Gnome Depot

Posted by Helen Killer 63 comments

Oh, good. Somebody finally managed to combine two of the biggest obsessions in crafting: mythical creatures and bodily functions. Now if they would just make mermaid tampons, we could all go home.

Filed in Fairies 63 comments
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Nov 16, 2009
10:20 am
#1 AnnetteCurtain :
Do fairies shit in the woods?

Not any fucking more they don’t.

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Nov 16, 2009
10:21 am
#2 bffm79 :

It’s accented with glitter. Awesome.

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Nov 16, 2009
10:22 am
#3 ! :

With the economy the way it is, that roll of toilet paper is going to be stolen soon. Damn wood sprites!

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Nov 16, 2009
10:31 am
#4 everydaymama :

What, no magazine to read while working it on the throne?

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Nov 16, 2009
10:31 am
#5 Stingray Charles :

That’s why faeries walk so strangely, they have splinters in their ass from using wooden toilets.

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Nov 16, 2009
10:32 am
#6 primpmybride :

Remember, as long as you stick your pinky out, using the crapper in view of others is totally acceptable. But if you are dropping a deuce, make sure to use both pinkies.

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Nov 16, 2009
10:33 am
#7 sar-sar :

I’m surprised that the listing title is “with frog” as opposed to “with glitter.” Please tell me that this is tagged “whisicle”.

Mermaid tampons — Helen Killer, you slay me!
I did actually have to look at the listing to see if the toilet seat opened to a bowl… that would be cruel to entice a fairy to simply defecate on a pretend toilet… but thank goodness all the fairies have a place to go now… instead of just pooing like birds all over all sorts of random objects… damn…

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Nov 16, 2009
10:33 am
#8 pyro176018 :

Oh fucking great, now that you’ve asked it’ll show up within a month… drafting, design, clay models, not to mention the product testing. ick.

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Nov 16, 2009
10:33 am
#9 3lvi :

but… but…. is it just the angle, or is there NO HOLE in that toilet?? do the gnomes have magical shit teleporting ability?

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Nov 16, 2009
10:33 am
#10 Stingray Charles :

TP holder is a nice touch, “don’t forget to wipe whimsicle-y.”

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Nov 16, 2009
10:41 am
#11 PokerFace :

At first I was like, where on earth is the frog?! Then I found him. That toilet paper must have been painstaking to wrap like that.

Not suitable for children? I personally do not know any adults who still play with dollhouses. But maybe someone with a reborn baby would love this set. We know that baby will be safe from having to regurgitate splinters.

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Nov 16, 2009
10:47 am
#12 silentmouth :

My team of engineers is hard at work on mermaid tampons as we speak — patent pending.

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Nov 16, 2009
10:47 am
#13 marimoy :

WOW! I want one full size. I love glitter where I shit! lol REALL?!?!?! who comes up with this stuff?

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Nov 16, 2009
10:50 am
#14 Stingray Charles :

Does Tinkerbelle get pissed off when Peter Pan leaves the seat up?

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Nov 16, 2009
10:51 am
#15 AnnetteCurtain :

Personally, if I was a woodland fairy, I’d magic my knobbly logs straight out of my brown eye and far, far away.

Anyway, I’d be far too busy tying leafy bandages around ickle wickle rabbit’s paws to be sitting on the crapper all day.

That shit’s for gnomes and such.

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Nov 16, 2009
10:52 am
#16 vangoghbabe :

I’d like to see a little embroidery on the TP, please..if you’re going to be an artist, for God sake be an artist. give 100% people

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Nov 16, 2009
10:55 am
#17 pottery123 :

Why is the frog waiting for the fairy to come and shit?

Oh, my sick mind, is getting carried away.

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Nov 16, 2009
10:55 am
#18 crapgawker :

Because it sparkles it should also be tagged “Twilight”.

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Nov 16, 2009
10:59 am
#19 VoteAudrey :

Eh. I’m so over these Etsy whims. Thinking I can browse MoMa store’s sale section for gift ideas, I get smacked with more of the “w” word. Now it’s just ruined: MoMA is using the term “whimsical.”

SEE:
http://www.momastore.org/museum/moma/ProductDisplay_Flip-Top%20Flower_10451_10001_51245_-1_11523_11523#

Flip-Top Flower
Escama Studio, 2008

These whimsical flower brooches combine sustainable design with traditional handiwork.

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Nov 16, 2009
11:04 am
#20 Stingray Charles :

#17: He’s waiting for the flies that are attracted to the smell of faerie crap.

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Nov 16, 2009
11:11 am
#21 AnonymousBastard :

Personally I’m thankful for a product like this. I am so sick and tired of seeing fairy shit on my car windshield.

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Nov 16, 2009
11:12 am
#22 Helen Killer :

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Nov 16, 2009
11:23 am
#23 Stingray Charles :
Thanks, Helen. What’s in that stack? Vanity Faerie? Better Gnomes and Gardens? Whimsicle Geographic?

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Nov 16, 2009
11:25 am
#24 digitalduchess :

Is it me, or does that look like glittery splooge behind the toilet? Was Edward nearby, lending a hand to the crafter?

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Nov 16, 2009
11:33 am
#25 8,465,789 :

“Was Edward nearby, lending a hand to the crafter?”
Only if the crafter is a cougar.
Excellent, Helen!

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Nov 16, 2009
11:37 am
#26 ohdearydearyme :

I think I must be alone in loving on this….

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Nov 16, 2009
11:41 am
#27 jeffreyrcarey :

Y’all crackin’ me up. Thanks for the bathroom humor.

