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Once Upon a Time

You know, this reminds me of a fairy tale too; “The Girl Who Put Shit on Her Head and Thought it was a Hat”.

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63 comments on Once Upon a Time

  1. Dynomoose
    December 1, 2009 at 2:28 pm

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -45

  2. Elegant
    December 1, 2009 at 2:28 pm

    But..But..but it’s got a chocolate feather! After she smokes more of whatever she inhaled before making that thing she can eat the chocolate feather.

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  3. Jea
    December 1, 2009 at 2:29 pm

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -3

  4. Moons in Leo
    December 1, 2009 at 2:29 pm

    You know, I’ve been worried that there’s been a lack of whimsicle faerie fuckery lately. WAH-LAH! My prayers have been answered!

    Thumb up Thumb down +39

  5. personalearthquake
    December 1, 2009 at 2:30 pm

    wear it like you MEAN IT!

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  6. silly squirrel
    December 1, 2009 at 2:34 pm

    This is totally stunning. I can see me wearing this to all my Holiday parties. I think I will make my own, you know clean out my crafting closet an all.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  7. Bad_Wolf
    December 1, 2009 at 2:40 pm

    I’d like to wish someone would put a rein on these Bohemian nutjobs, but then I would have nothing to amuse myself with.

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  8. Bad_Wolf
    December 1, 2009 at 2:43 pm

    http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=27844860

    Picture 3… she’s lucky the hicks in that trailer didn’t drag her back to their cabin in the hills and introduce her to their deformed family.

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  9. rachealrose
    December 1, 2009 at 2:44 pm

    Are we not noticing “fascinator” here? Anyone?

    Thumb up Thumb down +24

  10. Patty
    December 1, 2009 at 2:46 pm

    The alleged beauty of this piece aside, I thought the point of the thumbnail photos were to show the item from other angles.

    I suppose, seeing this thing slightly tilted up brings its inner beauty to the outs-

    I can’t do it… I just keep laughing.

    Thumb up Thumb down +36

  11. mambolica
    December 1, 2009 at 2:46 pm

    Oh sure, it’s a fascinator… like a train derailment, but fascinating nonetheless.

    Thumb up Thumb down +16

  12. sudabaki
    December 1, 2009 at 2:47 pm

    From the smaller picture on facebook I had thought it was a penis on her hat. I think I’m disappointed to see it’s only an ugly feather.

    Thumb up Thumb down +33

  13. mambolica
    December 1, 2009 at 2:49 pm

    Bad_Wolf, she IS the hick in that trailer.

    Thumb up Thumb down +22

  14. HermesGoddess
    December 1, 2009 at 2:54 pm

    #13 beat me to it.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  15. HermesGoddess
    December 1, 2009 at 2:55 pm

    Why ELSE would she be prancing about on a dirt road in her undergarments. With heels. All she needs is a Kool hanging out the side of her face, with about 3″ of ash precariously balanced, whilst clutching a Colt 45 in the other hand–whether I mean beer or a gun is up to you to decide.

    Thumb up Thumb down +17

  16. Calophi
    December 1, 2009 at 2:59 pm

    #12: I thought it was a penis, too! I was also disappointed that it turned out to be a feather. I was hoping she made a “Choda Boy” hat…

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  17. bumblepuppy
    December 1, 2009 at 3:01 pm

    #15 – nothing will ever go with a cigarette like a box grater clock!

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  18. buffoon
    December 1, 2009 at 3:02 pm

    #12 me too! lol

    Thumb up Thumb down -1

  19. bumblepuppy
    December 1, 2009 at 3:03 pm

    Obviously, you have to wear the fake-flower-bird-feather-bandanna with this dress:
    http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=17853332

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  20. catspiracy
    December 1, 2009 at 3:04 pm

    Add unto the mystical fuckery!

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  21. Efit
    December 1, 2009 at 3:21 pm

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -6

  22. regretmenot
    December 1, 2009 at 3:26 pm

    I think this is one I submitted. I just couldn’t get past the Willy Wonka color scheme.

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  23. methuselah
    December 1, 2009 at 3:28 pm

    Clearly, by the looks of the models and locales – not to mention the shop’s slatternly rags – the Manson Family continues to thrive with each new generation.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  24. martini
    December 1, 2009 at 3:31 pm

    #15 HermesGoddess : I think I hear banjo music…

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  25. Feel Free To Customise and Whimsiclise My Vagina
    December 1, 2009 at 3:37 pm

    Goes really nice with her stylish blue towelling hair piece.

