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The Golden Rule

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59 comments on The Golden Rule

  1. ohdearydearyme
    November 28, 2009 at 9:14 am

    Um. I don’t know quite what to think of this except who on earth would like random rainbow pompom earrings, used or unused, except for perhaps a gay clown having a fashion disaster?

    Thumb up Thumb down +29

  2. XvMoonChildvX
    November 28, 2009 at 9:17 am

    Bahahahaa, I think this is my favorite write-up ever. EVARRRR!

    Thumb up Thumb down +49

  3. notmyrealname
    November 28, 2009 at 9:17 am

    You also get a thousand kisses with every order. Maybe I should work up a promotion as such. Gonna need a lot of chapstick.

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

  4. grodelated
    November 28, 2009 at 9:18 am

    stand back everyone, i’m a philosophy student.
    hmmm… okay, i think i can parse this as:

    premise 1: i have my own earrings.
    conclusion: if you buy these earrings, they will never have been used.
    (really it only follows that they will never have been used by *her*, at least not on a regular basis, because she has her own.)

    premise 2: if i buy something, i don’t like it to have been used already.
    conclusion: (same as above)
    and she justifies this inference by appeal to the golden…

    Thumb up Thumb down +56

  5. grodelated
    November 28, 2009 at 9:19 am

    rule.

    i thought i was under the 500 character limit. dammit!

    Thumb up Thumb down +12

  6. grodelated
    November 28, 2009 at 9:20 am

    also, this person is crazy, and i love the fake wikipedia entry. classic!

    Thumb up Thumb down +20

  7. Jea
    November 28, 2009 at 9:22 am

    The golden rule involves not purchasing used? Wow, I was way off.

    Thumb up Thumb down +30

  8. Recovering Crack Baby
    November 28, 2009 at 9:23 am

    I too, prefer my caterpillars hanging from my ear lobes to be virgins as well. It is just how I hang ‘em.

    Thumb up Thumb down +75

  9. prairiefire
    November 28, 2009 at 9:24 am

    Were the earrings stuck through a magazine page for the “model” photo?

    Thumb up Thumb down +12

  10. Jea
    November 28, 2009 at 9:29 am

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -7

  11. meanbeads
    November 28, 2009 at 9:32 am

    Yoda say: When earrings you want, earrings of pompom you will get.

    Thumb up Thumb down +27

  12. grinner
    November 28, 2009 at 9:34 am

    I like how one earring has purple on top but the other has blue on top. It’s that kind of unexpected suble twist i really appreciate on an intellectual level. Deep.

    Thumb up Thumb down +50

  13. HermesGoddess
    November 28, 2009 at 9:37 am

    Yeah, wow, how bad DO you have to be to get Etsy buyers to leave you negatives? I don’t recall ever seeing that before…then again, her listings are obviously the work of a very “special” seller.

    Thumb up Thumb down -2

  14. charmerci
    November 28, 2009 at 9:41 am

    Her first language seems to be Spanish. I think she’s from Mexico.

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  15. BettyMachete
    November 28, 2009 at 9:43 am

    I would feel better if they were blacklight tested and not used.

    Thumb up Thumb down -1

  16. DucksNew
    November 28, 2009 at 9:48 am

    I read this to my dog and he translated it for me. Unfortunately, he translated it into barks.

    Thumb up Thumb down +30

  17. velvetina
    November 28, 2009 at 9:51 am

    not for me. I like vaginas on my ears.

    Thumb up Thumb down +48

  18. humor me
    November 28, 2009 at 10:29 am

    Reminds me of Rainbow Brite. Only I’m thinking she’s Rainbow Not-so-brite.

    @#10 Jea I looked at her profile, and she says “my ratings are positive until this time”. But when you look at her ratings, her first one is negative. You have to wonder when she posted it… like… the first day! *rolling eyes*

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  19. krystyna81
    November 28, 2009 at 10:45 am

    I baffled that you managed to pick one item from that shop…the whole thing is a bit of an acid trip nightmare. “the cupcakes! they’re choking me!”

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  20. frostypumpkin
    November 28, 2009 at 10:58 am

    Whimsisity at it’s finest!

