glass of whiskey.

Rate this comment: +9

Dec 2, 2009
5:08 pm

#73 itsnotschultz :

Oh God there’s another one…

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=35160528

…this one looks like the spawn of Cousin Itt, Danny DeVito and Ted from Scrubs.

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 2, 2009
5:10 pm

#74 quantuminsanity :

Sure sure… I want to hang a TEN INCH screaming baby on my christmas tree….

Rate this comment: +6

Dec 2, 2009
5:31 pm

#75 awakenjournaling :

That is really creepy. Seriously, I think I might have nightmares…
But to be fair, a lot of newborns are pretty creepy.

Her other stuff is cute though!

Rate this comment: +1

Dec 2, 2009
5:36 pm

#76 somethinghomemade :

#52 whyohwhy – nope, sorry, no creepy ass dolls or clowns in your store. Some really cute things. Besides, we all respect those of us who come out of the etsy/regretsy closet with style!

Rate this comment: +2

Dec 2, 2009
5:36 pm

#77 Bad_Wolf :

I definitely see Mr. Magoo with facial herpes

Rate this comment: +8

Dec 2, 2009
5:39 pm

#78 Skully :

That’s a real good thing you did to the baby Anthony, a real good thing! Now wish him into the cornfield.

Rate this comment: +30

Dec 2, 2009
5:52 pm

#79 martini :

#72 LoriZig : I think it has dice in its little malformed hand… And it’s yelling “Come On Boxcars!” Wheeze… Wheeze…

Rate this comment: +8

Dec 2, 2009
5:53 pm

#80 kurtis :

It looks like a mental patient.

Rate this comment: +2

Dec 2, 2009
5:56 pm

#81 mstiefan :

meh. Decorating the tree with babies is SO 2008.

Rate this comment: +12

Dec 2, 2009
6:12 pm

#82 jojo :

#73 itsnotschultz :Oh God there’s another one…

That’s Baby FishBait Eyes.

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=35160528

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 2, 2009
6:22 pm

#83 Goodness :

#78…EXCELLENT comment Skully!!!

Rate this comment: +8

Dec 2, 2009
6:27 pm

#84 fiery_fly_femme :

nothing puts me in the Christmas spirit like an ornament of a baby born with depleted uranium exposure…

Rate this comment: +16

Dec 2, 2009
6:27 pm

#85 grodelated :

a ten-inch-long ornament?! i’d only hang something that huge on my christmas tree if it was shaped like a dick.

Rate this comment: +16

Dec 2, 2009
6:28 pm

#86 Skully :

#83: Thanks. Actually, the last time something like this woke up in my tree, I had to call Terminex.

Rate this comment: +24

Dec 2, 2009
6:38 pm

#87 Hoosier Dada :

Uh-oh, Dopey’s been fucking the sheep again!

Rate this comment: +7

Dec 2, 2009
6:45 pm

#88 AwwwwwwwSnap :

HOLY SHIT!! I can have Andrew Zimmern on my tree!! *squeals with delight*

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 2, 2009
6:52 pm

#89 regretmenot :

#78 win!

To me it looked like: Hoyaah(insert your own puke sound)…no more strained beets for me.

“On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me:”

a freakin’ huge Rosemary’s baby.

Rate this comment: +13

Dec 2, 2009
7:00 pm

#90 WTFisthatanyway :

Silent night…what a fright… OMG that is one ugly ass baby!

Oh wait, I get it – it’s the poster baby for birth control! I gotta call my GYN and make sure my tubes are still tied!

Rate this comment: +5

Dec 2, 2009
7:01 pm

#91 NinjaGato :

I also dislodge my jaw when I yawn.

I wonder if this counts as a reborn ornament?

Rate this comment: +1

Dec 2, 2009
7:02 pm

#92 NinjaGato :

For the Crazy Cat Lady who always wanted to be an astronaut…

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=35300158

Rate this comment: +2

Dec 2, 2009
7:06 pm

#93 addiosix :

Haha my attempt at trying to correct the janky punctuation in #26 got such a low rating that it’s hidden now.

I love you guys to bits and pieces. You crack me up.

Rate this comment: +9

Dec 2, 2009
7:07 pm

#94 Ivriniel :

It sort of reminds me of Kuato from Total Recall:

http://blogs.lasvegascitylife.com/wp-content/media/2008/04/kuato-blog.thumbnail.jpg

Rate this comment: +2

Dec 2, 2009
7:25 pm

#95 babalu :

ummmm……”brown haired yawning girl”?