    Thumb up Thumb down -2

  26. NinjaGato
    December 1, 2009 at 3:57 pm

    I’m more disturbed by the pink teddy in her shop. SHE’S WEARING IT. I wouldn’t want someone to pre-wear my undies and she’s clearly not wearing anything underneath it, which gives me the heebie jeebies.

    Thumb up Thumb down +22

  27. Recovering Crack Baby
    December 1, 2009 at 3:58 pm

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -4

  28. The Dreamstress
    December 1, 2009 at 3:58 pm

    #9 A fascinator is a real word. It’s a small hat like thing that clips on to your head. Posh Brits and the like wear them to races.

    That said, even the craziest posh Brit wouldn’t wear this to the loo!

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  29. NinjaGato
    December 1, 2009 at 3:59 pm

    http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=30729526

    This however is sorta cute…thanks for wearing panties.

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  30. Bad_Wolf
    December 1, 2009 at 3:59 pm

    Oo! You can wear this to distract people from your lemon yellow spats!

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  31. NinjaGato
    December 1, 2009 at 4:00 pm

    http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=27916808

    I wonder if by “hand dyed” she means “I spilled some food on this and decided to put it on Etsy anyway”

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  32. NinjaGato
    December 1, 2009 at 4:02 pm

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  33. sawdustbear
    December 1, 2009 at 4:06 pm

    I don’t know, I think it would be really classy if she added the craft pompoms from the other hair fascinator.

    http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=29164179

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  34. HermesGoddess
    December 1, 2009 at 4:21 pm

    Ew! that thing in #31 NinjaGato’s post DOES look like there’s food on it. I’d lay odds it’s hot sauce from Taco Bell, too.
    I’m just sayin’.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  35. Cath of Canberra
    December 1, 2009 at 4:26 pm

    NinjaGato, her stuff is recycled “vintage” which means it’s been pre-worn before she even put it on. I do understand a squick reaction at other people’s underwear. Though personally I’m good with washing machines for cootie removal purposes.

    Thumb up Thumb down -1

  36. methuselah
    December 1, 2009 at 4:28 pm

    This shop also puts me in mind of the GTOs (Girls Together Outrageously), a 60s band produced by Frank Zappa.
    Who they were:
    en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_GTOs
    What they did, with pictures:
    globalia.net/donlope/fz/related/Permanent_Damage.html

    They had some association with the Plaster Casters, rock groupies who made plaster casts of their conquests’ penises…inspiration, perhaps, for many of today’s Etsy crafters. And so the circle of life is completed.
    en.wikipedia…

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  37. NinjaGato
    December 1, 2009 at 4:32 pm

    granted once you wash them the cooties go away, but I’d still know that someone elses vadge was cradled in my vintage underwear. That alone is enough to creep me out. I’m cool with all sorts of vintage just not undies.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  38. rodgertheshrubber
    December 1, 2009 at 4:37 pm

    I know what she’s saying…like in Midsummer Night’s Dream…..

    Puck:
    And jealous Oberon would have the child
    Knight of his train, to trace the forests wild;
    But she perforce withholds the loved boy,
    Crowns him with flowers and an over sized clip that almost looks like a cap depending on how you wear it.

    ahhhhh. I love the Bard.

    Thumb up Thumb down +23

  39. dscokween
    December 1, 2009 at 4:43 pm

    #33 – that particular one is my favorite (pom-pom fascinator) not so much because of the aesthetics, but because it would appear the model is trying to strangle herself and end it all right there.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  40. jojo
    December 1, 2009 at 4:50 pm

    #8 Bad_Wolf She had on really cute shoes though. But I wouldn’t want to wear this after her. She may have just done a painting with her cooter.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  41. jojo
    December 1, 2009 at 4:53 pm

    32 NinjaGato :

    http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=28376436
    OMG those eyes are boring a hole into my soul.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  42. NinjaGato
    December 1, 2009 at 5:02 pm

    you’re right jojo she does have some creepy ass eyes.

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  43. BettyMachete
    December 1, 2009 at 5:22 pm

    These have to be the creepiest models I have ever seen. Almost wonder if they were bred for this purpose and kept in captivity. And forced to wear undergarments from 1980′s bridal showers.