    Thumb up Thumb down -2

  21. whimsiclefuckery
    November 28, 2009 at 11:36 am

    It is written:

    Matthew 7:12
    Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men buy from you, sell ye even so unused unto them: for this is the law and the prophets.

    Luke 6:31
    And as ye would that men should buy from you, do ye also to them likewise sold unused.

    Thumb up Thumb down +54

  22. i am bean
    November 28, 2009 at 11:37 am

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -4

  23. Je
    November 28, 2009 at 11:39 am

    I could use those pompoms right now to sop the tears from my eyes.

    Thumb up Thumb down +12

  24. vangoghbabe
    November 28, 2009 at 11:44 am

    Yeah right, they are just two hash pipe cleaners waiting to be used…

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  25. Patty
    November 28, 2009 at 11:46 am

    Silly esty seller, Trix are for kids.

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  26. vangoghbabe
    November 28, 2009 at 11:47 am

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -5

  27. vangoghbabe
    November 28, 2009 at 11:51 am

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -28

  28. NinjaGato
    November 28, 2009 at 12:08 pm

    Sigh, I was having regretsy withdrawls.

    I wonder if she’ll make me nipple rings of pompoms? That would be one hell of a surprise when some poor guy gets my shirt off….SURPRISE!

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  29. NinjaGato
    November 28, 2009 at 12:12 pm

    http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=33517117

    “teen gothic and emo girls, found in him”

    HOLY SHIT she has a voodoo doll made out of emo brats!

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  30. comma_splicer
    November 28, 2009 at 12:17 pm

    Do unto others as you would have them look like they’re wearing earrings their kindergartner made them?

    And $10? Really? I guess at least it’s not $500, but come on!

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  31. comma_splicer
    November 28, 2009 at 12:19 pm

    NinjaGato, you totally just made me spurt tea all over my shirt. Nearly hit my keyboard. Good work. :D

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  32. NinjaGato
    November 28, 2009 at 12:20 pm

    How many gay caterpillars will have to die before this chick quits feeling “artistic”?

    Thumb up Thumb down +22

  33. NinjaGato
    November 28, 2009 at 12:21 pm

    You are welcome comma_splicer.

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  34. NinjaGato
    November 28, 2009 at 12:22 pm

    yep #9- That would be the earrings hanging off of a magazine picture.

    Thumb up Thumb down -1

  35. The Blue Kraken
    November 28, 2009 at 12:27 pm

    i was wondering the same thing NinjaGato…….. those poor caterpillars .. Why cant these sadistic cruel artists just leave the poor fuzzy bugs alone!

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  36. krudd
    November 28, 2009 at 12:31 pm

    I prefer the voodoo dolls that say “pussy” and “ass” on them. Hopefully they too are unused…

    Thumb up Thumb down +7

  37. The Blue Kraken
    November 28, 2009 at 12:48 pm

    #10 Jae LOL
    “Probably one of the lowest seller ratings I’ve seen. So much for her golden rule.”
    i only see 2 negatives.. you haven’t been to my page obviously..one in mine who just exploded(rather shrilly) over an accident with a tag 2 YEARS ago. then her mother called and insulted her. I was stunned by the mom couldn’t figure out how to respond in some placating way. Unfortunately she bought 4 items and wouldn’t take an apology or refund.

    so 2 is nothing jae

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  38. Helen Killer
    November 28, 2009 at 12:53 pm

    BAD EXPERIENCE WITH SELLER!!I REALLY WANTED TO OVERLOOK WHAT HAPPENED AS A MISTAKE,BUT WHEN SHE SAID MY MOM DIDN’T APPRECIATE ME AND SHOULD NOT HAVE COMPLAINED TO ME AOUT THE TACKINESS OF THE SELLER LEAVING ALL THE PRICE TAGS ON HER PRESENTS I FELT THE SELLER SHOULD HAVE JUST APOLOGIZED AND NOT VERBALLY ATTACK MY MOM!!

