Am I the only one who thinks this looks like baby David Caruso?
Looks creepy!! Like half monkey half emaciated child… Someone is starving their doll!
This is creepy way to realistic and it looks like it has a rash
WTF does “reborn” mean?
Holy shitballs! That rates up there with clowns in creepy factor….
This may be the creepiest thing you’ve ever shown. WTF?!
Caruso’s eyes aren’t freaky enough for that doll to be him. . . but I could be persuaded if it comes equipped with a pack of really terrible one-liners.
Just horrible. I know I’m going to wake up screaming tonight.
when taxidermy goes too far…
This is haunted house scary
#4 Skate Reborn is when they make a doll look exactly like a real baby so people(usually old creepy people) can take care of them without having to worry that they’ll grow up. They usually don’t look as creepy as this though…
potato beads? have you a photo?
Holy fuck, that is THE SCARIEST doll I have ever seen. Totally looks like David Caruso, too. It should come with a pair of sunglasses so it can take them off.
Sorry, this one fried my cerebellum. Helen, the resemblance is uncanny, what’s more uncanny is that you spotted it. “You really are the brightest witch of your age”.
OMG ITS EYES FOLLOW YOU ACROSS THE ROOM! *closes laptop and rinces eyes out with acid*
the people that make and buy these things scare the crap out of me!
Ugh ugh eek, reborn dolls! SO CREEPY. #11 CraftingBlues nails it. More info:
Oh, and I like the photo you picked for the listing, Helen, better than the one the seller picked. Why are all her photos of this abortion sideways? My fave is the second one, which screams, “No, Daddy, I’ll be good …”
#11, thanks, I was wondering too. Do you know what the magnets do?
I AM SO SCARED!
“Sweet” my ass! The magnets in that creepy little bastard can short out a pacemaker in two seconds.
And note that it will kill people with pacemakers. How about people scared of freaky little deformed undead babies?
Oh. Scary! O_o
Dear Lord, that is, HANDS DOWN, the creepiest and most horrifying thing I have EVER seen. And I have seen some pretty scary business! Please, tell me, WHO IN THE HELL would want this…this…this THING!?
#17, thanks for the link, “Reborn dolls are also known as living dolls or unliving dolls” – Wikipedia. I’m no longer snarking, I’m really getting freaked out.
#19, the magnets are there to hold the pacifier and toys to the baby… But they can also kill you or erase your bank cards ;P
Everyone should click the link at #17, thanks again Redshirt Knitting.
Frankenstein’s baby monster
“it lives” (kinda)
#19 Kamikaze… Its to hold the ‘MAGNETIC BINKY’ in place. But why would the magnet be so strong? Makes you wonder were else the binky attaches to…
btw, why do sellers always think you want to keep reading the description when its ALL IN CAPS? It makes me say ‘NEXT’
This is a nice reborn
Is it supposed to look like a human/chimp hybrid?
AN SWEET GINGER HUMANZEE WITH DEADLY, DEADLY MAGNETS. SO REALISTIC HE WILL COME TO LIFE AND KILL YOU IN YOUR SLEEP.
Thank you @26 & @29.
Hey @21 Stingray Charles, caught up to you on How Know, hope you saw, anyway, congratulations.
I still do not understand why people want these – what the hell happened to just bronzing their booties?
Shit, How Now I mean.
I was going to say that the rug on it’s head made it look like Donald Trump but yeah I totally see David Caruso.
Does anyone remember the South Park “Kick the Baby” episode where Stan tells his little brother Ike to do his “impression of David Caruso’s career” and Ike does a swan dive and lands headfirst into the snow?
I think the people that carry these things around are creepiest of all! Sick sick sick!!
“There are several examples of families who have put their reborn dolls in a room with actual children. They throw birthday parties for them (I have to assume it’s the same birthday every year), take them to the playground, and invite friends over for baby showers”.
@ #30, See that one looks like Kevin Costner.
Real Dolls are totally less freaky than this Reborn baby dolls.
Yeah, whatever baby hater.
