Honey, I Shrunk the Kids
101 comments
Now, when you say, “custom”, do you mean “painting you and your husband at 1:87 scale”? Because I’m not sure I want to get married in the Department 56 Wedding Village.

By the way, this takes four weeks to arrive, so hopefully Dumbeldore’s spell will have worn off by then and you’ll be tall enough to refuse the package.
11:03 am
wow, those people who paint on grains of rice or getting GOOD!
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11:04 am
I keep trying to figure out what really is wrong about this painting. It’s mesmerizing.
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11:06 am
Dumbledore*
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11:07 am
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11:07 am
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11:09 am
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11:09 am
200.00? I think she must have meant .20.
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11:09 am
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11:11 am
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11:12 am
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11:13 am
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11:15 am
Wow, only $200 and you can’t be bothered to paint more than 6 square inches?
If I double the price, would you at least fill the whole $#@@%^g canvas???
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11:15 am
doesn’t look like canvas either. What a deal! I get shrunk and no canvas all for $200!
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11:16 am
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11:16 am
“Isn’t he dreamy? This portrait is inspired by the trinity of important males in my life, namely my husband, my father, and one of my grandfathers. Strangely enough, I also see a resemblance to Elvis . . . subconscious, perhaps? Hmmm.”
No, do go on…..*makes notes*
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11:16 am
Yes
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11:22 am
I wonder what would happen if a little person comissioned a portrait by this artist… Would it come out as them being average height, or would it come out as them being a teeny tiny person? hmm…
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11:25 am
#15 made me snort. I’m strangely proud of it.
I personally think that gorgeous copper paint around the bubbled couple is worth every penny. The SMOOTH paint application is sublime.
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11:28 am
#15: LOL at (yes!) work, thanks!
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11:29 am
Looks like tiny people in front of a potted cactus! If I were to commission a memorable portrait for that price, it would not be with this person!
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11:30 am
Maybe the couple requested that they were painted looking younger and the artist got a bit carried away. Sometimes, the artistic liberties go straight to your head.
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11:31 am
Well this explains the mini people:
“Most paintings you see are small-scale acrylic illustrations . . .”
Small scale! See they are meant to be woodland fairy scale ;P
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11:31 am
I think the portrait is on wood…..so perhaps a piece of furniture got ruined.
Where’s the room shot?
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11:32 am
They are childhood sweethearts! They are getting painted as though they were married at 8 years old in the playground behind the bigtoy.
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11:33 am
Anyone read the “artists” profile?
“In college, I majored in art for several years before becoming a nurse, and was mosty influenced by Cindy Sherman, Klimt, Waterhouse, El Greco . . Today, my greatest influence is my daughter; you will find that many of my paintings seem more like illustrations. I have been reading a lot of children’s books with my daughter lately, and I believe the influence has rubbed off . . .”
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11:35 am
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11:37 am
Yikes, the size of the groom’s head…
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11:38 am
Honey, remember your nightmare where an evil witch turned us into trolls on our wedding day? Well, wah-lah! Here it is, captured in an extra special way, Happy Anniversary!
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11:40 am
wah-lah, indeed.
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11:40 am
I want to marry Regretsy and commission a portrait to mark our day has husband and site.
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11:42 am
I’ve heard of people that paint with their feet.
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11:44 am
“Wouldn’t you like to capture a special moment in an extra-special way?”
YES!
“Let me paint that moment for you!”
Not that special, but thanks.
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11:44 am
How do you know it’s not what was ordered?
“Hi, yeah, can you paint us at 8 years old? Uh-huh. It’s our wedding day. No – why would that be wierd? Oh, and we’re both really into potted cacti, so you need to work that in. On a cloud of woodgrain for a classy touch, if you can. No, I prefer orangy if you have that. And can you do us with extra shiny heads? Yeah – that’d be great. We just adore extra shiny heads. Brilliant – should I pay you now or later? Fantastic.”
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11:45 am
If you shake it, does snow fall?
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11:46 am
nope. it’s definitely done on canvas, guys. if you zoom on it, you can see the weave.
and #31…very, very funny.
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11:50 am
You’re right #33.
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11:51 am
Is the groom wearing spats?
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11:59 am
For $200, we can take a portrait of you on a special day and create a “re-imagining” as if you were the star of your own TLC show about small people.
LOL @ #35 I think he is!
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12:07 pm
I believe what this painting illustrates is illegal in 48 states.
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12:10 pm
It reminds me of “The Sky’s the Limit” video by Notorious B.I.G.
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12:11 pm
Is it just me or does the “women” remind anyone else of Raven Simone?
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12:11 pm
(the painting not the pic)
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12:23 pm
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12:30 pm
Jeffreycarey wins my max titters award for this thread.
Collect your prize from the reception desk- it’s a special portrait I had painted of you from a photograph I took with my computer…..
It’s very realistic.
p
x
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12:30 pm
#37, I don’t get it…
Am I just slow or something?
Seeing as I’m in Canada, I don’t know much “aboot” your laws… ; )
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12:36 pm
#42- 2nd option.
Bless!
p
x
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12:37 pm
@42 WrathOfFoamy –
Most US States frown upon children getting married. Most…
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12:41 pm
oh! Duh! ha ha… I thought there was some kind of law trying to stop “little people” from marrying! now I look dumb! just not as dumb as the painting in question
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12:42 pm
btw… most? in what state would 8yr olds be allowed to marry?
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12:42 pm
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12:44 pm
@46 WrathOfFoamy –
Well, I was going to make a few jokes about certain US states but you know…decided against it.