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  44. HelenaHandbasket
    December 1, 2009 at 5:34 pm

    I’m certain that the floral adornment is either plastic or “silk”, so how’d she find one that’s mouldering and rancid-looking?

    On the upside, the entrancing fabric will compliment nearly every item in my wardrobe.

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  45. YippySkippy
    December 1, 2009 at 5:39 pm

    Forget the shiteous woodsy hair clips, there’s something scary as hell meandering across the ceiling in most of her photos. We may not be able to see it but her models are totally freaking!

    http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=28349983

    http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=27968325

    http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=27874422

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  46. edenartist
    December 1, 2009 at 5:53 pm

    “meandering”? I don’t think I want a meandering hat. That kind of shit needs to stay in Harry Potter land. Here in the real world I’d prefer a hat that stays where I fucking put it.

    Thumb up Thumb down +12

  47. NinjaGato
    December 1, 2009 at 6:11 pm

    so Eden, would a meandering hat tell you where to park your trailer?

    Thumb up Thumb down -1

  48. KharmaApple
    December 1, 2009 at 7:10 pm

    This hair clip inspires me so much I wrote a two haiku:

    Put this hair clip on
    If you have always wanted
    To be a fairy

    So go meander
    Through woods where no one can see
    The shit on your head.

    Thumb up Thumb down +20

  49. everydaymama1
    December 1, 2009 at 8:04 pm

    A colourful rag on ones head does not make a fascinator! And only one angle for her pics does not help this in any way.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  50. Skully
    December 1, 2009 at 9:48 pm

    Interesting coincidence, I was just thinking this morning while getting dressed, “you know, my underwear almost looks like a cap, depending on how I wear it.”

    Thumb up Thumb down +17

  51. elephantandbutterfly
    December 1, 2009 at 9:58 pm

    “It reminds me of a fairytale, wandering through the woods, seeking out adventure and mystical creatures …”

    So she’s been in the woods molesting fairy creatures? That explains a lot.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  52. hammerhead77
    December 1, 2009 at 10:09 pm

    I have little tolerance for cutesy. This fucking cutesy fairy shit brings out the same sort of latent homicidal rage in me that the cutesy Comic Sans font does. One of these days I’m going to see some ethereal Bo-Ho fucker tacking up a Comic Sans sign advertising a poetry reading or some shit and I swear I’m going to go all Patty Hearst.

    Thumb up Thumb down +6

  53. The Blue Kraken
    December 1, 2009 at 11:00 pm

    #41 OMG LOL oh dear lord those girls eyes.. maybe she’s thinking
    “oh dear god what the hell am i doing here?! this guys walls are nasty!”

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  54. Recovering Crack Baby
    December 2, 2009 at 12:33 am

    #36 METHUSELAH— Do I know you? Are you my other half sitting in your recording studio and messing with me? HMMMMMMMMMM…… if not then I know or is it no, damn that Ideals lady. Anyhoo- I know where I can find your twin brain.

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  55. lynne
    December 2, 2009 at 4:26 am

    #32, I think the wrinkled dress and bra strap are the least of her problems……but perhaps the ones most easily solved.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  56. Dix
    December 2, 2009 at 6:16 am

    Can somebody please explain to me why sellers put three almost-identical views of an item on their listings? Left, right, and front views I could understand, but not . . . three left views. (If I were crazy enough to buy this) I’d want to know what it looks like from the other side, since it presumably does not look like a cap.

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  57. weberly
    December 2, 2009 at 8:26 am

    and SOLD, holy hell this hurts my soul, it’s like i’m witnessing the death of all things Yart Sale

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  58. itlives
    December 2, 2009 at 8:51 pm

    I love the Persian rug on the floor of the room, it makes it look classy and totally negates the 1880s unfinished basement look of the rest of the room.

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  59. FreshFruit
    December 3, 2009 at 2:31 pm

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -3

  60. Helen Killer
    December 3, 2009 at 3:37 pm

    @ #60, it looks like you answered your own question.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  61. happiness-is
    December 31, 2009 at 8:47 am

    This is a must for the really ugly chick who wants something uglier than she is…tah dah!

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  62. Elia
    May 13, 2011 at 2:24 pm

    HAIR CLIP? -it looks more like a Taliban scarf.

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

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