I really hope that this isn’t based on a real baby, because DAMN that thing would have had terrible genes.
That kid doesn’t have a forehead it has a fivehead.
#37, Helen, thank you! Real time proof you are amazing, can you see famous people in real babies too?
You MUST look at this one: Lunch Money/Key Bag Necklace? WTF.
@ #36 everydaymama:
Holy Crap! Why have I never heard about this? Can’t people just get a dog or a cat? Or a hobby? Or maybe just check themselves into a “facility?” This is cuh-razy!
So creepy. Can you imagine if human babies really looked like this?
If this… thing… were in my house I could never sleep, eat, or breathe. I’d have to set it on fire. If I EVER see it in someone else’s house, I shall also set it on fire and then set fire to the witch that bought it.
Oh! Mabey Granny Montana will buy it and raise it to be the next Hannah! She IS creepy enough.
Oh my f***…holy hell, I think this beats out the cow skull for me. They don’t have to be hideous, #30 Jea’s link shows that…why oh why? AND WHY IS THE SELLER SCREAMING? Are the dolls possessed? Are they trying to murder the seller?
It’s baby Kate Moss the bulimia baby! Gagging at how lame “reborn babies are”
OMG…I don’t want to sleep alone to night.
From the Wikipedia article: “the dolls often come with fake birth certificates or adoption certificates.” The birther mystery solved at last: Obama is a reborn doll. Someone call Orly Taitz!
@#42 – OMG dangerousmezzo – I know – what the hell is THAT all about? Man this is one twisted sister making this crap.
I am still in some form of shock here. Do people really find these things “cute?” Not to be overly-realistic here, but they look like real DECEASED infants. There is nothing cute about a dead child. At least not in my universe.
I asked my 6yrold what he thought of the doll. He insisted it was a real baby. He doesn’t believe you can’t sell babies online.
Yeah, I watched a BBC special on “reborn” babies. You have to see the documentary to even remotely understand what is going on here. And then you can die knowing you’ve been properly disturbed.
And according to the “reliable” source of TMZ, David Caruso has lil’ photo autographed cards he can just hand out to people. He keeps ‘em as a timesaver. I think the seller should contact Mr. Caruso, as I’m sure he’d be eager to send a card for the proud parent of this doll.
#45 CraftingBlues :
LMAO! I’m with you. Fire is the only way.
angry jack o lantern eating a baby
ET… Phone home. We found your baby.
I think this “baby” also looks a lot like Jerry Stiller. http://www.buzzine.com/media/data/albums/7/Jerry_Stiller_20071011.jpg
I lOVE Regretsy, by the way.
#42 dangerousmezzo & #50 crapgawker – I am seriously surprised this didn’t make the gag gift guide list. At $6, it’s a steal…
@#48 pottery123: you can come over to my house, I’ll watch over you cause I’M NEVER SLEEPING AGAIN AS LONG AS I LIVE. This shit is real! And people call me a pervert!
#42 dangerousmezzo, that one stood out to me too. Some of her redone fashion dolls look like there was thought put into them, but that. . . that’s proof that inside any of us there might be a freaky Barbie-head-fetishizing monster waiting to come out.
And #38 Cold Salt, I am gonna say that Real Dolls are still way, way more messed up than these reborn dolls, which are indeed sort of messed up.
I remember seeing these on ebay a few years ago and reading everything I could about them. I was amazed and mortified at the same time. But this one…OMG it is terrifyingly BAD. What baby wears a merkin at that age!
#53 VoteAudrey : Here’s the documentary from BBC, and many MORE odd videos are on the right sidebar too.
looks like this person used the same face mold
These dolls creep me out. And intrigue me at the same time.
I dunno… something about those Reborn dolls.
Anyway, is this sort of thing even OK to sell on Etsy? Is the seller handcrafting these herself? Somehow I doubt it.
There are people who actually make those dolls, so she probably does make them herself. The BBC doc posted in 61 talks about a woman who “sculpts” them.