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Nov 16, 2009
11:42 am
#28 vangoghbabe :

http://www.adagency.com/img/lg/WD-40_ToiletFairy.jpg

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Nov 16, 2009
11:43 am
#29 jeffreyrcarey :

I especially like #15 AnnetteCurtain’s reference to “logs”.

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Nov 16, 2009
11:45 am
#30 everydaymama :

Ah, Helen I luvs ya!!! :)

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Nov 16, 2009
11:50 am
#31 NinjaGato :

Oh silly Etsian everybody knows that Fairys dont poop. However they do embroider wimsicle images onto toilet paper.

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Nov 16, 2009
11:50 am
#32 jellybeanminis :

Ok, you guys always make me laugh! #15 – LOVE IT!

And, um #25 you’re not alone – I own one of these :) There’s glitter in the toilet too which just makes me giggle!

Yeah – there are lots of adults that collect miniatures :) Maybe we’re just reliving our misspent youth??

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Nov 16, 2009
11:53 am
#33 jeffreyrcarey :

A seat suitable for fairy tail.

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Nov 16, 2009
12:03 pm
#34 vangoghbabe :

#31 so that they can go wee wee

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Nov 16, 2009
12:06 pm
#35 pauldodo :

Holy Jesus on a laptop on a fairy toilet!

p
x

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Nov 16, 2009
12:08 pm
#36 vangoghbabe :

#33 dude, it’s a frog…not Jesus…..

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Nov 16, 2009
12:18 pm
#37 Stingray Charles :

#24: He was probably rubbing the crafter’s whimsicles.

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Nov 16, 2009
12:28 pm
#38 KnifewieldingDick :

I am so sick of “whimsical,” used to describe anything. For me, it’s a code word for “crap.”

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Nov 16, 2009
12:34 pm
#39 jeffreyrcarey :

#14 Stingray Charles, did you mean Tinkle Bell?

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Nov 16, 2009
12:37 pm
#40 Stingray Charles :

#39: HAHA, yes.

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Nov 16, 2009
12:42 pm
#41 jeffreyrcarey :

Do fairies ever get a visit from Humpty Dumpty?

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Nov 16, 2009
12:44 pm
#42 jeffreyrcarey :

Mermaid tampons are just sponges, no?

(back to work, Jeff)

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Nov 16, 2009
12:50 pm
#43 takilasunrise :

It’s missing the can of air freshener, though…..

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Nov 16, 2009
12:51 pm
#44 Ivriniel :

Hey Helen,

I think we need to see this piece photoshopped into the picture with the fairy nest.

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Nov 16, 2009
12:52 pm
#45 Ivriniel :

talilasunrise: Didn’t you know? Fairy feces smell like flowers.

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Nov 16, 2009
1:02 pm
#46 Stingray Charles :

#45: Fairy Feces Smell Like Flowers – wasn’t that the name of Donovan’s first album?

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Nov 16, 2009
1:09 pm
#47 Stingray Charles :

#42: I’m picturing The Little Mermaid with Spongebob Squarepants. I need to get back to wirk.

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Nov 16, 2009
1:13 pm
#48 jellybeanminis :

Stingray Charles, I just peed a little – glittery pee nonetheless!!

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Nov 16, 2009
1:14 pm
#49 freckleyredhead :

I’m so glad the frog is there. Because it just wouldn’t be the same without it.

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Nov 16, 2009
1:15 pm
#50 wprovencher :

#16…I’m still lol

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Nov 16, 2009
2:15 pm
#51 dangerousmezzo :

Note that, according to the seller,”the toilet opens and contains “real water” and fairy dust”

For dust read crap, I suppose.

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Nov 16, 2009
2:25 pm
#52 personalearthquake :

UMmm, where would a mermaid tampon even GO????

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Nov 16, 2009
3:24 pm
#53 sbarnes2 :

She’s sold 10 of these fairy toilets. Maybe people use them as bathroom accessories? I hope they’re not really putting them in trees, like this woman I saw on Wifeswap- she had turned a hole in one of her trees into a fully furnished fairy house. She made the family she swapped with do it too. Crazy…

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Nov 16, 2009
3:25 pm
#54 Holly Weird :

I feel sad that a tree had to die for this to exist.

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Nov 16, 2009
3:49 pm
#55 Lara :

Bacon Sofa

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Nov 16, 2009
7:17 pm
#56 Mackerel :

#26:

I think its kinda silly and cute too. >.>

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Nov 16, 2009
9:05 pm
#57 YippySkippy :

WTH is up with this?! The last time I checked fairies pissed rainbows and shit butterflies. They don’t even NEED a freakin toilet!

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Nov 16, 2009
11:23 pm
#58 snarkeygirl :

#15, you made me pee a little. “that shit’s for gnomes and such”

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Nov 16, 2009
11:25 pm
#59 Stiflers Mom :

Hey, this is a good thing. No more Fairy Fairy in the sky, why’d you do that in my eye.

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Nov 17, 2009
3:56 am
#60 StinkBait :

Does the toilet set lift up? If not, what’s the point?

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Nov 18, 2009
8:07 am
#61 bllsunrise :

If a fairy shits in the woods and no one is there to hear it, does it still make a splash??

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Nov 18, 2009
8:10 am
#62 bllsunrise :

Instructions: Little Fairy, place your “tiny” butthole on the “knothole” on the log, grunt really hard to push tiny turd through the wood.

Need to be a Ninja Fairy to accomplish task.

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Dec 4, 2009
1:16 pm
#63 Kludge :

I thought the whole point of being a fairy is you didn’t have to take shits.

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