Thinking Outside the Box
Oh it’s impressive and all, but it really would have been something if she’d painted a picture of a vagina with her vagina. Then she could have framed the whole thing in tampons and called it “Herotica”, and Sarah Lawrence would have bought it for the Fallopian Studies building.
November 28, 2009 at 3:21 pm
Here kitty kitty….
November 28, 2009 at 3:21 pm
This really is insulting to every true artist out there in the world.
A self absorbed piece of crap. Mind you, I think this one takes the cake:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=28772489
November 28, 2009 at 3:22 pm
Vagtastic!
November 28, 2009 at 3:23 pm
“Painted with *A* vagina”
Oh, I didnt know Micheal’s now sell Vagina brushes? Geeze, I need to go buy me some of those!
November 28, 2009 at 3:23 pm
OK, not to pick nits (especially where one’s private area is concerned) but unless she stuck a paintbrush “up there” she likely did not paint this with her vagina. Isn’t that pretty much internal? Or did the Tyra Show fucking lie to me
November 28, 2009 at 3:24 pm
A girl I went to college with did just that, cover her bits in paint and smoosh herself against a canvas.
She really wanted to use menstrual blood too, but thought that might be a bit WEIRD.
Mmph.
November 28, 2009 at 3:24 pm
Wait, I’m confused. (and not in a good way!)
So, am I correct in assuming that the artist dipped her hoo-hoo in paint, and then flopped it on the canvas several times, thereby creating abstract vag prints? Same as finger painting, only, er, in this case, vagoo painting???
November 28, 2009 at 3:25 pm
what does “painted with a vagina” mean? did she use one of those acrylic personalised vaginas that was featured a while back?
November 28, 2009 at 3:26 pm
I wonder if she got a yeast infection from the paint.
November 28, 2009 at 3:26 pm
Vulva, not vagina. Jeez, if you’re going to be all “woohoo, girly bits!” at least use the right nomenclature.
November 28, 2009 at 3:27 pm
hammerhead, I’m thinking you are spot on, as they say. Whoever “they” are.
The image of someone painting with her girl bits is now going to be etched in my brain.
November 28, 2009 at 3:28 pm
looking at her other pictures I think she really smeared paint on her vag and smooshed it onto the canvas….
Check out this one http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=29799278
It clearly seems to have vagina imprints on it… or Labia I guess.
November 28, 2009 at 3:28 pm
I bet thirty bucks is what she usually gets for her vagina.
November 28, 2009 at 3:30 pm
The logistics of finger painting with one’s vagina are rather mind-boggling. First you have to squat in a paint can. Then you have to manage to get all the relevant parts splayed out on the canvas, which may require some advanced yoga techniques. After all that, you gotta clean all the paint out of your cooter!! What if you miss some and it get lead poisoning or something? Can you imagine telling this to the doctor in the ER? “Well, I was painting with my vagina a few days ago…”
November 28, 2009 at 3:30 pm
Just shows she knows nothing about her own vagoo.
Her *vagina* is actually internal, and unless she rolled up the canvas and inserted it into her vagoona, she did NOT paint this with her vagina.
Might just have to convo her…
November 28, 2009 at 3:31 pm
I wonder if she’s considered using a paint douche and splattering it on the canvas…
November 28, 2009 at 3:33 pm
#15 or a paint enema!
November 28, 2009 at 3:35 pm
I feel stupider by the minute every time I look at her pile of old tripe!
November 28, 2009 at 3:35 pm
The next time someone makes a copies of their ass at work I’ll tell them to open an Etsy shop.
November 28, 2009 at 3:35 pm
Again, I have to say — could be worse, could be asking four digits’ worth of money for this thing. . . but then I clicked the link FoldingMetalChairs posted and had to say, ok, yeah, this person is pretty fucking pretentious. The paintings made with her cooter are actually better than the ones made with a brush!
November 28, 2009 at 3:35 pm
The next time someone makes copies…
Damn. I should not drink-and-regretsy….
November 28, 2009 at 3:37 pm
hammerhead, I understood it…maybe I should be drinking
November 28, 2009 at 3:37 pm
I have always wondered what a cunt flop is- I think I have found it!!! Off to alert the old men in the bar!!
