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Party Platter

It’s called a “cocktail ring” because you can balance a 12 ounce tumbler on it. And it’s ceramic, so you’re all set when the hot hors d’oeuvres come out.

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64 comments on Party Platter

  1. Patty
    November 25, 2009 at 12:13 pm

    Is this for when brass knuckles aren’t dressy enough?

    Thumb up Thumb down +55

  2. sar-sar
    November 25, 2009 at 12:14 pm

    Dear god,
    Why?

    Holy fuck… is this for a Dada party? Will Lady Gaga be there?

    Thumb up Thumb down +25

  3. martini
    November 25, 2009 at 12:16 pm

    Poo poo platter is more like it…

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  4. Fae
    November 25, 2009 at 12:19 pm

    I’d like to see her Jazz hands.

    Thumb up Thumb down +27

  5. pottery123
    November 25, 2009 at 12:22 pm

    Why did my hand just start to itch?

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  6. jeffreyrcarey
    November 25, 2009 at 12:25 pm

    …uh, because holding a glass in your hand is too hard?

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  7. chicaflamenca
    November 25, 2009 at 12:28 pm

    At first glance I thought it was a hat. Gives a whole new meaning to “costume jewelry”, doesn’t it?

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  8. elephant grenade
    November 25, 2009 at 12:31 pm

    I would love to go to a party where it was appropriate to wear this. Sadly I am all old and unhip. But I do actually kinda like this one, sorry.

    Oh wait — just scrolled up and saw $47. That’s just crazy talk.

    Thumb up Thumb down +23

  9. Firehorse
    November 25, 2009 at 12:32 pm

    It could be worse – first glance I thought it was a cock tail ring – a little something to tickle his fancy…

    Thumb up Thumb down +31

  10. ohdearydearyme
    November 25, 2009 at 12:36 pm

    dang. is it wrong that i like it?

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  11. addiosix
    November 25, 2009 at 12:43 pm

    The envy of all what?

    Thumb up Thumb down +18

  12. Ashe
    November 25, 2009 at 12:43 pm

    Eh… It’s pretty to look at and I could understand maybe wearing it for an artsy photoshoot. But to actually wear OUT, to a party? It’s just not functional.
    I don’t even wanna imagine how the wearer takes care of business when they have to go to the bathroom…

    Thumb up Thumb down +15

  13. Elegant
    November 25, 2009 at 12:44 pm

    Hey chicaflamenca ..would you get ‘Hat Hand’?

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  14. ohdearydearyme
    November 25, 2009 at 12:49 pm

    Feck it – I’d wear it. I wouldn’t pay $42 for it mind.

    Thumb up Thumb down +9

  15. Efit
    November 25, 2009 at 12:54 pm

    New Etsy Rule: All sellers must wear their items for a full 8 hours straight before listing them.

    Rider to New Etsy Rule: But if your item is an insane mondo piece of shit ceramic and feathers ring, just kick yourself in the pants and be done with it.

    Thumb up Thumb down +22

  16. Efit
    November 25, 2009 at 12:57 pm

    OT – Hey Helen, have you thought of creating a “This Item Was Featured on Regretsy” badge? The good sports could post it on their item listing. Just a thought.

    Thumb up Thumb down +26

  17. everydaymama1
    November 25, 2009 at 1:03 pm

    If it had a splash of burgundy it would go well with the big bird on your head!

    Thumb up Thumb down +11

  18. vangoghbabe
    November 25, 2009 at 1:03 pm

    perfect for a psoriasis suffering skeet shooter,
    you’d have it all at the tips of your…hand

    Thumb up Thumb down -2

  19. addiosix
    November 25, 2009 at 1:04 pm

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Thumb up Thumb down -5

  20. everydaymama1
    November 25, 2009 at 1:05 pm
  21. HermesGoddess
    November 25, 2009 at 1:20 pm

    This is actually the first Regretsy item that I honestly LIKE. I totally would have worn this when I was younger and hip and routinely attending drag karaoke.

