Amazon.com
Barnes & Noble
Borders
IndieBound
RandomHouse.com
and other retailers

3/18/10 TOTAL: $661.69

Profits from Regretsy merchandise are used to hire Etsy artists to create handmade products for various charities, or to directly benefit Etsy sellers in need.

All revenue generated by Regretsy.com is donated to charitable works. See our Charity page for complete information.

Money raised to date for all projects: $1761.69

Click here to visit our Zazzle store

Green Sleaves

Posted by Helen Killer

96 comments

Maybe you should sell the Tonka truck and buy an iron.

Filed in Clothing, Fairies 96 comments

96 Comments

Add Comment

Nov 17, 2009
7:27 am

#1 Jea :

If she ironed it and cropped the photo and put her legs together she could bump the price to $30.

Rate this comment: +4

Nov 17, 2009
7:29 am

#2 reqbat :

the stance makes the wearer look like s/he’s at a urinal.

Rate this comment: +4

Nov 17, 2009
7:31 am

#3 jeffreyrcarey :

Why is she standing like that? And, sell the crown, too, or at least let us see the dress with the crown on! This is just too much!

Rate this comment: +2

Nov 17, 2009
7:32 am

#4 ilhu :

ugh! parquet floors. that explains everything.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
7:33 am

#5 Helen Killer :

I think her back hurts from picking up toys.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
7:33 am

#6 jeffreyrcarey :

Oh, we can’t make fun of her…she might be of Native American heritage. Glad she has the Shout ready, though.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
7:36 am

#7 The Runaway Lawyer :

I don’t like to iron either, but damn – hang that sucker near the shower and steam the tar out of it first!

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
7:37 am

#8 PixenKristen :

The outfit is certainly not the worst item in the shop…

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=31471201

Rate this comment: +2

Nov 17, 2009
7:38 am

#9 Jea :

I actually like how the halter and the lace looks on the top portion.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
7:39 am

#10 jeffreyrcarey :

Picking up toys. LOL. She got tired of putting this dress back in the dress-up bin and decided to sell it instead.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
7:40 am

#11 Kamikaze-go-in Straight To Hell :

I’m no expert on perspective; but if that’s a standard door behind her I think the seller tops out at over 6 feet tall. Maybe we should just humor this one.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
7:41 am

#12 Cold Salt :

No kidding, Jea. And the price bump would cover the iron; you can get a cheapo one for under $15.

You know, the Gentleman with the thistledown hair would probablty encase her in the Black Pillar of Doom for associating fairies with this dress thing.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
7:42 am

#13 wendyokoopa :

I don’t know what in the hell her intentions were but that is the worst thing I think I’ve ever seen.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
7:43 am

#14 Lexiii :

Looks like she has to poop.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
7:45 am

#15 comma_splicer :

Other than the weak photography, this is actually IMO one of the better things in her shop. Most of it is sort of blandly non-awesome (e.g., http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=30018803 ) — but what’s up with this doll http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=31471201 ? “An extra idea: This used to be a peeing doll and the tube is still inside. Use a medicine syringe in it’s mouth and it can ‘bleed’.” Do I need a broken menstruating doll?…

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
7:49 am

#16 Ivriniel :

She has this tagged as “gothic”. I do not think the word means what she thinks it means.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
7:51 am

#17 Frogsnew :

My son plays football and that’s the stance he’d take on the field right before he dropped into the three-point position to charge at the other team. (yes, I’m a horrible football mom, I don’t know technical terms)

Rate this comment: +2

Nov 17, 2009
7:51 am

#18 pauldodo :

When truckers wear green and lace….

p
x

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
7:53 am

#19 Suka :

Maybe she’s standing like that because she wants to look like Peter Pan. But Tinkerbell was the fairy, not Peter Pan :/

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
7:54 am

#20 DucksNew :

Maybe the wrinkles are meant to add a whimsicle touch to this faerie concoction? “I’m a faerie, just slept in a bed of leaves. See these wrinkles? Yea, don’t drink nectar with elves.”

Rate this comment: +5

Nov 17, 2009
8:02 am

#21 everydaymama :

Looks like she could use a whimsicle fairy toilet!

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
8:04 am

#22 Ivriniel :

Green Fairy, huh? Suppose she was into the Absinthe when she took these pictures?