(a) there is no hair, brown or otherwise;
(b) this looks like a screaming straitjacketed Mr. Magoo!

Holy fuck that thing is creepy. ((shudder))

Rate this comment: +13

Dec 2, 2009
7:41 pm

#96 starrydreams :

That’s it for me. I won’t be sleeping tonight.

Rate this comment: +9

Dec 2, 2009
7:43 pm

#97 personalearthquake :

ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I want to PUNT this thing into oblivion.

Rate this comment: +11

Dec 2, 2009
7:46 pm

#98 Frankenkitty :

On the upside, at least she’s not $8000!
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=140364543008&ssPageName=ADME:B:EF:US:1123#ht_500wt_1182

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 2, 2009
7:48 pm

#99 PussDaddy :

Good Lord, I collect angels, and this thing scared the crap outta me.

Rate this comment: +6

Dec 2, 2009
7:59 pm

#100 edenartist :

brown hair? no, that’s yellow paint.
yawning? no, that looks like screaming in pain.
ornament? no, it’s TEN inches. that’s huge.

and did you check out the closeup of the other baby ornament? someone gouged it’s eyes out. WTF.

Rate this comment: +2

Dec 2, 2009
8:13 pm

#101 itsnotatumor :

hmm. i can get fetus-baby dolls and gold pipe cleaner for 40% off with my coupon at michaels and the yarn shop has felting wool…i think i’ll terrify my entire family and give them fetus baby ornaments i made myself for christmas this year.

Rate this comment: +7

Dec 2, 2009
8:17 pm

#102 PussDaddy :

Don’t angels have wings?

Rate this comment: 0

Dec 2, 2009
8:34 pm

#103 fluffysue :

#66 MyEyesMyEyes: *This* one is OOAK, but there is at least one other one, the main difference being the other one is not screaming, but it is nearly as horrifying.

Rate this comment: +6

Dec 2, 2009
8:49 pm

#104 pleasedontpickme :

Just when I thought there were no words for this item…Wah-Lah 103 comments. I love coming home to regretsy every night

Rate this comment: +8

Dec 2, 2009
9:00 pm

#105 weberly :

LOL you kill me skully

Rate this comment: +2

Dec 2, 2009
9:07 pm

#106 itlives :

#102, not the fallen ones, and this one definitely is the spawn of Satan.

I can’t believe no one noticed the resemblance:

http://www.oxideradio.co.uk/shows/contemporary_scandinavian_music/TheScream.jpg

Rate this comment: +6

Dec 2, 2009
9:10 pm

#107 The Blue Kraken :

HOLY Jesus on a stick!!! This just creeps me right the hell out and then some!

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 2, 2009
9:16 pm

#108 catspiracy :

Is it as sticky as it looks? Nativity Flystrips–hang them (yes!) at work!

Rate this comment: +7

Dec 2, 2009
9:53 pm

#109 Dynomoose :

#58, Jesus effing christ, it’s a bowl of fucking HEADS!

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 2, 2009
10:13 pm

#110 Skully :

#105: Thanks. I forgot to put a comma between “baby” and “Anthony” and it’s really bugging the fuck outta me.

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 2, 2009
10:49 pm

#111 Feel Free To Customise and Whimsiclise My Vagina :

pls also file this one under *Delusional* too thx

Rate this comment: +1

Dec 2, 2009
10:53 pm

#112 Skully :

Helen, can we view this in a womb?

Rate this comment: +23

Dec 2, 2009
11:01 pm

#113 weberly :

my son totally wants this on a t-shirt

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 3, 2009
12:05 am

#114 MaraudingJ :

@112

Holy crap, I nearly wet myself. DO IT DO IT DO IT!!!

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 3, 2009
3:32 am

#115 regretmenot :

Arrrgh…view in womb….scaaaaary.

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 3, 2009
4:27 am

#116 StinkBait :

England would find this very insulting mocking Winston Churchill this way.

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 3, 2009
5:12 am

#117 GoldenAppleofDiscord :

Looks like it needs some Desitin for the diaper rash on its face. Maybe that is why it appears to be howling like a banshee. Then there is the bonus of the severe eczema on its hands and feet.

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 3, 2009
5:43 am

#118 speedymarie :

Apparently her collection of “Baby Died in Agony” deathmasks weren’t getting put to enough use.

Rate this comment: +7

Dec 3, 2009
6:15 am

#119 takilasunrise :

Girl? Brown hair? Sorry, I don’t see a baby……..I see an old bald-headed man being tortured.

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 3, 2009
7:25 am

#120 uhh kinda :

What. The. HELL???
Bloody creepy.