November 28, 2009 at 3:38 pm
You know, this is like a horrific Rorschach test.
November 28, 2009 at 3:39 pm
i really just can’t decide what it is that i find *most* disturbing about this. is it:
(a) grown woman doesn’t know her anatomy
(b) she is offering tours of her studio
(c) she throws her body at a canvas and calls it “art”
(d) she has a fiance’ and my ass is still single?
November 28, 2009 at 3:43 pm
Yves Klein did this with whole women, I saw it at the Guggenheim as a kid and did not like it. He is considered an important artist, but his best contribution is the color blue he invented.
Also the musician GG Allen did a ketchup enema on french fries live on stage, which I luckily have never seen in person. He is revered among punk music people although I don’t share the enthusiasm, I went to one show when he was alive and left after 5 minutes.
November 28, 2009 at 3:45 pm
How sanitary can a vadge/vulva painting be? What if there’s pubes lodged in the paint?
Granted I think the idea is kind of cool ::IN THEORY::
There was a story on the local news about a woman who was diagnosed with breast cancer and wanted a memento of her tits before he had a mastectomy so she painted with her nipples. They were flowers and were actually pretty cool looking. She ended up making a couple of more paintings and selling them to benefit cancer research.
November 28, 2009 at 3:48 pm
I appreciate the female form, but not this piece of self-absorbed crap! Who the hell wants a piece of art that smells like someones friggin’ nether-regions anyhow? Her parents must be so proud!
November 28, 2009 at 3:50 pm
At least she’s not charging 20k for it.
November 28, 2009 at 3:51 pm
The other thing that is so ridiculous about the Current Vagina Revolution is:
We don’t care about your vagoona!! You have one, get over it. Its anatomy, its flesh, and if you are going to use it to do a painting with you can be certain no ones going to want to touch that painting…
November 28, 2009 at 3:54 pm
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November 28, 2009 at 3:55 pm
@artsnark-an old friend uses cloth towelish things and told me once that she sometimes stretches them out after she’s done and wanted to frame them. this was years pre-regretsy. i wonder if she’s going to turn up here some day…
@rutgersjd-i’m going with (d)(for myself), but only because i think (a) has become a pandemic problem. if there were as many actual vaginas being painted, made of polymer clay, crocheted and photographed as claimed, there would be a whole lot of very dark art out…
November 28, 2009 at 3:56 pm
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November 28, 2009 at 3:56 pm
Look ma! I have a vagoo!! Aren’t you proud of me?
November 28, 2009 at 4:18 pm
It kind of sounds like the vagina was detachable. Just some random vagina I had lying around.
November 28, 2009 at 4:20 pm
help! i think i just swallowed my cigarette.
my mouth was open waaay too wide in utter disbelief as i was laughing like the crazy woman i am (altho probably saner than this vulva-painter)
November 28, 2009 at 4:29 pm
Isn’t that nice, but I wouldn’t consider it a painting. If you cover something/anything in paint and smoosh it on canvas it is a print.
If you want to impress me grow your pubes long enough to twist into a brush like dread lock and paint something with that, that would be pretty original.
November 28, 2009 at 4:32 pm
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November 28, 2009 at 4:35 pm
@32 – Whimsy.
Um… ew? The very day that things like that are considered art, I will give up and become a secretary.
Better start practising my typing skills, I think I’m running behind.
November 28, 2009 at 4:36 pm
Painted with acrylic on a flat canvas? What a bush league amateur! True vaginartists use oil paint on box canvases. And she calls herself a pubist!
November 28, 2009 at 4:47 pm
Someone call the health department!
Wouldn’t this be the type of “artsy” thing to give to your boy/girlfriend, husband/partner….. as a funny, kinky “Heyyyy (wink wink) I made this with my naughty bits!” kind of a thing? Instead of a “WOOO – LOOK AT MY VAGOO, ETSY!” kind of thing?
But seriously, this can’t be sanitary.
November 28, 2009 at 4:47 pm
#40
Pubist! That’s funny!