    That being said, the one in post #20 is WAY worse and less wearable. It basically looks like what would happen if your feather duster got sucked under your skin, there to remain permanently embedded a la Captain Hook. On the plus side, though, there are still plenty of people hiring housekeepers, so yay.

    Thumb up Thumb down +23

  22. humor me
    November 25, 2009 at 1:20 pm

    I think this would work really well to cover your prison tattoos that say “F***” “YOU!” When you have your ‘Get out of Jail’ party.

    Thumb up Thumb down +20

  23. ohdearydearyme
    November 25, 2009 at 1:21 pm

    Hermes – I knew I liked you :)

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  24. Flo Moe
    November 25, 2009 at 1:27 pm

    Can someone please photoshop a piece of sushi on the ceramic plate.

    Thumb up Thumb down +20

  25. NinjaGato
    November 25, 2009 at 1:29 pm

    If that plate thing was a little bigger that would be kinda a cool fascinator.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  26. i am bean
    November 25, 2009 at 1:58 pm

    Perfect for covering those unsightly liver spots!

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  27. Lick It Like A Whimsicle
    November 25, 2009 at 2:04 pm
  28. i am bean
    November 25, 2009 at 2:06 pm

    @ #24 Flo Moe :

    yes, yes…I second that!

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  29. Feel Free To Customise and Whimsiclise My Vagina
    November 25, 2009 at 2:19 pm

    oh you americans are too conservative. She is australian leave her alone. We are way more adventurous

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  30. hammerhead77
    November 25, 2009 at 2:25 pm

    Flo Moe, i am bean

    The Regretsy Roll, complete with wasabi:

    (Hey, everyone said that thing looked like a sushi!)

    Thumb up Thumb down +53

  31. quantuminsanity
    November 25, 2009 at 2:29 pm

    makes me think of these (but not so cool) http://www.worldwidefred.com/fingerfood.htm

    Also, it looks like something that would look quite pretty on one of those crazy hats people wear to the races.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  32. frostypumpkin
    November 25, 2009 at 2:31 pm

    I actually like it! The price is what stops me :(

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  33. Helen Killer
    November 25, 2009 at 2:33 pm

    @ #29, No one is immune to whimsicle fuckery.

    Thumb up Thumb down +4

  34. Kimmer-G
    November 25, 2009 at 2:37 pm

    @#33 – Killer, that’s a thumb’s up!! (if we could rate your comments)

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  35. ohdearydearyme
    November 25, 2009 at 2:43 pm

    hammerhead – you have made my evening :)

    Thumb up Thumb down -2

  36. NinjaGato
    November 25, 2009 at 2:43 pm

    I would be constantly waving my arms around to get the flies off my hands…and then I would feel stupid because they were just feathers.

    Thumb up Thumb down +14

  37. hammerhead77
    November 25, 2009 at 2:48 pm

    Helen #33-
    No one? Really?
    …because you know that photo of you in the WSJ article?… I’m thinking it’s just crying out for some whimsicle fuckery.
    ;)

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  38. Helen Killer
    November 25, 2009 at 2:53 pm

    Oh Hammerhead, you have no idea the whimsicle fuckery I’ve been subjected to. Have at it.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  39. Helen Killer
    November 25, 2009 at 2:53 pm

    But first Hammer, take #15 up on that suggestion and make on of those for me, will you?

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  40. greenfuzz
    November 25, 2009 at 3:06 pm

    I actually like this one too, although I agree it’s like a plate. Some of the other rings without feathers are more platelike even. Still it’s kind of cool.

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  41. buffoon
    November 25, 2009 at 3:21 pm

    Maybe it is a hat. You just have to walk around with your hand on your head the whole time.

    Thumb up Thumb down +8

  42. ourephemera
    November 25, 2009 at 3:27 pm

    I kind of just want to take the feathers off and make something better. ~upcycle!~

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  43. chicaflamenca
    November 25, 2009 at 3:28 pm

    #13 Elegant–Yeah, I guess that would make it Hat Hand….or Hideous Heinous Hand, whichever you prefer.

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  44. ms.beasly
    November 25, 2009 at 3:28 pm

    Bird hand puppet! Buah!