Rate this comment: +1

Dec 3, 2009
7:52 am

#121 unfocused :

It looks like Uncle Fester with heartburn

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 3, 2009
8:03 am

#122 somethinghomemade :

Someone a while back made the comment that newborn babies can be ugly…kinda inferring how this one came to look like this. My youngest (now 14) was a premie and arrived 7 weeks early. He looked like a little old man with absolutely no muscle tone (and no butt cheeks). But even with all of that working against him he was still cute and nowhere near this monstrosity. I double checked the newborn photo just in case mommy had too many drugs at the hospital.

Rate this comment: +1

Dec 3, 2009
8:30 am

#123 Thistle :

it reminds me of those scenes in “aliens” where the creature tears its way out of various people’s stomachs….except the alien was cuter than this one-armed, one-legged yowling horror

Rate this comment: +2

Dec 3, 2009
8:53 am

#124 HermesGoddess :

Hee! Thistle, “one-armed, one-legged yowling horror” is my new nickname for…well, someone. I’ll figure it out. It just has too good of a ring NOT to use.

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 3, 2009
9:32 am

#125 moi :

whats with the grubby pink cheeks.

Its 10″ long for Christ’s sake! Seriously…hold your hands up at approximately 10″. That’s how long this thing it! It would be one thing if it could be hidden in the branches at a mere 2″ (say, if you kid made it as sunday school and you had to post it for fear of hurting their feelings until by some stroke of ‘luck’ it gets lost and they hopefully forget all about it next year)-but the thing is huge! It will be THE focus on the tree! Who…

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 3, 2009
9:35 am

#126 moi :

Wow..there are some typos there!

Side note, my husband, who usually couldn’t care less, saw this over my shoulder and cracked up asking why there is a pissed off crying baby hanging outside in a caccoon.

Rate this comment: +3

Dec 3, 2009
10:05 am

#127 jamie :

however, this thing is really cool and i want it on my desk.

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=35121434

Rate this comment: +1

Dec 3, 2009
11:04 am

#128 Skully :

This thing brings to mind all the baby books I nervously read when my wife was expecting:
“If your infant chokes on a foreign object during the holidays, wrap golden garland tightly around him/her directly below the rib cage and pull firmly. This should expel the object.”

Rate this comment: +7

Dec 3, 2009
11:30 am

#129 vangoghbabe :

#66
When it hatches, there will be………….

Rate this comment: +2

Dec 3, 2009
11:32 am

#130 vangoghbabe :

@#102 Pussdaddy
not til they hatch

Rate this comment: 0

Dec 3, 2009
11:37 am

#131 vangoghbabe :

another use for the Eagle Hat

Rate this comment: +1

Dec 3, 2009
11:42 am

#132 Kathleen Shimp :

#93 When I see those hidden comments, I cannot resist. I must see it!

Rate this comment: +2

Dec 3, 2009
11:43 am

#133 Kathleen Shimp :

I just realized this thing is almost 2 full inches longer than my foot- granted I have small feet, but that’s one hell of an “ornament”.

Rate this comment: +1

Dec 3, 2009
12:56 pm

#134 pdrunk :

This ornament is a casual reminder of why you got the vasectomy/hysterectomy.

Rate this comment: +5

Dec 3, 2009
1:52 pm

#135 weberly :

i know what you mean #122, my preemie had ears on his neck and he was still cuter than this

Rate this comment: +2

Dec 3, 2009
3:00 pm

#136 moi :

OMG http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=35160528

Can you imagine going to someone else’s house and seeing a tree decorated with these things? Really, imagine it. I used to know this weird guy in college that had a collection of Madonnas and other weird cemetery art all over his apartment. That was freaky. Not nearly as freaky as a tree full of sculpted babies in alien caccoons would be. I’d feel like someone needed to started digging out the backyard.

Rate this comment: +4

Dec 3, 2009
3:04 pm

#137 moi :

Aw…she was on Martha! She’s cute as a button.

http://www.marthastewart.com/article/eggs-in-nest-centerpiece?autonomy_kw=Eggs-in-Nest%20Centerpiece&rsc=header_1

Rate this comment: 0

Dec 3, 2009
4:27 pm

#138 PussDaddy :

It kinda looks like a baby got trapped in one of those machines with a moth, like that guy got trapped in one with a fly in that movie The Fly, and the baby came out the other end with moth parts. Or the moth came out the other end with baby parts. Take your pick. But most importantly, swat it with a fly swatter or hit it with some Raid.

Rate this comment: +2