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
8:06 am

#23 sar-sar :

#17 DucksNew:

I suppose at least it’s ONLY $15.00… you can spend the money you saved on the dry cleaner.

Who is the Native American Indian in the picture on the wall, someone clue me in to that historical figure’s suffering as part of this listing.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
8:07 am

#24 Kamikaze-go-in Straight To Hell :

At first I thought this deserved a “Spelling Issues” tag; but the Jolly Green Giantess knows her archaic English. “Sleave – something suggesting the twists or coils of a skein : tangle.” Kudos!

Rate this comment: +2

Nov 17, 2009
8:10 am

#25 jukaswo :

You really have to see her other stuff. Her “ribbon ponytail falls” have just the right touch of fray, and check these out:
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=33333470

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
8:22 am

#26 Not Me :

If you dig through her shop you’ll find all kinds of ragged ribbon and hair items displayed on the floor.
O.o

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
8:23 am

#27 Jane :

#11 Cold Salt – She’s definitely not going to the ball at Lost Hope in that getup.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
8:25 am

#28 TooManyCookbooks :

Looks like the fairy toilet maker needs to make a fairy ironing board.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
8:25 am

#29 biggles5 :

As a seamstress, I’d like to add that everything in her shop looks like it was made by a 6 year old during their first sewing lesson …bunched up seams, crooked hems, threads hanging everywhere. What a bunch of crap!

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
8:32 am

#30 lynne :

I love this item – http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=21193977 – very well made and naked breast bedding in the background!

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
8:35 am

#31 Stingray Charles :

#10 Kamikaze: you’re right, standard door frames are about 6′8″, so unless the photographer is on his knees begging for mercy, she’s an Amazon. Also, she better put away the spray cleaner before her kid gets into it.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
8:36 am

#32 vangoghbabe :

This is all a misinterpretation.
Faeries are small.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
8:36 am

#33 Frankenkitty :

Does it come in cougar?

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
8:36 am

#34 Not Me :

This is the most gawd-awful creepy POS I’ve seen.
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=31471201

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
8:37 am

#35 Cold Salt :

I amazed her prices are so low.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
8:39 am

#36 Kamikaze-go-in Straight To Hell :

#25 Stingray: thanks (as always) and much love (as always). Something tells me her children are VERY obedient so the bottle’s probably no threat.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
8:44 am

#37 gotme009 :

Is the lace part supposed to since in somewhere? Because, I don’t think a lace corset(?)/vest(?)is supposed to make you look like a square lamp shade from the 50’s. I also don’t think the sleeves(?) should look like they’ve been ripped off of some thrift store mannequin. But then again, I’m not an artist.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
8:44 am

#38 gotme009 :

*since+cinch. I’m obviously not a speller either

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
8:51 am

#39 Jea :

It’s whimsicle
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=34690092

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
8:54 am

#40 hammerhead77 :

DucksNew – yeah, this evokes images of a fairy ‘ho who has had a rough night walkin’ the forest floor and hangin’ out by the woodblock. When she couldn’t net any high-rollin’ fairy johns, she decided to take those nectar-drunk elves back to her fairy nest, but they didn’t leave the right amount of magical dust on her nightstand. Now her fairy pimp is gonna be pissed and yank her wings until she cries. In her desperation, she’ll have to boff a few mountain trolls just to make a quick…

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
8:54 am

#41 hammerhead77 :

buck

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
8:55 am

#42 Fae :

…Maybe she’s special.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
8:59 am

#43 Kamikaze-go-in Straight To Hell :

#34 hammerhead77 : “I love your dream” – Ethel Shatford

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
9:04 am

#44 jojo :

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=26042447 Now that’s what I’m talkin bout.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
9:06 am

#45 Jea :

This is totally my next nanowrimo novel…LOL

#34 hammerhead77 : DucksNew – yeah, this evokes images of a fairy ‘ho who has had a rough night walkin’ the forest floor and hangin’ …..

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
9:06 am

#46 sycamore :

I’ve got to agree with #28.
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=31471201

“An extra idea: This used to be a peeing doll and the tube is still inside. Use a medicine syringe in it’s mouth and it can ‘bleed’.”
WHY?! There’s nothing quite so goth as a baby that pees blood?!