    Thumb up Thumb down -1

  45. The Blue Kraken
    November 25, 2009 at 3:31 pm

    Nice, looks like she just destroyed a vintage hat and some ugly coaster to make this..

    I know what I can use it for.. take my whiskey shots with me to the dance floor. That why after a while I won’t notice the ring, I’ll be too drunk.

    Thumb up Thumb down -2

  46. rodgertheshrubber
    November 25, 2009 at 3:41 pm

    “Handmade with provocative intent:)”

    I’m provoked, but not in a good way.

    Thumb up Thumb down +3

  47. hammerhead77
    November 25, 2009 at 3:45 pm

    Helen- do you mean the “This Item was Featured on the Front Page of Regretsy” thingee? I’ve seen that front page thing on a few listings over at Etsy. Let me go look at the Etsy version again…

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  48. HelenaHandbasket
    November 25, 2009 at 3:49 pm

    Well, it’s gonna be a pain to pull my fingerless gloves over this, or to unzip my drive-through pants while wearing it, but a lady’s gotta suffer some for beauty.

    Thumb up Thumb down +13

  49. Hoosier Dada
    November 25, 2009 at 4:01 pm

    This ring tickles my taint when I wipe.

    Thumb up Thumb down +10

  50. stantoro
    November 25, 2009 at 4:07 pm

    Take out the “tail” and you’ve got something going!!!!

    Thumb up Thumb down -1

  51. Flo Moe
    November 25, 2009 at 8:13 pm

    #30 hammerhead77
    You Rock

    Thumb up Thumb down -1

  52. silly squirrel
    November 25, 2009 at 8:49 pm

    Stunning!

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  53. sbarnes2
    November 25, 2009 at 9:57 pm

    OH MY GOD

    Out of the corner of my eye, I thought that was a hat and thought “Oh, cute!” until I looked close and asked “Why god why?!?”

    Best not slap a bitch with that on or you’ll be payin some dental bills.

    Thumb up Thumb down -2

  54. Nee Stewart
    November 26, 2009 at 1:07 am

    I think the use of “Ritzy” in the title is right up there with using “Classy”: if you call it that, it automatically isn’t.

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  55. i am bean
    November 26, 2009 at 11:07 am

    @ #30 hammerhead77:

    perfect!…nice ‘tuna roll’

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  56. Skully
    November 27, 2009 at 10:20 am

    Somewhere there’s a bare-assed crow flying around, pissed off that he gave his tail feathers for this taint tickler.

    Thumb up Thumb down +5

  57. Recovering Crack Baby
    November 27, 2009 at 9:27 pm

    #30 You truly have an eye for art…… the way you put the vagina to the side..mmmmaaaaaaaawwwwhhhh… simply stunning.
    On another serious note here. If I wore this to…. oh anywhere, someone would for surely call animal control and have my hand shot with a dart and locked up in a cage.

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  58. worldfamousfudgy
    November 27, 2009 at 10:45 pm

    On some level, I almost like this!

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  59. BettyMachete
    November 28, 2009 at 4:15 pm

    Buys hammerhead77 a drink. That’s brilliant.

    Thumb up Thumb down +1

  60. realestateking
    November 28, 2009 at 10:33 pm

    She doesn’t mention if this is dishwasher/microwave safe??

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  61. razberries
    December 1, 2009 at 7:33 am

    for those of you that actually like this ring but balk at the price, i am sure it is easy to make one for yourself- just crazy glue some feathers to a black plastic plate- may be lighter than the ceramic one pictured…

    Thumb up Thumb down +2

  62. itlives
    December 3, 2009 at 1:15 am

    How many innocent feather dusters and vintage lampshades had to die to make this piece? HOW MANY???

    Oh, the humanity!

    Thumb up Thumb down -2

  63. all class
    December 4, 2009 at 2:19 pm

    call me crazy ..but I love it. love it! love it! love it!

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

  64. Elia
    May 13, 2011 at 2:26 pm

    Cocktail ring.. WTF?..

    it’s more like a Cock-Tail. it actually is, You tasteless freak!

    Thumb up Thumb down 0

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