#61 everydaymama thanks for spreading the terror; as #62 Jea said, it’s creepy yet fascinating. Like most scary movies, we just can’t turn away!
It’s never too early for a comb over. I kind of want him in my life.
I opened a new tab to show the spouse today’s horrors and let out a stream of terrified gibberish. The Baby David Caruso toy helped keep me from dropping my laptop and running away, screaming.
#66 VoteAudrey :
#61 everydaymama thanks for spreading the terror
Glad I could help ;P
dangerousmezzo is right about the threat to folks with pacemakers; my heart is (was) perfectly fine, but the palpitations I’m experiencing now are worrying me.
I want to know who buys this stuff, so I never ever make the mistake of wandering into their homes. *shudder*
NO. NO. no. no. no. no. no. no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.no.
As fellow members of the human race, all of us have a a duty and an obligation to find David Caruso, sedate him as humanely as possible, and perform an immediate, emergency vasectomy. Allowing him to breed is not an option.
Baby Caruso looks like he borrowed Baby Trump’s toupee.
baby Caruso looks creepy as fuck.
holy shit, who would pay $159.00 for this awful monstrosity?
Sunglasses? I need eye bleach.
ooh baby. I’ve been waiting for one of these to show up on regretsy…
I love that they can fuck up your pacemaker. File under how to rid yourself of a creepy auntie or neighbor?
#42- that seller freaks me out!! All of those refurbished barbies look like bad drag queens. All the lines are uneven and creepified by her all caps descriptions. I sure as hell hope they’re one of a kind…christ.
Wow. This beautiful stillborn child is pretty sweet too!
i think if i had a baby that looked like that i would have to kill myself. i hope it wasn’t based off someone’s real baby. *shudders*
rooted light brown hair…
the whole doll is rooted..
oh, people who are into these dolls often push the baby dolls around in strollers and talk to them, I met one once. There was a screen, so it looked like a real baby at first, but then you noticed it wasn’t moving. If someone asked about how old it was, or if it was a boy or girl, the lady would talk about it as if it were alive. She would admit it was a doll eventually, which led to people backing away slowly and getting as far from her as possible. So fucked up.
Good lord, David Caruso knocked up his RealDoll.
Aaah! Aaah! Aaah! What IS that??
I think it’s the hair. If it didn’t have hair it would just look like an ugly baby. With all that hair it looks like some sort of old man baby…
@ #82, Oh Rob, you made me laugh. Why didn’t I think of that? I could have saved myself an hour of Photoshop.
My 16 year old: “If they forced teens to ‘care’ for these in a parenting class isntead of bags of flour, it would curb teen pregnancy!”
She also says she’ll have nightmares now. I think I will too.
#78, Oooooh, creepy! Looks like the well-reserved 2-year old Sicilian girl from the 20′s I saw in some documentary on embalming or somesuch.
Scary baby who can kill? No thanks.
Also, it looks like it’s been beat.
Abused, hairy, scary baby with magnetic killing powers? Pass, and maybe we should call Batman.
at first i thought: if someone needed a “baby” that was this realistic, then they should just HAVE one. then i realized the error in that logic; anyone creepy and fucked up enough to actually want one of these could only produce offspring that was destined to turn into a serial killer.
I guess this was inevitable: http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=33001130
GOOD GOD! I screamed out loud when I saw IT.
#87 That Sicilian mummy girl is adorable compared to these dolls. Some of them are just horrific! Scarier than a real preserved human child.
#90, not buying it till I see the dazzle.
Oh, just look at him.
Yeah, he really is breathtaking!
(totally and absolutely freaky. inbred?)
That wiki link has totally scared the crap out of me. There are some very f-ed-up people out there (buyers AND sellers!)
#30 That woman makes the crappiest reborns ever. If you want to see good ones, go look around ebay. There are some artists who actually do a nice job and don’t complete one doll a day. A good reborn takes weeks.
Looking at that is like birth control for me
#88 TooFewShoes :
“Abused, hairy, scary baby with magnetic killing powers? Pass, and maybe we should call Batman.”