November 28, 2009 at 4:51 pm
does she load it up like a paintball gun and fire away?
love the “girlie bits” comment. haha. girlie bits.
November 28, 2009 at 4:52 pm
Something from the Maude Lebowski school eh?
November 28, 2009 at 4:59 pm
I hope that is red PAINT.
November 28, 2009 at 5:04 pm
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November 28, 2009 at 5:26 pm
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=29799278
“16 x 20. Acrylic and canvas, vagina, can be purchased with a frame for a charge of seven dollars.”
?? I feel like this is something you need to explain clearly in EVERY item listing. Some of the vagina prints don’t even really point out that they are actual vag prints and not just painted. The way this one is phrased it sounds like she’s talking to a vagina.
“Yes, vagina, there is a Santa Claus.”
November 28, 2009 at 5:28 pm
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=32562119
It’s nice to put a face to a vagina
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=29798612
“White vagina”? Say what!
November 28, 2009 at 5:28 pm
IndyJules! – HA!! Good one!
Oh, man, that film is so full of funny. I need to watch it again soon….
November 28, 2009 at 5:30 pm
#44 For the WIN!!!
November 28, 2009 at 5:31 pm
#47 – “Yes, vagina, there is a Santa Claus.”
Ya’ll are killin’ me over here!!!!
I think you just gave us the perfect saying for a regretsy Christmas card.
November 28, 2009 at 5:39 pm
@artsnark – she revealed this to me one evening after waaay too much to drink. and she also disclosed that she had been contemplating telling me for a long time.
btw, by “old” friend i meant “former” friend just for the record…
November 28, 2009 at 5:43 pm
Thanks, I know there’s a rug/carpet joke that would tie the whole thing together but I’m too drunk now to figure it out.
November 28, 2009 at 5:44 pm
Handmade? It looks like you made it with your COOTER!
Er….
November 28, 2009 at 5:48 pm
Sa-weet Naveedess!
November 28, 2009 at 6:06 pm
Oh my God! I recognize her!
November 28, 2009 at 6:11 pm
#55 – I’ll be here all night.
November 28, 2009 at 6:47 pm
I failed the Whorscach blot test.
November 28, 2009 at 6:49 pm
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November 28, 2009 at 6:51 pm
I don’t think a pic made with other people’s genitals are worth $30 (really, nasty…what gets mingled with the paint? Its not like girl parts are totally dry)
but if I was going to lather up my nether regions with paint and press the naughty bits on a campus, I’d be charging a hell of a lot more for the trouble!
November 28, 2009 at 6:51 pm
All the painting apparently are painted in the same manner. That is just bizarre!
November 28, 2009 at 6:57 pm
Coincidentally, I have a daughter named Autumn who *is* very artistic. Somehow I just don’t think she would stoop to the point of painting/printing with her nether-bits for *any* reason. Why people feel the need to advertise theirs still has me scratching my head…
November 28, 2009 at 7:00 pm
Notice she said “a vagina” as opposed to “my vagina”. Who’s vagina was used?
November 28, 2009 at 7:02 pm
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November 28, 2009 at 7:13 pm
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=29799278
That looks like what would happen if roadkill exploded..
November 28, 2009 at 7:22 pm
Her HooHoo reminds me of a Mandrill’s face.
November 28, 2009 at 7:23 pm
I know it was painted with a hooha, which is supposed to be all groundbreaking and shocking and such… but I can’t get over how drab and nasty these color combinations are.
Apparently somebody’s vagina was absent the day they taught the color wheel in school.
November 28, 2009 at 7:36 pm
I wonder if it’s possible to contract gonorrhea or herpes from a painting.
The is actual hoohaw juice in this painting. Fluids, from the genitals of a living woman, are in… this painting. If you put it up in your house, inevitably at some point you would be sitting in your reading chair, relaxing, breathing in airborne molecules … of stranger vulva. That is simply not on.
November 28, 2009 at 7:39 pm
“There” … is actual hoohaw juice. Not “the”. Clearly my mind was traumatized.
(by the necessity of writing hoohaw juice in a sentence.)