    Thumb up Thumb down +15

  39. addiosix
    November 28, 2009 at 12:59 pm

    EARRINGS OF POMPOM

    *said in big booming Godlike voice*

    Thumb up Thumb down +23

  40. The Blue Kraken
    November 28, 2009 at 1:08 pm

    yep that’s her.. she attacked me for the error told me her mom said something nasty about the package. I was kind of amazed and didnt know there was a mistake. she used convos and feed back to continue to rant cause i told her her mom shouldn’t of been mean to HER. let her say what she wanted about me but call your daughter up and say something nasty. I’m not a fan of emotionally abusing your kids.

    Thumb up Thumb down +15

  41. NinjaGato
    November 28, 2009 at 1:20 pm

    she seems to like giving negative feedback to sellers when something that happened wasn’t their fault.
    I counted a few “I don’t know if it’s your fault…” when the items were hung up in Mexican customs. Apparently she doesn’t realize that you can’t change feedback once you give it.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  42. HelenaHandbasket
    November 28, 2009 at 1:30 pm

    I’m confused as to what I will have to pay for shipping outside of “everywhere else in all my shop”, to which, obviously (as it is written) it is free.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  43. everydaymama1
    November 28, 2009 at 2:06 pm

    Rainbow Brite Theme Song
    Rainbow Brite
    See the shining light
    Yes I’m gonna take ya to Rainbow Brite
    Starlite flies
    Right before your eyes
    And rainbow colors will cheer you up
    Magic Light
    Gonna take you for a ride…

    (repeat chorus)

    Thumb up Thumb down -2

  44. DucksNew
    November 28, 2009 at 3:17 pm

    These might have been “nice” in the ’80s. They’d match your rainbow suspenders.

    Thumb up Thumb down -2

  45. pyro176018
    November 28, 2009 at 4:40 pm

    Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

    I am having trouble deciphering this.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  46. Ghost Righter
    November 28, 2009 at 4:54 pm

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -4

  47. silly squirrel
    November 28, 2009 at 8:04 pm

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -4

  48. fluffysue
    November 28, 2009 at 8:46 pm

    Wow my parents need to get their money back for all those years of Catholic school, since apparently those nuns had the golden rule all wrong. I don’t remember anything about earrings, or used merchandise.

    Everydaymama, that’s exactly what I thought of, too..Rainbow Brite! lol

    Thumb up Thumb down -2

  49. frostypumpkin
    November 28, 2009 at 8:50 pm

    #39, is Morgan Freeman saying this?

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  50. addiosix
    November 28, 2009 at 9:07 pm

    #49 frostypumpkin :

    James Earl Jones ;D

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  51. Skully
    November 28, 2009 at 9:47 pm

    These would look great with that upcycled pimped-out Army Jacket. But I think that jacket is used, and I don’t like if purchase something, I don’t like to get something used. Oh well, together we warm, right?

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  52. Helen Killer
    November 28, 2009 at 9:53 pm

    Skully, that’s twice tonight you made me snort.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  53. Skully
    November 28, 2009 at 9:54 pm

    That’s nothing Helen, once I made Ned Beatty squeal like a pig.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  54. Calophi
    November 28, 2009 at 11:36 pm

    #37: So lame, I’d never leave a negative unless the item was shoddily made and fell apart, or if I never got it and the seller was not responding to my attempts to contact them. And for a freaking price tag? I probably wouldn’t even leave a neutral for that! Oops, oh well, Mom won’t care how much I spent on her.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  55. kittenmittens
    November 29, 2009 at 9:08 am

    Miss South Carolina 2007 should be the spokesperson for this item.

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  56. beqi
    November 29, 2009 at 11:01 pm

    I not like use grammar, type random words, make horrible craftings. Fire hot. Flrrrg.

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  57. Feel Free To Customise and Whimsiclise My Vagina
    November 29, 2009 at 11:30 pm

    I still think she has worn the earrings, Golden Rule or not

    Thumb up Thumb down -1

  58. Feel Free To Customise and Whimsiclise My Vagina
    November 29, 2009 at 11:32 pm

    I don’t like if make a big deal out of something it makes me believe person is (yes!) lies about used thing

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  59. razberries
    December 1, 2009 at 7:28 am

    all that’s missing on these is the googly eyes

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

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