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
9:06 am

#47 Cold Salt :

She’s like Prairie Meth Girl’s less-greedy but equally untalented sister!

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
9:08 am

#48 jojo :

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=30015730 Do you think it’s OK to leave the “hospital” in this storm?

Rate this comment: +2

Nov 17, 2009
9:11 am

#49 Petite :

Price so low cos when you pick up the “item” you have breakage.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
9:13 am

#50 hammerhead77 :

How ’bout y’all write the novels and I’ll direct a fantasy-realm version of Leaving Las Vegas?
I’ll call it “Leaving Lothlorien”

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
9:22 am

#51 Jea :

#41 jojo : http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=30015730 Do you think it’s OK to leave the “hospital” in this storm?

If she’s going to use a green screen she should be a magical gothic faerie forest in the background.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
9:23 am

#52 somethinghomemade :

“When truckers wear green and lace…” LMAO!

What is really scary is that she has sold 31 of her “creations”…eek! Check out this beauty:

http://www.etsy.com/view_transaction.php?transaction_id=18913392

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
9:25 am

#53 lemon floor wax :

#20 sar-sar: It’s Native American OR American Indian. I personally go with Native American, since my grandparent’s weren’t from India but rather Wyoming.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
9:29 am

#54 lemon floor wax :

*grandparents. I need coffee.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
9:33 am

#55 i am bean :

It’s official…every hick and redneck in the universe is now selling on Etsy.

Oh, and for the record…no self respecting ‘goth’ would be caught dead in that thing. Honestly…what are these people thinking…WTF!?!

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
9:45 am

#56 Stingray Charles :

Oh Amazon, you do me wrong
To cast me off like a Tonka truck
For I have loved you well and long,
You never iron, but WTF.

Chorus:
Greensleaves my giant queen,
Put away the spray, your house is clean,
What’s up with the crown of gold,
And who but you spells it green “sleaves.”

Rate this comment: +3

Nov 17, 2009
9:51 am

#57 vangoghbabe :

positive note: She is wearing shoes

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
9:52 am

#58 Kamikaze-go-in Straight To Hell :

*SWOON*

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
10:07 am

#59 i am bean :

ok…I was so shocked I had to go back for a second look. She’s from Nebraska and her name is Mz Kittichoo Kaos!

Thanks Regretsy…now I’ve seen everything…(I think)

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
10:15 am

#60 i am bean :

me again….crikey…have you seen her artwork?

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=26041074

‘Tragic’ is only the beginning…God help us.

CANT. STOP. LOOKING. SO. BAD. HELP. ME.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
10:21 am

#61 Moons in Leo :

OMG, I have literally been bent over from laughing. This may be my favorite Etsy crafter of all time. One item is better than the next.

And thanks to all of you for adding to my enjoyment.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
10:23 am

#62 Stingray Charles :

#52 Bean, you’re right, those are awful. Maybe she’s having trouble holding the small paintbrush in her giant Amazon hand.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
10:27 am

#63 Pixie716 :

This is the creepiest “teddy bear” I’ve seen. I sure as hell wouldn’t give it to a child…it would give them nightmares.

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=31454569

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
10:29 am

#64 AnnetteCurtain :

You know when you’ve just stepped out of the shower and a delivery guy knocks on the door. Then you rummage about in the wash basket for any old shit to throw on.
Then suddenly it dawns on you that the delivery guy you’ve just seen was white as a sheet with saucers for eyes….was he checking you out in all your post shower sexiness?
No
It was because you’d thrown on a creased bedsheet, tied your dads socks on your hands and wrapped your nan’s knickers around your tits.

Rate this comment: +2

Nov 17, 2009
10:36 am

#65 personalearthquake :

fairy/goth’s really fucking confuse me: http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=33333470

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
10:37 am

#66 Cold Salt :

…

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
10:39 am

#67 vangoghbabe :

HEADLINES:
Knight Loses Life To Amazon Fairy.
Knight gives his life whilst trying to save his Tonka village from the mad fairy. He must have struggled mightily, for he left her attire in a shambles. The king states he shall not be at peace until the noble knight’s body is found. Evidence shows the Amazon fairy has cleaned all evidence from the scene.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
10:43 am

#68 vangoghbabe :

@#52 personalearthquake
42×32 pant size??????
Be on the look out for Amazon woman and accomplice, hobbit man.