November 28, 2009 at 7:44 pm
If theres ever a reason for Etsy to become a juried site, here it is
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=28772063
*rbus away*
November 28, 2009 at 7:44 pm
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=28772489
and another reason
*runs away again*
November 28, 2009 at 7:45 pm
#67 ROFL
November 28, 2009 at 7:54 pm
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=29798612
materials: love and my secret ingredient
November 28, 2009 at 7:54 pm
@ #7 Hammerhead: yep that about sums it up. LOVELY
November 28, 2009 at 8:01 pm
My humble apologies for not figuring out the html code to post this as a pic.
Love, Etsy Style:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=21088390
+
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=28787714
=
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=34828632
November 28, 2009 at 8:12 pm
Oh BRAVO!!!!
November 28, 2009 at 8:12 pm
@69 Oh, Etsy has a jury all right. You’re sittin on it! And what a hard-nosed, nasty lot we are.
But we sons o bitches are funny. Daaaamn funny. Let the trials go on!
November 28, 2009 at 8:19 pm
@14 (hammerhead again). Ohhh I dunno, you just gotta use your problem solving skills here…
I am thinking she painted her vag with an ACTUAL paintbrush (really, why reinvent the wheel?) and then took a piece of art paper and blotted it Bounty style (paper towel in case the brand is not international… effin great stuff). Not so hard and not so epileptic yoga. Probably accomplished in less than 5 minutes… $30 is overpriced, really.. when you think about it that way…
November 28, 2009 at 8:19 pm
Thx Helen!
November 28, 2009 at 8:31 pm
LOL that my comment offended so many people…she used that word in her TAGS that’s why I repeated it here…
November 28, 2009 at 8:31 pm
Say Twat?
November 28, 2009 at 9:09 pm
#64 polaroidart :
…some people collect erotic art, btw.
if they collect serial killer’s art, why not this?
Because THIS is stupid and at least Gacy’s paintings actually looked like clowns.
November 28, 2009 at 9:11 pm
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November 28, 2009 at 9:14 pm
I dare her to use her cervix to make a painting.
November 28, 2009 at 9:14 pm
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=28772489
Those look like doodles I used to put all over my homework when I was 10…
…this is a grown woman
November 28, 2009 at 9:15 pm
To #83 quantuminsanity : No, but I bet five bucks that the person who buys this is gonna give it a sniff. When no one’s looking of course.
November 28, 2009 at 9:18 pm
No sand and no sun. I want a refund
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=28778565
November 28, 2009 at 9:18 pm
Goodness, people, you don’t know your history.
http://www.artnotart.com/fluxus/skubota-vaginapainting.html
November 28, 2009 at 9:19 pm
#83 quantuminsanity :
I’d kinda see it as more along the lines of hanging used toilet paper on the wall. I mean, I don’t even hang my own used toilet paper on my wall, so there’s a big ‘no thank you’ to buying and then hanging up somebody elses.
That being said, I think I’d be much more impressed with this chick if she urinated paint. That would at least be an accomplishment (of sorts.)
November 28, 2009 at 9:21 pm
#83 quantuminsanity :
When you hang paintings do you touch them? When you dust do you touch the object you’re dusting? Of course nobody is going to lick the painting, but you can certainly come into contact with it in other ways.
November 28, 2009 at 9:21 pm
@86 ahahah
is that what you would do?
November 28, 2009 at 9:22 pm
@#88: I believe the technique being used is different. 久保田成子 is using a brush; here… by stamping her vajiji
November 28, 2009 at 9:22 pm
Buy this and your mother-in-law will never visit again!
November 28, 2009 at 9:24 pm
I know, I know. Upthread, there was discussion of using the vagina vs. printing the vulva. I’m just trying to use my art history education in the real world.
November 28, 2009 at 9:24 pm
I doubt that a brief touch, months after it has dried and any germs have died, and any um… ‘fluids’ have evaporated, is going to do you any harm or put you in contact with anything unsavoury. (other than the odd pubic hair maybe, but I’m guessing that would be all stuck in the paint anyway)
November 28, 2009 at 9:25 pm
PLEASE DO NOT LICK THE PAINTINGS
November 28, 2009 at 9:29 pm
lol
someone should suggest she adds that to her description
November 28, 2009 at 9:30 pm
#93 frostypumpkin : Buy this and your mother-in-law will never visit again!