Good idea! Though, it kinda looks like a baby Modok:
Lots of creepy reborns out there:
It reminds me of a stillborn :-/ Scary! Also, my mom used to look after this elderly lady that had a whole collection of these she “looked after”. They had their own room and everything. She was kind of nuts though. She never married and lived alone and kept the babies for company. I later found out that she had been sexually assaulted when she was younger by a relative which explains why she had issues but it was still creepy to come into her house and see all those dolls staring at you^_^
I certainly hope…..
*slide glasses down nose**
You are not making fun of Horatio Caine…
Because, if you are…..
I am going to be back for you…
Don’t leave town….
**insert CSI Miami noise here**
Am I the only one who thought $150 was reasonably priced for this magnetized abortion?
#100 Yah I actually thought that too. But I don’t understand are these people MAKING the faces or just painting them. Because if they are buying them to paint, why would such an ugly baby face even exist?
#99 Holy Zombie Jesus, that’s ugly! What species is that?
Oh, oh, whyowhy! That one is something else! Actually, I believe it’s Bruce Dickinson from Iron Maiden….
Epiphany….thought about having more kids….also need a fridge magnet…could kill two birds with one stone with this …..
#101 They are buying vinyl dolls or kits and painting them. In this case…..very badly.
Am I the only one who thinks it looks more like a surprised Kevin Bacon?
skin looks like undercooked bacon
Probably pretty alarmed at the thought of some oddball buying him and treating him like a Real Live Baby.
I actually got a little fright when this appeared on screen
its the most miserable baby i have ever seen
Perfect example of the Uncanny Valley, I think.
check out the eyebrows on this one:
Isn’t this “reborn” shit over yet?
While I find the reborn baby idea disturbing in general, I have seen some from other makers that look like happy, healthy, vibrant babies. After looking at her entire inventory, several of her “reborn” babies look like they are terribly sick, dead, or they look like they have been physically abused. I don’t think it’s a good sign when the first thought that comes to mind is “hey, this baby looks like it’s been beaten!” or “hey, this baby looks like it’s in a comatose state!” Sad.
*** DOLL IS FOR ADULT COLLECTORS ONLY. ***
This warning has far too many interesting implications.
looks like kevin bacon to me
Badass super villain name: MAGNETIC BINKY.
This doll scared me shitless to the point I had to go check on my (sleeping) infant son to make sure he was okay.
This doesn’t remind anyone else of Brian Peppers?
@ #78 tdmac – I know someone who works at CPS and I seriously want to call him and report this poor baby who just got a can of whupass opened on him. (ref: http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=34197591)
@ #111 ihatecowls – reminds me of this http://twitpic.com/2qgri – Say What? (Que Dices?)
These remind opf the photos they used to take back in the olden days of the dead. Dress babies in their christening outfits, sitting propped up in a chair like they were still alive……creeeeeeeeeeeeee….ppppppppppyyyyyyyyy
I looked into its eyes and now I don’t think I’ll ever stop screaming inside.
Caruso sent the maker at lease a 5×7 photo for her to create this doll. It does have a lot of charter.
#117 @ Night Cowl…Those photo’s were a lot less creepy than this doll. They were capturing their child for memories. This is just spastic, nasty and ugh. Even David Caruso probably wasn’t this repellent as a baby.
#117: it’s really worse. My ex randomly decided to collect those pics. Got sick of them just as suddenly. So I kind of became caretaker of the photos. It felt OK because I felt like the people in the pics (including infants) were loved so much by someone at some time. These dolls, if they’re loved like that, it’s beyond creepy. Plus none of the pics were open-eyed. Or in full grotesque color (most just black & white, some had coloring done to the photo itself).
I found the pictures to be sad and often in somewhat bad taste but photography back then was costly so these pics were sometimes the only photos people had of their loved ones. Kind of a touching tribute in a way, or a twisted souvenir (we even had some that were made into postcards).
