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Empty Nest

Posted by Helen Killer

28 comments

You’re 40 years old, making yarn nests for imaginary creatures and pretending you found a lint ball in a tree. Get some fucking help.

Filed in Annoying Descriptions, Art 28 comments

28 Comments

Add Comment

Oct 19, 2009
9:09 am

#1 sar-sar :

wtf?
I admit, I laughed when I saw this… and then had to wipe off my computer screen. What the hell? You needle-felted a “nest” which you then placed in some blair witch sticks, and according to the description “enchanted gardens inspire sparkling additions to a nature table or to display special treasures…” — which I guess I may have read wrong, but do you want me to put this on my table as a centerpiece? Like something that would certify to my houseguests that I have seriously lost my mind, and maybe if you’re sleeping over, then sleep lightly or leave something jangley on the doorknob… or I might play out some weird fairy fantasy on you?

Okay, I’ve overthought that. Multicolored faux lint balled up between blair witch sticks, uh, yeah.

Rate this comment: +6

Oct 19, 2009
9:17 am

#2 Fae :

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

Rate this comment: -10

Oct 19, 2009
9:30 am

#3 The Mayor of Bethville :

Okay, seriously? No self-respecting fairy would live in a ball of lint. They have castles made of dew drops.

Rate this comment: +7

Oct 19, 2009
9:33 am

#4 Karma :

My cat hacks up more attractive fur balls.

Rate this comment: +5

Oct 19, 2009
9:36 am

#5 moi :

mayor or bethville makes me laugh. And I’m totally jealous of her witty name.

And…how many times am I going to try and click on one of the little thumbnails to see it larger before i realize that it frickin takes me to their profile page?! I’m almost as big an idiot as the people who make some of this stuff (some, not all…some actually takes talent to create, as misguided as it is).

Rate this comment: +2

Oct 19, 2009
10:07 am

#6 MinnePurl :

That happened to my fiber stash once and I was furious. I see now that my fury blinded me into stupidly thinking that now that the wool was unspinnable, the best I could hope for was pillow stuffing. I could have sold it as a fairy wonderland (but alas, I have no sticks)

Rate this comment: +4

Oct 19, 2009
10:34 am

#7 GuiltyEtsySeller :

i suspect I’ll never understand the appeal of some fiber art. I’ve seen some beautiful “nests” on etsy – some made with wire, some with fiber – but this doesn’t look like anything.

The seller though must be doing okay – over 200 sales! Dang. I think I need to make some fairy nests!

Rate this comment: +2

Oct 19, 2009
10:43 am

#8 vangoghbabe :

I’ll go green…
between this and the dream catcher ladder…
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!! SAVE THE TREES!!!!

Rate this comment: +2

Oct 19, 2009
11:29 am

#9 AnnetteCurtain :

Spun from the pubes of a unicorn no doubt.

Rate this comment: +7

Oct 19, 2009
12:58 pm

#10 Rachel :

What a waste of scarf material Or things to apply neosporin with. Or maybe toilet paper if you’re in a pinch…

HAY, BUT IT’LL TOTALLY ATTRACT ALL THOSE FAIRIES RIGHT? So it’s hideousness is SO worth it. Then I can use the FAIRY CATCHING KIT I bought at Barnes and Noble.

Rate this comment: +1

Oct 19, 2009
2:27 pm

#11 iamhydrogen14 :

Are you sure that’s not a placenta pillow?

Rate this comment: +3

Oct 19, 2009
2:40 pm

#12 StinkBait :

My dryer makes better ones that that. Dry a few different colored fleece and the same colors and texture can be pulled off my dryer screen.

Rate this comment: +1

Oct 19, 2009
4:11 pm

#13 hammerhead77 :

“comes with 3 sparking fairy eggs”

Won’t those burn down the enchanted woodland??

Rate this comment: +1

Oct 19, 2009
4:14 pm

#14 menolikey :

give me a fucking break with this artsy craftsy nesty wooly shit. just look at the featured seller today. faux acorns? really?

Rate this comment: 0

Oct 19, 2009
5:57 pm

#15 redhead :

#5 moi :

And…how many times am I going to try and click on one of the little thumbnails to see it larger before i realize that it frickin takes me to their profile page?!
______________________

Yes, when I click I want to read about the item shown, not the artists’s profile. Some of them have several pages of items and it’s a pain to search.

Please make it easy for us and link to the item in question! Plus if a reader is interested in buying that item (eek!), click, they’re right there.

Rate this comment: 0

Oct 19, 2009
6:10 pm

#16 whyohwhy :

More ferret/cat toy than fairy nest.

Rate this comment: 0

Oct 19, 2009
6:21 pm

#17 rinthered :

this item seems to have made Helen especially angry.

Rate this comment: 0

Oct 19, 2009
7:04 pm

#18 Helen Killer :

@#5 and @15, you are absolutely right. Never occurred to me. I’ll do that from now on.

Rate this comment: 0

Oct 19, 2009
7:42 pm

#19 HomeAlone :

I really thought it was felted brains. You know, for Halloween.

Yeah if there was a link to the item page, it would be easier to gather more ammunition for more of this playful poking.

Rate this comment: 0

Oct 19, 2009
7:59 pm

#20 anaisnun :

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

Rate this comment: -3

Oct 19, 2009
8:00 pm

#21 Helen Killer :

@#20, It must be you. I yawned reading your comment.

Rate this comment: +5

Oct 20, 2009
12:55 am

#22 everydaymama :

Wow! I have better things than this that my 7 year old made in arts and crafts. Come on! If this crap is considered artistic then I’ll eat a ball of fuzzy yarn and hack it up too!

Rate this comment: 0