Better yet, I will buy it as a gift for her.
November 28, 2009 at 9:38 pm
95- Dried up or not it’s still gross. Would YOU buy it?
November 28, 2009 at 9:39 pm
So I just had a thought… many sellers throw in free samples to say thanks… I wonder what she does?
November 28, 2009 at 9:41 pm
I wouldn’t buy it because it’s crap and ugly, not because it’s unsanitary.
November 28, 2009 at 9:47 pm
In all fairness, some of the vagina paintings are pretty interesting considering they were done blind with a blunt and sloppy object.
November 28, 2009 at 9:53 pm
#100 NinjaGato :
Its probably aformentioned wad of used toilet paper.
‘Here! I wiped my nether-regions with this also!! Don’t you love it?! Isn’t it fantastic’
God help us.
November 28, 2009 at 9:57 pm
Holy shit, it just sold!
November 28, 2009 at 10:04 pm
in all of the years i took art history class, i have to say that it never once occurred to me that i would participate in a discussion debating whether or not a piece of artwork would continue to have hoo haw juice cooties months after it was painted, if one could contract an std from said painting – by licking it (or not).
god bless you, helen, for providing a forum for this groundbreaking discussion.
November 28, 2009 at 10:04 pm
Addiosix- I was thinking perhaps a 4×6 glossy photo of her vadge…that way you can display them together.
November 28, 2009 at 10:14 pm
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November 28, 2009 at 10:24 pm
Ladies- ya know how sometimes doctors put posters or mobiles on the ceiling above where your head is during a pap smear? This might go perfectly in a gyno’s office.
November 28, 2009 at 10:32 pm
@ NinjaGato :
Haha oh Lord. I can only imagine. A glossy b/w signed portrait of the ‘artist,’ the signature would consist of her sitting in a tub of ink and squishing her hooha onto the photo.
I almost wish I knew the person who bought this. I would grab them by the shoulders and shake them and yell ‘DON’T FEED THE BEARS’ Then I’d get a stick and carry the painting out to a fire pit and burn it.
And then I’d burn the stick.
November 28, 2009 at 10:45 pm
it’s sold! awesome.
November 28, 2009 at 11:04 pm
‘Gary, thank you kindly for having us over for tea. Is that a new painting I see on your wall?!’
‘Why, yes! How wonderful of you to notice. I aquired it from the online internet! From a place called the Etsy. It seems there is a lady who smears paint on her hooha and squishes it onto things!’
‘How whimsicle!’
‘Indeed!’
November 28, 2009 at 11:20 pm
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November 29, 2009 at 3:55 am
Great, now I have this image imprinted on my brain.
Naked woman squatting in a crab position, tongue poking out applying liberal amounts of Dulux to her clamato then doing a Dr Zoidberg all over the canvas.
Whoop whoop whoop.
November 29, 2009 at 4:39 am
i hope it sold with a free, big bottle of antibiotics.
November 29, 2009 at 6:13 am
#113 – “clamato”
i didn’t think this thread could get any better, but it just did. thanks for that – it’s only 8:15am and you’ve already made my day!
November 29, 2009 at 7:15 am
If I’m disturbed right now. It’s my fault for reading all the comments.
This is worse than the squirrel blood that nearly had me gagging.
November 29, 2009 at 8:23 am
Wonder how many quarters in a stack she can pick up, in one squat, from the floor with her vagina…since she thinks she has so much talent!
November 29, 2009 at 9:07 am
Eat your heart out Hermann Rorschach!
November 29, 2009 at 9:30 am
Technically, she painted this with her labia. But whatever.
Here’s a thought: if a whole *group* of women collectively painted a vagina with their vaginas (or labia), it could be a Women’s Studies Ph.D dissertation project!
Just think of the incredible contribution this would make to academia.
Gives me the shivers.
November 29, 2009 at 9:35 am
This looks way too much like finger painting, except I’m not convinced she used her fingers and instead sat on it, if you know what I mean.