I’ll be the first to admit that reborn dolls (and real babies for that matter) terrify me, but this is some serious Stephen King shit.
My god, that’s scary.
Looks like Michael from Halloween. If my baby came out looking like that I would give it to an orphanage…..in some far away land…where he could never find me. Looks like he should have been born with a butcher knife in his hand.
The doll is creepy- no doubt about that.
But it is well done.
My daughter had weird rashes all the time when she was a baby- would I want to remember that always?… no BUT hey, to each her own.
As for people collecting these- how is it any different that collecting realistic action figures of Johnny Depp ? Some people may be wacky (no argument there) but MAYBE some people love to collect dolls that are realistic and not just simplified versions of real babies.
This is creepy:
No more, I promise.
If you ever wanted to have a preemie:
I was thinking more Baby Ted Koppel.
Fuck Uncanny Valley, that thing is Uncanny Grand Canyon.
The doll is pretty freakin creepy…
But the whole thing about people acting like they’re real babies and taking them to the park and shit gives me serious chills. Ugh.
Hey if any Stingray it may be time to take a breather from their boards. Otherwise there may be an influx of angry artisans on Regretsy looking for your head on a spit. It’d be better than your face on one of these dolls but still
Oh man my post got all fucked lmao…that;s what I get for having too many thoughts in the middle of the night and no sleep to help them form properly
This wouldn’t be nearly as creepy without the hair! And why do reborn people always insist on making them all splotchy? yeah, some babies are, but not all of them, and that part of a new born is not cute! Nobody wants to remember how splotchy their precious newborn was, they want to remember how beautiful and perfect it was! Even if it wasn’t–they want to live in denial!
In my opinion the baby looks more like William H. Macy
William H. Baby?
of all the adjectives one could pick to describe a newborn baby, why the hell would you settle for “squishy”?
Largely more sane ways to satisfy that biological ticking clock rather than carrying a lifeless soulless baby look-a-like:
1. Do the dirty. Depending on the dude this can take less than 2 minutes and the whole process is pretty auto-pilot from then on. 9 months later, no need to fake it with creepy-assed dolls anymore!
3. Become a foster parent
4.Work in a place with babies, change some crap-filled diapers, remember the pros to a baby-less life and cure your neuroticism.
#139: you forgot
5. Steal one
ahhhh!!!! this doll is eating my soul!!!
If you wear a pacemaker, don’t try to breast feed this thing.
PS Donald Trump called, he wants his hair back.
#129- I’ve never heard of someone taking a Johnny Depp action figure out to a grocery store and passing him off as real. Or throwing it birthday parties. And I’m pretty sure an action figure isn’t weighted to give it that real Johnny Depp feel…
Oooo stop, fancy spatula! Yer gettin’ me all excited!
I thought the same thing. I wonder how many people who “like” children buy these. I feel ill.
I’m glad my real baby wasn’t that ugly otherwise I would have been asking about the return policy!
Oh yes, Helen, I got it immediately: Baby Caruso. The start of a whole line of CSI Babies. On another note, though, that doll is hideous.
That is truly frightening. Good God!
You know, I have 3 kids and am PG with my 4th (due in May), and newborns are only cute to the parents! When I look back at the newborn pics of my kids, the ones that you snap as soon as they are born, I will totally admit they are not cute! Newborns are all wrinkly, have blotches, and are just odd looking. The time they look the best is about a week after birth! Then they are totally adorable!! But that first week… Only the parents think they are the best looking little angels ever
#151- And newborn feet look like alien feet, all weird and long…
Where can I buy a realistic Johnny Depp action figure? I’d like some Johnny Depp action.
My MIL gave my daughter a regular baby doll that was the stuff of nightmares. MIL thought it was adorable. My daughter ripped its hair off and named it “ugly doll.”
Its sad to say, but you could buy a real baby in China for the price of those dolls. If you really wanted one.
@ #142 fancy spatula: “weighted to give it that real Johnny Depp Feel” – I almost wet my pants. I think I love you.
Awww, he’s got his father’s philtrum!