Rate this comment: +2

Nov 17, 2009
10:54 am

#69 Efit :

Dammit to hell #49 Stingray Charles. First you make me fall in love with you, then you go and redo that hippie Renaissance Fair WASPy crap song and get it stuck in my head and all I can think of is Godammit she misspelled sleaves and it’s driving me nuts and now that song is in my head and I wish I could play a mandolin.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
11:05 am

#70 Stingray Charles :

#69 Efit: If it’s any consolation, that song’s been stuck in my head since 7th grade music class.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
11:06 am

#71 Efit :

#70 Stingray Charles: Eh

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
11:06 am

#72 Efit :

P.S. Stingray, it’s “Efit Milady”

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
11:08 am

#73 fancy spatula :

If you want to make a dress with sleeves, why don’t you… just…. add… sleeves?

I think my head just exploded.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
11:08 am

#74 Wanderlustbling :

This kind of looks like something I would sew – which is why I don’t attempt to sell things I sew.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
11:15 am

#75 ltcullen :

did you see her artwork? it’s more disturbing than her clothing “designs”

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
11:20 am

#76 Stingray Charles :

#72 Efit M’lady: Don’t be a Ren Fair hater.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
11:22 am

#77 worldfamousfudgy :

The look, I believe is called “Ghetto Whimsy”…

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
11:26 am

#78 Efit :

#76 Stingray Charles: Hazah!

(We should just get a room.)

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
11:27 am

#79 Efit :

#77 worldfamousfudgy: “Ghetto Whimsy” LOVE IT

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
11:34 am

#80 Sammy the Goose :

She better watch out. Her green fairy godmother is going to open up a big can of whupass and dump it all over her.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
11:47 am

#81 smemilyanne :

#29 is right – her skills as a seamstress are abysmal. You know, when you completely SUCK at sewing, the solution is not to lower your prices so you’re making about $1.50 an hour. The solution is to NOT SELL until you’re making something that people will pay at least enough for that you’ll make minimum wage for your time.

Blegh, clearly I’m no grammarian, but you know what I’m trying to say there.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
12:00 pm

#82 inkandberry :

#31 Yeah get the bottle cleaner out of the way.

And maybe shave your legs. Or is that just the bad quality of the picture and the shadow on your pale legs. You need to fix the colours on your picture too. The sleeves look brown and your body is grey.

I’m not even going to mention ironing your crap because everyone has already done so.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
12:29 pm

#83 Dix :

#29 biggles5–Amen! Hell, I’m not even a seamstress and I was thinking all this looks like she cut it out and sewed it together with her eyes closed.

Worse, she appears to have no idea how tasteless and/or inept she is. I mean, I’m not that great at sewing, either, but I don’t sell stuff.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
12:57 pm

#84 digitalduchess :

With a stance like this, she’s going to be a champ at childbirth…

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=21259973

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
1:08 pm

#85 Tabbie :

I’m still not 100% convinced this is a woman.

Rate this comment: +1

Nov 17, 2009
4:12 pm

#86 VoteAudrey :

I don’t know where to begin. Better not.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
7:54 pm

#87 js :

I am in love with Stingray Charles too. This could mean trouble.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
9:24 pm

#88 Stiflers Mom :

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=31471201

800 views
0 hearts

The clue phone is ringing . . .

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
10:09 pm

#89 ihatecowls :

Her legs are like that because she is getting ready to pose for her Customised Felted Vagoo Necklace.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 17, 2009
11:05 pm

#90 crapgawker :

@ #86 – Yeah Audrey – it’s just too overwhelming. I looked at about half of the shop. Dis-gust-ing.

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 18, 2009
10:29 am

#91 MyEyesMyEyes :

Isn’t that the same stance Robin Hood would take before breaking into song with his Merry Men?

Rate this comment: 0

Nov 18, 2009
10:32 am

#92 ChronicFabulist :

You know that greasy feeling you get after foolishly plunging into the dollar-a-pound bin at your local thrift store? Behold…she has recreated that experience online.

Rate this comment: 0