At least the description is coherent. And the artist is donating 50% to charities…and…uh…yea, as others have basically said, it doesn’t matter how many you have, you shouldn’t light your penises on fire.
Um, if I had 20K it would not be spent on these horrible paintings! I’d go get me a new van thanks!
And what the hell is ‘Opera season’? Is it when we all camouflage ourselves in tuxedos and hunt the performers through the dense cardboard scenery? I’m hunting wabbits.. No, wait… Fat ladies with viking horns on their heads!
From the Policies page:
“We accept refunds and exchanges at 25% of retial value within 10 days of item purchased and if the original package has not been distorted. It is the customer’s responsibility to pay shipping”
so if I want to return it you’ll give me back 25% of 20k? So the seller keeps $15k AND the painting? If that’s the case that’s a huge load of bullshit
Yeah, but be fair. Each separate painting is $12,500, but you get the two for $20,000. That’s a substantial savings, and how often do you get to see Jermaine Jackson wearing press-on nails and bitch-slapping his penis/lit candles???
Recovering Crack Baby
November 28, 2009 at 3:08 pm
We didn’t start the fire
Opera Man
20,000 Grand
I Can’t Take it Anymore!!!
I know…. I know Billy Joel should consider remaking his song for this era and include these lyrics.
From the shop policies page:
“We have a strong privacy policy. Your information will not be shared with anyone unless it is a matter of justice.”
So, Batman’s on Etsy now?
Yes, it’s essential to have the right artwork that reflects the pain, the sorrow, the beauty, the joy that is displayed by running your bare hand through burning vagina candles.
Gosh, all my current “renderings” only reflect either the pain and the beauty OR the sorrow and the joy. So to be able to reflect all four, plus an utter lack of facial symmetry or any attention to proportion, all thrown in the mix… When you think of it like that… $20,000 is a small price to pay. Let me get my checkbook….
November 28, 2009 at 12:51 pm
$20,000 for a BAD painting? That’s a decent car!
November 28, 2009 at 12:51 pm
quick! you have 3 dicks and they’re all on fire!
November 28, 2009 at 12:52 pm
He’s about to backhand those candles.
November 28, 2009 at 12:53 pm
‘Opera season’ wtf?
This painting is godawful.
November 28, 2009 at 12:53 pm
I keep expecting to see vampire fangs…what’s up with those fingernails! I won’t even discuss the phallic nature of the candles and the dripping wax….
November 28, 2009 at 12:55 pm
#2 Jea :
It took me a minute to realize those were candles he was about to bitchslap.
Weird cylindrical things at crotch level/position in bad artwork sets off the ‘omg its a penis’ alarm
November 28, 2009 at 12:56 pm
#2 Cherokee
You won!
November 28, 2009 at 12:58 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
November 28, 2009 at 1:00 pm
When did the Phantom start wearing “press-on” nails?
November 28, 2009 at 1:00 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
November 28, 2009 at 1:00 pm
So that’s Jermaine Jackson, right?
November 28, 2009 at 1:02 pm
At least the description is coherent. And the artist is donating 50% to charities…and…uh…yea, as others have basically said, it doesn’t matter how many you have, you shouldn’t light your penises on fire.
November 28, 2009 at 1:02 pm
I’m still deeply disturbed by the value being placed on this..20K is a lot for fucking irony
November 28, 2009 at 1:06 pm
opera season…..genius.
since when was the Phantom of the Opera played by Billy Dee Williams circa 1980?
November 28, 2009 at 1:11 pm
Them are some cultured Hells Angels!
November 28, 2009 at 1:18 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
November 28, 2009 at 1:22 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
November 28, 2009 at 1:23 pm
Holy Shit it is Jermaine Jackson!
November 28, 2009 at 1:23 pm
Best view in a room ever!
November 28, 2009 at 1:32 pm
is there a size stated?..it should be huge for 20,000 grand
November 28, 2009 at 1:34 pm
err..*20 grand*
November 28, 2009 at 1:57 pm
Um, if I had 20K it would not be spent on these horrible paintings! I’d go get me a new van thanks!
And what the hell is ‘Opera season’? Is it when we all camouflage ourselves in tuxedos and hunt the performers through the dense cardboard scenery? I’m hunting wabbits.. No, wait… Fat ladies with viking horns on their heads!
November 28, 2009 at 2:03 pm
Check out the sellers policy page! Great for a giggle or two ;P
November 28, 2009 at 2:06 pm
o.O crazy bony hands
November 28, 2009 at 2:10 pm
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
November 28, 2009 at 2:12 pm
Where’s his left hand…and what exactly is it doing under there? I think he’s foraging around for the fourth candle.
November 28, 2009 at 2:24 pm
I’m about to put the smack down on these candles…yo.
November 28, 2009 at 2:25 pm
I’m pretty sure TPOTO is a musical, not an opera. It has opera scenes in it…
November 28, 2009 at 2:35 pm
Shop’s name speaks for itself “Sloppy Angel”
November 28, 2009 at 2:43 pm
I need both. The walls of my opera house lack the proper passion.