#82 Rob T Firefly :
Hey, anyone notice that the many of the post numbers we have referred to in our comments are all screwed up? What happened?
Umm – not to knock you or anything, but it’s anything BUT whimsicle.
I’m with #147 on this… and I still stand by my previous comment on this post. Scary O_o.
another piece for sale by this seller…. more like, i need to slap myself.
Does this also come with an alcoholic teenage mom doll?
But hey! It has ‘full limbs’! How can you resist a totally creepy doll with ‘full limbs’?
you have to admit though…it’s rockin some bad ass hair plugs.
#153 everydaymama :
FINALLY I CAN STOP FEELING BAD ABOUT THINKING PEOPLE’S NEWBORNS ARE UGLY. Cause they really really are, and no they don’t look like you, unless you look like an alien or a strange old man.
If I ever give birth to a child that looks like this doll, I might have to kill myself. I suddenly had the urge to vomit after looking at this aboniation. I may just have a nightmare tonight…
looks like it wasn’t ready to be popped out…jesus wept
Something else from the Wiki article: “Women collect reborns as they would a non-reborn doll, or purchase them to fill a void of a lost child and treat reborns as living babies. Many reborn owners have gone through miscarriages, have no means for adoption, or suffer from empty nest syndrome”
There are so many real children who need to be loved! Gosh, this is sad, very sad!
At least with this one, you don’t have to worry about SIDS. I haven’t sleep in a year since my baby was born.
#171 It’s really sad that caring for a child can be so difficult legally. Although fostering is an easier possibility, but doesn’t come with security.
Kite there are many kids that are wards of the Children’s Aid that applications of adoption can be put forward for – they just most likely will not be infants. There’s a lot of volunteering one can do in just about any community to be around and supportive to children. Adoption and pregnancy are not the only ways. My last post on this was a bit more tongue in cheek but true!
And Ducksnew, def like your finish with “steal one” lol badoom ssssshh!
When this baby was born the doctor slapped it’s mother.
Do you think this poor seller has noticed that “the thing” has received almost 6000 views?
I have never liked baby-dolls, not even as a child, and this is definately NOT an exception! I can’t imagine having this in a room with its creepy glass eyes following me everywhere… Argh! The nightmares I would have!
Creepydolls- Yeah, some people probably do want to have these just as collectables, but I think the weird thing is that most of the collectors actually want to “mother” them due to some feeling of loss (whether of their own children growning up or of a baby who died, or of never being able to conceive). Personally, I think motherisng a doll is a terrible thing to do to yourself–I had a daughter who passed away as an infant and I am certain that becoming attached to something like this (well…
…not THIS freaky one, persay, but one that looked real) would have been seriously damaging to my grief process. And I’m sure any therapist would be discouraging of these substitute babies. I mean, you’re giving love and affection to an inanimate object that will never give you anything back–how can that be good for anyone?
One big difference between this and David Caruso… this one is probably a better actor.
if you were to taxidermy an infant it would probably come out something like this.
This baby is exactly how I expected George Burns to look after reincarnation.
i literally jumped when i scrolled down to this.
OH GOD KILL IT BEFORE IT EATS US ALLLLLLLL
ok, i admit i like to recycle my ‘what if they mated’ jokes to no end…but if david caruso humped a ‘real doll’ (www.realdoll.com) this would be the result…
From the original artists website:
“The process of reborning a doll is being able to create as realistic baby as possible.
This is achieved by firstly buying or creating a baby corpse to make a doll mould from. It is then neccessary to begin peeling the skin off of the baby’s head, body and limbs through a variety of different techniques to give the doll a very realistic human skin effect. ”
OK, I may have made a few slight modifications to the text…
what?!?!? i gotta buy sunglasses 4 it 2???
Wait… Does anyone remember the show Lexx? Doesn’t it look just like Stanley the security gaurd?!
Oops at first glance he does look real. I am sure the young mums to be, I mean real young mums, would find this doll and delight to hold and play with.
This doll looks more like a pensioner than a baby!
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