November 29, 2009 at 10:15 am
Hell – she’s a copy-cat – I sold my ass on Ebay years ago. Yes, painted the canvas, painted my ass and sat on the canvas. It sold to a woman in CA. I have also sold quite a few ‘Nipple Nebula’ canvases where I used my breasts as stamps on ACEO cards. I guess I’ll have to pull those out and post them in my shop now…
November 29, 2009 at 12:18 pm
#75: BRILLIANT!
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=21088390
+
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=28787714
=
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=34828632
November 29, 2009 at 2:36 pm
#121 A copy- pussy actually
November 29, 2009 at 3:57 pm
I found this gem on the interwebs. Apparently in some rare cases your vagina can come out. The article says many women whose vagina’s become prolapsed don’t know it…how do you not know that your vagina is hanging inside out?
http://www.topix.com/forum/city/south-shore-ky/TONH3VSP4S1477PGS
November 29, 2009 at 10:12 pm
1) Helen, you’re going to give people ideas. (And if I wasn’t busy this week, I’d so make VaginaArt with Tampon Frame, just to sell it for a benefit of some kind.)
2) Once upon a time, at Burning Man before it got commercial/cool, there was a guy collecting paint prints of breasts. If only I’d known then that I could have charged…
November 30, 2009 at 8:06 am
I went to Michaels and JoAnnes this weekend, neither store carries vagina paint (I asked). Should I try Dick Blick?
November 30, 2009 at 12:30 pm
#47 – I thought maybe you could get the vagina framed too.
November 30, 2009 at 12:35 pm
So are the pubes to vag art what glitter is to scrapbooking?
November 30, 2009 at 1:14 pm
Since the negative space just left of center is shaped like a bottle, with a little Photoshopping (hint, hint, Hammerhead77) this piece could be used in an Absolut Vodka ad: Absolut Vaginart.
November 30, 2009 at 5:02 pm
This should be hanging in the Vagoo-genheim!
That’s all for today! Goodnight everybody!
December 3, 2009 at 3:58 pm
The vag/vulva thing aside, I pretty much like this. (personally I think she should have said she used her cunt to paint it, but not my call) The only thing I *don’t* like about it is the color choice. Should have been more of a prussian blue, or a red/yellow/orange blend.
December 4, 2009 at 4:12 am
Helen, please please please let us see what it would look like in a room! Pretty please please please?
December 4, 2009 at 10:06 pm
“Due to the positioning this piece requires this canvas is completely flat.”
I thought a curved surface would have been easier to “paint.”
If she requires a flat surface, can we assume the artist is a double amputee? A human rubber stamp?
December 6, 2009 at 2:53 pm
how do you even walk into jo-ann’s to buy paint for some shit like this. i am positive i couldn’t do it with a straight face.
if van gogh had done this with his sweaty ballsack i bet he wouldn’t have died poor and insane.
December 11, 2009 at 7:26 am
So are you saying that these are only labia paintings?
What would be considered a true vagina painting? Doorknobs? Bud vases? Easter eggs?
December 14, 2009 at 4:09 pm
How appropriate that the vagina painter’s only feedback is as a buyer from Creative Clam.
February 2, 2010 at 2:38 pm
Somebody please snatch that snatch!
February 4, 2010 at 6:38 pm
OH VEY SMEAR !
March 27, 2010 at 8:28 am
Why is it that every time my alma mater is mentioned it has the context of crazy artists, crazy feminists, and/or people who were the geek in high school and let their sudden “popularity” at college where everyone is weird go to their head?
Actually, while at least two of those characterizations fit the majority of the people who I met there, most of those former Sarah Lawrence students are pretty much like the snarky, tongue-in-cheek, pop-culture consuming and snubbing people here.
February 9, 2011 at 12:10 am
It’s gonna cost you a lot more than $30 to get me to smear paint on something with my vulva.
May 14, 2011 at 3:06 am
Looking at this.. On the right side of the picture it looks like she has a dick, isn’t it?..
(or her BF joined the “Party”).. -Oops, I just gave her another idea for the next paint.. may be she can draw somethin’ as they actually fuck. LOL..