November 28, 2009 at 2:43 pm
25- she must have used my grandmas tits as reference
November 28, 2009 at 2:46 pm
From the Policies page:
“We accept refunds and exchanges at 25% of retial value within 10 days of item purchased and if the original package has not been distorted. It is the customer’s responsibility to pay shipping”
so if I want to return it you’ll give me back 25% of 20k? So the seller keeps $15k AND the painting? If that’s the case that’s a huge load of bullshit
November 28, 2009 at 3:03 pm
Yeah, but be fair. Each separate painting is $12,500, but you get the two for $20,000. That’s a substantial savings, and how often do you get to see Jermaine Jackson wearing press-on nails and bitch-slapping his penis/lit candles???
November 28, 2009 at 3:06 pm
Love the view in the room!
November 28, 2009 at 3:08 pm
We didn’t start the fire
Opera Man
20,000 Grand
I Can’t Take it Anymore!!!
I know…. I know Billy Joel should consider remaking his song for this era and include these lyrics.
November 28, 2009 at 3:56 pm
This is the kind of Opera Man I like.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OlsSyQH0gu8
November 28, 2009 at 4:19 pm
looks like he has three candles for dicks. wtf is this shit
November 28, 2009 at 4:21 pm
…because someone had to do it:
November 28, 2009 at 4:42 pm
makes me wonder if they throw in a free black jesus painting.
glad i’m not the only one that saw those candles and went, “cock?”
November 28, 2009 at 4:45 pm
Why is there a random snail shell at the base of one of the penis/candles?
November 28, 2009 at 5:03 pm
Thank you Hammerhead! You always make me laugh!!
November 28, 2009 at 5:07 pm
From the shop policies page:
“We have a strong privacy policy. Your information will not be shared with anyone unless it is a matter of justice.”
So, Batman’s on Etsy now?
November 28, 2009 at 6:17 pm
Are they penis candles in the foreground or has all the vagoo and dick business affected my brain?
November 28, 2009 at 6:18 pm
he has a very large right hand too……
November 28, 2009 at 6:20 pm
why are the prices so stupid?
November 28, 2009 at 6:23 pm
#45 … maybe because it ships from Kuwait?
I’m a new lurker. This site/folks have brought a smile and many a chuckle this past week. Thank you.
I honestly needed my spirits lifted.
November 28, 2009 at 6:37 pm
His hand looks arthritic. Must take a lot of work keeping three candles “happy”.
November 28, 2009 at 7:40 pm
This shop just makes me angry.
November 28, 2009 at 8:07 pm
Yes, it’s essential to have the right artwork that reflects the pain, the sorrow, the beauty, the joy that is displayed by running your bare hand through burning vagina candles.
November 28, 2009 at 8:48 pm
#49 whimsiclefuckery :
In fact, I used to have two hands
but alas, the burning vagina candles giveth and the burning vagina candles taketh away.
November 28, 2009 at 9:35 pm
I didn’t know Arsenio Hall was in Phantom.
November 28, 2009 at 9:44 pm
Where’s the left hand at? Oh, right, it’s holding the “candles” where we can’t see it, I bet. Yup, nothing pervy going on here.
November 28, 2009 at 9:52 pm
Unless these are encaustic paintings made with the artist’s dick, they are very overpriced.
November 29, 2009 at 1:39 am
So, is the painting of the other dude supposed to be Christine?
November 29, 2009 at 3:17 am
Hey, I’ll paint you something just as bad for HALF this price! (I too, will donate half to charity.)
November 29, 2009 at 10:38 am
Mohammed Ali in his younger days. I didn’t realize he was in a musical.
November 29, 2009 at 10:39 am
Look at his wrist. Just look at the size of his wrist.
November 29, 2009 at 4:12 pm
#38: I can’t ‘thumbs up’ that enough!! but otherwise the desperation is quite sad.
November 30, 2009 at 11:50 am
blerg…..Picasso’s paintings can sell for 20,000….not Sloppy Angel’s….eh, no one will EVER buy them aynway…who cares…
November 30, 2009 at 12:02 pm
Gosh, all my current “renderings” only reflect either the pain and the beauty OR the sorrow and the joy. So to be able to reflect all four, plus an utter lack of facial symmetry or any attention to proportion, all thrown in the mix… When you think of it like that… $20,000 is a small price to pay. Let me get my checkbook….
November 30, 2009 at 12:57 pm
It’s the colors…makes me want to salute it.
November 30, 2009 at 1:20 pm
I’m gonna add “smacking the candle” to my list of euphemisms for masturbation.
December 1, 2009 at 3:44 am
I’m familiar with that bar!
I remember when they had a raffle so they could afford the painting.
Never should have kicked in that five bucks.
December 1, 2009 at 6:38 am
Why he showing the candles his pimp hand? ‘Cause they been holding out on him, thass why. Bitch-ass candles better wise up.
December 1, 2009 at 11:24 pm
I thought guys with huge hands have huge, um, candles! Doesn’t seem to be the case here…
April 23, 2011 at 12:02 am
True, nothing says ‘pain’ and ‘sorrow’ like having your right hand crippled by severe arthritis.
May 14, 2011 at 3:09 am
Now I understand why they call him Phantom..
he has ONLY 1 arm! did you notice that?..
Phantom of the Opera, in my ass! it looks like a Sad clown having some voodoo ritual.