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I’ll cry if I want to

Posted by Helen Killer

44 comments

Oh, like you could wear this without the hat.

Filed in Clothing 44 comments

44 Comments

Add Comment

Oct 19, 2009
6:14 pm

#1 silly squirrel :

I want her hat!!! It looks like the helper elf from The Christmas Story at Macy’s. The sweater Sucks.

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 19, 2009
6:14 pm

#2 Mantelli :

I refuse to wear the sweater without the tinfoil hat!

Rate this comment: 2 0

Oct 19, 2009
6:16 pm

#3 whyohwhy :

Wow! They sure know how to party in Friendsville, Tennessee.

Rate this comment: 1 0

Oct 19, 2009
6:16 pm

#4 rinthered :

holy $#!^ !!

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 19, 2009
6:25 pm

#5 artsnark :

Holy wow. I…
Yeah.
This one is also quite staggering http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=8483743

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 19, 2009
6:26 pm

#6 hellvetica :

I am not sure whether this ensemble or the fetching reflective bra also available in the shop is more desirable. http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_2&listing_id=32337963

I will have to devote some deep thinking time to this.

Rate this comment: 3 0

Oct 19, 2009
6:33 pm

#7 Prof. Scammington :

I like the passive-aggressive tease of the “[secondary item in photo] not for sale” warning. As if the reason it’s not for sale is because it’s already been promised to the Tate Modern.

Rate this comment: 1 0

Oct 19, 2009
6:42 pm

#8 tempesty :

Question: is shipping free to mental asylums?

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 19, 2009
6:46 pm

#9 nutcase :

i ll wear that at burning man together with the happenin’ peace3 piece, chewing on my peyote

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 19, 2009
7:04 pm

#10 3lvi :

You know, I think the hat is actually the second sleeve. When they realized that it had been sewn backwards, they re-purposed it.

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 19, 2009
7:11 pm

#11 WideSarcasmSea :

Is she a medieval hippie?

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 19, 2009
7:13 pm

#12 dr-awkward :

as for the link to the monstrosity that artsnark posted; greatest camel toe ever on the model.

Rate this comment: 1 0

Oct 19, 2009
7:14 pm

#13 clamchowder :

I see a nipple!

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 19, 2009
7:22 pm

#14 gnommy :

what I love most about this is how the stitch at the bottom was made on such huge needles it looks to scale like the Barbie ponchos my mom crocheted in the 70s.

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 19, 2009
7:24 pm

#15 HomeAlone :

It’s nice she’s selling something crocheted by the blind, I guess she forgot to leave that out of the description – that the $198 is being donated to the seeing eye dog foundation.

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 19, 2009
7:33 pm

#16 everydaymama :

It’s a runaway clown from Cirque de Soleil!!!

Rate this comment: 0 1

Oct 19, 2009
7:44 pm

#17 silly squirrel :

I got to thinking about the sweater and maybe it has already been to the party. This is all that remains.

Rate this comment: 1 0

Oct 19, 2009
7:47 pm

#18 chicaflamenca :

Do I see a nipple?

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 19, 2009
7:52 pm

#19 artsnark :

#12 dr-awkward :
I did actually miss that. And I was silly enough to go back to look.

Damn.

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 19, 2009
7:52 pm

#20 The Mayor of Bethville :

Hey! I made one of those in kindergarten! Only then it was a pot holder.

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 19, 2009
8:07 pm

#21 moi :

She has to know her nipple is showing, right? I mean, is that the whole point of the listing? “hey, I bet I can show my nipple on etsy, what piece of crap do I have that has holes and is wild enough that I can get away with it? aw, here it is. Do you think anyone will notice?”

Rate this comment: 1 0

Oct 19, 2009
8:13 pm

#22 razberries :

ok does anyone else think that it looks like a giant michael jackson thumb is tapping her on the head?

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 19, 2009
9:23 pm

#23 sar-sar :

damn it! why is the hat not for sale?!?
I demand the ability to purchase the hat!!!!!

Nothing says “I wish I was Lady Gaga” quite like this. And really, it’s about 7 years too early to actually be adroit while being ironic about the eighties, unless you’re over the age of 45.
In hipster irony, this sort of thing is actually criminal the way that wearing white shoes after labor day is a crime to the generation of Martha Stewart. Oh, what a faux pas! Biminy.

Rate this comment: 1 0

Oct 19, 2009
10:27 pm

#24 hammerhead77 :

I sometimes wonder if Etsy spawned Lady Gaga. She could find years worth of outfits and accessories at this site.

Rate this comment: 1 0

Oct 20, 2009
12:27 am

#25 quantuminsanity :

One sleeve…? ONE sleeve? What happened to the other one? I have to know! Did it tear itself off and run away in horror?
Is this catering for a very exclusive niche market of one armed blind people?

Rate this comment: 1 0

Oct 20, 2009
6:48 am

#26 YankBoffin :

Perfect for parties, indeed. When you inevitably pass out and fall on the floor, you’ll be spared then embarrassment because everyone else will mistake you for a rug.

Rate this comment: 3 0

Oct 20, 2009
6:55 am

#27 rodgertheshrubber :

@#7 Prof. Scammington

More like the “Taint Modern”…..cause it taint art and it taint fashion.

Rate this comment: 1 0

Oct 20, 2009
8:12 am

#28 goblin :

WHY CAN’T I BUY THE HAT?!

Artsnark (#5), thanks for the link to CAN’T STOP THE BUSTLE! If that sucker weren’t $900, I’d buy it and wear it around the house in perfect seriousness just to see what my husband would do. Although I might regret that after he had me committed.

Rate this comment: 1 0

Oct 20, 2009
8:29 am

#29 Karma :

I didn’t know schizophrenic homeless ladies went to parties. The hat isn’t for sale because it keeps the government from reading the seller’s mind.

Rate this comment: 3 0

Oct 20, 2009
8:47 am

#30 PussDaddy :

I can’t even think of anything to say about this, it is that bad.

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 20, 2009
9:09 am

#31 iamhydrogen14 :

“can’t stop the bustle” is amazing… you have to admire someone with the balls to describe their work as “a tangle of treasures that keeps eyes and mind engaged for hours on end”

Rate this comment: 2 0

Oct 20, 2009
9:13 am

#32 Karma :

Okay, because I’m a terrible procrastiantor I browsed this person’s shop and found this:

http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=21890191

The description says: Good Horse scented oil for hair and body-

Um, as somebody who owns horses I can honestly say that the first thing you do after petting or riding them is wash off their scent.

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 20, 2009
9:28 am

#33 iamhydrogen14 :

Dibs on the day-glo red playsuit!!!

<a href="http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=21859828"

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 20, 2009
11:37 am

#34 sistermarysunshine :

The hat is a phallic representation done in silver disco-ball glitter.

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 20, 2009
1:16 pm

#35 takilasunrise :

I can probably crochet better than that, and I have only crocheted a row or two (while learning) my entire life! Yikes!

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 20, 2009
2:38 pm

#36 artsnark :

#28 goblin : I’d pay to see the look on your husbands face at that
At the very least one could shimmy around the floor on your arse and polish the boards at the same time! Genius! And if one gets bored, there is a whole plethora of weird things on your belly with which to amuse and entertain. Now why didn’t I think of that!

Rate this comment: 0 0

Oct 20, 2009
6:14 pm

#37 YippySkippy :

Somehow this poor girl has managed to get her head trapped in a pan of man-eating Jiffy Pop and has lived to tell the story! It’s obvious that the condition of the sweater is just a result of her friends’ struggle to keep the rest of her body from being sucked into popcorn hell.

Rate this comment: 2 0