Really no states allow children to marry.
Except maybe Kentucky.
I can say that because my family is from Kentucky, right?
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12:47 pm
#47 is too awesome! ha ha…
yeah, kids can’t get married here either, so I didn’t think of that one… oh well. maybe I can redeem myself later on…
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12:48 pm
Okay, after staring into dementia, er, I mean the dimensions, I *think* I see how she dwarfed the groom. His jacket falls long, almost like a duster jacket, and she painted his arms really long, like to the coat hem. Not so in the photo. Now his legs look uber short, arms long. He is taller than the bride, but in the picture, they look about the same height, likely due to her dress, veil, etc, broadening. You can see they are not, as his shoulders are above hers.
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12:50 pm
That being said, if you cannot proportionately execute an illustration, best not to open up an Etsy shop and charge $200 for painting normal size folks you revision with dwarfism on your MDF particle board coffee table.
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12:53 pm
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12:55 pm
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1:00 pm
Sorry, VoteAudrey, you lost me. Were you being racist?
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1:03 pm
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1:04 pm
Oh, pauldodo, you can give my portrait to WrathOfFoamy. I think she’s shorter than me and, besides, we all look the same to me.
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1:18 pm
This is what you and your bride would look like if you had achondroplasia.
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1:28 pm
seriously chronic…
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1:49 pm
My husband just said: “I wouldn’t let her paint my garage”
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1:58 pm
“In college, I majored in art for several years…” I see. So you were out sick the day they covered the Vitruvian Man, then?
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2:03 pm
Is it just me or does the guys face look extremely long in the painting?? They look like 2 kids in their parent wedding clothes
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2:22 pm
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2:24 pm
It’s Gary Coleman’s wedding day — totally the first thing I thought when I saw this.
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2:25 pm
It was not a good idea for the seller to include the photograph she was working from — this only works as a selling tool if your painting looks respectably like the inspiration.
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2:30 pm
#67: Ha! You’re right, that’s totally Gary Coleman.
I’m thinking the bride’s family might be more like a gigantic halved kiwi. Honeydew melons are more round and lighter green.
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2:48 pm
Its amazing that the turn around time is four weeks considering she is shrinking everything down
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2:55 pm
That’s just sad
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3:49 pm
According to the artist’s profile:
“As I paint, I’m finding a playful part of me emerge: much of my subject material revolves around notions of dolls and dress-up and manipulating these very plastic concepts into tongue-and-cheekery.”
This could explain why she turns her subjects into Fisher-Price playhouse people. Tongue-and-cheekery may just be the new whimsicle!
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4:03 pm
So glad to Lilliput has a strong appreciation for the arts. (The mini-arts.)
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4:04 pm
…glad to *see* Lilliput
Jesus.
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5:05 pm
Its actually more concerning that the groom was fitted with such an ill fitting jacket
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6:34 pm
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7:01 pm
Beetlejuice, beetlejuice, beetlejuice!
@ #30. Nice, HAHA!
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7:02 pm
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7:11 pm
don’t laugh, that’s his shawty
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2:58 am
HAAAAAAAAA.
Thats all I have to say.
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5:00 am
#27 That’s what I thought. The bad proportions wouldn’t as noticeable if they didn’t have huge heads.
But the quality is still horrible.
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5:24 am
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=34901378
The seller removed the original listing because it was oft viewed but unhearted and she couldn’t understand why, but with renewed confidence has relisted.
Who wants to break the regretsy to her?
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5:26 am
“Initially, I was so upset that I deleted the listing, feeling like an utter failure. But after thinking about it, I decided to relist it. This can be an interesting learning experience. And bad art needs a forum too.
Something about this painting attracted attention, yet immediately disappointed. I am curious . . . Drop me a line.
I was inspired to at least start a new blog:
http://www.thebaaadartist.blogspot.com.”
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7:01 am
She’s manipulating her paintings with “Tongue-and-cheekery”?? Say what!
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7:05 am
Oh man, she re-listed it because no one “hearted” it… So sad! It’s now $150–people! The price shrunk too
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7:07 am
Oops, here’s the link: http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=34901378
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8:31 am
And for 3 bucks you can have her critique your work.
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=34905135
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8:38 am
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8:48 am
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10:00 am
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6:09 pm
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6:31 pm
Almost.
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8:58 pm
And as much as i live regretsy i really think we have all sent the wrong message to her. HAve a look at her shop, as well as sold items, and she does have some talent. I bought one of her paintings because i liked it- the Dreamboat one.
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9:00 pm
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9:49 pm
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=35018438
It has a def. Toulouse Lautrec vibe to it. The way I see it, if you’re not a major suckass (which she really kinda isn’t) criticism only makes you better.
Art is my fulltime job, and I snark my own stuff like mad. Then for extra checks and balances, send it to my snarkiest friends while it is in progress.
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3:59 am
Broken link.
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4:59 am
Item now located here:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=34901378
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6:00 pm
Now THAT’S art. Love the extra long arms and her added goatee. And pickles for a backdrop. Heirloom quality.
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4:40 pm
While the little flower girl was bored during the wedding party’s photography session after the ceremony, she crayoned this depiction of the Junior Groom and Junior Bride, but her mother threw it out while she wasn’t looking, as it wasn’t particularly good.
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3:44 am
after looking at the items featured on regretsy, i think this is my all time favorite item.
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6:59 am
Im sorry but the painting is overpriced for the quality of it.
Also, they look like miniature ’slaves’ in the painting with the big white lips and all. Sorry but not flaturing at all.
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11:00 am
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